The Dark Ride Saga – Chapter                     

                           Four

                      The Nature Of The Beast

                                                                                     Disclaimers-

"Let my people go free!":

I own No one but Cal. Well not really, that would be slavery. I leave the enslavement of poor defenceless superheroes and heroines to our evil overlords at Marvel who own everyone else mentioned.

"Hey maw! I'm onna TV! WOOHOO!":

You don't even need my permission to archive this. Just tell me were it is.

"Ooh, controversial!":

This gets a PG. all my stories do. Wouldn't want a small child to read a bad word. No one knows where the horror would end.

"Weird. The Golden Grahams tasted the same on the way down as they did on the way back up.":

There may seem to be continuity but there is not. Hey, that was practically Zen! How cool am I?

That's your horoscope for today:

There may indeed be spoilers, but they will be very old.

Wow.

That was my first thought.

And my second.

My third was 'I wonder if she's seeing anyone.'

Everyone knows anything's legal in Mexico. It's the American way. My fourth thought wasn't even legal there.

She was tall, muscular and had pink hair. People talk about supermodels with really fine bones structure, but none of 'em ever had anything like she did. Hers was external in some places, for a start. There was a crest on her forehead running along her eyebrows and down the bridge of her nose with a spike curving upwards from the centre, as well as one curving down each side of her head framing her face. She looked like she was wearing an elaborate facemask. Her collar bones had grown out and fused so she looked like she was also wearing a very ornate collar. One her right side three spines were growing from her back and around her shoulder. On her left two much bigger spikes were protruding. Three more spikes were protruding from her forearm.

I mentally shook myself.

'Say something cool! Say something cool!'

I managed a tentative

"Uh…hi?"

'Real cool. James Bond fears the day you come for his job.'

'Dammit brain, think of something that'll impress her or I'll stab you to death with a Q-tip.'

She was looking at me in a very strange way. I really hoped I'd just thought about stabbing my brain to death with a Q-tip and hadn't actually said anything out loud. I wondered if she'd believe I was delirious.

"Marrow."

I'll always remember that. It was the first time she ever spoke to me.

Well okay, technically it wasn't the first time she'd ever spoken to me. Since I'd been faking unconsciousness the first time and had my eyes shut it didn't count. If you don't see something it doesn't count. Everyone knows that. My reply was less than stunning though. Just a little.

"Uh…wha?"

From her tone, her opinion of me was sinking fast.

"Can you even speak? Try something with syllables. Go for Two. Three if you feel up to it."

At that point she was abusing sarcasm. I told her so.

I managed to pull myself to my feet.

I decided to be friendly. I smiled. She immediately dropped into a fighting stance as well as grabbing one of her shoulder spikes and with a sickening tearing noise ripped it out.

I know I'm not the best looking guy around or anything but having someone try to pull her skeleton out 'cos I smiled at her was kind of ego destroying.

Unfortunately she was now holding the spike like a weapon.

It looked unpleasantly sharp.

I realised I was stuck in a basement with an angry woman holding a very nasty looking bonesword.

Situation bad, getting worse.

Looking back though, I suppose her reaction was understandable.

I mean look at me, I'm nine feet tall, I have two very big wings, my left arm terminates in a claw comprised of three huge talons. My left forearm also comprises a plasma cannon that fires out of my palm.

Between the talons and the gun I can really give someone a bitchslap.

What else?

Oh yea.

I also have a tail.

It's prehensile.

And hooves. They're kinda like a horses.

I don't exactly have skin either. It's…well I call it bio-armour. It's like part of me, but it isn't. It's tough, light affords amazing protection against kinetic and energy attacks but its like going through life wrapped in thick cotton wool. Very thick cotton wool. I can barely feel anything at the best of times. Physical sensations are rare for me. It's a curse and a blessing.

Well…more of a curse.

A lot more.

I bear a striking resemblance to a Death Adder. My face anyway. Death Adders are like Rattlesnakes only a hell of a lot meaner. Instead of a few fangs I have lots of very big, very sharp teeth. Smiling makes me look like I'm about to chew your face off.

Not exactly reassuring but the best I can do.

My only redeeming feature is that my tongue has close to a five foot reach.

All in all I look like the bastard offspring of Jaws and the thing from Aliens.

Now can you understand why I avoid crowds? Why I avoid everyone?

I live in a world were people are persecuted for mutations as minor as differently coloured skin or hair.

You can imagine how society at large would react to me.

That has to be the biggest this-has-absolutely-nothing-to-do-with-the-story tangent I've ever gone off on.

Most depressing one too, 'specially towards the end.

Sorry.

Anyway.

I slowly raised my hands in a gesture of peace.

She relaxed a little.

Stood up. After a moments indecision she turned and headed towards the door. I could sense her internal conflict about turning her back on me. It felt strange that some who had just met me would trust me outright. It felt strange that anyone would trust me. I resolved that if I could help it I wouldn't do anything to make her regret that.

Finally she spoke.

"Come on. I'll introduce you to the others."