DISCLAIMER: I own NONE of the characters, ideas, or people used in this story. This is just something that was written instead of studying for something. Probably a math test or something equally useless. I don't even remember anymore.
If you have any suggestions, please feel free to email me! I love to get ideas for my stories from the people that actually read them!
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The Ultimate Crossover - Part 2 : Concerning Hobbits
Setting: Coliseum, Gladiator Times....
SAM: Well Frodo. Look what trouble you've walked us into today...
FRODO: SAM! I DIDN'T DO THIS!! You were the one that used the map for a napkin!
SAM: Well I had to use something Mister Frodo. I wasn't going to go about with crumbs all over my face, now was I?
MEL: I have a question... Umm... What are you? And why are you here?
FRODO: Did we not already tell you?
SAM: I believe we did...
FRODO and SAM turn to eachother and start to talk.
SAM: I'm not trusting that one big person. He looks like an orc to me...
SAM and FRODO look over their shoulders at MEL.
FRODO: Let's check sting. It'll tell us if that big people is an orc.
FRODO draws Sting. Sting shines a bright blue. FRODO and SAM gasp.
SAM: So he is an orc then! We shall have to do away with him as soon as possible!
MEL: Hey! Didn't I ask you a question over here!
The hobbits turn and have an evil glare on their faces. Both have their swords drawn and are slowly walking towards MEL.
MEL: Woah-kay... What happened to you fellows? You were all nice a second ago...
FRODO and SAM: ORC!!!
MAXIMUS: Oh no! They caught me!
ALL turn to look at MAXIMUS.
MAXIMUS: I mean... cough
FRODO and SAM turn back to MEL and keep slowly walking forwards. MEL can do nothing but cry like a little sissy girl. Just when FRODO and SAM are about to stand MEL in various places the DRAGON FROM DRAGON HEART swoops down and saves MEL.
MEL: WOHOO! See ya suckers!
ALL: Aww...
MEL: Thank you so much Dragon from Dragon Heart!
DRAGON FROM DRAGON HEART: Actually, I didn't really save you... I just wanted to kill you for myself...
In a single chomp the DRAGON FROM DRAGON HEART eats MEL up.
MEL: Help! Please! I'll do anything! PLEASE!!!
DRAGON FROM DRAGON HEART: Shut up in there!
DRAGON FROM DRAGON HEART flies away from the scene because DARTH FLIRT (the writer) has no further use for him in the story.
KEANU: Where did she come from?
JAMES BOND: I quite agree... She did seem a little odd.. But at least she killed off that annoying Mel fellow..
KEANU: I agree... I never liked that "Mel" person...
JAMES BOND: Me neither.. I mean... Blowing my head off? How un-cultured...
KEANU: I agree... He could have done something far more tasteful then that!
FRODO: Wait... Weren't you both dead a second ago?
KEANU and JAMES BOND: Oh yea... Sorry!
KEANU and JAMES BOND both fall down dead... again...
FRODO: Why did they come back to life?
P. LEIA: We don't know... I think it's part of the writer's evil plot to take over the world...
MARY POPPINS: Oh don't be silly. They are broght back to life by my charming voice!
ALL (except MARY POPPINS) shudder in unison.
DARTH FLIRT: No no no! FOOLS! I bring them back to life to allow for comic relief for people that actually like those characters... Not like that's a bad thing of course... cough
FRODO: Where did you come from?
DARTH FLIRT: Oh, I'm writing this story. And I felt like popping in to allow the readers a break from this insanity.
FRODO: Oh, I get it...
SAM: I don't... pouts
DARTH FLIRT: Oh shut up Sam. I you better watch it or I'll take you out of my story!
SAM whimpers while holding FRODO.
SAM: You won't let her take me... right Mister Frodo?
FRODO gives SAM an odd look then nods in agreement.
DARTH FLIRT: Eww... Anyways... Back to the story! I've finally thought of a plot!
A brillant light appears and DARTH FLIRT disappears.
EMPEROR PALPATINE: Well.. Thanks to an idea from that attractive Darth Flirt, I have a quest for you!
DARTH FLIRT (from the clouds above the stadium): Eww... He thinks I'm hot...
DARTH FLIRT zapps EMPEROR PALPATINE with the staff she stole from GANDALF.
EMPEROR PALPATINE: Ow...
GANDALF: So that's what happened to my staff...
DARTH FLIRT: You can do the rest Emperor of Rome...
EMPEROR OF ROME: Ok, thanks! Now... Where was he.. I have devised a quest for you go on! You must get my sister to sleep with me!
DARTH FLIRT: Hey! That wasn't the plan!
EMPEROR OF ROME: It wasn't?
DARTH FLIRT: No! That's worse then Emperor Palpatine thinking I'm hot! Wait.. Nothing is worse then that... Oh well.. You'll still pay for your over grossness... Here... Go stick this fork in that socket over there.
EMPEROR OF ROME: Ok!
EMPEROR OF ROME walks over to socket and puts the fork in it. EMPEROR OF ROME gets zapped.
DARTH FLIRT: Heh heh heh... Umm.. Now who will continue the plot... Hmm... Oh! I got it!
The DIGIMON EMPEROR appears out of nowhere in the same spot as the EMPEROR OF ROME was standing.
DIGIMON EMPEROR: Ok, here is your Quest... You must find the Golden Digi-Fleece so I can use it to take over the Digital World!
The DIGIMON EMPEROR laughs manically.
ALL: ...
DIGIMON EMPEROR: Yes... Anyways.. Some of you will be assigned to be in the "Fellowship of the Golden Sheep Skin"
P. LEIA: Golden Sheep Skin? Couldn't you think of a better name?
DIGIMON EMPEROR: I didn't think of it! Darth Flirt did!
DARTH FLIRT: Do you have a problem with my name of the fellowship?
P. LEIA: Well.. Yea..
DARTH FLIRT: Well.. You just ended your time in this fic...
DARTH FLIRT shoots P. LEIA with the bow and arrows she stole from LEGOLAS.
LEGOLAS: Hey! Give those back!
DARTH FLIRT: Shut up gay elf-boy! Or you're next!
LEGOLAS whimpers and backs off into a corner. Most of DARTH FLIRT'S FRIENDS go to comfort him.
DIGIMON EMPEROR: Anyways... The Fellowship will consist of Frodo Baggins...
FRODO: Aww crap.. not another one..
DIGIMON EMPEROR: ...Samwise Gamgee...
SAM: Wohoo! Mister Frodo! I get to come along too!
FRODO: Aww crap.. not again..
DIGIMON EMPEROR: ...Ikki and his Medabot Metabee..
IKKI: How did I get pulled into this?
DIGIMON EMPEROR: ...TK and his digimon Patamon...
TK looks up to see DARTH FLIRT wave at him playfully. TK shudders.
DIGIMON EMPEROR: ...Takato and his digimon Guilmon...
GUILMON: Will there be peanutbutter there?
DARTH FLIRT glares evily at GUILMON. GUILMON whimpers and hides in a corner.
DIGIMON EMPEROR: ...Ash and all of his Pokemon...
PIKACHU: Pika! Pika-pikachu!
ASH: Does anyone know what he's saying?
TK: Aren't you supposed to know?
ASH: Umm....
ASH runs into the corner crying. PIKACHU follows to comfort him. GUILMON tries to go too, but TAKATO makes him stop.
TAKATO: No Digimon of MINE is going to comfort pokemon scum..
ASH cries some more.
DIGIMON EMPEROR: ...Lord Farquaad...
LORD FARQUAAD: Yes! It's me! Bow before me!
ALL look at LORD FARQUAAD. ALL start to laugh at his vertically challenged-ness.
DIGIMON EMPEROR: ...Luke Skywalker...
LUKE SKYWALKER: Wohoo! Some one loves me up there!
DARTH FLIRT: Umm... No, your wrong... I just needed someone to kill Boromir style!
LUKE SKYWALKER starts to cry like a little baby.
DIGIMON EMPEROR: ...and finally Jar Jar Binks.
ALL look evily at JAR JAR BINKS.
JAR JAR: Mesa here to get dat sheep!
ALL start to gangbeat JAR JAR BINKS to in a small bleeding corpse.
JAR JAR: Mesa going bye bye now...
JAR JAR slowly crawl out of the stadium. ALL laugh at him as he leaves.
DIGIMON EMPEROR: Well.. Since Jar Jar Binks was rejected... We'll have to go to the spare, Natalie Portman!
DARTH FLIRT: NEVER!! I HATE YOU NATALIE PORTMAN!! NO ONE KISSES HAYDEN CHRISTENSEN UNLESS IT'S ME!!
DARTH FLIRT throws some of Zeus's lightning blots (conviently bought from Ebay) at NATALIE PORTMAN and zaps her into oblivion. DARTH FLIRT then hugs a picture of Hayden Christensen.
DIGIMON EMPEROR: Hey! That was not called for! Who is going to replace her now?
DARTH FLIRT: Umm... How about Heath Leadger? I can think of many amusing ways to kill him!
DIGIMON EMPEROR: Ok! Heath Ledger it is!
HEATH: What! How could you want to kill me?!
DARTH FLIRT: Oh come on! I'm sure ANYONE could answer that question!
ALL (except HEATH and SAM) nodd in unison.
HEATH goes off to cry in the corner with ASH. SAM goes to comfort him, but is distracted by FRODO bending over to pick up a bug.
DIGIMON EMPEROR: Well.. Now you must go on your journey! I wish you all good luck!