Chapter 7
Serena punched the buttons and listened to the phone ring. The thunder boomed and threatened to downpour any second. She walked briskly along the deserted street back to the hotel. "Come on, pick up." She commanded, praying Angel had his phone on. Gunn picked up.
"Yeah." He said into the phone.
"What are you doing answering Angel's phone?" She asked, preoccupied by the lightning flashing above her.
"Angel's kind of, uh, busy right now." She heard the sounds of a scuffle in the background.
"Okay, can you give him a message?" She didn't wait for an answer. "I found out what Edwards is worshipping and when the ceremony is. I also found out his redemption is coming soon."
Gunn was silent. Serena continued. "Just relay that message and come back to headquarters as soon as you're finished beating the crap out of Buddy." The scuffling grew more noticeable. "You better be careful with the cops." She warned.
"Oh we are. We'll meet you back at h-q in a few." He ended the call. She shoved her phone inside her pocket just as she felt a drop of water hit her hand. Suddenly, the sky opened up, and the rain came down in buckets.
Oh, wonderful. Now I'm going to look like a drowned rat. She thought to herself. She hurried through the rain until she reached the hotel. Cordelia greeted her inside.
"You look happier than when you left." Cordy commented.
"Yeah, well I got to beat the living crap out of someone. That's good therapy." Serena grinned. "I do feel kinda better. Minus the fact I'm sopping wet." She finger combed her hair and sighed. "Have you heard from Angel?" She took off her dripping jacket, looked around, wondering where to put it, and finally, in disgust, threw it onto the couch.
"Yeah, he just got back a few seconds before you. Made a bee-line for his office." Cordy shrugged. "I don't know what got into him."
Serena cautiously headed for Angel's office. She opened the door and found the small office pitch black. "Angel?" she called. She flipped on the light. She found him sitting at his desk, staring off into space, feet propped up on the desk.
"Did you find anything?" Angel asked immediately, not looking at her.
"Yeah." Serena sensed Angel was in major brooding mode. She told him what went down in Ed's Bar. "So, I'm thinking that we only know a fraction of what's really going on. We know that Christian wants to get rid of me and you, but I think we need to find out his whole plan, and what the heck this Machida thing is."
Angel nodded absently. "Angel?" Serena called. She waved a hand in front of his face. "Can I be alone for a while?" Angel asked softly, still not meeting her eye.
Serena was hurt that he didn't want to come talk to her about whatever he was thinking about, but she pushed her feelings aside and respected Angel's wishes. She reached the door, and was about to put out the light. "You know, I'm here if you do need someone to talk to, if you're tired of being alone all the time."
Angel's voice cut in before she could leave. "I wasn't alone, for a while anyway." He turned to her. "Your sister. I loved her like I never thought I could love anyone. I always thought she was a.a soul-mate. I felt like we were made for each other." His eyes penetrated hers. She saw the pain and anguish that haunted him. "You remind me so much of her, it hurts. When I look at you, I see her. When I feel your heart beat, I instantly think its Buffy." He closed his eyes, trying to suppress his feelings. He knew he was hurting her.
Serena had come into the room and sat down slowly, listening to Angel's voice. It hurt even more to listen to the way he talked about her sister. Tears brimmed her eyes. "You don't feel like I'm a soul-mate, like we belong together?" she asked incredulously. "Because I do. When I look in your face, I feel your pain, what you're going through." She looked hopelessly at the floor. "I know I'm not my sister. I know I can never amount to what she was to you." She looked up at his face. His face reflected sorrow, sorrow for have said anything at all. "You can never love me the way you loved her, because she's your soul-mate, your heart." She began to lose it, letting the words ramble out. Angel tried to stop her, but she ignored him. She rose to her feet, saying what she had to say through gritted teeth and tears. "But you seem to forget that I'm your redemption. I'm setting my life on the line for you. I would never do that for anyone I didn't care about. I'm beginning to thing that if it were the other way around, you wouldn't do it for me." Not knowing what else to say, she fled from the office, slamming the door behind her.
*****
Angel slept another dream-filled night. He went to bed knowing half of the things he said weren't true. In mind's eye, he saw Serena, not Buffy, as his soul-mate. Once upon a time, he believed that he and Buffy were one, but now.he was so confused. He thought he could never feel for anyone what he felt for Buffy. So why was a nagging feeling there, like he just let something precious slip away?
As he slept, he dreamed. He saw her standing right in front of him. Her scent washed over him, the smoothness and velvety warmth of her skin ignited him; her innocence and courage and the deep love of her. He had severed their connection. He realized it and did not understand what possessed him to say such things.
The other half of his soul was hers.
He had a beating heart, in Serena's chest.
He walked in the sun, when she did.
All of these things, he once thought Buffy was. He was wrong.
In an uneasy slumber, Angel wept.
And dreamed.
In her room, Serena cried her heart out, avoiding the need for sleep that taunted her. She eventually surrendered to the sleepless, long hours ahead, by dozing off just as the sun rose.
Serena punched the buttons and listened to the phone ring. The thunder boomed and threatened to downpour any second. She walked briskly along the deserted street back to the hotel. "Come on, pick up." She commanded, praying Angel had his phone on. Gunn picked up.
"Yeah." He said into the phone.
"What are you doing answering Angel's phone?" She asked, preoccupied by the lightning flashing above her.
"Angel's kind of, uh, busy right now." She heard the sounds of a scuffle in the background.
"Okay, can you give him a message?" She didn't wait for an answer. "I found out what Edwards is worshipping and when the ceremony is. I also found out his redemption is coming soon."
Gunn was silent. Serena continued. "Just relay that message and come back to headquarters as soon as you're finished beating the crap out of Buddy." The scuffling grew more noticeable. "You better be careful with the cops." She warned.
"Oh we are. We'll meet you back at h-q in a few." He ended the call. She shoved her phone inside her pocket just as she felt a drop of water hit her hand. Suddenly, the sky opened up, and the rain came down in buckets.
Oh, wonderful. Now I'm going to look like a drowned rat. She thought to herself. She hurried through the rain until she reached the hotel. Cordelia greeted her inside.
"You look happier than when you left." Cordy commented.
"Yeah, well I got to beat the living crap out of someone. That's good therapy." Serena grinned. "I do feel kinda better. Minus the fact I'm sopping wet." She finger combed her hair and sighed. "Have you heard from Angel?" She took off her dripping jacket, looked around, wondering where to put it, and finally, in disgust, threw it onto the couch.
"Yeah, he just got back a few seconds before you. Made a bee-line for his office." Cordy shrugged. "I don't know what got into him."
Serena cautiously headed for Angel's office. She opened the door and found the small office pitch black. "Angel?" she called. She flipped on the light. She found him sitting at his desk, staring off into space, feet propped up on the desk.
"Did you find anything?" Angel asked immediately, not looking at her.
"Yeah." Serena sensed Angel was in major brooding mode. She told him what went down in Ed's Bar. "So, I'm thinking that we only know a fraction of what's really going on. We know that Christian wants to get rid of me and you, but I think we need to find out his whole plan, and what the heck this Machida thing is."
Angel nodded absently. "Angel?" Serena called. She waved a hand in front of his face. "Can I be alone for a while?" Angel asked softly, still not meeting her eye.
Serena was hurt that he didn't want to come talk to her about whatever he was thinking about, but she pushed her feelings aside and respected Angel's wishes. She reached the door, and was about to put out the light. "You know, I'm here if you do need someone to talk to, if you're tired of being alone all the time."
Angel's voice cut in before she could leave. "I wasn't alone, for a while anyway." He turned to her. "Your sister. I loved her like I never thought I could love anyone. I always thought she was a.a soul-mate. I felt like we were made for each other." His eyes penetrated hers. She saw the pain and anguish that haunted him. "You remind me so much of her, it hurts. When I look at you, I see her. When I feel your heart beat, I instantly think its Buffy." He closed his eyes, trying to suppress his feelings. He knew he was hurting her.
Serena had come into the room and sat down slowly, listening to Angel's voice. It hurt even more to listen to the way he talked about her sister. Tears brimmed her eyes. "You don't feel like I'm a soul-mate, like we belong together?" she asked incredulously. "Because I do. When I look in your face, I feel your pain, what you're going through." She looked hopelessly at the floor. "I know I'm not my sister. I know I can never amount to what she was to you." She looked up at his face. His face reflected sorrow, sorrow for have said anything at all. "You can never love me the way you loved her, because she's your soul-mate, your heart." She began to lose it, letting the words ramble out. Angel tried to stop her, but she ignored him. She rose to her feet, saying what she had to say through gritted teeth and tears. "But you seem to forget that I'm your redemption. I'm setting my life on the line for you. I would never do that for anyone I didn't care about. I'm beginning to thing that if it were the other way around, you wouldn't do it for me." Not knowing what else to say, she fled from the office, slamming the door behind her.
*****
Angel slept another dream-filled night. He went to bed knowing half of the things he said weren't true. In mind's eye, he saw Serena, not Buffy, as his soul-mate. Once upon a time, he believed that he and Buffy were one, but now.he was so confused. He thought he could never feel for anyone what he felt for Buffy. So why was a nagging feeling there, like he just let something precious slip away?
As he slept, he dreamed. He saw her standing right in front of him. Her scent washed over him, the smoothness and velvety warmth of her skin ignited him; her innocence and courage and the deep love of her. He had severed their connection. He realized it and did not understand what possessed him to say such things.
The other half of his soul was hers.
He had a beating heart, in Serena's chest.
He walked in the sun, when she did.
All of these things, he once thought Buffy was. He was wrong.
In an uneasy slumber, Angel wept.
And dreamed.
In her room, Serena cried her heart out, avoiding the need for sleep that taunted her. She eventually surrendered to the sleepless, long hours ahead, by dozing off just as the sun rose.