Author's Note: This fic seems to have stopped being a fic-parody and more of a "silliness ensues" kinda story... I actually have a couple more points to pick on and then I'll probably wrap it up. There are a bunch of different things to satire, too, so I might be doing more of these just as a fun

exercise.

Yes, I'm aware there *are* good Post-Grave fics out there, too... But c'mon guys; you know as well as I do that this place is practically swarming with the same plot line. I should know-- I wrote my own about a month -before- the season finale happened. Certain spoilers are very correct, apparently.

If you want to appease your sense of wounded pride, please, by all means, read my own (unfortunately) serious Post-Grave fic entitled "Reality." I believe it was my first ever and Boy Howdy... It shows. ::shudders::

*Ahem* Now, onto our show...

Part VIII: ...The More They Stay Different

"Why do people call souls 'shiny,' Sp--Er, Rolando?" Buffy asked. They were sitting outside in the SUNLIGHT!! on the lawn of Xander's apartment complex. In some really weird, uncharacteristic moment of politeness, Rolando had suggested they leave the drunkard alone for a bit.

"Why? `M not sure, love."

Buffy pondered. It was very difficult... The wheels in her head were quite rusty. A bus drove by, full of children singing "The wheels in Buffy's head go SCRAPE SCRAPE CRRRRRRRRRACK!" She glared at them, a look full of Slayer-Power. The bus vanished.

"How do they know it's not.. You know... Shimmery? Or twinkling?" Buffy glared at another bus as it began to sing "Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star."

Rolando grinned. That was his Slayer. Always thinking.

"Well, love... I like to call you 'love,' by the way... I believe that it's called shiny `cause--" Rolando's revealing statement was cut off by Dawn, the Once-Mystical-Key-Now-Self-Absorbed-Brat-Teenager-Kleptomaniac, who launched herself from the tree they were resting under.

"I HATE YOU, I HATE YOU.... IIIIIII HAAAAAAAAAAATEEEEEE YOOOOOOU!!!!" Buffy and Rolando blinked... Like fishies (Oh man, I still wish you could see this AWESOME fish face I'm doing... teehee!!).

"Dawn? I don't understand," Rolando began hesitantly as her older sister extracted the OMKNSABTK from his neck. "I came all the way back here to show you that I've *changed* and how much I love you and your sister... Why are you mad? I just don't understand. Please help me, I'm a horrible hybrid of Americanism and Brits. It's not very conducive to making a smart person, you know..."

Dawn glared. A steel glare. Steely glare she glared. She glared very hard and steelily... GLARE AT ROLANDO!

"You left us! Just like everyone else I've ever known! No one wants to be around me! I'm GLAD that we're all stuck in this house, because how else can I get anyone to spend time with me?!" An employee of BtVS, the show, ran up to OMKNSABTK and began to whisper in the ear. Because this is an omniscient narrated story, the readers are privy to the whispers.

"Michelle... Wrong ep. I suggest you get *unstuck* from mid-season-six and join us in this little Post-Grave world... Alright?" Michelle nodded. No, Dawn nodded... No! ...I don't know.

Dawn sat down to join in on the picnic (which was suddenly there) and had a very pleasant time hearing ALL about Spike's journey to Africa... Which, apparently, he actually rode his stolen motorcycle ALL the way across the country AND the Atlantic Ocean. Dawn appeared very interested... Until her hair began to choke her again.

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The Spike-like figure in the DARK CAVE sat moodily in the back, glaring at the lightened opening. Damn that sun. Seeing as how he was a master vampire who had been alive hundreds and hundreds of years, the Spike-alike knew that the sun was not good for him. At the present moment, he couldn't seem to remember exactly *why*... But it would come to him soon.

As it was, the extra time he had stuck in the cave simply allowed him to plan his evil plan until it was planned to planning perfection! All that planning made him hungry, but he feasted on a random bystander... Who just happened to be wandering helplessly in a cave full of darkness... Alone...

And there was a collective gasp *gasp!* from the audience when they realized something was terribly, terribly wrong...

The Spike-Alike had no CHIP!

TBC!!!!!!!!! (That means "To Be Continued" for those of you who aren't quite up to speed with the rest of the world!)

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A/N: OK! Tell me watcha think! So far I've heard a million, gaZILLION people tell me that it's the best fic they've EVER read!! I'm so proud of all the hard work that goes into this. I'd like to thank all my betas who are good enough to point out all the errors... I HATE YOU! YOU'RE HORRIBLE BETAS AND YOU'RE FIRED! *FIRED!*

Teehee?

Author's Note: Thanks to everyone that actually reviewed this, but even more to those who took the time to read the humble beginnings to Vengeance Is Thy Name.