In Which We Give Up Paradise
Notes: So I was listening to "Written In The Stars," and the thought occurred to me that it would be a perfectly angsty song for Clark and Lex...and next thing you know, this was written. I don't know how it happened, really. ;)
----
"I am here to tell you
We can never meet again.
Simple, really, isn't it?
A word or two and then --
A lifetime of not knowing
Where or how or why or when
You think of me or speak of me
Or wonder what befell
to someone you once loved
so long ago somewhere..."
-- Written In The Stars
----
Clark looked up, in utter silence, a young man frozen in a attitude that suggested he was either about to run away or spring at the intruder, as Lex entered the barn, clothing disarranged and dirtier than Clark had ever seen on him.
The words were almost too quietly said; Clark, even with SuperHearing, had to lean forward to hear Lex speak. "I am here to tell you we can never meet again."
Clark shook his head, understanding the words perfectly well, but simply disbelieving. "I can't believe *you* did that," he said, feeling like a cold hand had wrapped around his heart and started to squeeze.
"I'm really a heartless, vicious, bastard, Clark," Lex sneered, turning away from Clark to stare at the golden shadows filtering through the barn. "You should never have trusted me."
Clark smiled. "No. My father was right. I shouldn't have." He took a step toward Lex, breaking the frozen posture he had been holding. "It's not my fault you're seductive and beautiful, as well as heartless."
Lex laughed bitterly. "Much good my charms do you now." He met Clark's eyes, and his mood suddenly changed from bitter to almost tender. "It's like -- Clark, do you ever feel that you're just a cog in the wheel of time, just another piece of someone's destiny?"
Clark nodded. "Yeah, I do." He cast a quick glance in the direction of the buried spaceship, not that Lex would know where it was.
"I'm trapped in my fate," Lex explained. "Everything I do just digs a deeper hole. I want out."
"Take me with you?" Clark asked, smiling quickly at Lex, forgetting the events of the last few days for a moment.
The bitterness dropped back over Lex's face. "I wish I could," he said. "But you don't want to be seen with me now."
"No, I don't." Clark was completely calm as he said this. It was the right thing to say. The urge to fling himself at Lex and beg to never be parted from him, come what may, was just a wild emotion and could be controlled. He controlled it.
Lex just looked at him for a long time, silent. "Sometimes," he said at last, "I wish I'd never learned what it is to love you."
Clark's calm facade was on the verge of breaking. "I would never wish the same of you," he whispered, swallowing hard. "Go, Lex, you and I have nothing more to say to each other."
They had unconsciously moved closer to each other during the last few words, and it was a simple thing for Lex to reach out and lay a hand on Clark's shoulder. "Nothing more to say, perhaps..."
And then they were kissing, for the last time, and it was fifty times better than it had been the first time they kissed. All the anger and the passion and the love between them flowed into that kiss, as they stood with their arms around each other in the dim light of the barn, their hearts breaking in tandem.
It was Lex who drew back, Clark, all but lost to the emotion, would have yielded then and gone with Lex if he had asked him to. But Lex did not ask.
Letting a hand trail regretfully down Clark's face, he released him. "There is nothing to decide, nothing to say, Clark, you're right."
Clark bowed his head, resembling nothing so much as a young heartbroken god as he stood in a last shaft of sunlight, watching Lex leave.
"Goodbye," Lex whispered, and was gone.
END
Notes: So I was listening to "Written In The Stars," and the thought occurred to me that it would be a perfectly angsty song for Clark and Lex...and next thing you know, this was written. I don't know how it happened, really. ;)
----
"I am here to tell you
We can never meet again.
Simple, really, isn't it?
A word or two and then --
A lifetime of not knowing
Where or how or why or when
You think of me or speak of me
Or wonder what befell
to someone you once loved
so long ago somewhere..."
-- Written In The Stars
----
Clark looked up, in utter silence, a young man frozen in a attitude that suggested he was either about to run away or spring at the intruder, as Lex entered the barn, clothing disarranged and dirtier than Clark had ever seen on him.
The words were almost too quietly said; Clark, even with SuperHearing, had to lean forward to hear Lex speak. "I am here to tell you we can never meet again."
Clark shook his head, understanding the words perfectly well, but simply disbelieving. "I can't believe *you* did that," he said, feeling like a cold hand had wrapped around his heart and started to squeeze.
"I'm really a heartless, vicious, bastard, Clark," Lex sneered, turning away from Clark to stare at the golden shadows filtering through the barn. "You should never have trusted me."
Clark smiled. "No. My father was right. I shouldn't have." He took a step toward Lex, breaking the frozen posture he had been holding. "It's not my fault you're seductive and beautiful, as well as heartless."
Lex laughed bitterly. "Much good my charms do you now." He met Clark's eyes, and his mood suddenly changed from bitter to almost tender. "It's like -- Clark, do you ever feel that you're just a cog in the wheel of time, just another piece of someone's destiny?"
Clark nodded. "Yeah, I do." He cast a quick glance in the direction of the buried spaceship, not that Lex would know where it was.
"I'm trapped in my fate," Lex explained. "Everything I do just digs a deeper hole. I want out."
"Take me with you?" Clark asked, smiling quickly at Lex, forgetting the events of the last few days for a moment.
The bitterness dropped back over Lex's face. "I wish I could," he said. "But you don't want to be seen with me now."
"No, I don't." Clark was completely calm as he said this. It was the right thing to say. The urge to fling himself at Lex and beg to never be parted from him, come what may, was just a wild emotion and could be controlled. He controlled it.
Lex just looked at him for a long time, silent. "Sometimes," he said at last, "I wish I'd never learned what it is to love you."
Clark's calm facade was on the verge of breaking. "I would never wish the same of you," he whispered, swallowing hard. "Go, Lex, you and I have nothing more to say to each other."
They had unconsciously moved closer to each other during the last few words, and it was a simple thing for Lex to reach out and lay a hand on Clark's shoulder. "Nothing more to say, perhaps..."
And then they were kissing, for the last time, and it was fifty times better than it had been the first time they kissed. All the anger and the passion and the love between them flowed into that kiss, as they stood with their arms around each other in the dim light of the barn, their hearts breaking in tandem.
It was Lex who drew back, Clark, all but lost to the emotion, would have yielded then and gone with Lex if he had asked him to. But Lex did not ask.
Letting a hand trail regretfully down Clark's face, he released him. "There is nothing to decide, nothing to say, Clark, you're right."
Clark bowed his head, resembling nothing so much as a young heartbroken god as he stood in a last shaft of sunlight, watching Lex leave.
"Goodbye," Lex whispered, and was gone.
END