A/N - I have nothing to say. Just r/r please, even if it's just to shut me
up.
Renee sat upon a bench at Kings Cross Station, hood drawn up over her head and playing absently with the strings of her sweater. Every so often she would brush an auburn streaked brown curl out of her face, and wipe tiredly at her eyes, so dark a brown they almost appeared black.
She glanced at a nearby clock; it was ten o'clock. She sighed and her fingers once again left the strings and rubbed at the side of her nose, the centerpiece of a rather defined face, with pale pink lips and high cheekbones. Her eyebrows were thin and arched, and the eyes they topped glanced wearily at the space between platforms nine and ten. She figured she could board in half an hour. She'd already been here for, oh, hours already. /He/ had brought her here early, very early. It had been midnight where she lived - used to live - in Quebec, Canada, when she had left, and when they arrived the time in London had been four in the morning. He had not been with her when she'd arrived, though He'd been the one who brought her. It seemed He could never remain past three, and it seemed time change applied even to Him.
Who He was, Renee could not quite say. 'He' was the only way in which she thought of Him, never had a name been necessary, or given, for she never spoke of Him to anyone. He was hers and hers alone, her secret, just as she was His.
To anyone else, it may seem that they were lovers, it was not so. He had always been there, not aging a day, it seemed, ever since she was a child. Ever since her mother died... she remembered that day, oh, how she remembered. That had been the first time she'd ever truly cried, the first time she'd felt that kind of loss and helplessness, cried because it had never hurt so much on the inside. He had been there, comforting, just as he still is. When she cried, and even when she didn't, when she steeled herself and refused to show emotion, he knew, he came, and he provided affection. Not the affection of a mother or father, a sister or brother and not the affection of a lover. She didn't know quite how to place it. It was just, affection, plain and simple.
The only condition was that she kept her eyes shut in his presence. It was an unspoken rule that she had somehow always known. She didn't understand the reasoning behind it, but it was a small price to pay for his comfort, and so she obeyed without question.
Renee glanced once again at the clock. It was twenty after. She'd board in ten minutes. Her gaze wandered again, and she unconsciously began playing with the strings of her sweater once again. The red phase screech owl tied to her wrist by jesses and anklet hooted softly, begging treats, and drew the attention of a passing muggle, whom she glared at while slipping the owl a morsel.
Finally, as the long hand on the clock neared the six, she gathered up her sole duffel bag and stood, stretching out the kinks in her muscles. Casually she walked through the barrier to platform 9 3/4, noting as she did that more children, owls with many of them, had begun drifting her way, no doubt Hogwarts Students.
The platform was just beginning to fill up, and Renee quickly found an empty compartment, dropping her bag carelessly on the floor and flopping tiredly onto the cushioned seat. Her owl, Fukurou, made a sound of annoyance and resettled on her fist. Eyes half closed, Renee slumped against the window and stroked the soft feathers on his stomach in apology. She turned her head to the window and watched absently as more students and their parents filtered onto the platform, sparing a brief nod to three who joined her in the compartment. They, in turn, offered no more than brief introductions, and when the train began moving, they were engaged in a game of wizard's chess.
Renee merely stared out the window for the beginning of the journey, buying nothing when the cart rolled by and offered treats. However, her silent reverie was broken as one of them spoke rather awkwardly to her.
"So...um...that's a nice owl. What's his name?"
"Fukurou."
The boy nodded uncomfortably, looking for something else to say in the hollow silence that followed. He was saved, however, by the girl Renee remembered to be named Mandy.
"Fukurou?" Renee vaguely wondered if there was an echo in here. "Isn't that Japanese? Meaning..." The girls eyebrows furrowed as she thought. "...owl? That's kind of weird, don't you think? I mean, it's like calling your dog, 'dog', or your cat, 'cat'."
Renee considered snapping bad temperedly at the girl, but instead merely gave her a mild look of disdain and turned back to the window.
Few words were shared from that point on. Occasionally Renee pulled herself out of her thoughts long enough to give one person or another a brief suggestion on their chess match, but for the most part she just sat and watched. Mandy appeared to be the reigning champion so far, but as Terry, the first boy who had spoken, moved in to place her in check, the train ground to a stop, the chess board sliding off the seat before anyone thought to catch it. With a few muttered curses all three of them got down on their hands and knees to retrieve the pieces which were all scurrying rapidly for cover.
And then a deathly silence filled the compartment as the lights went out, casting them all into darkness.
No one moved inside the compartment, listening intently to people yelling questions out of their compartments, but no answers seemed to be given. Then slowly, her companions returned to their seats, all but one (it was impossible to tell who in the dark) who felt their way to the door and opened it, joining the yelled conversation which seemed to be yielding no conclusion.
"Ouch!" There were sounds of someone being knocked roughly into the wall.
"What?" Mandy's voice was discernable in the gloom, but was ignored by the person at the door and the newcomer.
"Watch where you're going! Who is that?"
"Terence."
"Higgs?"
"Yeah. You guys know what's going on?"
"No more than anyone else, it seems." As Renee's eyes adjusted, she was able to make out a male form in the dark. As he entered the compartment and turned to close the door, Renee was overcome by an overwhelming sense of dread. His hand halted as it touched the handle.
"Do you feel that?"
Terence's question went unanswered, for not a second had passed when a dark shape walked, no, floated past their compartment.
Renee was cold. That was all she could think. Her eyes unfocused and she shivered, before she tensed and images passed before her eyes so vividly it didn't seem to matter that they were still open, wide with shock.
/A blond man, cold smile and even colder eyes, taking her father away, sending him to London.../
/The sickeningly white walls, and the doctor, telling her that her mother had died.../
/The realization that her father wasn't coming back.../
/The foster homes, the beatings, the blame, and when she couldn't take it anymore, the streets.../
And then it was over.
'Kurou, sitting on her knee, hooted questioningly, if rather meekly, as he also trembled, preening his feathers in agitation.
Unsteadily, she hugged the owl to her chest, as best as one can hug an owl, and said nothing.
Renee stood outside the doors of the great hall, listening indifferently to the chatter inside. As the sorting was concluded, she caught the smell of a great feast, reminding her that she hadn't eaten since yesterday. Mentally commanding her stomach to be silent, she reached into the duffel bag at her side, pulling out a rather insignificant looking paper, yellowing and somewhat worn around the edges. Scanning down the page, she found the familiar line and glared at it bad-temperedly.
Professor Severus Snape, Hogwarts
The sole line had gotten her this far, but that was hardly enough. Professor, it read. Could it not have been more specific? This castle was huge, probably even bigger than it outwardly appeared. It was a magical building, after all. How was she to know where to begin looking? Her five year old self remembered next to nothing of her father, not what subject he would most likely be teaching, nor even what he looked like. And she most certainly was not about to barge in among all those people and demand to know which one of them he was.
Sighing, she stuffed the paper back into the duffel bag and began her own investigation of the school.
Not ten minutes later she found herself back at the great hall for the third or fourth time. Growling under her breath, barely restraining the urge to kick at a nearby suit of armor, she walked up a flight of stairs she was sure she hadn't been up before.
Suddenly she stiffened, listening motionless to the sound of clicking shoes behind her. As they neared, she ducked through a door and pressed herself against the interior wall, holding her breath. She listened, teeth clenched, as the footsteps approached, then receded back down the corridor. Her inheld breath was released in a whoosh as the echoing noise faded away.
Gazing around the room she had just entered, Renee had to marvel at her luck. It appeared to be a staff room of sorts, complete with a list displaying all of the staff employed and the lesson they taught. Grinning, she walked over to it, running her finger down it, trying to locate a familiar name. Hagrid...McGonagall...Flitwick...Ah, there it is... No, Sinistra... Trelawny... Snape. There. She tapped a finger over it for a moment, then moved horizontally to the included information.
Professor Severus Snape -------- Potions Master -------- Dungeons
Still smiling, Renee slipped back out of the room. The Dungeons shouldn't be too difficult to find, as long as she headed down she shouldn't have a problem.
Back outside the Great Hall, Renee called down her owl from the rafters, promising him a nice treat once she'd found what, or rather, who, she was looking for. Listening for a moment, the feast appeared to be in full swing. And so she took the downwards staircase, somewhat foreboding and gloomy, to wait. And wait she would, for however long it took for him to come.
Renee sat upon a bench at Kings Cross Station, hood drawn up over her head and playing absently with the strings of her sweater. Every so often she would brush an auburn streaked brown curl out of her face, and wipe tiredly at her eyes, so dark a brown they almost appeared black.
She glanced at a nearby clock; it was ten o'clock. She sighed and her fingers once again left the strings and rubbed at the side of her nose, the centerpiece of a rather defined face, with pale pink lips and high cheekbones. Her eyebrows were thin and arched, and the eyes they topped glanced wearily at the space between platforms nine and ten. She figured she could board in half an hour. She'd already been here for, oh, hours already. /He/ had brought her here early, very early. It had been midnight where she lived - used to live - in Quebec, Canada, when she had left, and when they arrived the time in London had been four in the morning. He had not been with her when she'd arrived, though He'd been the one who brought her. It seemed He could never remain past three, and it seemed time change applied even to Him.
Who He was, Renee could not quite say. 'He' was the only way in which she thought of Him, never had a name been necessary, or given, for she never spoke of Him to anyone. He was hers and hers alone, her secret, just as she was His.
To anyone else, it may seem that they were lovers, it was not so. He had always been there, not aging a day, it seemed, ever since she was a child. Ever since her mother died... she remembered that day, oh, how she remembered. That had been the first time she'd ever truly cried, the first time she'd felt that kind of loss and helplessness, cried because it had never hurt so much on the inside. He had been there, comforting, just as he still is. When she cried, and even when she didn't, when she steeled herself and refused to show emotion, he knew, he came, and he provided affection. Not the affection of a mother or father, a sister or brother and not the affection of a lover. She didn't know quite how to place it. It was just, affection, plain and simple.
The only condition was that she kept her eyes shut in his presence. It was an unspoken rule that she had somehow always known. She didn't understand the reasoning behind it, but it was a small price to pay for his comfort, and so she obeyed without question.
Renee glanced once again at the clock. It was twenty after. She'd board in ten minutes. Her gaze wandered again, and she unconsciously began playing with the strings of her sweater once again. The red phase screech owl tied to her wrist by jesses and anklet hooted softly, begging treats, and drew the attention of a passing muggle, whom she glared at while slipping the owl a morsel.
Finally, as the long hand on the clock neared the six, she gathered up her sole duffel bag and stood, stretching out the kinks in her muscles. Casually she walked through the barrier to platform 9 3/4, noting as she did that more children, owls with many of them, had begun drifting her way, no doubt Hogwarts Students.
The platform was just beginning to fill up, and Renee quickly found an empty compartment, dropping her bag carelessly on the floor and flopping tiredly onto the cushioned seat. Her owl, Fukurou, made a sound of annoyance and resettled on her fist. Eyes half closed, Renee slumped against the window and stroked the soft feathers on his stomach in apology. She turned her head to the window and watched absently as more students and their parents filtered onto the platform, sparing a brief nod to three who joined her in the compartment. They, in turn, offered no more than brief introductions, and when the train began moving, they were engaged in a game of wizard's chess.
Renee merely stared out the window for the beginning of the journey, buying nothing when the cart rolled by and offered treats. However, her silent reverie was broken as one of them spoke rather awkwardly to her.
"So...um...that's a nice owl. What's his name?"
"Fukurou."
The boy nodded uncomfortably, looking for something else to say in the hollow silence that followed. He was saved, however, by the girl Renee remembered to be named Mandy.
"Fukurou?" Renee vaguely wondered if there was an echo in here. "Isn't that Japanese? Meaning..." The girls eyebrows furrowed as she thought. "...owl? That's kind of weird, don't you think? I mean, it's like calling your dog, 'dog', or your cat, 'cat'."
Renee considered snapping bad temperedly at the girl, but instead merely gave her a mild look of disdain and turned back to the window.
Few words were shared from that point on. Occasionally Renee pulled herself out of her thoughts long enough to give one person or another a brief suggestion on their chess match, but for the most part she just sat and watched. Mandy appeared to be the reigning champion so far, but as Terry, the first boy who had spoken, moved in to place her in check, the train ground to a stop, the chess board sliding off the seat before anyone thought to catch it. With a few muttered curses all three of them got down on their hands and knees to retrieve the pieces which were all scurrying rapidly for cover.
And then a deathly silence filled the compartment as the lights went out, casting them all into darkness.
No one moved inside the compartment, listening intently to people yelling questions out of their compartments, but no answers seemed to be given. Then slowly, her companions returned to their seats, all but one (it was impossible to tell who in the dark) who felt their way to the door and opened it, joining the yelled conversation which seemed to be yielding no conclusion.
"Ouch!" There were sounds of someone being knocked roughly into the wall.
"What?" Mandy's voice was discernable in the gloom, but was ignored by the person at the door and the newcomer.
"Watch where you're going! Who is that?"
"Terence."
"Higgs?"
"Yeah. You guys know what's going on?"
"No more than anyone else, it seems." As Renee's eyes adjusted, she was able to make out a male form in the dark. As he entered the compartment and turned to close the door, Renee was overcome by an overwhelming sense of dread. His hand halted as it touched the handle.
"Do you feel that?"
Terence's question went unanswered, for not a second had passed when a dark shape walked, no, floated past their compartment.
Renee was cold. That was all she could think. Her eyes unfocused and she shivered, before she tensed and images passed before her eyes so vividly it didn't seem to matter that they were still open, wide with shock.
/A blond man, cold smile and even colder eyes, taking her father away, sending him to London.../
/The sickeningly white walls, and the doctor, telling her that her mother had died.../
/The realization that her father wasn't coming back.../
/The foster homes, the beatings, the blame, and when she couldn't take it anymore, the streets.../
And then it was over.
'Kurou, sitting on her knee, hooted questioningly, if rather meekly, as he also trembled, preening his feathers in agitation.
Unsteadily, she hugged the owl to her chest, as best as one can hug an owl, and said nothing.
Renee stood outside the doors of the great hall, listening indifferently to the chatter inside. As the sorting was concluded, she caught the smell of a great feast, reminding her that she hadn't eaten since yesterday. Mentally commanding her stomach to be silent, she reached into the duffel bag at her side, pulling out a rather insignificant looking paper, yellowing and somewhat worn around the edges. Scanning down the page, she found the familiar line and glared at it bad-temperedly.
Professor Severus Snape, Hogwarts
The sole line had gotten her this far, but that was hardly enough. Professor, it read. Could it not have been more specific? This castle was huge, probably even bigger than it outwardly appeared. It was a magical building, after all. How was she to know where to begin looking? Her five year old self remembered next to nothing of her father, not what subject he would most likely be teaching, nor even what he looked like. And she most certainly was not about to barge in among all those people and demand to know which one of them he was.
Sighing, she stuffed the paper back into the duffel bag and began her own investigation of the school.
Not ten minutes later she found herself back at the great hall for the third or fourth time. Growling under her breath, barely restraining the urge to kick at a nearby suit of armor, she walked up a flight of stairs she was sure she hadn't been up before.
Suddenly she stiffened, listening motionless to the sound of clicking shoes behind her. As they neared, she ducked through a door and pressed herself against the interior wall, holding her breath. She listened, teeth clenched, as the footsteps approached, then receded back down the corridor. Her inheld breath was released in a whoosh as the echoing noise faded away.
Gazing around the room she had just entered, Renee had to marvel at her luck. It appeared to be a staff room of sorts, complete with a list displaying all of the staff employed and the lesson they taught. Grinning, she walked over to it, running her finger down it, trying to locate a familiar name. Hagrid...McGonagall...Flitwick...Ah, there it is... No, Sinistra... Trelawny... Snape. There. She tapped a finger over it for a moment, then moved horizontally to the included information.
Professor Severus Snape -------- Potions Master -------- Dungeons
Still smiling, Renee slipped back out of the room. The Dungeons shouldn't be too difficult to find, as long as she headed down she shouldn't have a problem.
Back outside the Great Hall, Renee called down her owl from the rafters, promising him a nice treat once she'd found what, or rather, who, she was looking for. Listening for a moment, the feast appeared to be in full swing. And so she took the downwards staircase, somewhat foreboding and gloomy, to wait. And wait she would, for however long it took for him to come.