…When Pranks Go Bad…
By Zetta Zofia
Disclaimer: Not mine, belong to someone else, yadda-yadda-yadda.
Summary: When Pranks go bad, it's never good… Especially when you're dealing
with Age Potions.
Characters: MWPP, Lily Evans, Severus Snape, and More!
Who's Who: McGonagall threatened Peter, so he has to go to class today. Frank and Remus are supposed to play
Sirius and James, but Frank's still sick, and the full moon is one night
away... Isn't it awful that Severus
knows about Remus? Lily and Arabella
find out a little more about werewolves when Severus taunts 'Sirius' and
'James'...
Again, big happy thanks to all my reviewers!
(hands out pretty bouquets of flowers)
One more note: My laptop is screwy, so I'm forced to work off of another
computer. I don't know for sure when
the next (and last) chapter will be out.
Also, I'm having a few issues with the last chapter. Anything you want to see happen?
The Chalkboard
(http://www.sphosting.com/chalkboard/)
Everything MWPP!
Chapter Six
- Friday
"Want bubba."
"You just had one," Peter groaned. "Shush up and go back to sleep."
"Want blankie."
Frank moaned and tossed a stuffed animal towards James's bed. He missed by several meters, and the plush toy bounced and landed between the beds.
Peter sighed. "We have to act like James and Sirius today," he said unhappily. "Otherwise it'll be weird that they're really sick one day, and they're playing Quidditch another."
He picked James up off the bed and carried him over to Sirius.
The two screeched happily and began bashing each other with the stuffed animals.
"Oh, and going from what they were last night to perfectly healthy will be oh so natural," Frank argued, scowling at the two toddlers.
Remus sighed, only his mouth visible beneath the pile of blankets and pillows. "Pete's right," he moaned. "But Pete can't be missing any more school, or McGonagall'll go nutters. You and I are in no shape to do it."
"You think Lily and Arabella will do it?"
Remus shifted a little, rolling on his side. His breath was rather unsteady when he spoke again, and he was grinning a bit, the idea of it all amusing him, especially now that it was almost over. "I don't think we have a choice but to ask them, unless you can think of someone else who could do it. No Quidditch Players, because they can't miss the day before the match, none of their girlfriends- ex, current, or future, because they would kill us. Then, out of that short list, we'd have to find someone who'd actually be willing to do it… And how many people would, especially with all the abuse they'll take from the Slytherins today? It's got to be Lily and Arabella."
"That's something that gets me," Peter sighed. "Why is it that they're helping? I'd have thought they'd tell McGonagall in an instant."
This brought a small smirk to Remus's face. "Do you remember when you were real young? When you liked a girl, you'd hit her and then run away?"
It sat for a moment.
Then Frank turned and looked at him, and Peter's mouth dropped open. "You think they like Jim and Sir?"
Remus shrugged a bit. "Yes. Actually, I think Jim likes Lily, and the other way around. Sirius probably found out somehow and is keeping it a secret and helping Jim hide it. Sir's not the type to purposely aggravate a girl- any girl- unless there's a good reason for it. The only reasonable reason I can come up with is that he's covering for James- or he likes Bella too, but then, he likes a lot of girls. I'm not ruling out that he likes Arabella, though. But if you watch Jim long enough, you can see he doesn't hate Lily like he says he does."
Peter was wide-eyed. "Why wouldn't he tell us?"
"Because Sirius is James's best friend," Frank said, catching on. "And hell, Sirius probably figured it out himself. It's not like James is one to go around announcing who he likes and all."
Remus nodded. "It took us until he asked Tina out to find out he liked her. Er, rather, her finer attributes, anyhow."
"But why's he still tease her like this?" Peter wondered.
Remus sighed. "It's hard to stop. One year, he pranks her to death, the next year he stops? It'd be weird for him."
"But why would Sirius help?" Peter wondered. "I just have a hard time figuring out why they wouldn't just say something."
"And you're talking about Sirius and James," Remus reminded him. "They've got a way of over-complicating even the simplest of things."
Peter frowned. And then he jumped up off the bed, grinning. "Are we Marauders, or what? Come on, we've had the whole week to look for evidence, and we've been sitting on our arses… Neither of them keep journals, but they're sure to have something!"
Sirius screeched. "Um-fing!" He nearly fell off the bed trying to emulate Peter, and Peter dove to keep him up. He set Sirius on the floor, then James. "What's good for breakfast?" he asked. "I'll go get stuff, and then you guys can eat too, and then we'll explore a bit."
"Perfect timing then," Lily said from the door. She and Arabella each had a large tray laden down with breakfast foods. "You know, I've been thinking." Arabella closed the door behind her. "If they're old enough to talk- even just this much- they probably don't need bottles."
"True," Peter agreed. He cleared off one of the desks, sending parchment scraps and quills flying. On top of it all, two thick, heavy books landed with a sharp thud.
Lily and Arabella exchanged looks, then set the trays down on the desk Peter had just cleared off for them. "The house elves said they'd pick up the trays at about noon and bring enough lunch for whoever's staying with Sirius and James."
"Er…"
Remus forced himself to sit up, and saw Lily and Arabella's worried looks. He sighed. "I'm not going to make it to class today, and neither is Frank."
Lily straightened and Arabella pursed her lips. They both knew what was coming.
Remus continued. "McGonagall told Peter that if he missed any more class this week, she would give him detention." He glanced at them. "And, well, Sirius and James need to be in class today, still sick, but not as sick as yesterday."
"I haven't made it to all of my classes in a long, long time," Lily complained. "How do you expect me to keep up if we're off playing pretend?"
"Don't forget," Peter said. "We're doing your homework after this is all over. You can afford to relax."
"Right!" But Remus frowned a little. "But, ah… No suggestions about Siri and Jim's relationship with each other, all right? I assure you, they're quite straight, and would not see the humor."
Lily scowled. "Oh, come on," she complained. "You expect us to do this, but you won't let us have fun."
Remus gave them a tired grin. "Well, any detentions you get won't have to be served until after Jim and Siri are back…"
It took a lot of begging, but the girls finally agreed.
*~*~*
Lily fought back the urge to throw the Crystal ball at the Divination teacher, and instead settled for drawing rude pictures on her parchment.
Or rather, James's parchment.
Arabella snickered and showed off her own work.
The teacher was oblivious though, and did not add a detention onto the two they'd already gotten for the day.
Charms had been a rather fun class, as Lily had never actually taken the time to screw around during class before. But she'd decided that if Potter got away with it, well, he'd get away with it today, too.
Flitwick had not been amused when the feathers in the corner of the room came to life and decorated the classroom. (Though he'd been amazed that Sirius and James had pulled it off with such skill!)
That had been the first detention.
The second had been when Arabella took credit for setting off a dung bomb under Flitwick's desk, and she and Lily got in an argument about whose idea it was, while Flitwick, Peter and the rest of the class watched in shock and amusement.
Bored, Lily wrote out (in her sloppiest, most James-like handwriting) "Phony", and then, when everyone else was engrossed in watching the teacher, she sent it to the front of the classroom and neatly attached it to the teacher's shirt with a simple gluing charm.
Then she and Arabella exchanged looks and pretended to be taking notes, while the rest of the class tittered.
The class was a short one, and the teacher had not noticed the sign by the end of class.
Pleased, Peter, Lily and Arabella started to the Astrology classroom.
Snape showed up, for once without his goonies right by his side. They stayed back a ways.. "Potter, Black, and Pettigrew. Where's your little friend Lupin?"
"Sod off, Sevvy," Arabella said, smirking just like Sirius did.
"We're gonna be late," Peter said, sounding worried. He kept looking between Arabella and Lily and Severus, and his face was pale, and his eyes a little wider than they should have been.
Lily frowned. Something was going on that she didn't know about.
"Full moon tomorrow night," Severus sneered, giving them something of a knowing look. "You make sure Lupin's locked up all right, will you?"
Lily rolled her (James's) eyes. "If anyone gets locked up, it'll be you."
Severus sneered. "Fine then," he hissed. "Don't lock him up. I'll just be sure to have a nice, sharp silver knife. It would be such a tragedy…"
He waited for a reaction. Lily and Arabella exchanged confused looks, and Peter squeaked. "We gotta go!" he said, and grabbed their arms, pulling them back.
Severus stared after them. "What? No attempt to attack me? Black, you're so good at that, I thought you'd appreciate hearing another student would like to… encourage an accident to happen."
Peter pulled them along. "Tell him to get lost," he hissed. "Get real pissed."
Lily jerked her arm free easily. "Say it again, grease ball."
Severus still didn't look satisfied. "That's not right," he said slowly, taking a half step back. He stared at them for a very long moment, looking completely puzzled. "Black's the one to say that. And both of them should be out sick... but if it's taking this long to react..." He stared at them. "Who are you?"
Lily smirked as well. "Si, have you been spiking Sevvie's punch again?"
Severus still stared at them, looking confused. "What happened at the start of the year, Black?" he asked in a rather low voice.
Peter jerked on their arms, suddenly looking fearful. "Shut up, Snape," he squeaked. "Or-or they'll beat you up!"
Snape turned his gaze on Peter, but only for a moment. "Shut up, Pettigrew. Or I'll feed you to Lupin tomorrow."
Peter flinched, and Severus smirked slowly. "So," he murmured. "Who have we here?"
"Come on, Pete," Lily said, trying to sound as if she didn't care what Snape had said a moment before about Lupin, trying to act as though she didn't care about the implications of his statements. But her mind was racing as she added up the facts, and what she was finding…
The threesome began walking, leaving Snape behind, but his taunts still in Lily's mind. A quick glance over at her best friend showed similar thoughts, though it looked rather odd to see Sirius Black contemplating something so deeply.
They reached the Astrology classroom, which was not far from Divination.
Peter kept looking back warily.
"What was all that about?" Lily asked calmly.
Peter flinched. "Er... It's not important. But if, uh, he starts bothering you again, just get really mad at him. Sirius usually shoves him against the wall and stuff, and James and Remus have to hold him back so he doesn't get expelled." He looked worried. "Uh, don't hit hit though, no matter what. McGonagall and Dumbledore told Sirius that if he beat up Snape again, he'd get expelled. They had a, um, incident a while ago, and now they aren't allowed to get in fights."
Arabella scowled.
Peter stared. "Wow, you look just like him when he's thinking about Snape..."
They took their seats towards the back, and Peter sat across the aisle, where he and Remus normally sat.
Lily didn't dare talk about it, not in front of other people. She grabbed a parchment and began scribbling on it, and for the rest of the hour, she and Arabella exchanged notes on what was going on, and what had gone on, with Remus, Sirius, and Severus Snape.
*~*~*
"Would Dumbledore let him come?" Arabella asked softly as they made their way down the stairs from their room, carrying Sirius and James with them.
Lily set James down and let him hang on to her hand and toddle over to the couches by the fire.
They glanced around the Common Room before they sat down, wanting to be sure Remus wouldn't be there and hear them. "Apparently he would," Lily said. She frowned. "Maybe it's just because I'm Muggle-born, but I don't get what the big deal is. I mean, big deal, one night a month he has major PMS."
Arabella laughed nervously. "In our world, it's a really big deal." She glanced around and then leaned in closer. "Most werewolves end up going Dark. I'm amazed he's not in Slytherin, if it's true that he is one."
Lily scowled. "Arabella Annabelle Figg, are you telling me that you think a sweet boy like Remus should be with the likes of Severus Snape and that git, Malfoy?"
James chortled. "Git! Git!"
Sirius screeched with glee and toddled towards him.
Arabella looked abashed. "Well, I'm just saying. That's what most people think."
Lily frowned. "I just don't get why it's such a bad thing. I mean, it's not like they can control it or anything."
Arabella sighed. "You're probably right, Lil. But most of us were brought up to think that…werewolves should be avoided at all costs. They're dangerous, they're scary, and if they get mad…"
Lily rolled her eyes. "Oh, honestly. Muggles with witches, and witches with werewolves. It's pathetic!"
Arabella looked a little offended, and her tone was a lot colder. "It's a fact of life, Lily. They're not like us."
"Not!" James echoed, and then began going through someone's backpack.
Lily gave her a cold look and took the backpack away from him. "I'm not like you either. Are you going to start calling me a mudblood?"
Arabella stood up, looking very angry. "I'm trying to explain to you how it works in this world. It's great that you don't agree, Lil, but you have to accept that it's the way we've been brought up. Right or wrong, it's always been this way, and it always will. It's not like Muggles are perfect either. You're just as prejudice about certain things."
Lily pursed her lips. "I didn't say we weren't. I said that to be prejudice against… that particular creature is unfair."
Arabella put her hands on her hips and forced herself to lower her voice. "Treating sick people as though they're criminals is unfair too, but I've seen the Muggles do that."
Lily sighed. "And wizards do it too. But they also pick on werewolves and everything else that doesn't have a choice about what it is. Ara, I don't want to fight with you."
"We're not fighting," she snapped. "We're having a heated debate."
A soft voice interrupted them. "Who's winning?"
They both turned and found Remus watching them, a resigned look on his face that hinted that he had heard more than he was supposed to.
Lily looked sharply at Arabella, who shut her mouth and turned slightly away.
Lily looked at Remus again, and met his gaze.
He didn't say anything for a moment, then his mouth tightened a bit, and he looked resigned. "Come on upstairs. The potion's about an hour away from being ready, and I need to talk to you about… that."
"That that that that!" Sirius screeched. He'd grabbed a paperback book off the table and was happily chewing on it. Arabella made a face and took it from him, then picked him up. She dropped the book on the table and hoped the owner hadn't seen.
Lily grabbed James and took a quill away from him, and they silently followed Remus upstairs, each noting that he seemed quite exhausted. Quite a coincidence, it was the day before the full moon.
Only Peter was in the room, and he looked worried to see them.
"Frank went to the hospital," Remus explained as they entered. "We decided that he didn't seem to be getting any better, and it was worth it to get him checked out."
"Great," Lily said, rather unenthusiastically. She still wasn't too sure why she'd gotten better so much faster, but certainly didn't want to dwell on it. At least, not until Potter was around to torment with it.
Remus slowly sat on the edge of his bed, then slid back. Lily and Arabella took their seats on the edge of Sirius and James's beds, and they all sat so they could see each other. Peter looked even more worried than Remus, who was rather pale and looked quite upset. He sat cross legged on the end of his bed and looked at them. "Peter said that Snape was talking with you earlier."
"He was talking with James and Sirius, you mean," Arabella reminded him. She looked distinctly at ease, and crossed her arms in front of her.
Lily sighed and exchanged a long look with Arabella. Arabella looked away first, and Lily frowned. Did Ara really think that Remus was a horrible person all of a sudden? She hadn't thought so a week ago, when they had agreed to help out... She looked back at Remus, who seemed to be struggling with the words. "I'll make it easy for you," Lily said. Remus looked wary, and Peter, worried. "We filled in the blanks, all the stuff about the full moon, and how you're sick right now, and about once a month. You're a werewolf."
It wasn't a question, but he answered with a slight nod. "Dumbledore already knows. So do most of the teachers. James and Sirius and Peter figured it out at the start of second year. Snape figured it out last year and… uh, got it confirmed earlier this year."
Peter and Remus exchanged grim looks, and Lily wanted to ask about that, but sensed that they wouldn't answer even if she did.
Remus wouldn't quite look at either of them, though he other than that, he seemed perfectly comfortable. "Frank doesn't know. The only ones who know are, as I said, the staff, and those four, and, well, now you. It's supposed to be a secret."
"It'll stay that way," Lily promised.
Arabella nodded tersely. For a moment, the room was filled with tense silence.
Remus cleared his throat a little. He looked a little upset, and Lily sensed that he'd noticed Arabella's feelings. "I'm going to check on the potion," he said, and stepped into the bathroom. He closed the door behind him.
The silence was awful. Lily looked at Arabella, who crossed her arms and stubbornly looked away.
Peter jumped to his feet. "You're awful!" he exclaimed, his face red and his small eyes glaring at them. He'd been silent while Remus spoke, so Lily was a little startled by his sudden exclamation. He looked furiously at Arabella, who turned and met his gaze. He kept his voice low so that Remus wouldn't hear, and for a moment, struggled with words. Then he found them. "Do you have any idea how bad he already feels? That's why no one's supposed to know! Because of people like you!"
Arabella pursed her lips but stayed silent.
Peter continued, still livid. "It's not like it's his fault, anyway. He got attacked when he was a little kid, and his brother died because of it, because of the same werewolf. And then everyone found out and they had to leave town, and his life has been really bad! And now you come along, and make him feel even worse."
It was the only time either of them had ever seen Peter so emotional about something- at least something that wasn't threatening him.
Arabella scowled. "He's a werewolf!"
"He's a human being," Peter corrected. He seemed to remember himself then, and his entire demeanor relaxed back to normal, and he looked almost embarrassed for speaking at all. "He's really, really worried about people finding out and going crazy on him. You should apologize." He sat on his bed and slipped back into the shadows, avoiding their eyes.
Arabella stood up rather stiffly. "I'm going for a walk."
Lily did not offer to join her, and watched as she slammed the door on the way out.
"'Ella!" Sirius screeched, half running after her. He stumbled and fell on his bum. However, he found a pencil, and happily began chewing on it, his stumble forgotten.
James was happily playing with a little toy Quidditch player.
Lily sighed and looked at Peter, who was staring at his hands now. "You're really a good guy," she said quietly. "Not a lot of people would stand up for anyone like that."
Peter's face flushed a little red. "He's my friend."
Lily smiled a little, but then glanced at the lavatory door. "Is he all right?"
Peter shrugged. "He won't let anyone in. James is usually the best at getting him to talk, and then Sirius will cheer him up. They're not gonna be happy that you guys know. Much less that they weren't around to help out with the telling part."
They both looked at the toddlers who were cheerfully bashing each other with pillows.
"They'll get over it," Remus said from the bathroom door. Peter looked embarrassed for having been over heard, but Remus didn't notice. He was rubbing his temples again, looking quite pained. "I misjudged it. Two hours. So right after dinner."
Lily stood up and went to the doorway, and ushered him over to the bed. "Lie down," she ordered. "Peter, get a damp wash cloth, please."
He hurried to do as she ordered, and, much to Remus's amusement, Lily tucked him into bed, even pulling the sheet over him.
She put the cloth over his forehead. "Just close your eyes and rest," she said. "I can't imagine what it's like, but I'm sure it's awful. We'll be quiet. Do you need anything?"
He was hungry, but he shook his head. "Thanks."
She gave him a smile and pulled the curtains around his bed.
Then she and Peter sat down and played with Sirius and James.
*~*~*
Every year around Remus's birthday, the girls who liked him would bring him plates of goodies from the kitchens, and sweets from Hogsmeade. His favorites were Sugar Quills and cupcakes.
When Arabella returned to the room about an hour and a half after she'd left, she carried with her a plate with several cup cakes and Sugar Quills. She would never say the words, but it was her way of letting Remus know she was sorry.
He looked a lot better for her efforts, and they all sat down to discuss how the potion would work, a silent agreement to worry about the werewolf issue later on.
Remus was the one who'd done most of the research, so he explained. "Because we have to be careful how old they get, they have to actually drink the potion. Lily, if you could charm it to taste better…" Lily nodded slightly, frowning a bit as she thought about a charm that would work. "The potion will knock them out for a bit. It uses up a lot of energy because they'll be growing from such a young age. They'll probably be knocked out for the rest of the night, and won't wake up until morning."
They all looked disappointed.
"I really wanted to see Potter's face," Lily grumbled.
Arabella pouted. "And I really wanted to show Black the pictures."
Remus and Peter exchanged looks, and Remus shrugged. "They've got Quidditch in the morning, so they'll be up bright and early. Come by then, before the scrimmage."
"You have pictures?" Peter asked, grinning. "That'll be awesome. Did you make copies?"
Lily nodded, smirking. "More copies than they could dream of getting rid of."
"Let's get this done," Arabella said.
Remus hesitated. "Er… Maybe you two shouldn't be here. I mean… uh, well, they'll be growing back to their normal size, and clothing might be a problem."
Lily's lips twitched. "I don't want to miss them if they're conscious. We'll just turn our heads."
She and Arabella exchanged amused looks, and Remus and Peter exchanged worried ones.
But Remus decided that he didn't have a chance of winning an argument against them, not with how he felt at the moment. "Let's get everything ready first," he said instead. "Pete, can you get me two of those sipping cup things? They won't drink it fast enough if it's in a bottle."
Peter went to get the cups, Lily to charm the drink, and Arabella got the boys ready.
It took another few minutes, but then everything was set up and ready to go.
"You guys thirsty?" Remus asked, crouching down in front of James and Sirius. Both boys wore their regular size boxers and t-shirts, and they were all hoping that that would be decent covering for them.
"Bubba!" Sirius screeched, his eyes on the sipper cup. He reached out for it and took it from Remus, and then began sucking it down at once.
James, however, was not so eager, and continued playing with the toys they'd collected for them over the week.
Sirius sucked all of his down right away. "More!" he commanded.
But then he got a funny look on his face, and sat down. "Nap," he commanded, much quieter than they had seen before. He blinked several times, suddenly fighting off exhaustion.
"Let's get him in bed," Remus said. "We can't leave him lying on the floor all night."
"Who says?" Peter wondered, but picked him up and put him in bed. He pulled the covers over him. "How long does the potion take?"
"A while," Remus said, shrugging. "Okay, Jim, drink up."
James looked at him, and stood up, the clothes he wore barely staying on, and that only because of the Belt Charm they'd put on him. "No." He toddled over to the desk and began trying to pull the trays of the top of it.
"No, James," Remus scolded. "Come here."
James went under the desk. He sat down in the very back corner, brought his knees to his chin, and peered out at them with oddly serious eyes.
"I would have though Sirius would be the difficult one," Peter sighed. He glanced at Sirius again. "Whoah…" Sirius had grown, and looked to be about five or six years old now. "It's working."
Smirking, Lily and Arabella both moved to see.
"Can you get him?" Remus asked, his attention still on James. His face was white with tension and he was rubbing his temples again.
"Yeah," Peter said. "Just go lie down. I'll make sure he drinks it."
Remus nodded a bit. "Thanks." He sat down on his bed, leaning against the post so he could still see.
Peter took the cup and sat on the floor near the desk. "Hi, James," he said. "You thirsty?"
Little James shook his head.
On the bed across from Remus, Sirius snorted. He looked a little older now, about eight.
"I'll give you… a cookie."
Still, James shook his head. "Want mamma."
Peter sighed. "If you drink this up, I promise that you can go see your mum, all right?"
James's lower lip jutted out and he lowered his forehead to rest on his knees.
"Oh!" Arabella said. "Quidditch. Maybe he wants to go for a broom ride."
Peter was hopeful. "You wanna go for a broom ride, Jim?"
The little head looked up, and he looked excited. "Broom! Broom!"
Peter handed him the cup. "Drink up," he ordered kindly. "Then you can go fly all you want."
James snatched the cup out of his hands and slurped eagerly.
Sirius snorted in his sleep.
Remus glanced over at him and grinned. Sirius looked just like he had in their first year, except his hair was a bit longer.
James finished the cup. "Good job," Peter said.
"Broom."
"Nap first."
James's face crumpled up. "BROOM!"
Peter winced. "How about I let you hold onto the broom while you nap?"
James still pouted, but looked a little less annoyed. His eyes were already drooping.
Peter reached under the desk and pulled him out. He carried him over to the bed. "Just a minute," he said when James looked ready to cry.
Peter went to the closet and returned with the broom. James held it close to him and closed his eyes tight.
Then he opened them real fast,, and closed them again.
Lily grinned. "Ten galleons says he thinks he's going to go for a ride as soon as we're not looking."
Peter was puzzled. "But he'll be asleep, won't he?"
Remus sighed. "I think she meant that he thinks he's going to, and that's why he's going along with it."
Peter caught on. "Ohh…"
Sirius snorted and they all looked. He was just about to his proper age, and decently covered.
"He was a lot better the other age," Arabella said mournfully.
Remus shrugged. "After the tomorrow, we can send them back to toddlers. By accident, of course."
Peter looked interested. "You think they'd let us?"
Lily sighed. "A girl can hope."
Remus laughed. "A guy can too."
It took about ten more minutes for Sirius to reach his proper age. It was another ten after that before James was full size.
They did not seem to be going to wake up any time soon, even after Peter shook James's shoulder, so the girls sadly left for their room, hoping they would see them first thing in the morning.
The Chalkboard
(http://www.sphosting.com/chalkboard/)
Everything MWPP!
One chapter left!
Chapter Seven
- Saturday
The Quidditch Scrimmage, the embarrassment, and a whole bunch more! (Ideas
welcome!)
