Author's Note: Now it's *2:00* in the morning and I *still* can't sleep! I closed up my computer at 1:30 and headed for bed but then ended up doing the tossy-turny-rumple-the-fresh-sheets dealy and... Ta-da! Here I am, back for more! I hope you are too...

Part III: Who Knocketh My Door?

*Someone's pounding on the door right now... Good for them* Dawn Summers, former Mystical Ball of Energy Key Thingy, thought to herself. Proud that she actually -had- a thought, she snuggled back down into the couch. *Hey look! Old crusty food that I found in the cracks of our even older and crustier couch! I wonder if it still is flavorful...* That makes -two- thoughts... And within seconds of the first! Surely this called for some celebratory sulking... Right? I mean, isn't that what Dawn's main purpose is? To sulk and be vapid and self-absorbed and create unnecessary conflict for her poor older sister who was violently wrenched out of Heaven and make Earth Hell for her? Isn't that her purpose?!

The door was still being pounded... Upon.

Rolling her eyes and tossing her long, silky hair-- THE HAIR BECAME ALIVE AND STARTED CHOKING DAWN RIGHT IN HER OWN LIVING ROOM!! THE HORRORS, THE HORRORS, THE HORR--- Must be Tuesday.

Coughing slightly in embarrassment, Dawn straightened out her whorish clothing and answered the door to see...

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A/N: Wow! This chapter is where the plot REALLY gets going!!! Can't you tell? I had my mom help me with the bigger words (Shhh... I don't want people to know that I don't know how to spell "K-E-Y") so it looks like I'm smarter. Teehee!

And I gotta say... I'm BOMB at the cliffhangers! Woo! On a rooooooll!

PLZ don't forget to review! Or I'll come after you! And make you smell like poo! And hit you with a shoe! That's what I'll do! (Hehe, I can RHYME!)

Part IV: Haven't We Already Done This Bit?

"OMG! It's Spike!!!!" Dawn fainted, but not before noticing that he was standing outside in the (ok, brace yourselves...) SUNLIGHT!

Spike looked around nervously for a while before hightailing it out of there... HE JUST KILLED THE SLAYER'S LITTLE SISTER!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!

Buffy answered the door (as she was meant to.. See last chapter) and wasn't awarded the privilege of passing out in front of Spike. The Not-Burning-In-The-Sun Spike, that is. Instead, she looked down at her sister and sighed as Dawn's hair tried to choke her again.

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Spike's door to his crypt flew open. BANG! He jumped at least 10 feet in the air, doing a Matrix midair and turning to face the door.

"OMG!" he screamed in a high-pitched voice, "It's the SLAYER! And I KILLED HER SISTER!!" Buffy scowled.

"Dude," she replied, "Wouldja stop speaking in CAPS, Spike? Giving me a headache here.... Just like the kind I came to inflict on YOU!" She launched herself at him, justifying her anger by the fact that Spike had screwed up and done the same scene two times in a row, only Dawn didn't realize this and had answered the door before Buffy could, thereby messing with the whole order of life! *Collective gasp!*

They wrestled each other against the cold floor of the crypt until they tumbled down the steep ladder, into the lower level, and landed on the bed in one smooth swoop. Suddenly they were kissing and....

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A/N: Sorry, it started getting a little heated here and my mommy said I shouldn't go above G in this fic... So if you want all the nasty details, go to my related site: www.SpikeAndBuffyGetItOnInNastyGratifyingWays.com. It's just a short insert for the chapter. Teehee! PLZ keep reading and reviewing!!

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...And suddenly there was sunshine and happiness for all and the world had yet again been saved by another lame apocalypse that no one even knew about in the first place.

TBC.... teehee!!

Author's Note: I don't even think this "chapter" made sense to -me-! Oh well. The way I figure, people don't want other people to know that they don't understand something... So instead of acting confused, you dumb idiots will laugh your asses off thinking it's the funniest thing you've ever read.

...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

...

Wow, I'm tired.

...

Next "chapter" I think I'll start addressing the rest of the Scoobies and their lives Post-Grave.