Standard Disclaimers Apply.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Makenai!
That was I always say, whatever the challenge was. Whether any muscle-straining sport came, I never backed down.
I was there to face it. No matter what. No fear tracing my face. Such words as 'defeat' is out of the vocabulary.
But I was nearly lost when I thought I could win anything.
All of them was filled with disbelief at my abilities. What? A skinny young girl managed to break a record? How it can be? That was their expressions written all over their face. They thought I was cheating. It was farce. It took all of my effort at that time to win anything. Even without my gate power, there must have been a somersault of emotions pouring in me. But it all reached to a conclusion. That I won't give up because I want everyone to be happy. That was all I wanted. But it all
dispersed when doubt mingled in my heart-felt earnings.
So they didn't know how much it stabbed me.
No big deal to them. Time will pass, believing that my bitterness will go with it. I'm still a kid. It's better that it would be forgotten.
No one seems to mind.
But he came.
And I realized that I was running away.
I forgot other people's smiles.
I'm very sorry that he had a very hard time opening this truth to me. He had to get through the purple sores to make me realize that I was just making a fool out of myself. I will always win, and it doesn't matter to anybody. But him...oh, yes! The others too, will mind. I shall never forget our moments we shared together.
How can one set aside the fact that you have loved him?
Loved him before.
Loved him until now...
Time has passed by against me, like the flow of Yukino's wise words in the soft breeze. It was spring. It was June. And you could hear the faint tinkling of bells amongst the
strain. Never thought that I would lose a battle. No, I KNEW that I do not have the upper hand in this game. Not that I was defeated, but she already had his heart from the very
beginning. Since he was a child, they were already giving precious glances. Glances that I wished that were directed towards me, drowning in those magnetic gaze.
A rustling of white silk against the pale green grass. Footsteps that carries grace. However, it cannot hide the slight shiver of the earth as she continues.
This is the start of my unending agony.
Two solemn figures with a smile that grazed their lips. As if this was forever playing in their melodies.
Better yet, my challenge that I can never win.
The holy words of the ceremony droned on. Each word dropped to create new life, to make sure that the vows and responsibilities would be bear in mind and be fulfilled with their answers in its earnest.
This, I will always bear in my mind. That sometimes, you can't just win anything.
Soft brown eyes searched another pair towards the distant altar on the center. Everyone were expectant of their hands to be tied together. In the semblance of the circular chord to bind them. The glistening ring in each of their fingers were teasing my eyes.
Threatening to fill me up with tears, reminding me that I was weak, after all. The innocent clink of the ancient cups as they drew sake had
overrode my senses...
No, I'm strong enough to withstand this. I could take on thousands of enemies with one strike of my fist but with this sight...
Finally, the ceremony ended. With their lips meeting to search their true feelings deep inside. They must know it by then, I mused, they belong to each other now.
I finally grew up. I'm proud of it. Tired from the constant chases, worthless confessions and silent longings. I am finally free in the constant binds of this fantasies. I was constantly following him.
I ignored the fact that I am already losing the ends. holding to that childish belief that somehow...somehow...That Ukiya-sempai, who haunted my dreams will realize my feelings. But unfortunately, (as I said earlier) I grew up. Closing to the fact that I must let go. You can't win everything,
This is the best initiative I can think of...I will not going to barge in to destroy this moment.
I ran.
Away from everybody.
Away from my heartbreak.
Away from this darn love.
Away from them.
It might be shining so bright, but let me mourn with my death.
Just this once and I'll forget.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Author's Notes:
Is this too deep?
She grew up!
This was supposed to be the prose form of 'For me'. Yeah, that angsty poem. Check it out!
I hope this is ok...I'm pretty down lately.
Guys...This is all for you!
Poor Kaoru, ne? The wedding had a combination of Shinto and Western wedding to help you to imagine.
