A/N: Here's Chapter One, minna! Oh, I'm really excited about this fic, so
please read on! Oh, yeah, I'm not an english expert, so don't expect
perfect grammar in some cases. ^^; Oh yeah... reviews are very welcome!
Chapter One: Repetition
"Look at him... he doesn't seem like his cheery self anymore..." "Yeah... I also felt sad when Sayo died... I wish we could help him out..." "Maybe, it's better not to meddle in his affairs... It's his own business; we have nothing to do about this. It's up to him whether he'll accept this or he'll move on.."
Those murmurs belonged to the trio talking about me. Again I was caught off guard. I didn't know what to respond, so I just kept silent. Sayo's death is still fresh in my mind... It can't be forgotten too easily... Again, questions raced in my mind about her... I looked up after staring at the ground for the third time this night. "Another one, please..." "Sanosuke, daijobu ka?" Kaoru asked. "Hai, hai!" I forced a smile. I don't want them to be worried about me... "Oh yeah, Sanosuke, what are you going to do now, after what happened to Shogou and the others?" Yahiko piped in, disturbing my thoughts. "Mochiron, what else? Hah! Follow the gang! What were you thinking?" "Well," he immitated an official's look, "I just thought you were going to wake up and try to find a job..." "Do you think I'll fall for those words? After a couple of years, say..." "Hmph... just as I thought..." I drank my sake deeply, all in one gulp. "I'm still Sagara Sanosuke, whatever you think. And yeah, I am now thinking what people would think if they see me in the market, carrying barrels of wheat, or sacks of rice. I'm not like that, you know? It's not in my nature..." I sniggered. Laughter rang in the restaurant as the 'humorous' side of me woke up again despite the loneliness and hopelessness that still remained in me.
"Saa... We better go home now... It's getting late. You, too Sano. Enough sake. Ah, Tsubame, arigatou for the sake!" Kaoru said as Tsubame stood infront of our stall. "Arigato gozaimasu, minna. Oyasumi!" She bid us good night politely. We stood up, payed the bill and left the place to go back to our own refuge.
"Oyasumi, minna! Sayonara!" I said as I turned my back from them. "Oyasumi, Sanosuke! Sayonara!" They said back.
* * *
As I walked alone back to my place under the smiling, silver moon in the middle of the velvet black sky, acompanied by winking stars, I thought of her again. I went back to my thoughts as if I was not disturbed, as if we were not talking a while ago.
Sayo... why do you have to die? If I were just a person who know something-- even little--about medicine... I could have saved you... Why is fate like this? I wish I never met you, so that I won't be suffering like this... I pretend to smile infront of others so that they won't be too anxious about me... I wish you'd be back here with me, as long as I want so that I could know you more, and return all the kindness you've given me by giving you what you deserve... love...
I wish you're still here... then I won't be pretending everything's alright.. I won't be pretending I'm alright...
Sayo... please come back...
* * *
Evening came and went... Darkness was then replaced by light as the sun revealed itself behind the mountains. I woke up from a deep slumber, free from any nightmares or figures of Sayo... Weird. I kinda feel too relaxed after I slumped into my futon last night. First time in days.... Hmmm... might be the after-effect of minimum amount of sake. I dressed up and decided to take a walk before I go to Kaoru's dojo for a breakfast. No, I changed my mind... I'll just go to Megumi's house. I'll have a decent meal when I'm in her place. I have a hundred percent assurance that I'll get a stomachache if I'm going to a wrong place, like Kaoru's. I opened the sliding door of my house and sunlight hit my eyes like lance slashing a tree in half. Instantly, I shut my eyes closed and after a while, squinted and face upward to look at the sky. What a beautiful day... The fluffy clouds are afloat in the endless blue sky, implying that it will be a fair day... I inhaled the spring air: pure--without a stench of rotten fish or any uncollected garbage. While I was walking under the pricking heat of the sun, my stomach grumbled angrily.. 'Damn... I need to eat... Gotta go to Megumi's house... Hmmm... I wonder what she's doing now... I hope she prepares a healthy meal...' Just as I was thinking about what meal she might be preparing, a teen bumped unto me, but unfortunately, she bounced back and was about to fall to the ground. Luckily, I caught her just in time, before she hit her head on the hard ground. She quickly broke off and stood up, like she was either embarrassed or she was just in a hurry. "A-- gomen nasai..." she regained her composure and bowed her head, apologizing; her brown bangs hiding her eyes from my view. "Iie.. never mind that..." I replied. There was an awkward silence as we were both speechless at the moment. "HEY! QUICKLY! THERE SHE IS! HURRY, BEFORE SHE GETS AWAY!!!!" Hmmm, it looks like she is being followed and chased for a reason unknown to me. But anyway, I could just practice on them.. I've not yet done any exercise. She looked behind her and then back to me. "..Arigato," she quickly responded. And with that, she ran away as fast as she could to acquire a distance between her and her chasers. Unknowingly, she didn't notice she dropped something and it looks like that was the reason she was being chased. Men from the government chased her and just passed by me. It seems like they didn't even notice me. Anyway, it's a good way to start a day without getting involved in a fight. Yep, a nice idea. I bent down and looked at the thing that she carelessly dropped. Before I could even hold it close to my eyes, it seems like--no, it really is-- I've seen this before... It's a pendant from the necklace of Christians--just like the one Sayo has...! I picked it up, then at last held it in an eye-level. Yes, it's really true. And that means... Wait a minute, that means, they are after her because she's a Christian...! I quickly ran towards the direction they took. No, I can't let anything like this happen again. For God's sake, why do we have to fight because of certain reasons, such as this? Don't they know that they are just destroying others' lives? Kuso...! Why can't we just respect each other's religion or belief? Shimatta!
'Just in time,' I thought. I saw, at the end of the road, four men holding her off. I hid in the cluster of bush near enough them to hear the conversation (if you could call that conversation..). "What do you want?!" She asked, defiantly. The teen's voice was determined but, there was a tinge of fear in it. "We want you to tell the truth. You're a Christian aren't you?" One of them asked. "So, what if I am?" She replied in the same tone. "Don't you know it is punishable by law?" "What do I care? You don't have to convince me it's wrong! That is what I believe in! You may kill me, but you can never get my faith away from me!" She was now struggling to get free. I spoke from behind a tree near them, hidden in the shadows. "Doesn't her words convincing just yet? And why would you kill a teen like her? What if her religion is not like ours? We have the right to believe in whatever we think is a way to liberate us from burdens. Why can't you respect her belief?" "Who are you?" One of them demanded. I stepped out from my hiding place and introuced myself, "Sagara Sanosuke." "It's you..." Those words issued from her lips. "Let her go," I demanded. No response came from them, except an order, "CHARGE!!!!" "Careless gits..." All four of them charged me at once and left the girl unguarded. They released their swords from each of their sheaths and continued to run towards me. However, before they even made their swords slash my skin, they were just helpless lumps on the ground. Few punches could make them forget who they are, though temporarily. They will have about three broken bones in the ribs, and a fracture on the arm. If they are lucky enough, they should have a shattered hand.
That was too easy.
I looked towards the girl then walked towards her direction. As I looked at her, it seems like I saw her before. I mean, before she bumped unto me in the marketplace. She resembles somebody, though I don't know who at the moment. When I reached her, I handed her the pendant, "Here, it's yours, isn't it?" I never expected it, but instead of thanking me, I was rewarded a spank in my right cheek, which made it turn in a violent shade of red. "Oowww.... What did you do that for? You should be thanking me instead of hitting me." That was really unexpected. And that hurts... "Even so! You should not have fought them back!" "If I didn't fight them you should be in prison right now, or, most probably, you're hanged to death or crucified in a cross." "I don't care! I don't believe in violence as a way to solving problems! It's not right to hurt somebody just because you need to." "......" "Now, do you understand? But, anyway, I thank you for doing it, though I hope you won't do it again. Violence is not the answer to your questions." And with that, she went away and helped the wounded men. There was nothing more I could do at the moment, so it's better to walk away now. Away from humiliation... I stole a glance at her before I completely turned my back and walked away. She still forgave those people though they could have done something that might have resulted to her death.
This event is familiar... As I thought about it and recalled some events in the past, it was matched to something that is impossible to be repeated-- the day I met Sayo, also known as Lady Magdala. The same events happened in the past, though I didn't meet Sayo in the marketplace. But she spanked me, just like what Sayo did. She was also confronted by four men and was just the same with Sayo... And the pendant-- 'Oh no... I forgot to return it to her!' This is getting weird by the minute... Are the events just modified but repeated itself involving me and the girl? Masaka...
I stopped infront of the Kamiya dojo, the least place I wanted to be in. I didn't know where my feet were taking me, but here I am. 'Oh no...' I thought. I wish to retreat, but Yahiko saw me, for the front gate was left open. "Ohayou, Sanosuke!" He greeted me. This young kid looked at me intently and asked, "What happened?" "What do you mean, 'what happened'?" "I mean, you should have been already bragging about what to eat right now, and you aren't. Did something happen?" 'This boy is so nosy...' I thought. I was thinking if I would answer his question, but I think it's not the right time. "No, nothing happened, except the fact that this is not the place I wanted to be in. See, I was expecting to go Megumi's place to have a decent breakfast, but beacuse of-- " "Aha! So, something did happen! C'mon, why don't you tell me? You could trust me, than Kaoru," he promptly said. Well, I had no choice but to do so. "Well, someone bumped unto me this morning in the marketplace. Then, she was confronted by four men from the government and she dropped this," I showed the pendant to him and he commented before I could even speak again. "It belongs to a Christian, right? I thought they were already exiled in Holland? Why is there a Christian still in this place?" "I don't know, Yahiko. But, something weird happened..." "What? What is it?" He excitedly asked. I looked at him in disbelief. He seemed so excited about this, more than I do. "You weren't there, so you won't know... But, the same thing happened when I met Sayo... I mean, Sayo was confronted with four men, the same with that girl; Sayo slapped me in the face, and you know what that girl did? She did the same! And another thing, she dropped this, and again, I forgot to return this to her... the same thing I forgot to return to Sayo..." "Hmm... You're right... that sounded weird..." Kaoru nodded beside Yahiko. "What are you doing here?!" A startled Yahiko asked. "You aren't supposed to be meddling in guy talks, you know." And with that, he was rewarded a smack on the head by a fuming Kaoru. I then nodded in agreement. "Though there are some things you might understand about the talk, you should have gave warning that you'd come here. Or a better way, you should not have just walked in and gave your comment about what happened." A slap. Then another. And another. I was slapped again and again by this furious Kamiya dojo owner, which resulted to my cheeks being in the state of real torture. "That's no way to treat a lady! Such words! I only came here to ask where Kenshin is, but I heard your conversation, so I thought I'll snoop in for a while. But, really," she said as she left both of us (Yahiko and I) sprawled on the ground because of what she did. "It's a weird thing. Unusual... How could have that happened? Could that girl be somehow related to Sayo?" With those words, I sat beside Yahiko and asked her about it. "You think so? I mean, are you assuming that that girl is related to Sayo?" "Well, yeah... sort of. But I may be wrong about that thing. But still, it might be used as a clue to her real identity. Oh, yeah! Why don't you invite her here and she might become another student of the Kamiya dojo!" 'She looked so excited about this girl...' I thought. "Hey, I don't even know where she lives! And I might not be able to see her again, because she just bumped unto me this morning." "Oh no, you don't... Tee-hee, you have that pendant with you, don't you? Don't you have any intention to return it to her?" Her eyes glinted with mischievousness. "Hey, it's none of your business..." I think she got me... "Well, okay... I won't force you if you don't want to. But, actually," she stood up and went the other way, "it's an act of stealing, if you won't be able to return that to her." She said firmly. 'Kuso...!' I thought. 'She really got me this time. It's like I have no intention to return this, but I wanted to do it in my own way. What she's asking me is more than enough. She wanted me to look for that girl and let her be her student. Man, isn't she asking much?' I stood up and got ready to leave the dojo. "Aren't you going to eat first?" Kaoru asked. "No, I don't need any food of yours. I prefer the fox-lady's. I might just be rushing back to the benjo once I taste the food you will give me." "Why you--!" She exclaimed as she tried to get me and whack me with her bokken, but was held off by Yahiko. "And yeah, it's up to me whether I am going to return this to her or not. And if I do, it's up to her if she wanted to be your student or not. I'm not going to follow your order just because you told me so. Ja!" I explained. Those words didn't stop her from being outraged. I shrugged her reactions off. And before I look for that girl, I need something to fill me up. "Ohayou, Sanosuke," Kenshin greeted me as I met him in going out the dojo. "Ja!" I greeted him back. It might be a harsh thing to say, but I really need to eat right now. This unnatural craving for too much food is killing me. And a place away from them is a good idea. I don't want to dine with them while talking about that girl. I continued to trod towards Megumi's place, leaving Kenshin wondering what was the matter with me.
Once the dojo was out of the vision, I rounded the corner to Megumi's residence. At once, when the children saw me, they ran towards me and led me inside. "Ohayou, Sanosuke," Gensai-san greeted me. "You're just in time. Join us." "Arigato, Gensai-san," I said as I sat down and ate with them. "Is Megumi there?" "What is it that you want?" She demanded. "Whow... slow down. You don't need to be that demanding. I won't borrow money from you, don't worry. I was just going to ask whether you know someone of different religion from us that is still here in Japan. Do you know someone who's a Christian here?" I asked her. "A Christian? I thought they were exiled in Holland just a few weeks ago..." Gensai-san told me, then he returned to feeding his grandchildren. "Yes, they were," I replied. "Why are you asking? Did you come here just to talk about this? I don't know anyone here having such religion." "Hey, I was just confirming. I thought.." I trailed off as I munched a sushi, "you knew someone of that sort. I mean, if she's working with you, or something..." "She?" Megumi asked. "Yes, 'she'... I was just assuming, that when that girl bumped onto me this morning in the marketplace, she was a Christian. She had this pendant she dropped, see.." "Oh, I see. Well, maybe you could just see her in the market, or trodding down the street, or maybe, you could just meet her again if she'll bump onto you," "Yeah, right. Thanks for the idea, Megumi." I said sarcastically. However, she missed the sarcasm I gave her. After I finished my meal, I bid goodbye and thanked them for the nice meal. "Arigato, Megumi-san, Gensai-san. Ja!"
* * *
Her real identity is concealed right now. I don't know a thing about her, but her actions made me yearn to know her more. It's like I've met her before, but it's blurry... But whatever I do, all I have to do is wait. I can't just rush things. Now, I need time to think about it, and since she don't know me yet, it's better to lay-low for a while...
As I went home after a rather tiring day, I can't stop thinking about her features... She had dark brown hair, unlike Sayo's and that hair was about the same length as Sayo's... Sayo, Sayo, Sayo.. You're really different from her. From the way she looked, it seems like she is in her late teens and probably eighteen or nineteen. Though there is a great difference in their external appearance, they share the same trait, excluding the fact that they may have the same religion... they also share an extraordimary aura that soothes me, but in one way or another, reminds me of a miserable event in my life. But that aura makes you feel like there is still hope, though the ones important to you have already gone into the other world they call Paradise. Though they have the same trait, they are competitive, although not in a sense that they can fight. They are both "harsh" in a way, for these humans slapped me instead of thanking me in the first place. But now, all I can do is smile inwardly of the thing both of them did to me. I sighed inwardly. True, I can't bring Sayo back... but is this girl a "replacement" for her? But what am I going to do if she is? ...That can never happen. There's only one Sayo, and no one could ever replace her. No one.
I lied in my futon and held the pendant in my eyes, just few inches away from my face. It was still with me, for I didn't see any sign of her the whole day. Again, I sighed, this time audibly. When can I see her again? Where can I see her again? How am I going to see her again? If I do, what would I say? 'Do you know Amakusa Sayo?' No, maybe not. It's a lame question... It's like I'm looking for somebody who's like a needle in the midst of wheat and grass... As I thought about it more, thoughts circled my head which only meant one thing-- I really want to know her. "Who are you?" I whispered in the still night air before I drifted off to sleep. No one was able to answer me at the moment, but the cool night wind whispered something back to me....
* * *
Morning came and went the darkness... Another day of struggle; another day of business... I then went to the town hoping to meet that girl again. She really had the familiar aura that made me recall certain things about Sayo... I then had this weird and very unbelieveable idea that she's another sibling of Sayo... As I passed by the small bridge while going to the town, I saw someone quite familiar, staring to the river and then drawing in a thing that seemed like a thick book. It was that girl. It was funny to view her like this... No, it wasn't funny. What I mean is that it's somehow peaceful and entertaining at the same time. I went down the bridge and went to her place. Sneakily, hoping that she won't feel my presence, I stopped behind her and looked at what she was doing... It startled me as I saw what was keeping her busy. It was like a picture.. like the scenario was cut by an invisible hand and pasted perfectly to the paper she was drawing on. It really was a perfectly done masterpiece. Just as she was about to add the final touch to her piece, she quickly stopped and looked behind her, spotting me. She quickly hid the paper she was holding and inserted it to a book she had along with her. "What are you doing here?" She asked, though rather in a small voice. She was obviously astonished by my presence, and it really is evident that she didn't feel me earlier; she was too busy with her work and didn't pay too much attention to her surroundings. "I was just intrigued by your actions as I've seen you over the bridge, so I decided I'd like to see what you were doing which seemed like it required a deep concentration. But, since I've seen what kept you so serious, I'll just return this to you. I'm sorry if I forgot to to do so yesterday." I then handed the pendant back to her. She received it and said, "Thank you... I thought I wouldn't see it again... You're that man, aren't you? You're Sagara Sanosuke-kun, right?" "You may call me Sanosuke, if you want to. By the way, may I know your name?" I asked. Man, am I too straightforward? She smiled and answered the question asked of her, "Magdala," "Chotto matte... is that your real name?" "Of course it is. I was baptised having that name." She stood silent for a while, then sat on the grass, staring at the river. "Do you remember someone having that name? To tell you the truth, since the day you helped me with those men, I feel like I've known you before; like I've seen you before... I mean, before I bumped into you the yesterday." "Yes... I remember someone having that name. And the same as mine... I feel like you're somebody I knew before..." Silence. As I was thinking about what I have said, I laughed at it. I literally did so. It was funny I said those words in front of her. But, as I heard her laugh with me, I thought she might be thinking the same way. It died down, after a quite a long time, which made me and her quite breathless. "You know, I've never laughed like this in my life after my parents died. I was left alone and I now sell these pieces to earn money. I don't have permanent source of income, see. But I use my ability to live. No one would accept me, because if they find out that I do not believe in Shintoism, they are afraid that the government will come after them and arrest them with me. I don't want that thing to happen, so I live by myself." She paused for a while, then continued, "How about you? Do you have any family?" "No. They already died since I was a kid. But, during my childhood, I became a member of Sekiho Tai, the anti-Shogunate group. There, I met the person I considered my father, who treated me like I was his own. We were like a family at that time, but since that was ten years ago, still in the Shogu era, people who work for the government kill those who are against them. The person I considered my father, who was the leader of the group, was killed by beheading him. He threw me into the river and I witnessed his death. Since then, I lived a life of revenge, but also helping people those who are in need of it." As I was telling her my past, she said, "Is that the reason you are not too sure about what you feel?" I was startled of her response, but I replied, "Yes." I didn't know what to respond at her. But, I guess that's true. "It's pretty sad to think that we don't have any family left here with us. However, I believe that they are happy and contented now. I wish I could see them again..." she sighed beside me. "Do you feel empty without them?" I asked. "Yes, though not too often. I believe that they are still watching me from above. I just think that it's not right to seclude myself away from others just because they left me. I now that it might be hard to accept it at first, but I need to live, to survive, even though I sometimes feel like I am alone in the world." "Yeah... I think you're right. Hey, if ever you feel like you're alone, don't be... you could count on me, and you may see me anytime you want." "Are you suggesting that we become friends?" I laughed. "You got me there. So, can we?" She thought hard for a while, like she was having doubts whether she'd be my friend or not. "Of course! Why not? At least I won't be alone--literally." "I forgot.. You live alone, right?" "Yes, I do." "Where do you stay? Do you have any place you stay in?" "Yesterday, I had one. But now, it's gone. I mean, I stayed in a teacher's house as her servant, but when she found out my status as a Christian, she told me I better get out of this place, because I am in danger. She was a very kind person. She even gave me a few pieces of paper and a couple of charcoal pencil to use for a source of income. Even when I was working for her and her children, I was submitting my works to a shop nearby and if ever someone would buy it, the owner of that shop will give me my part. I continued to do that habit, but up to now, though I have small fortune, I am still not safe. And now, I am wondering where I would stay..." She told me. With that, an idea came in my mind that she could just come with me to my house. But, I thought it's not quite right to do so. I don't want her to go to Kaoru's dojo because she might just be bombarded with questions... But with Megumi's house, I wouldn't know, she might just be arrested without me knowing it. Not that I don't trust her... but, just to be sure... "Um, you could--" I was cut off by running policemen from afar towards our direction. 'Kuso! Why can't they turn up in another while? They always butt in without timing!' "Magdala, we need to go. People are looking for you again." I said, as I stood up. "Where are we going?" I thought for a while.. 'My house is definitely far from here. Megumi's not in her house right now... And it's farther than mine. So I have no choice but to go to-- "Kaoru's dojo. That place is quite near here. Past the sakura trees." She stood up, picked up her book and her materials with her and nodded her head. "Arigato, Sanosuke." "C'mon." I ran towards the Kamiya dojo and she followed my lead. I glanced at her, behind me, and I noticed that her pace is quite slow. Now, I'm having doubts whether she's still going to make it. Halfway towards the dojo, I felt her stop behind me. I turned to her and saw that her pale flesh is now flushed and she was perspiring. I ran towards her just as she was about to fall, yet again; I caught her just in time. There was no other choice but to carry her towards the dojo. We were still followed, though we acquired certain distance from them. I carried her in my back, just what I did to Sayo. 'This event is getting weirder by the minute...' I thought. I just want to keep her from those guys, and then, I'll try to ask her who she really is. I could hear her shallow breaths issuing from her mouth. I wonder what was wrong with her. I hope she wouldn't end up like Sayo... I can't afford to loose someone like her again. She might just be way for me to become more sure about what I feel.
After running for what seemed only just a few seconds, I reached the front gates of the dojo. I quickly opened them and got inside. People in this place just looked at me as I just entered without any warning. I had no more time to waste. I approached them and I asked for their help. "Kaoru, I need you to help me with her. She's the girl I'm talking about. Her chasers are about to reach us, so I need your help to hide her from them. I'll explain the details later." "What's the matter with her?" Kaoru asked with sincere concern for Magdala. "She just went weak after running," I responded. "Here, hand me to her. I'll help her out. Yahiko, help me prepare the room for her." "Arigato, Kaoru." Kaoru and Yahiko then proceeded to the other room, leaving me and Kenshin alone for a talk. "Sumimasen about what I acted the yesterday. I was really pissed off at that time." "Don't worry about it, it's okay." A pause, then, "Is something bothering you?" He asked me. Of course, it's hard to hide that when you're infront of an ex-battousai. I told him the reason, "Yeah... it's her. Strange things started to happen since yesterday, up to now. I don't know if I'm just dreaming, or something, but quite identical events occured to me, involving that girl. I don't know, I assume that it's like a repetition of things..." "Hmm.. it might be. But, do you feel something unusual about it? I mean, what if she's just a reincarnation of Sayo, or something?" "I don't know... but all I have to do now is to keep her away from them. Maybe, after a few days, I'll help her to get out of this place to another which will accept her without conditions. Who knows what would happen in the next few days?" "You're right. The best way to do now is to look after her and keep her away from trouble. If the condition's stable, you could do whatever you want for her own good." "Yeah..." Kaoru and Yahiko returned and joined our conversation. "Don't worry, she's already fine. She just needed to rest to relax those sore muscles. Oh yeah... why did you bring her here? I mean, you could bring her to Megumi for her to rest fully..." "Do you think I could reach her house quickly? We were in hot pursuit! And her house is farther than mine. What else do you want to expect from me? This dojo is nearer than any of our houses and I thought that the police won't be able to sense that she's here. I mean, they won't suspect you're hiding her for me." "Okay, okay.." "Hey, you told us that you were being chased, where are they now?" Yahiko piped in. "I don't know. Maybe they already gave up." "Why didn't you just fight them?" Kaoru asked. "I-- I can't. I can't show that to her again. She might just be disappointed, because she said she believed in non-violence. So, that's that. I can't fight them infront of her." "Okay, I see... Hey, Sano... do you have any fever? Is that you? Why so soft? Don't tell me that girl made you stop punching something..." Yahiko teased. "Well, you just said it... you want one? I'd be glad to give one just for you. I haven't practiced yet, you know? Maybe you really want to have one." I said as I cracked my knuckles. Laughter rang once more in the dojo. It was a thing to say... Really, I think Yahiko's right. Maybe Magdala influenced me not to use violence anymore... As soon as the laughter died down, Kaoru asked, yet again, "By the way, what's her name?" "I don't know whether you'll believe it or not, but she said her name was Magdala." "What?! Are you sure you heard it correctly?" Yahiko teased once more. "Yeah, you git. You won't believe me, then don't. I don't expect you to. You would just think it was all bluff. Then why don't you ask her yourself?" "Hey, I was just joking, you know? Why so hot so suddenly? Sheesh..." "Sanosuke, she bumped unto you yesterday, right?" "Yes... hey...! How did you know? Don't tell me--" I turned towards the two. "Yes, it was them..." Kenshin smiled at me. "Okay... I'll forgive you this time, but the next time you butt in in some conversations, you won't remember who you are for about a few hours." I addressed the two. "Don't you think she have a different purpose of coming here? What if she really is the reincarnation of Sayo?" Kenshin gave his thoughts. "You think so, Kenshin?" Kaoru asked. "I don't know. I'm just assuming, because for me, no person would just be able to meet someone by chance. What if it's really meant to be? Maybe Sayo wanted to tell you something, but was not able to, last time..." Silence prevailed in the four of us. 'What if it's really meant to be?' I repeated those words to myself. "It might just be...."
* * *
Night came and no disturbances occured. I asked if I could stay in the dojo today, I reasoned out, "I want to be with her for a while. I want to be with her if ever somone would like to attack her." They laughed at my reason and even teased me before they went to sleep. What kind of people are they? Anyway, I shrugged off their reactions, especially Kaoru's. It's a good thing Kenshin didn't do that also. I don't know what I'd be able to do then...
I sat near her futon as I looked at her. It was already late and I suppose, all the three of them are already asleep, unless they are spying on me. I was thinking, what if she's just Sayo's reincarnation, like what Kenshin said? What is her purpose, why did she come back? I decided to go out for a while, to look at the velvet sky. As I looked at it, the black sky imbeded by shining diamonds, I recall the moment Sayo treated my wounds. It was really surprising that she knew me-- I mean, who I really am--like I am short-tempered, I love fights, and so on. Did the gods hear my prayer? Why did she come back? Because you asked for it... A thought answered my question. I did... What do I feel right now? Gladness? Guilt? I don't know... I don't exactly know what I feel right now. I'm too unsure.
Just as I was just staring at the sky, I felt someone sit beside me. I turned to face that person and I saw Magdala. "What are you doing here?" I asked her. "I can't sleep... How about you?" She asked back. "Just the same." I answered casually. She looked towards the black velvet sky and said, "The stars are unusually bright tonight, aren't they? Did you notice?" "No... not actually. My mind was drifting off to somewhere else, but now I could see that," I smiled at myself. "You know, you could do that more often. It suits you, because on first look, you seem to engage anyone in a fight." "What do you mean I could do that more often? What, smile?" "Yep, that's it. You look too serious if you won't smile. And, maybe, Sayo would like that." The last four words that she uttered sank deeply after a few moments. It seemed inaudible at first, but once I internalized it, it seemed that she shouted them. "How did you know about Sayo? Is she your sibling? Another relative?" Silence. She didn't respond to my question, instead, she continued to stare at the sky. What does she have in mind right now? She's so calm, yet I am too troubled of her real identity now. I can't think of anything else to say to her... I want to hear something from her... The truth.. I want the truth. Minutes passed by quietly between us, but there were crickets who were playing their piece to add some sound in the environment surrounding us. I was taken aback as I just felt her lean her head on my shoulder. I thought she just fell asleep because of the stillness around us, but I was wrong. Though her dark brown hair hid her face, I could sense that she was gasping, although she was trying hard not to let me hear it. What I could hear now was like an incantation, unlike what I heard a moment ago. She was chanting something, like a prayer that only she could understand. Slowly, I felt her head slide down from my shoulder to my chest. She was silent, and I could not hear any gasping anymore, but just a normal breathing rate. I turned her around to face me and she really is asleep now. 'She fell asleep because it was too silent,' I thought. I stood up and carried her to the room she was in earlier.
As I laid her down back to the futon, a word escaped from her mouth which definitely caught my attention. "Sanosuke..." All I could do was smile at her, though she won't be able to see it. "Good night... Sayo..."
Chapter One: Repetition
"Look at him... he doesn't seem like his cheery self anymore..." "Yeah... I also felt sad when Sayo died... I wish we could help him out..." "Maybe, it's better not to meddle in his affairs... It's his own business; we have nothing to do about this. It's up to him whether he'll accept this or he'll move on.."
Those murmurs belonged to the trio talking about me. Again I was caught off guard. I didn't know what to respond, so I just kept silent. Sayo's death is still fresh in my mind... It can't be forgotten too easily... Again, questions raced in my mind about her... I looked up after staring at the ground for the third time this night. "Another one, please..." "Sanosuke, daijobu ka?" Kaoru asked. "Hai, hai!" I forced a smile. I don't want them to be worried about me... "Oh yeah, Sanosuke, what are you going to do now, after what happened to Shogou and the others?" Yahiko piped in, disturbing my thoughts. "Mochiron, what else? Hah! Follow the gang! What were you thinking?" "Well," he immitated an official's look, "I just thought you were going to wake up and try to find a job..." "Do you think I'll fall for those words? After a couple of years, say..." "Hmph... just as I thought..." I drank my sake deeply, all in one gulp. "I'm still Sagara Sanosuke, whatever you think. And yeah, I am now thinking what people would think if they see me in the market, carrying barrels of wheat, or sacks of rice. I'm not like that, you know? It's not in my nature..." I sniggered. Laughter rang in the restaurant as the 'humorous' side of me woke up again despite the loneliness and hopelessness that still remained in me.
"Saa... We better go home now... It's getting late. You, too Sano. Enough sake. Ah, Tsubame, arigatou for the sake!" Kaoru said as Tsubame stood infront of our stall. "Arigato gozaimasu, minna. Oyasumi!" She bid us good night politely. We stood up, payed the bill and left the place to go back to our own refuge.
"Oyasumi, minna! Sayonara!" I said as I turned my back from them. "Oyasumi, Sanosuke! Sayonara!" They said back.
* * *
As I walked alone back to my place under the smiling, silver moon in the middle of the velvet black sky, acompanied by winking stars, I thought of her again. I went back to my thoughts as if I was not disturbed, as if we were not talking a while ago.
Sayo... why do you have to die? If I were just a person who know something-- even little--about medicine... I could have saved you... Why is fate like this? I wish I never met you, so that I won't be suffering like this... I pretend to smile infront of others so that they won't be too anxious about me... I wish you'd be back here with me, as long as I want so that I could know you more, and return all the kindness you've given me by giving you what you deserve... love...
I wish you're still here... then I won't be pretending everything's alright.. I won't be pretending I'm alright...
Sayo... please come back...
* * *
Evening came and went... Darkness was then replaced by light as the sun revealed itself behind the mountains. I woke up from a deep slumber, free from any nightmares or figures of Sayo... Weird. I kinda feel too relaxed after I slumped into my futon last night. First time in days.... Hmmm... might be the after-effect of minimum amount of sake. I dressed up and decided to take a walk before I go to Kaoru's dojo for a breakfast. No, I changed my mind... I'll just go to Megumi's house. I'll have a decent meal when I'm in her place. I have a hundred percent assurance that I'll get a stomachache if I'm going to a wrong place, like Kaoru's. I opened the sliding door of my house and sunlight hit my eyes like lance slashing a tree in half. Instantly, I shut my eyes closed and after a while, squinted and face upward to look at the sky. What a beautiful day... The fluffy clouds are afloat in the endless blue sky, implying that it will be a fair day... I inhaled the spring air: pure--without a stench of rotten fish or any uncollected garbage. While I was walking under the pricking heat of the sun, my stomach grumbled angrily.. 'Damn... I need to eat... Gotta go to Megumi's house... Hmmm... I wonder what she's doing now... I hope she prepares a healthy meal...' Just as I was thinking about what meal she might be preparing, a teen bumped unto me, but unfortunately, she bounced back and was about to fall to the ground. Luckily, I caught her just in time, before she hit her head on the hard ground. She quickly broke off and stood up, like she was either embarrassed or she was just in a hurry. "A-- gomen nasai..." she regained her composure and bowed her head, apologizing; her brown bangs hiding her eyes from my view. "Iie.. never mind that..." I replied. There was an awkward silence as we were both speechless at the moment. "HEY! QUICKLY! THERE SHE IS! HURRY, BEFORE SHE GETS AWAY!!!!" Hmmm, it looks like she is being followed and chased for a reason unknown to me. But anyway, I could just practice on them.. I've not yet done any exercise. She looked behind her and then back to me. "..Arigato," she quickly responded. And with that, she ran away as fast as she could to acquire a distance between her and her chasers. Unknowingly, she didn't notice she dropped something and it looks like that was the reason she was being chased. Men from the government chased her and just passed by me. It seems like they didn't even notice me. Anyway, it's a good way to start a day without getting involved in a fight. Yep, a nice idea. I bent down and looked at the thing that she carelessly dropped. Before I could even hold it close to my eyes, it seems like--no, it really is-- I've seen this before... It's a pendant from the necklace of Christians--just like the one Sayo has...! I picked it up, then at last held it in an eye-level. Yes, it's really true. And that means... Wait a minute, that means, they are after her because she's a Christian...! I quickly ran towards the direction they took. No, I can't let anything like this happen again. For God's sake, why do we have to fight because of certain reasons, such as this? Don't they know that they are just destroying others' lives? Kuso...! Why can't we just respect each other's religion or belief? Shimatta!
'Just in time,' I thought. I saw, at the end of the road, four men holding her off. I hid in the cluster of bush near enough them to hear the conversation (if you could call that conversation..). "What do you want?!" She asked, defiantly. The teen's voice was determined but, there was a tinge of fear in it. "We want you to tell the truth. You're a Christian aren't you?" One of them asked. "So, what if I am?" She replied in the same tone. "Don't you know it is punishable by law?" "What do I care? You don't have to convince me it's wrong! That is what I believe in! You may kill me, but you can never get my faith away from me!" She was now struggling to get free. I spoke from behind a tree near them, hidden in the shadows. "Doesn't her words convincing just yet? And why would you kill a teen like her? What if her religion is not like ours? We have the right to believe in whatever we think is a way to liberate us from burdens. Why can't you respect her belief?" "Who are you?" One of them demanded. I stepped out from my hiding place and introuced myself, "Sagara Sanosuke." "It's you..." Those words issued from her lips. "Let her go," I demanded. No response came from them, except an order, "CHARGE!!!!" "Careless gits..." All four of them charged me at once and left the girl unguarded. They released their swords from each of their sheaths and continued to run towards me. However, before they even made their swords slash my skin, they were just helpless lumps on the ground. Few punches could make them forget who they are, though temporarily. They will have about three broken bones in the ribs, and a fracture on the arm. If they are lucky enough, they should have a shattered hand.
That was too easy.
I looked towards the girl then walked towards her direction. As I looked at her, it seems like I saw her before. I mean, before she bumped unto me in the marketplace. She resembles somebody, though I don't know who at the moment. When I reached her, I handed her the pendant, "Here, it's yours, isn't it?" I never expected it, but instead of thanking me, I was rewarded a spank in my right cheek, which made it turn in a violent shade of red. "Oowww.... What did you do that for? You should be thanking me instead of hitting me." That was really unexpected. And that hurts... "Even so! You should not have fought them back!" "If I didn't fight them you should be in prison right now, or, most probably, you're hanged to death or crucified in a cross." "I don't care! I don't believe in violence as a way to solving problems! It's not right to hurt somebody just because you need to." "......" "Now, do you understand? But, anyway, I thank you for doing it, though I hope you won't do it again. Violence is not the answer to your questions." And with that, she went away and helped the wounded men. There was nothing more I could do at the moment, so it's better to walk away now. Away from humiliation... I stole a glance at her before I completely turned my back and walked away. She still forgave those people though they could have done something that might have resulted to her death.
This event is familiar... As I thought about it and recalled some events in the past, it was matched to something that is impossible to be repeated-- the day I met Sayo, also known as Lady Magdala. The same events happened in the past, though I didn't meet Sayo in the marketplace. But she spanked me, just like what Sayo did. She was also confronted by four men and was just the same with Sayo... And the pendant-- 'Oh no... I forgot to return it to her!' This is getting weird by the minute... Are the events just modified but repeated itself involving me and the girl? Masaka...
I stopped infront of the Kamiya dojo, the least place I wanted to be in. I didn't know where my feet were taking me, but here I am. 'Oh no...' I thought. I wish to retreat, but Yahiko saw me, for the front gate was left open. "Ohayou, Sanosuke!" He greeted me. This young kid looked at me intently and asked, "What happened?" "What do you mean, 'what happened'?" "I mean, you should have been already bragging about what to eat right now, and you aren't. Did something happen?" 'This boy is so nosy...' I thought. I was thinking if I would answer his question, but I think it's not the right time. "No, nothing happened, except the fact that this is not the place I wanted to be in. See, I was expecting to go Megumi's place to have a decent breakfast, but beacuse of-- " "Aha! So, something did happen! C'mon, why don't you tell me? You could trust me, than Kaoru," he promptly said. Well, I had no choice but to do so. "Well, someone bumped unto me this morning in the marketplace. Then, she was confronted by four men from the government and she dropped this," I showed the pendant to him and he commented before I could even speak again. "It belongs to a Christian, right? I thought they were already exiled in Holland? Why is there a Christian still in this place?" "I don't know, Yahiko. But, something weird happened..." "What? What is it?" He excitedly asked. I looked at him in disbelief. He seemed so excited about this, more than I do. "You weren't there, so you won't know... But, the same thing happened when I met Sayo... I mean, Sayo was confronted with four men, the same with that girl; Sayo slapped me in the face, and you know what that girl did? She did the same! And another thing, she dropped this, and again, I forgot to return this to her... the same thing I forgot to return to Sayo..." "Hmm... You're right... that sounded weird..." Kaoru nodded beside Yahiko. "What are you doing here?!" A startled Yahiko asked. "You aren't supposed to be meddling in guy talks, you know." And with that, he was rewarded a smack on the head by a fuming Kaoru. I then nodded in agreement. "Though there are some things you might understand about the talk, you should have gave warning that you'd come here. Or a better way, you should not have just walked in and gave your comment about what happened." A slap. Then another. And another. I was slapped again and again by this furious Kamiya dojo owner, which resulted to my cheeks being in the state of real torture. "That's no way to treat a lady! Such words! I only came here to ask where Kenshin is, but I heard your conversation, so I thought I'll snoop in for a while. But, really," she said as she left both of us (Yahiko and I) sprawled on the ground because of what she did. "It's a weird thing. Unusual... How could have that happened? Could that girl be somehow related to Sayo?" With those words, I sat beside Yahiko and asked her about it. "You think so? I mean, are you assuming that that girl is related to Sayo?" "Well, yeah... sort of. But I may be wrong about that thing. But still, it might be used as a clue to her real identity. Oh, yeah! Why don't you invite her here and she might become another student of the Kamiya dojo!" 'She looked so excited about this girl...' I thought. "Hey, I don't even know where she lives! And I might not be able to see her again, because she just bumped unto me this morning." "Oh no, you don't... Tee-hee, you have that pendant with you, don't you? Don't you have any intention to return it to her?" Her eyes glinted with mischievousness. "Hey, it's none of your business..." I think she got me... "Well, okay... I won't force you if you don't want to. But, actually," she stood up and went the other way, "it's an act of stealing, if you won't be able to return that to her." She said firmly. 'Kuso...!' I thought. 'She really got me this time. It's like I have no intention to return this, but I wanted to do it in my own way. What she's asking me is more than enough. She wanted me to look for that girl and let her be her student. Man, isn't she asking much?' I stood up and got ready to leave the dojo. "Aren't you going to eat first?" Kaoru asked. "No, I don't need any food of yours. I prefer the fox-lady's. I might just be rushing back to the benjo once I taste the food you will give me." "Why you--!" She exclaimed as she tried to get me and whack me with her bokken, but was held off by Yahiko. "And yeah, it's up to me whether I am going to return this to her or not. And if I do, it's up to her if she wanted to be your student or not. I'm not going to follow your order just because you told me so. Ja!" I explained. Those words didn't stop her from being outraged. I shrugged her reactions off. And before I look for that girl, I need something to fill me up. "Ohayou, Sanosuke," Kenshin greeted me as I met him in going out the dojo. "Ja!" I greeted him back. It might be a harsh thing to say, but I really need to eat right now. This unnatural craving for too much food is killing me. And a place away from them is a good idea. I don't want to dine with them while talking about that girl. I continued to trod towards Megumi's place, leaving Kenshin wondering what was the matter with me.
Once the dojo was out of the vision, I rounded the corner to Megumi's residence. At once, when the children saw me, they ran towards me and led me inside. "Ohayou, Sanosuke," Gensai-san greeted me. "You're just in time. Join us." "Arigato, Gensai-san," I said as I sat down and ate with them. "Is Megumi there?" "What is it that you want?" She demanded. "Whow... slow down. You don't need to be that demanding. I won't borrow money from you, don't worry. I was just going to ask whether you know someone of different religion from us that is still here in Japan. Do you know someone who's a Christian here?" I asked her. "A Christian? I thought they were exiled in Holland just a few weeks ago..." Gensai-san told me, then he returned to feeding his grandchildren. "Yes, they were," I replied. "Why are you asking? Did you come here just to talk about this? I don't know anyone here having such religion." "Hey, I was just confirming. I thought.." I trailed off as I munched a sushi, "you knew someone of that sort. I mean, if she's working with you, or something..." "She?" Megumi asked. "Yes, 'she'... I was just assuming, that when that girl bumped onto me this morning in the marketplace, she was a Christian. She had this pendant she dropped, see.." "Oh, I see. Well, maybe you could just see her in the market, or trodding down the street, or maybe, you could just meet her again if she'll bump onto you," "Yeah, right. Thanks for the idea, Megumi." I said sarcastically. However, she missed the sarcasm I gave her. After I finished my meal, I bid goodbye and thanked them for the nice meal. "Arigato, Megumi-san, Gensai-san. Ja!"
* * *
Her real identity is concealed right now. I don't know a thing about her, but her actions made me yearn to know her more. It's like I've met her before, but it's blurry... But whatever I do, all I have to do is wait. I can't just rush things. Now, I need time to think about it, and since she don't know me yet, it's better to lay-low for a while...
As I went home after a rather tiring day, I can't stop thinking about her features... She had dark brown hair, unlike Sayo's and that hair was about the same length as Sayo's... Sayo, Sayo, Sayo.. You're really different from her. From the way she looked, it seems like she is in her late teens and probably eighteen or nineteen. Though there is a great difference in their external appearance, they share the same trait, excluding the fact that they may have the same religion... they also share an extraordimary aura that soothes me, but in one way or another, reminds me of a miserable event in my life. But that aura makes you feel like there is still hope, though the ones important to you have already gone into the other world they call Paradise. Though they have the same trait, they are competitive, although not in a sense that they can fight. They are both "harsh" in a way, for these humans slapped me instead of thanking me in the first place. But now, all I can do is smile inwardly of the thing both of them did to me. I sighed inwardly. True, I can't bring Sayo back... but is this girl a "replacement" for her? But what am I going to do if she is? ...That can never happen. There's only one Sayo, and no one could ever replace her. No one.
I lied in my futon and held the pendant in my eyes, just few inches away from my face. It was still with me, for I didn't see any sign of her the whole day. Again, I sighed, this time audibly. When can I see her again? Where can I see her again? How am I going to see her again? If I do, what would I say? 'Do you know Amakusa Sayo?' No, maybe not. It's a lame question... It's like I'm looking for somebody who's like a needle in the midst of wheat and grass... As I thought about it more, thoughts circled my head which only meant one thing-- I really want to know her. "Who are you?" I whispered in the still night air before I drifted off to sleep. No one was able to answer me at the moment, but the cool night wind whispered something back to me....
* * *
Morning came and went the darkness... Another day of struggle; another day of business... I then went to the town hoping to meet that girl again. She really had the familiar aura that made me recall certain things about Sayo... I then had this weird and very unbelieveable idea that she's another sibling of Sayo... As I passed by the small bridge while going to the town, I saw someone quite familiar, staring to the river and then drawing in a thing that seemed like a thick book. It was that girl. It was funny to view her like this... No, it wasn't funny. What I mean is that it's somehow peaceful and entertaining at the same time. I went down the bridge and went to her place. Sneakily, hoping that she won't feel my presence, I stopped behind her and looked at what she was doing... It startled me as I saw what was keeping her busy. It was like a picture.. like the scenario was cut by an invisible hand and pasted perfectly to the paper she was drawing on. It really was a perfectly done masterpiece. Just as she was about to add the final touch to her piece, she quickly stopped and looked behind her, spotting me. She quickly hid the paper she was holding and inserted it to a book she had along with her. "What are you doing here?" She asked, though rather in a small voice. She was obviously astonished by my presence, and it really is evident that she didn't feel me earlier; she was too busy with her work and didn't pay too much attention to her surroundings. "I was just intrigued by your actions as I've seen you over the bridge, so I decided I'd like to see what you were doing which seemed like it required a deep concentration. But, since I've seen what kept you so serious, I'll just return this to you. I'm sorry if I forgot to to do so yesterday." I then handed the pendant back to her. She received it and said, "Thank you... I thought I wouldn't see it again... You're that man, aren't you? You're Sagara Sanosuke-kun, right?" "You may call me Sanosuke, if you want to. By the way, may I know your name?" I asked. Man, am I too straightforward? She smiled and answered the question asked of her, "Magdala," "Chotto matte... is that your real name?" "Of course it is. I was baptised having that name." She stood silent for a while, then sat on the grass, staring at the river. "Do you remember someone having that name? To tell you the truth, since the day you helped me with those men, I feel like I've known you before; like I've seen you before... I mean, before I bumped into you the yesterday." "Yes... I remember someone having that name. And the same as mine... I feel like you're somebody I knew before..." Silence. As I was thinking about what I have said, I laughed at it. I literally did so. It was funny I said those words in front of her. But, as I heard her laugh with me, I thought she might be thinking the same way. It died down, after a quite a long time, which made me and her quite breathless. "You know, I've never laughed like this in my life after my parents died. I was left alone and I now sell these pieces to earn money. I don't have permanent source of income, see. But I use my ability to live. No one would accept me, because if they find out that I do not believe in Shintoism, they are afraid that the government will come after them and arrest them with me. I don't want that thing to happen, so I live by myself." She paused for a while, then continued, "How about you? Do you have any family?" "No. They already died since I was a kid. But, during my childhood, I became a member of Sekiho Tai, the anti-Shogunate group. There, I met the person I considered my father, who treated me like I was his own. We were like a family at that time, but since that was ten years ago, still in the Shogu era, people who work for the government kill those who are against them. The person I considered my father, who was the leader of the group, was killed by beheading him. He threw me into the river and I witnessed his death. Since then, I lived a life of revenge, but also helping people those who are in need of it." As I was telling her my past, she said, "Is that the reason you are not too sure about what you feel?" I was startled of her response, but I replied, "Yes." I didn't know what to respond at her. But, I guess that's true. "It's pretty sad to think that we don't have any family left here with us. However, I believe that they are happy and contented now. I wish I could see them again..." she sighed beside me. "Do you feel empty without them?" I asked. "Yes, though not too often. I believe that they are still watching me from above. I just think that it's not right to seclude myself away from others just because they left me. I now that it might be hard to accept it at first, but I need to live, to survive, even though I sometimes feel like I am alone in the world." "Yeah... I think you're right. Hey, if ever you feel like you're alone, don't be... you could count on me, and you may see me anytime you want." "Are you suggesting that we become friends?" I laughed. "You got me there. So, can we?" She thought hard for a while, like she was having doubts whether she'd be my friend or not. "Of course! Why not? At least I won't be alone--literally." "I forgot.. You live alone, right?" "Yes, I do." "Where do you stay? Do you have any place you stay in?" "Yesterday, I had one. But now, it's gone. I mean, I stayed in a teacher's house as her servant, but when she found out my status as a Christian, she told me I better get out of this place, because I am in danger. She was a very kind person. She even gave me a few pieces of paper and a couple of charcoal pencil to use for a source of income. Even when I was working for her and her children, I was submitting my works to a shop nearby and if ever someone would buy it, the owner of that shop will give me my part. I continued to do that habit, but up to now, though I have small fortune, I am still not safe. And now, I am wondering where I would stay..." She told me. With that, an idea came in my mind that she could just come with me to my house. But, I thought it's not quite right to do so. I don't want her to go to Kaoru's dojo because she might just be bombarded with questions... But with Megumi's house, I wouldn't know, she might just be arrested without me knowing it. Not that I don't trust her... but, just to be sure... "Um, you could--" I was cut off by running policemen from afar towards our direction. 'Kuso! Why can't they turn up in another while? They always butt in without timing!' "Magdala, we need to go. People are looking for you again." I said, as I stood up. "Where are we going?" I thought for a while.. 'My house is definitely far from here. Megumi's not in her house right now... And it's farther than mine. So I have no choice but to go to-- "Kaoru's dojo. That place is quite near here. Past the sakura trees." She stood up, picked up her book and her materials with her and nodded her head. "Arigato, Sanosuke." "C'mon." I ran towards the Kamiya dojo and she followed my lead. I glanced at her, behind me, and I noticed that her pace is quite slow. Now, I'm having doubts whether she's still going to make it. Halfway towards the dojo, I felt her stop behind me. I turned to her and saw that her pale flesh is now flushed and she was perspiring. I ran towards her just as she was about to fall, yet again; I caught her just in time. There was no other choice but to carry her towards the dojo. We were still followed, though we acquired certain distance from them. I carried her in my back, just what I did to Sayo. 'This event is getting weirder by the minute...' I thought. I just want to keep her from those guys, and then, I'll try to ask her who she really is. I could hear her shallow breaths issuing from her mouth. I wonder what was wrong with her. I hope she wouldn't end up like Sayo... I can't afford to loose someone like her again. She might just be way for me to become more sure about what I feel.
After running for what seemed only just a few seconds, I reached the front gates of the dojo. I quickly opened them and got inside. People in this place just looked at me as I just entered without any warning. I had no more time to waste. I approached them and I asked for their help. "Kaoru, I need you to help me with her. She's the girl I'm talking about. Her chasers are about to reach us, so I need your help to hide her from them. I'll explain the details later." "What's the matter with her?" Kaoru asked with sincere concern for Magdala. "She just went weak after running," I responded. "Here, hand me to her. I'll help her out. Yahiko, help me prepare the room for her." "Arigato, Kaoru." Kaoru and Yahiko then proceeded to the other room, leaving me and Kenshin alone for a talk. "Sumimasen about what I acted the yesterday. I was really pissed off at that time." "Don't worry about it, it's okay." A pause, then, "Is something bothering you?" He asked me. Of course, it's hard to hide that when you're infront of an ex-battousai. I told him the reason, "Yeah... it's her. Strange things started to happen since yesterday, up to now. I don't know if I'm just dreaming, or something, but quite identical events occured to me, involving that girl. I don't know, I assume that it's like a repetition of things..." "Hmm.. it might be. But, do you feel something unusual about it? I mean, what if she's just a reincarnation of Sayo, or something?" "I don't know... but all I have to do now is to keep her away from them. Maybe, after a few days, I'll help her to get out of this place to another which will accept her without conditions. Who knows what would happen in the next few days?" "You're right. The best way to do now is to look after her and keep her away from trouble. If the condition's stable, you could do whatever you want for her own good." "Yeah..." Kaoru and Yahiko returned and joined our conversation. "Don't worry, she's already fine. She just needed to rest to relax those sore muscles. Oh yeah... why did you bring her here? I mean, you could bring her to Megumi for her to rest fully..." "Do you think I could reach her house quickly? We were in hot pursuit! And her house is farther than mine. What else do you want to expect from me? This dojo is nearer than any of our houses and I thought that the police won't be able to sense that she's here. I mean, they won't suspect you're hiding her for me." "Okay, okay.." "Hey, you told us that you were being chased, where are they now?" Yahiko piped in. "I don't know. Maybe they already gave up." "Why didn't you just fight them?" Kaoru asked. "I-- I can't. I can't show that to her again. She might just be disappointed, because she said she believed in non-violence. So, that's that. I can't fight them infront of her." "Okay, I see... Hey, Sano... do you have any fever? Is that you? Why so soft? Don't tell me that girl made you stop punching something..." Yahiko teased. "Well, you just said it... you want one? I'd be glad to give one just for you. I haven't practiced yet, you know? Maybe you really want to have one." I said as I cracked my knuckles. Laughter rang once more in the dojo. It was a thing to say... Really, I think Yahiko's right. Maybe Magdala influenced me not to use violence anymore... As soon as the laughter died down, Kaoru asked, yet again, "By the way, what's her name?" "I don't know whether you'll believe it or not, but she said her name was Magdala." "What?! Are you sure you heard it correctly?" Yahiko teased once more. "Yeah, you git. You won't believe me, then don't. I don't expect you to. You would just think it was all bluff. Then why don't you ask her yourself?" "Hey, I was just joking, you know? Why so hot so suddenly? Sheesh..." "Sanosuke, she bumped unto you yesterday, right?" "Yes... hey...! How did you know? Don't tell me--" I turned towards the two. "Yes, it was them..." Kenshin smiled at me. "Okay... I'll forgive you this time, but the next time you butt in in some conversations, you won't remember who you are for about a few hours." I addressed the two. "Don't you think she have a different purpose of coming here? What if she really is the reincarnation of Sayo?" Kenshin gave his thoughts. "You think so, Kenshin?" Kaoru asked. "I don't know. I'm just assuming, because for me, no person would just be able to meet someone by chance. What if it's really meant to be? Maybe Sayo wanted to tell you something, but was not able to, last time..." Silence prevailed in the four of us. 'What if it's really meant to be?' I repeated those words to myself. "It might just be...."
* * *
Night came and no disturbances occured. I asked if I could stay in the dojo today, I reasoned out, "I want to be with her for a while. I want to be with her if ever somone would like to attack her." They laughed at my reason and even teased me before they went to sleep. What kind of people are they? Anyway, I shrugged off their reactions, especially Kaoru's. It's a good thing Kenshin didn't do that also. I don't know what I'd be able to do then...
I sat near her futon as I looked at her. It was already late and I suppose, all the three of them are already asleep, unless they are spying on me. I was thinking, what if she's just Sayo's reincarnation, like what Kenshin said? What is her purpose, why did she come back? I decided to go out for a while, to look at the velvet sky. As I looked at it, the black sky imbeded by shining diamonds, I recall the moment Sayo treated my wounds. It was really surprising that she knew me-- I mean, who I really am--like I am short-tempered, I love fights, and so on. Did the gods hear my prayer? Why did she come back? Because you asked for it... A thought answered my question. I did... What do I feel right now? Gladness? Guilt? I don't know... I don't exactly know what I feel right now. I'm too unsure.
Just as I was just staring at the sky, I felt someone sit beside me. I turned to face that person and I saw Magdala. "What are you doing here?" I asked her. "I can't sleep... How about you?" She asked back. "Just the same." I answered casually. She looked towards the black velvet sky and said, "The stars are unusually bright tonight, aren't they? Did you notice?" "No... not actually. My mind was drifting off to somewhere else, but now I could see that," I smiled at myself. "You know, you could do that more often. It suits you, because on first look, you seem to engage anyone in a fight." "What do you mean I could do that more often? What, smile?" "Yep, that's it. You look too serious if you won't smile. And, maybe, Sayo would like that." The last four words that she uttered sank deeply after a few moments. It seemed inaudible at first, but once I internalized it, it seemed that she shouted them. "How did you know about Sayo? Is she your sibling? Another relative?" Silence. She didn't respond to my question, instead, she continued to stare at the sky. What does she have in mind right now? She's so calm, yet I am too troubled of her real identity now. I can't think of anything else to say to her... I want to hear something from her... The truth.. I want the truth. Minutes passed by quietly between us, but there were crickets who were playing their piece to add some sound in the environment surrounding us. I was taken aback as I just felt her lean her head on my shoulder. I thought she just fell asleep because of the stillness around us, but I was wrong. Though her dark brown hair hid her face, I could sense that she was gasping, although she was trying hard not to let me hear it. What I could hear now was like an incantation, unlike what I heard a moment ago. She was chanting something, like a prayer that only she could understand. Slowly, I felt her head slide down from my shoulder to my chest. She was silent, and I could not hear any gasping anymore, but just a normal breathing rate. I turned her around to face me and she really is asleep now. 'She fell asleep because it was too silent,' I thought. I stood up and carried her to the room she was in earlier.
As I laid her down back to the futon, a word escaped from her mouth which definitely caught my attention. "Sanosuke..." All I could do was smile at her, though she won't be able to see it. "Good night... Sayo..."