Chapter 4

Ryoko sat on the roof, tears spilling from her eyes and slightly blurring her vision as she watched the stars overhead wink at her. She hugged her knees to her chest and talked out loud to comfort herself. "She looked just like, that girl, the one who begged me to stop. Not for her life, but for her parents, and her friends, and even her kitty-cat. She was the only one who asked me to think of someone other than themselves." She remembered that scene to this day, and probably would until she died. All of it was clear as crystal, lying dormant in her subconscious mind, only to resurrect when she slept. The guilt, the horrible, consuming guilt of having all of those lives and all of that collective blood stain her hands. She began telling her tale, as if she asked some person for understanding, although no one was there.

"It was a spring afternoon. I remember I was descending onto some innocent planet for a raid. I hadn't done one personally in a while, and… he didn't want my image to fade, so he was having me destroy some towns myself. I… I had just finished devastating one house, on the edge of a glade, when a small girl came out and looked up at me and, she begged for me to stop, just like Sasami did. She had light indigo hair that reached to her waist, and violet eyes." Ryoko shuddered. "Those eyes… they bored into me, they brought awareness into my controlled fury. They touched my soul." Ryoko stopped her narrative for a moment while the sobs racked her slender body. "S-she asked me why I was doing this. I told her because I had to, and that she was next. She looked up at me with great sadness and, she agreed that if I had to kill her, it was okay, as long as I didn't kill her mommy or daddy, or her best friend Janice, or her kitten Sparks. I-I-I…" Ryoko couldn't finish her sentence as she started weeping into her hands. Her all-consuming grief tore at her, gutting her from the inside. Ryoko curled up into a ball and sat there, shivering and crying, trying to ease the pain of what she had done.

Washu paced her lab, restless, trying to find a solution, heck even the problem to her daughter's 'relapses'. And the unbearable grief over the mindlink wasn't helping any. Finally she just couldn't take it anymore and temporarily severed the mindlink, and went outside of her lab to distract herself.

She opened the door cautiously, and peeked around before she stepped out. As fun as the afternoon's events were, she didn't want to repeat them. She stepped out in the hall and then considered retreating back into her sanctuary when she heard Ayeka's high voice whining about Ryoko lazing about and not even helping with the dinner dishes, and how she bet that that 'Awful Space Pirate' was out getting drunk as usual. Washu gritted her teeth at the princess and wondered if she had ever experienced the grief that came from destroying a whole planet.

"Now Ayeka, that isn't very nice to say!" Washu heard Sasami scold. Washu chuckled and stepped into the kitchen adding,

"No, it's not, especially when her mother is in the room." Washu grinned internally as she saw the princess flounder and be embarrassed at being caught saying rude and unprincessly types of things. "But that's okay Ayeka" Washu winked. "I forgive you, I know how trying my dear daughter can be at times."

"'At times?' How about all the time?" Washu pretended not to hear the comment that Ayeka snorted under her breath. "Well, that's the last of the dishes Sasami, I'm going to go watch some TV now."

"Okay sister! I'll finish cleaning up here!" Sasami waved cheerily as Ayeka glided out of the room. "Now, what do you want Washu?" Sasami looked at her with a merry question in her eyes.

"Oh, don't mind me, I'm sure you're already busy. I'll just help myself to the leftovers in the fridge."

Sasami giggled. "Oh don't be silly! I'll cook something up for you quick as a wink!" She started pulling out pans and pots and asked Washu to bring a few things from the refridgerator. "There's nothing better for dinner than having a warm, fresh meal, and you haven't had one in a while, since you're always in your lab." Sasami quipped with a slightly scolding tone.

"Yes Sasami-sama. I promise that I will be on time for dinner tomorrow." Washu recited with a school-girl tone.

Sasami laughed cheerfully and winked at Washu. "I'll hold you to that, thanks." She laughed again then began meticulously chopping vegetables, although you really couldn't tell that she was being precise about it, because she was going at about the speed of a salad shooter. She smiled when she saw Washu sneak up beside her to steal some tidbits from the cutting board. Sasami ignored the little hand that kept zipping from the board and back, after all, a few cucumber slices weren't going to matter much. She started humming the tune from this afternoon, the one that her mother had taught her when Washu stopped mid-snatch.

Washu's hand hovered precariously over the cutting board while she watched Sasami with a gaping mouth. Sasami peered quizzically at the genius and politely asked what was wrong. Washu stammered out "T-t-that song… the one you were humming… where did you hear that?"

Sasami shrugged. "I don't know, it's just a nursery song that my mom always used to sing to me, I don't even remember the words anymore."

Washu nodded, "okay, well, thank you for the though Sasami, but apparently I'm going to have to have a cold meal anyways, I have to go call Jurai…" Washu ran out of the room before she could hear Sasami reply,

"Oh! It's no biggie, when I'm finished I'll just let Mihoshi deliver it to you!"