~*~ Chapter Two: Rain, Piranhas and Teletubbies ~*~
An hour after the weird havoc that erupted in the FF7 apartment...
Yuffie: Isn't anyone wondering why Tifa ain't back yet? I mean like... it's been at least an hour already... I think it's been like, too long now, y'know?
::crickets::
Yuffie: ...Now I know how Tifa felt earlier...
::owl hoots::
Yuffie: No one's paying attention to me so I'll just go check on her then... (Grabs her monopoly properties and her gil)
Cloud: Um, what are you doing?
Yuffie: Taking my stuff away from here... with me.
Cloud: ...Uh, why?
Yuffie: I don't trust any of you, guys. Once I turn my back you're all just gonna steal my properties and gil...
Cloud: (Stands and glares at Yuffie) What kind of friend are you? Can't you trust us?
Yuffie: Uh... no.
Cloud: (Grins mischievously) C'mon Yuffie. You could trust us. Go ahead and check on Tifa. We promise not to get anything. Right guys?
Vincent: ... (nods)
Cait Sith: Ditto to that.
Barret: I don't frickin' give a damn.
Cid: %*$#%@($(*%$%*$#(*&%$ #&
Nanaki: As you wish.
Cloud: (Grins very widely)
Yuffie: Okay, okay. I'll leave it! DON'T GET A DAMN THING OR YOU GUYS ARE SO FREAKIN' ASKING FOR IT!!!
Cloud: ... Sure, fine... whatever.
Yuffie: (Turns and leaves)
Cloud: (Whistles and inches close to Yuffie's gil) Hehehehe... Dude, she is like so gullible! Hehehe (Steals all Yuffie's gil)
Vincent: ...
Nanaki: Weirdo.
Vincent: Why are there so few words in your supposedly wide vocabulary, as I have been told.
Nanaki: That is of a reason that even I am not aware of.
Vincent: Really now? Well, from my sources you are presumably the all-knowing.
Nanaki: And maybe your sources are just an assemblage of insolent, over-confident pups?
Vincent: (Weird English gentlemanly accent) Now see here young fellow...
Nanaki: Young? I'll teach you for calling me young!!! (Bares white teeth that shimmer to the bright morning sun)
Vincent: (Weird English gentlemanly accent) High-ho Diggetty! Tally-ho!!!
Cloud: Dude! You two are tishing again.
Cait Sith: Tishing?
Barret: Dammit foo'! You've bin watsching too much' of dat Disney Channel.
Cait Sith: Tishing?
Cid: And too much of those freakin' Weekenders.
Cait Sith: Tishing?
Cloud: Well you, pumpkin pie have been watching too much Teletubies.
Cid: (Pokes Cloud on the nose with his Venus Gospel) What the hell you just call me?
Cait Sith: Tishing?
Cloud: Easy now, trigger. Put down the spear. (Grabs Ultima from behind him)
Cid: (Sees Ultima being unsheathed so he hits Cloud's hand, causing him to drop his sword) Ha! You gotta do better than that, Spike!
Cloud: That's what I intend to do! (leans down and trips Cid)
Meanwhile...
Yuffie: (Knocks on the door of the bathroom) Yo Tifa! You still in there?
:: No answer ::
Yuffie: Tifa?
Tifa: Yuffie? Is that you?
Yuffie: Yeah! So what's like taking you so long in there? Ain't you done yet? It's been like... y'know, over an hour already!!!
Tifa: Uh, Yuffie?
Yuffie: And besides... huh? Yeah... what is it?
Tifa: The door's stuck...
Yuffie: WHAT?! REALLY??? (Struggles to open the door) Hey... you're right! Waitaminute! I'll go get Cloud! (Runs to the living room)
Tifa: What?! Yuffie!!! Yuffie!!! WAIT!!!
In the living room...
Cid: (Tries to slash Cloud with his spear)
Cloud: (Dodges the attack and counters it) Hah! Is that all you got Cid?
Cid: Whaddya mean by that? I'm just warming up.
Cloud: I'm sure you'll break out in a sweat soon enough.
Cid: I don't count on it.
Cloud: Wanna bet.
Cait Sith: Tishing? Pumpkin pie?
Barret: (Flips channels in the TV)
Cait Sith: Tishing? Pumpkin pie?
Vincent: What a foolhardy group.
Nanaki: Wastes such valuable time instead of doing something like philosophical research to ease the tense and stressed minds.
Cloud: (Pauses the "game" or battle with Cid) There you are... tishing again. (Unpauses the "game" to continue the battle with Cid)
Cait Sith: Tishing?
Everyone: (Stares at Cait Sith)
Cait Sith: Tishing?
Everyone: (Walk toward Cait Sith)
Cait Sith: Tishing? Pumpkin pie?
Cloud: (Grabs hold of Cait's right hand)
Cait Sith: Tishing? Pumpkin pie?
Cid: (Grabs onto Cait's left arm)
Cait Sith: Tishing? Pumpkin pie?
Barret: (Takes his right leg)
Cait Sith: Tishing? Pumpkin pie?
Vincent: (Seizes his left leg)
Cait Sith: Tishing? Pumpkin pie?
Nanaki: (Tries to go under to support Cait)
Cait Sith: Tishing? Pumpkin pie?
Everyone: (Exits to the balcony, dragging Cait Sith with them)
Cait Sith: Tishing? Pumpkin pie?
Yuffie: (Enters the room) Cloud! Cloud!! CLOUD!!! Tifa's... huh? (Looks around to see ripped pillows everywhere, the TV running, monopoly pieces scattered and feathers flying everywhere) What the f*ck happened here? Cloud! Where are you? Oh, well. (Goes back to the room she came from)
Outside...
Cloud: Did you hear someone calling me?
Nanaki: I didn't here anything.
Cloud: ...Hmm, okay! On the count of three, drop him! One...
Cid: Two...
All: Three!!! (Drops Cait Sith into a swimming pool)
Cait Sith: Tishing? Pumpkin pie? (Lands in the water and short-circuits)
Cloud: All right! Now... for the main event! Who has the piranhas?
Vincent: Are the fish in here? (Points to a rusty, side-bitten bucket)
Cloud: That's the one! Bring it over here!
Barret: Let's dump it on the foo'!
Cloud: Be my guest.
Barret: (Drops the piranhas together with the bucket)
Cid: Look at those freaks go!
Piranhas: (Land in the water and devour the floating Cait Sith)
Cait Sith: Tish-i-ng-ng-ng... Pum-pik-kin-p-y-py...
Cloud: Oh yeah! Point for the Cloud maester!
Nanaki: Don't' you mean master?
Cloud: Yeah, sure... whatever.
It starts raining and everybody gets wet...
Barret: I'm going inside.
Nanaki: I wouldn't want to be catching an abnormal temperature and pulse right now don't we?
Vincent: ...
Cid: $&@%&(#&(&^%(&%(@
Cloud: (Stares up into the sky) Stupid eehhh! Rain... my worst enemy. (Signature spikes start drooping) Damn you! (Gets hit by a lightning bolt) Owchies... (Goes inside)
Barret: (Flips channel)
TV: (Is playing Teletubbies) Laalaa! Po!
Cid: Oh no! Teletubbies!!! (Covers ears) It's not working! (Transforms) Eh-oh!!! Big hug!
Barret: Wha' you talkin' abou' foo'?
Cloud: (Spikes still drooping) What the --?! Dude! He's talking like a damn teletubby... I mean like... DUDE!!!
Cid: (Changes channel of TV)
TV: (Is playing "Without Me" by Eminem in the Dancing Osama bin Laden part)
Cid: (Dances out the room) Tewetabbies! Tewetabbies! So this looks like a job for me... nanananana!
Barret and Cloud: (Stare at Cid)
Nanaki: (Licks his paws)
Vincent: ...
Cloud: Gotta go to the bathroom... Need to straighten out my spikes!
An hour after the weird havoc that erupted in the FF7 apartment...
Yuffie: Isn't anyone wondering why Tifa ain't back yet? I mean like... it's been at least an hour already... I think it's been like, too long now, y'know?
::crickets::
Yuffie: ...Now I know how Tifa felt earlier...
::owl hoots::
Yuffie: No one's paying attention to me so I'll just go check on her then... (Grabs her monopoly properties and her gil)
Cloud: Um, what are you doing?
Yuffie: Taking my stuff away from here... with me.
Cloud: ...Uh, why?
Yuffie: I don't trust any of you, guys. Once I turn my back you're all just gonna steal my properties and gil...
Cloud: (Stands and glares at Yuffie) What kind of friend are you? Can't you trust us?
Yuffie: Uh... no.
Cloud: (Grins mischievously) C'mon Yuffie. You could trust us. Go ahead and check on Tifa. We promise not to get anything. Right guys?
Vincent: ... (nods)
Cait Sith: Ditto to that.
Barret: I don't frickin' give a damn.
Cid: %*$#%@($(*%$%*$#(*&%$ #&
Nanaki: As you wish.
Cloud: (Grins very widely)
Yuffie: Okay, okay. I'll leave it! DON'T GET A DAMN THING OR YOU GUYS ARE SO FREAKIN' ASKING FOR IT!!!
Cloud: ... Sure, fine... whatever.
Yuffie: (Turns and leaves)
Cloud: (Whistles and inches close to Yuffie's gil) Hehehehe... Dude, she is like so gullible! Hehehe (Steals all Yuffie's gil)
Vincent: ...
Nanaki: Weirdo.
Vincent: Why are there so few words in your supposedly wide vocabulary, as I have been told.
Nanaki: That is of a reason that even I am not aware of.
Vincent: Really now? Well, from my sources you are presumably the all-knowing.
Nanaki: And maybe your sources are just an assemblage of insolent, over-confident pups?
Vincent: (Weird English gentlemanly accent) Now see here young fellow...
Nanaki: Young? I'll teach you for calling me young!!! (Bares white teeth that shimmer to the bright morning sun)
Vincent: (Weird English gentlemanly accent) High-ho Diggetty! Tally-ho!!!
Cloud: Dude! You two are tishing again.
Cait Sith: Tishing?
Barret: Dammit foo'! You've bin watsching too much' of dat Disney Channel.
Cait Sith: Tishing?
Cid: And too much of those freakin' Weekenders.
Cait Sith: Tishing?
Cloud: Well you, pumpkin pie have been watching too much Teletubies.
Cid: (Pokes Cloud on the nose with his Venus Gospel) What the hell you just call me?
Cait Sith: Tishing?
Cloud: Easy now, trigger. Put down the spear. (Grabs Ultima from behind him)
Cid: (Sees Ultima being unsheathed so he hits Cloud's hand, causing him to drop his sword) Ha! You gotta do better than that, Spike!
Cloud: That's what I intend to do! (leans down and trips Cid)
Meanwhile...
Yuffie: (Knocks on the door of the bathroom) Yo Tifa! You still in there?
:: No answer ::
Yuffie: Tifa?
Tifa: Yuffie? Is that you?
Yuffie: Yeah! So what's like taking you so long in there? Ain't you done yet? It's been like... y'know, over an hour already!!!
Tifa: Uh, Yuffie?
Yuffie: And besides... huh? Yeah... what is it?
Tifa: The door's stuck...
Yuffie: WHAT?! REALLY??? (Struggles to open the door) Hey... you're right! Waitaminute! I'll go get Cloud! (Runs to the living room)
Tifa: What?! Yuffie!!! Yuffie!!! WAIT!!!
In the living room...
Cid: (Tries to slash Cloud with his spear)
Cloud: (Dodges the attack and counters it) Hah! Is that all you got Cid?
Cid: Whaddya mean by that? I'm just warming up.
Cloud: I'm sure you'll break out in a sweat soon enough.
Cid: I don't count on it.
Cloud: Wanna bet.
Cait Sith: Tishing? Pumpkin pie?
Barret: (Flips channels in the TV)
Cait Sith: Tishing? Pumpkin pie?
Vincent: What a foolhardy group.
Nanaki: Wastes such valuable time instead of doing something like philosophical research to ease the tense and stressed minds.
Cloud: (Pauses the "game" or battle with Cid) There you are... tishing again. (Unpauses the "game" to continue the battle with Cid)
Cait Sith: Tishing?
Everyone: (Stares at Cait Sith)
Cait Sith: Tishing?
Everyone: (Walk toward Cait Sith)
Cait Sith: Tishing? Pumpkin pie?
Cloud: (Grabs hold of Cait's right hand)
Cait Sith: Tishing? Pumpkin pie?
Cid: (Grabs onto Cait's left arm)
Cait Sith: Tishing? Pumpkin pie?
Barret: (Takes his right leg)
Cait Sith: Tishing? Pumpkin pie?
Vincent: (Seizes his left leg)
Cait Sith: Tishing? Pumpkin pie?
Nanaki: (Tries to go under to support Cait)
Cait Sith: Tishing? Pumpkin pie?
Everyone: (Exits to the balcony, dragging Cait Sith with them)
Cait Sith: Tishing? Pumpkin pie?
Yuffie: (Enters the room) Cloud! Cloud!! CLOUD!!! Tifa's... huh? (Looks around to see ripped pillows everywhere, the TV running, monopoly pieces scattered and feathers flying everywhere) What the f*ck happened here? Cloud! Where are you? Oh, well. (Goes back to the room she came from)
Outside...
Cloud: Did you hear someone calling me?
Nanaki: I didn't here anything.
Cloud: ...Hmm, okay! On the count of three, drop him! One...
Cid: Two...
All: Three!!! (Drops Cait Sith into a swimming pool)
Cait Sith: Tishing? Pumpkin pie? (Lands in the water and short-circuits)
Cloud: All right! Now... for the main event! Who has the piranhas?
Vincent: Are the fish in here? (Points to a rusty, side-bitten bucket)
Cloud: That's the one! Bring it over here!
Barret: Let's dump it on the foo'!
Cloud: Be my guest.
Barret: (Drops the piranhas together with the bucket)
Cid: Look at those freaks go!
Piranhas: (Land in the water and devour the floating Cait Sith)
Cait Sith: Tish-i-ng-ng-ng... Pum-pik-kin-p-y-py...
Cloud: Oh yeah! Point for the Cloud maester!
Nanaki: Don't' you mean master?
Cloud: Yeah, sure... whatever.
It starts raining and everybody gets wet...
Barret: I'm going inside.
Nanaki: I wouldn't want to be catching an abnormal temperature and pulse right now don't we?
Vincent: ...
Cid: $&@%&(#&(&^%(&%(@
Cloud: (Stares up into the sky) Stupid eehhh! Rain... my worst enemy. (Signature spikes start drooping) Damn you! (Gets hit by a lightning bolt) Owchies... (Goes inside)
Barret: (Flips channel)
TV: (Is playing Teletubbies) Laalaa! Po!
Cid: Oh no! Teletubbies!!! (Covers ears) It's not working! (Transforms) Eh-oh!!! Big hug!
Barret: Wha' you talkin' abou' foo'?
Cloud: (Spikes still drooping) What the --?! Dude! He's talking like a damn teletubby... I mean like... DUDE!!!
Cid: (Changes channel of TV)
TV: (Is playing "Without Me" by Eminem in the Dancing Osama bin Laden part)
Cid: (Dances out the room) Tewetabbies! Tewetabbies! So this looks like a job for me... nanananana!
Barret and Cloud: (Stare at Cid)
Nanaki: (Licks his paws)
Vincent: ...
Cloud: Gotta go to the bathroom... Need to straighten out my spikes!