"You know, I trusted you ."
" What are you talking bout Lad?"
" I trusted you to take care of Jesse, and I have always looked up to you, but if anything , anything at all happens to Jesse I swear I will never forgive you." I could hear Letty gasp in the background as I got up, and walked away. I had always thought the sun rose, and set in Dom's presence, but sometimes things change. I winced inwardly at the pain I saw in his eyes, cause i knew I couldn't back down after saying something like that . The words could never be taken back. There was a feeling hanging in the air, I just knew something was going to happen to the team soon. My mouth almost dropped open when Jesse walked in as I was leaving. His eyes were blood shot, and face pale. I had done this to him. Seeing me start to crumble, Mia came down the stairs, and gently grabbed my arm guiding me to the car for work.
"We're gone." she yelled signaling our departure.
A week later
"How you living girl?" Letty asked as she walked into the kitchen.
"Wha? I''m alright," I said turning away to hide the tears forming. It had been two weeks and me and Jesse just could not stop arguing.
"Don't lie to me Ladie," She siad forcing me to look into her eyes.
"What the hell do you want me to say ! You know i'm not alright, I'll deal , just give me some space!"
"Damn!" Letty said kicking the refrigerator door. Things had gotten out of hand last night, and she was really starting to worry.
The night before
I was sitting at the table drinking a glass of water when Jesse walked into the kitchen with a beer. There was another party going on because Dom had once again won a race. I hadn't raced since that last night with the Tran family. I just got the feeling Ii should take things easy for awhile.
"Hey Ladie."
"Hey Jesse," I said nodding slightly as I gritted my teeth, I had how polite we were we never used full names.
"Lad, this has gone on long enough ," he said turning from the ice bin to face me.
" Jess, I don't like it either," I said sighing as I rested my head against the coolness of the wooden table.
"Then why are you making this so difficult."
" You know how I feel about the situation," I said starring into my glass. If I made direct contact in him I would lose all resolve, and devour him like a man in the desert with a glass of water.
"Ladie you know I can't stop now. "
"That's bull, and you know it!" I said clenching the glass.
" I can't just leave them hanging like that!" We had this argument almost every day, the same problem expressed with different words.
"Damnit Jesse I need you !" I said throwing the half full glass at his head. The minute the glass left my hand I covered my mouth in shock. It shattered just a few inches from his face, and his jaw remained lowered. A few seconds later Dom ran in .
"That's enough Ladie Marie!" He yelled dragging me through the kitchen, and up to V's room. I cried myself to sleep that night, but I knew the tears could never undo what I had done. So many things were happening tome , it was like someone else had taken over my body .I said ,and did , and said things I really didn't want to. I was so angry, this just wasn't me, and even though i hadn't told anyone I had been sick latley . The whole situation was literally tearing me apart from the inside out
Things were even more strained after that night; and I grew even more irritable. In public Jesse, and I were the same loving couple, holding hands: and sharing kisses. N o matter what was really going on inside the group, we always managed to look strong, and confident to others. We had to after the break with the Tran family a few months ago. It scared me how badly we were functuioning without each other. I was extremly depressed, and I rarely went out , outside of working. I spent alot of time moping, and eating.. the pounds were really started to pack on. The other day I was wearing a pair of my favorite jeans , and V made a comment.
" Did you pour yourself into those Lad?"
"Shut up," I said lightly punching his arm.
Jesse was really starting to frighten me, i'm thinking of giving up the cause cpmpletly. No disagreement can be worth this. I have never seen Jesse look so lost, and nervous. There are times when he literaly shakes, as he glances around nervously, and fiddles with his fingers. I'm not sure if is cause of the state our Marriage is in , or the "job" the team is doing. I guess secretly I'm praying its our marriage.
" What are you talking bout Lad?"
" I trusted you to take care of Jesse, and I have always looked up to you, but if anything , anything at all happens to Jesse I swear I will never forgive you." I could hear Letty gasp in the background as I got up, and walked away. I had always thought the sun rose, and set in Dom's presence, but sometimes things change. I winced inwardly at the pain I saw in his eyes, cause i knew I couldn't back down after saying something like that . The words could never be taken back. There was a feeling hanging in the air, I just knew something was going to happen to the team soon. My mouth almost dropped open when Jesse walked in as I was leaving. His eyes were blood shot, and face pale. I had done this to him. Seeing me start to crumble, Mia came down the stairs, and gently grabbed my arm guiding me to the car for work.
"We're gone." she yelled signaling our departure.
A week later
"How you living girl?" Letty asked as she walked into the kitchen.
"Wha? I''m alright," I said turning away to hide the tears forming. It had been two weeks and me and Jesse just could not stop arguing.
"Don't lie to me Ladie," She siad forcing me to look into her eyes.
"What the hell do you want me to say ! You know i'm not alright, I'll deal , just give me some space!"
"Damn!" Letty said kicking the refrigerator door. Things had gotten out of hand last night, and she was really starting to worry.
The night before
I was sitting at the table drinking a glass of water when Jesse walked into the kitchen with a beer. There was another party going on because Dom had once again won a race. I hadn't raced since that last night with the Tran family. I just got the feeling Ii should take things easy for awhile.
"Hey Ladie."
"Hey Jesse," I said nodding slightly as I gritted my teeth, I had how polite we were we never used full names.
"Lad, this has gone on long enough ," he said turning from the ice bin to face me.
" Jess, I don't like it either," I said sighing as I rested my head against the coolness of the wooden table.
"Then why are you making this so difficult."
" You know how I feel about the situation," I said starring into my glass. If I made direct contact in him I would lose all resolve, and devour him like a man in the desert with a glass of water.
"Ladie you know I can't stop now. "
"That's bull, and you know it!" I said clenching the glass.
" I can't just leave them hanging like that!" We had this argument almost every day, the same problem expressed with different words.
"Damnit Jesse I need you !" I said throwing the half full glass at his head. The minute the glass left my hand I covered my mouth in shock. It shattered just a few inches from his face, and his jaw remained lowered. A few seconds later Dom ran in .
"That's enough Ladie Marie!" He yelled dragging me through the kitchen, and up to V's room. I cried myself to sleep that night, but I knew the tears could never undo what I had done. So many things were happening tome , it was like someone else had taken over my body .I said ,and did , and said things I really didn't want to. I was so angry, this just wasn't me, and even though i hadn't told anyone I had been sick latley . The whole situation was literally tearing me apart from the inside out
Things were even more strained after that night; and I grew even more irritable. In public Jesse, and I were the same loving couple, holding hands: and sharing kisses. N o matter what was really going on inside the group, we always managed to look strong, and confident to others. We had to after the break with the Tran family a few months ago. It scared me how badly we were functuioning without each other. I was extremly depressed, and I rarely went out , outside of working. I spent alot of time moping, and eating.. the pounds were really started to pack on. The other day I was wearing a pair of my favorite jeans , and V made a comment.
" Did you pour yourself into those Lad?"
"Shut up," I said lightly punching his arm.
Jesse was really starting to frighten me, i'm thinking of giving up the cause cpmpletly. No disagreement can be worth this. I have never seen Jesse look so lost, and nervous. There are times when he literaly shakes, as he glances around nervously, and fiddles with his fingers. I'm not sure if is cause of the state our Marriage is in , or the "job" the team is doing. I guess secretly I'm praying its our marriage.