"If I Should Fall"- an ER fanfic featuring my favorite character,
Robert Romano!!!! :)
Disclaimer: I don't own ANY of the ER character (unfortunately), NBC
does. So, I think you know the rest. This is just a story. Please don't
sue me, because I don't have anything that you want.
Summary: Death/Angst/Suicide
Author's Note: Be careful. It's quite depressing.... This is how I
portrayed Robert's childhood....
CHAPTER 1: ONE STEP CLOSER
________________________________________
"No, Daddy! Please don't do that to Mommy! Leave her alone!" pleaded
little Robbie, tugging at his fathers arms. Before Robbie could say
anything else, a strong blow to the jaw sent him flying into the wall
behind him. Sitting there, he began to cry. Not because his jaw hurt,
but because he could hear Mommy crying as Daddy hit her. Daddy would
come home drunk, yelling at Mommy as he stumbled through the door. And
everytime he tried to protect Mommy, Daddy beat him too. Robbie was
used to it. But, sometimes Daddy would beat him for no reason. But what
Robbie hated most, was trying to hide the bruises and cuts from the
teachers at school. He never had to worry about what the other kids
would say. Daddy never let him play with them anyway. He told him that
he wasn't good enough to play with the kids his age. So, Robbie taught
himself how to keep entertained with the few toys he had. Interupting
his thoughts, his father grabbed him by the hair and pulled him up so
that he was standing. Little Robbie began to brace himself, as he
assumed that his father was going to beat him again. Instead, his
father yelled at him, slurring his words, "Go get your ass in the damn
car, and don't say a fucking word until I get there!" Robbie knew damn
well not to contradict what his father had just told him, so he grabbed
his winter coat and went out the door to the car. Soon, both his mother
and father were heading toward the car. He could see Mommy crying. One
of her eyes was swollen shut, and her face was purple and blue. There
was blood running from a cut on her face. She and Dad got into the car,
with Dad complaining the whole way. Robbie wondered where they were
going this late at night. It was way after dark, and the streets were
icy as the snow fell. Robbie sat there, not saying a word as his father
talked about wasting his life and about how his "stupid" family was
too much of a burden. Daddy continued to keep driving, even when they
had gone outside city limits into the country. Daddy was swerving in
and out of the lanes as Mommy pleaded with him to stop. The arguing got
worse as the car swerved around the lanes, the snow blowing around the
car. Suddenly the lights from an oncoming truck shined brightly right
in front of them. Mommy screamed as Daddy tried frantically to swerve
out of the way. But it was too late, the truck smashed into the front
of their car. That's all that Robbie remembered before drifting out of
conciousness.
___________________________________________
Robert Romano woke up, startled. Heart pounding, cold sweat, afraid.
This was beginning to be a trend. Every night, it was the same
nightmare that came back to haunt him. The car wreck had happened about
this time of the year. As as each year since the accident passed, the
nightmares continued to plague him. Mom and Dad had died in that car
wreck. Dad had deserved too. The way that he beat Mom and him, he
deserved to die. Robert had no way of knowing that child abuse was
illegal, and he had put up with it since he could remember. But Mom on
the other hand, did not deserve to die. He remembered how they rushed
him to the hospital, and told him that neither his Mom nor his Dad had
survived the accident. And thus began the 10 years of foster care. He
had been 8 when the accident happened, and for the next ten years, he
was jostled between foster care families. And as soon as he turned 18,
he hit the ground running. Went to college. Finished med school. Did
internship and fellowship. Moved to Chicago. Worked at County, and
eventually became Chief of Staff. He was unable to save his parents'
lives, but by God, he would dedicate his life to saving others. And he
did. He had saved many lives. But he couldn't hide the fact that work
sucked. He never interacted with his co-workers. As much as he would
never admit it, he would give anything to hang out with the guys, drink
beer, and talk B.S. about work. And now because of his shitty attitude,
none of the women wanted anything to do with him. Relationships with
Elizabeth, Kerry, Chen, Finch, Lucy, Susan, and pretty much any other
woman in the department: ruined. No one to talk to at work. No one to
talk to at home. No one to come home to. No family. No friends. Nothing
He had spent almost all of his life like this. And he was tired of it.
Nobody cared about him. People could care less about him. And Robert
was tired of being treated like that. He would show them. He was sick
of this place. Sick of the world. He was sick of everything. Time to
end it all. He already had notes written out for everyone at work, and
he would put the plan into action right before his shift ended. He
painstakingly left notes around the house. He knew long after he was
gone, they'd come here, to his house, and they'd find the notes. Robert
snickered, putting his best pair of Dockers on. His favorite dark blue
shirt. His coat. His tie. His favorite shoes. He double checked the
house to make sure everything was set up. Before grabbing his briefcase
, he bent down to pet Gretel one last time. "Goodbye Gretel. Thanks
for nothing all these years.", he said before picking up his briefcase,
taking one last glance at his house, and then going out the door.
______________________________________________
Dr. Elizabeth Corday sat at her desk, frantically trying to catch up on
post-op labs and dictations. Work had been a living hell for the past
week, and she was barely making it through this shift as it is. She
heard a soft knock. "Come in!" she said, still engulfed in her work.
She looked up to see Kerry Weaver standing in front of her. "Hey Kerry,
what can I do for you?" Elizabeth said. "Actually, I wanted to talk to
you about something." Kerry said, looking slightly uncomfortable as
she closed the door. "It's about Robert." Kerry said. "Oh." Elizabeth
said as she rolled her eyes. "Listen, Kerry, whatever he said, just
ignore it. You know that Robert enjoys tormenting other people." "No,
it's not that. It's actually the exact opposite. Have you noticed his
attitude lately? He seems depressed. He's losing interest in things
that once interested him. His work is slipping and overall he's not
acting like himself. Maybe it's just me, but I'm worried." kerry said.
"Kerry, I think it is just you. Yes, I have noticed quite the charater
change, but nothing that would suggest that something was wrong. I'm
sure it's nothing, Kerry. But if there any any extreme changes, I'll
come talk to you." "Okay, thanks for your time, Elizabeth." Kerry said
before exiting Elizabeth's office. Elizabeth just shook her head and
went back to finishing her paperwork.
___________________________________________
Work sucks, Robert thought to himself. Today had been just like every
other day, only seemingly worse. He'd assisted on a bypass surgery,
done an exploratory, an appendectomy, and been down to the ER many
different times for consults. While he'd been down there, he'd managed
to piss almost everybody off, he smirked as he took another big swig of
vodka. Yes, he was aware that he was still on call and that he was
drinking, but frankly he didn't give a shit. The world didn't give a
shit about him, so why should he? He'd been sitting in his office for
the past 3 hours, drinking and finishing up paperwork. In a drunken
stupor, he stumbled down the hall. He could finally put his plan into
action. He stumbled down the hall toward the elevator. Once aboard the
empty elevator, it took him a moment to figure out which button to
press. He was really drunk, and double vision had set in. He knew that
once all of the alcohol set into his bloodstream, his BAL would be near
the fatal limit. But the higher it was, the better his plan would work.
He got off the elevator and stepped into the ER. He immediately bumped
into Kerry Weaver. "What can I do for you, Robert?" Kerry asked,
sarcastically. "Actually nothing. I need to get some morphine from the
drug cabinet. We ran out of it upstairs." Robert said, lying through
his teeth. "Okay, let me know if you need anything else. I'll be in
Curtain Area 1 finishing up charts if you need me." Kerry said, walking
away. Robert breathed a sigh of relief as he headed toward the enclosed
area where the ER kept a small supply of drugs. Making sure nobody was
around, he pulled out a syringe and needle, that he had snuck from the
OR, out of his lab coat. He looked up to the drug counter, and after a
minute found what he was looking for. He found 100 mg of morphine, 200
of solumedrol, and 50 of demerol. All that combined, with the alcohol,
would certainly do the trick. He took the "note" he had written and
began injecting the drugs into the vein in his wrist. It took 5 minutes
for the drugs to enter his bloodstream, and cause cardiac arrest. As he
fell to the ground, he hit his head and split it wide open on the door.
He lay there, where nobody could see him, bleeding, unconcious, not
breathing, and virtually dead to the world around him....
____________________________________________
It had been almost 10 minutes since Kerry had last talked to Robert. He
had been unusually nice, which had never happened. She knew something
was wrong, because whenever he came down to the ER, he always verbally
harrassed her workers. She had heard nothing since she talked to him
last. She figured she'd go and check on him, make sure everything was
okay. As she walked down the corridor to the drug cabinent, she couldn't
help but feel this feeling of dread in the bottom of her stomach. As
she looked down the hallway, she saw a syringe, needle, and three
different containers strewn across the hall. When she turned to walk
into drug cabinent, she screamed when she found the crumpled body lying
on the floor.........
______________________________________________
Elizabeth Corday was sitting at her desk, having just finished catching
up on her work. She could finally go home. Her shift had been busy and
she was looking forward to going home, playing with Ella, and just not
having to worry about work for awhile. Shirley opened the door to
Elizabeth's office just a tad, and said "They need a surgical consult
in Trauma 1 down in the ER. They said it's important." she said before
dissappearing. Elizabeth groaned, since her shift was technically over.
But I guess one consult wouldn't hurt, so she grudgingly got up and
walked down to the ER. Once she was there, she could hear the shock of
the electrical paddles in the nearby trauma room. Whoever was in there
was in definite cardiac arrest. When Elizabeth walked in the trauma
room, she gasped. The person that was in cardiac arrest, that was
virtually dead, was Robert Romano.
__________________________________________________________________
So, what did you think? Should I continue with this story? PLEASE READ
REVIEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thanks for everything! :)
Robert Romano!!!! :)
Disclaimer: I don't own ANY of the ER character (unfortunately), NBC
does. So, I think you know the rest. This is just a story. Please don't
sue me, because I don't have anything that you want.
Summary: Death/Angst/Suicide
Author's Note: Be careful. It's quite depressing.... This is how I
portrayed Robert's childhood....
CHAPTER 1: ONE STEP CLOSER
________________________________________
"No, Daddy! Please don't do that to Mommy! Leave her alone!" pleaded
little Robbie, tugging at his fathers arms. Before Robbie could say
anything else, a strong blow to the jaw sent him flying into the wall
behind him. Sitting there, he began to cry. Not because his jaw hurt,
but because he could hear Mommy crying as Daddy hit her. Daddy would
come home drunk, yelling at Mommy as he stumbled through the door. And
everytime he tried to protect Mommy, Daddy beat him too. Robbie was
used to it. But, sometimes Daddy would beat him for no reason. But what
Robbie hated most, was trying to hide the bruises and cuts from the
teachers at school. He never had to worry about what the other kids
would say. Daddy never let him play with them anyway. He told him that
he wasn't good enough to play with the kids his age. So, Robbie taught
himself how to keep entertained with the few toys he had. Interupting
his thoughts, his father grabbed him by the hair and pulled him up so
that he was standing. Little Robbie began to brace himself, as he
assumed that his father was going to beat him again. Instead, his
father yelled at him, slurring his words, "Go get your ass in the damn
car, and don't say a fucking word until I get there!" Robbie knew damn
well not to contradict what his father had just told him, so he grabbed
his winter coat and went out the door to the car. Soon, both his mother
and father were heading toward the car. He could see Mommy crying. One
of her eyes was swollen shut, and her face was purple and blue. There
was blood running from a cut on her face. She and Dad got into the car,
with Dad complaining the whole way. Robbie wondered where they were
going this late at night. It was way after dark, and the streets were
icy as the snow fell. Robbie sat there, not saying a word as his father
talked about wasting his life and about how his "stupid" family was
too much of a burden. Daddy continued to keep driving, even when they
had gone outside city limits into the country. Daddy was swerving in
and out of the lanes as Mommy pleaded with him to stop. The arguing got
worse as the car swerved around the lanes, the snow blowing around the
car. Suddenly the lights from an oncoming truck shined brightly right
in front of them. Mommy screamed as Daddy tried frantically to swerve
out of the way. But it was too late, the truck smashed into the front
of their car. That's all that Robbie remembered before drifting out of
conciousness.
___________________________________________
Robert Romano woke up, startled. Heart pounding, cold sweat, afraid.
This was beginning to be a trend. Every night, it was the same
nightmare that came back to haunt him. The car wreck had happened about
this time of the year. As as each year since the accident passed, the
nightmares continued to plague him. Mom and Dad had died in that car
wreck. Dad had deserved too. The way that he beat Mom and him, he
deserved to die. Robert had no way of knowing that child abuse was
illegal, and he had put up with it since he could remember. But Mom on
the other hand, did not deserve to die. He remembered how they rushed
him to the hospital, and told him that neither his Mom nor his Dad had
survived the accident. And thus began the 10 years of foster care. He
had been 8 when the accident happened, and for the next ten years, he
was jostled between foster care families. And as soon as he turned 18,
he hit the ground running. Went to college. Finished med school. Did
internship and fellowship. Moved to Chicago. Worked at County, and
eventually became Chief of Staff. He was unable to save his parents'
lives, but by God, he would dedicate his life to saving others. And he
did. He had saved many lives. But he couldn't hide the fact that work
sucked. He never interacted with his co-workers. As much as he would
never admit it, he would give anything to hang out with the guys, drink
beer, and talk B.S. about work. And now because of his shitty attitude,
none of the women wanted anything to do with him. Relationships with
Elizabeth, Kerry, Chen, Finch, Lucy, Susan, and pretty much any other
woman in the department: ruined. No one to talk to at work. No one to
talk to at home. No one to come home to. No family. No friends. Nothing
He had spent almost all of his life like this. And he was tired of it.
Nobody cared about him. People could care less about him. And Robert
was tired of being treated like that. He would show them. He was sick
of this place. Sick of the world. He was sick of everything. Time to
end it all. He already had notes written out for everyone at work, and
he would put the plan into action right before his shift ended. He
painstakingly left notes around the house. He knew long after he was
gone, they'd come here, to his house, and they'd find the notes. Robert
snickered, putting his best pair of Dockers on. His favorite dark blue
shirt. His coat. His tie. His favorite shoes. He double checked the
house to make sure everything was set up. Before grabbing his briefcase
, he bent down to pet Gretel one last time. "Goodbye Gretel. Thanks
for nothing all these years.", he said before picking up his briefcase,
taking one last glance at his house, and then going out the door.
______________________________________________
Dr. Elizabeth Corday sat at her desk, frantically trying to catch up on
post-op labs and dictations. Work had been a living hell for the past
week, and she was barely making it through this shift as it is. She
heard a soft knock. "Come in!" she said, still engulfed in her work.
She looked up to see Kerry Weaver standing in front of her. "Hey Kerry,
what can I do for you?" Elizabeth said. "Actually, I wanted to talk to
you about something." Kerry said, looking slightly uncomfortable as
she closed the door. "It's about Robert." Kerry said. "Oh." Elizabeth
said as she rolled her eyes. "Listen, Kerry, whatever he said, just
ignore it. You know that Robert enjoys tormenting other people." "No,
it's not that. It's actually the exact opposite. Have you noticed his
attitude lately? He seems depressed. He's losing interest in things
that once interested him. His work is slipping and overall he's not
acting like himself. Maybe it's just me, but I'm worried." kerry said.
"Kerry, I think it is just you. Yes, I have noticed quite the charater
change, but nothing that would suggest that something was wrong. I'm
sure it's nothing, Kerry. But if there any any extreme changes, I'll
come talk to you." "Okay, thanks for your time, Elizabeth." Kerry said
before exiting Elizabeth's office. Elizabeth just shook her head and
went back to finishing her paperwork.
___________________________________________
Work sucks, Robert thought to himself. Today had been just like every
other day, only seemingly worse. He'd assisted on a bypass surgery,
done an exploratory, an appendectomy, and been down to the ER many
different times for consults. While he'd been down there, he'd managed
to piss almost everybody off, he smirked as he took another big swig of
vodka. Yes, he was aware that he was still on call and that he was
drinking, but frankly he didn't give a shit. The world didn't give a
shit about him, so why should he? He'd been sitting in his office for
the past 3 hours, drinking and finishing up paperwork. In a drunken
stupor, he stumbled down the hall. He could finally put his plan into
action. He stumbled down the hall toward the elevator. Once aboard the
empty elevator, it took him a moment to figure out which button to
press. He was really drunk, and double vision had set in. He knew that
once all of the alcohol set into his bloodstream, his BAL would be near
the fatal limit. But the higher it was, the better his plan would work.
He got off the elevator and stepped into the ER. He immediately bumped
into Kerry Weaver. "What can I do for you, Robert?" Kerry asked,
sarcastically. "Actually nothing. I need to get some morphine from the
drug cabinet. We ran out of it upstairs." Robert said, lying through
his teeth. "Okay, let me know if you need anything else. I'll be in
Curtain Area 1 finishing up charts if you need me." Kerry said, walking
away. Robert breathed a sigh of relief as he headed toward the enclosed
area where the ER kept a small supply of drugs. Making sure nobody was
around, he pulled out a syringe and needle, that he had snuck from the
OR, out of his lab coat. He looked up to the drug counter, and after a
minute found what he was looking for. He found 100 mg of morphine, 200
of solumedrol, and 50 of demerol. All that combined, with the alcohol,
would certainly do the trick. He took the "note" he had written and
began injecting the drugs into the vein in his wrist. It took 5 minutes
for the drugs to enter his bloodstream, and cause cardiac arrest. As he
fell to the ground, he hit his head and split it wide open on the door.
He lay there, where nobody could see him, bleeding, unconcious, not
breathing, and virtually dead to the world around him....
____________________________________________
It had been almost 10 minutes since Kerry had last talked to Robert. He
had been unusually nice, which had never happened. She knew something
was wrong, because whenever he came down to the ER, he always verbally
harrassed her workers. She had heard nothing since she talked to him
last. She figured she'd go and check on him, make sure everything was
okay. As she walked down the corridor to the drug cabinent, she couldn't
help but feel this feeling of dread in the bottom of her stomach. As
she looked down the hallway, she saw a syringe, needle, and three
different containers strewn across the hall. When she turned to walk
into drug cabinent, she screamed when she found the crumpled body lying
on the floor.........
______________________________________________
Elizabeth Corday was sitting at her desk, having just finished catching
up on her work. She could finally go home. Her shift had been busy and
she was looking forward to going home, playing with Ella, and just not
having to worry about work for awhile. Shirley opened the door to
Elizabeth's office just a tad, and said "They need a surgical consult
in Trauma 1 down in the ER. They said it's important." she said before
dissappearing. Elizabeth groaned, since her shift was technically over.
But I guess one consult wouldn't hurt, so she grudgingly got up and
walked down to the ER. Once she was there, she could hear the shock of
the electrical paddles in the nearby trauma room. Whoever was in there
was in definite cardiac arrest. When Elizabeth walked in the trauma
room, she gasped. The person that was in cardiac arrest, that was
virtually dead, was Robert Romano.
__________________________________________________________________
So, what did you think? Should I continue with this story? PLEASE READ
REVIEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thanks for everything! :)