Chapter 3- Has the world gone crazy-go-nuts?!
At this point Harry had been sitting in silent under-knickerless agony for nigh on twenty minutes and Snape was beginning to doubt just a little the effectiveness of his plan. However being the crafty potions guy that he was another idea quickly came upon him. It was a crafty plan, a wily plan, and above all an EVIL plan. Mostly it involved poking his prey until his girly screams reverberated through the castle, drawing his quarry to him!
He inched closer, creeping his wand out of his pockets and inching towards the prone Boy Wonder. Harry's breathing got heavier as he heard the sullen footsteps draw near, and he clenched his arms to his sides, hating the feeling of helplessness! He saw the shadow of the wand loom over his chest, and drew in his breath to scream.
Elsewhere, Ron had just realized that both Draco *and* harry were gone and that he had been talking to a rat for well over an hour. But, he thought, it was such stimulating conversation! Scabbers was very well versed in many things and both of them had gotten so caught up in their debate over the pros and cons of battery powered can openers that they hadn't even noticed that they were alone.
"Jack the rippe' rat in 'e meadows!" he pronounced. "Scabbers, we've got to see what's afoot before anything dreadful happens!" grasping the rat to his chest (he had missed having a fuzzy creature to love ever since finding out that *his* scabbers had been an evil minion) He skidded into his beloved school. and coincidentally right into the Great Hall.
There he stumbled upon a sight that quite probably had the capability to blind him for the rest of his natural life. Screaming, his hands flew up to his eyes as he raced back outside the Great hall. Narrowly avoiding a collision with hermoine and draco. Wait, Hermoine and draco?
"Has the world gone TOTALLY MAD?!" he screamed. Draco decided to take advantage of the seemingly fragile state of the boy's mind and stepped close to the fiery moppet. "Yes, Weasley. mad with PASSION!" and laid a fat one right on the boy's cute-yet-froglike lips. Ron's eyes goggled to the top and he ran for his life up down the corridor. In his escape he dropped poor Scabbers, and Draco scooped him up.
Now, Hermoine was not one to against a good snog; however, snogging with Ron was absolutely forbidden. Absolutely. And just to make this point extra clear to one Draco "I snogged Ron" Malfoy she made sure to put some extra force into her slap. Having been forced to witness far too much for one poor small rat to handle, way too early in the morning Scabbers finally snapped.
The fluffy clairvoyant's eyes grew to the size of pencil-ends (very large for a rodent) and he opened his mouth and grandly boomed "SQUEE SNAP SNAP EEEEEEEE!!!!!" Draco dropped his mouth in horror as Ron and Hermione looked at one another in confusion. "My God, we've got to run!" Malfoy insisted. His unwilling companions seemed unsure. "You ruddy git, Weasley, I thought you understood rattongue! Don't tell me you were just talking to yourself all this time!"
It appeared that in fact Ron had totally forgotten about rattongue and had actually been *just* talking to Scabbers. They didn't take time to think about this however as they made a mad dash for the Great Hall. There was no specific reason they ran towards the Great Hall, other than it happened to be right there. Had they been thinking clearly they would have realized that it had been the sight of something in the Great Hall that had caused Scabbers to panic so. But alas, they ran straight into the awaiting arms of a horror unlike any other.
"AAAHAHAHA!! Oh Snapie-poo, you're just so tricky with that WAND!" they heard, to their great horror as they stumbled through the enormous doors. This was, however, a hallucination. It was caused by a far, far worse sight than they had ever seen in their entire little lives, and it was a cruel twist of fate that there was no escape from it. For the doors to the Great Hall had shut with a resounding clap, and nothing, nothing could break through them. Not even three desperate students trying to flee from the sight of Harry Potter and Severous Snape. Together. Involved in some activity that required ropes and a fetishy outfit. An outfit that Draco's horrified mind realized was really quite becoming on Harry.
"I don't want to know I don't want to know I don't want to kno-hoooo" sobbed young Ron Weasley, covering his eyes. Harry, who was mostly unable to move because of a most sinister Snape-directed spell, tsked. "Well, Ron, that's a bit extreme; I have worn this outfit before. Why do you think I was carrying it around in my knapsack?" Ron continued to howl. "I hate those pajamas!" he bawled out. Draco raised an eyebrow and step closer.
To him it seemed as if learning that the outfit on Harry, Potter his mind corrected, was actually a pajama set opened a wide new range of possibilities. But wide new world of possibilities or not the question still remained about what Harry was doing in said pajamas and why, oh gods why, that had anything to do with Snape! During this inner monologue and the shocked silence that accompanied it, Snape was beginning to feel quite pleased with himself, after all his plan HAD worked.
"Now my young Slythern protégé, about what you have witnessed between me and professor Flitwick." he hissed. Malfoy made a face that indicated he didn't want to talk about it; Ron and Hermione gagged. "Pantalones explodum!" he roared in their direction with a tap of his wand behind his back. The two instantly exploded towards the heavens and were heaved out of Hogwarts via a skylight (unharmed; after all it was their knickers that did the blowing up.)
This of course put draco in the inevitable position of being alone with both Harry and Snape. Though at this point in time Snape seemed to be a much more dangerous foe than Harry had ever been. Forgotten and shivering from fright Scabbers lay hidden beneath Hermoine's bookbag, which luckily had not been exploded with her knickers.
"Mr. Malfoy, my boy." the potions professor continued, "About what you saw." Perhaps the world will never know what everybody's favorite house potions master was about to say, because it was at this exact moment that Harry miraculously regained his ability to move, and he took advantage of this fact by grabbing the nearest object he could find and lobbing it at Snape's head. Perhaps not as tidy as magic, he reasoned, but it quite does the trick.
Unfortunately, the closest thing on hand to Harry was the terrified Scabbers. Somehow the poor beast had managed to scuttle over to him; the boy had seemed rather harmless in his paralyzed state. And while Scabbers was not quite large enough to do any real damage, having a rat lobbed at your head will make even the strongest of souls waver. This was, of course, the point; and with a yell Harry ran towards the door and his freedom. However; running across slippery stone in socks is never a good idea, and halfway across the hall Harry began to slide speedily across the floor.
"Whoooooaaa." he uttered, before crashing into his nemesis and slapper. They slammed into the door, bonked heads, and became utterly unconscious.
After a couple of minutes of frantic picture taking, Snape looked around and remembered that the entire purpose of this trap had been to *talk* to Draco, Not watch the Potter boy plow into him and them sprawling in an unconscious heap (hilarious as that was). Hopefully, he thought, the crash would have knocked all recollection of seeing him and Professor Flitwick from Draco's mind. However to be on the safe side he settled himself down to wait for the boys to regain consciousness, after all its not like he could unlock the Great Hall doors anyway.
Now, this was about the time that Headmaster Dumbledore, or Snarfy as he liked call himself, tended to come downstairs for his noontime cocktail. (Oh, he'd tell you it was virgin if you caught him, but one thing the wizard's drinks were not was anything but hard liquor.) On his way to the kitchen he tended to pass by the Great Hall in order to glance at the portraits and make sure they were behaving themselves, and he was most disgruntled to find the doors closed and bolted.
"Who could have done this?" he wondered out loud. It seemed impossible to him that anyone would want to close the doors to the Great Hall. Perhaps something mysterious was happening behind them. perhaps, he thought excitedly, something involving lemon drops. Thinking happy thoughts about candy in general, he was quite surprised when upon throwing the doors open instead of finding a great lemon drop feast, Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy slid out. Apparently they had been leaning against the doors, and upon closer inspection it appeared to Dumbledore that Harry was wearing a sailor suit. "Well that settles that" he muttered, "its defiantly too early to be awake if I'm starting to see things" and with that he scooted the two boys back into the hall, closed the door, and retreated to the sanctuary of his office to sleep the day away.
It was shortly after Ol' Snarfy (as nobody but Nurse Pomfrey would ever call him, and even then not without much giggling and retribution) had bumbled away that Draco and Harry were rudely awakened from their little lie-down by a most obnoxious pounding on the Hall doors. Still half-addled, they scooted into a corner and dropped off again, their heads on each others' shoulders. (in the wizarding world this is very possible.)
This did nothing to stop the pounding, sadly. Scabbers, still tender from his impact with the potions master, began to get a frightening headache. Psychic or not, thought Scabbers, he was no match for two humongous doors. It was time to search for reinforcements.
~Ok, this is going to be where we leave it for a while. we have written more, but right now we sort of need some help with HTML and things; we want this to look a little bit nicer! I mean, b and br do not seem to work; I am frankly at a loss.
Aren't you in dreadful anticipation wondering what Scabbers could have up his sleeve? . fur. ?Choka and Jessiboo, signing off. ^___________~
At this point Harry had been sitting in silent under-knickerless agony for nigh on twenty minutes and Snape was beginning to doubt just a little the effectiveness of his plan. However being the crafty potions guy that he was another idea quickly came upon him. It was a crafty plan, a wily plan, and above all an EVIL plan. Mostly it involved poking his prey until his girly screams reverberated through the castle, drawing his quarry to him!
He inched closer, creeping his wand out of his pockets and inching towards the prone Boy Wonder. Harry's breathing got heavier as he heard the sullen footsteps draw near, and he clenched his arms to his sides, hating the feeling of helplessness! He saw the shadow of the wand loom over his chest, and drew in his breath to scream.
Elsewhere, Ron had just realized that both Draco *and* harry were gone and that he had been talking to a rat for well over an hour. But, he thought, it was such stimulating conversation! Scabbers was very well versed in many things and both of them had gotten so caught up in their debate over the pros and cons of battery powered can openers that they hadn't even noticed that they were alone.
"Jack the rippe' rat in 'e meadows!" he pronounced. "Scabbers, we've got to see what's afoot before anything dreadful happens!" grasping the rat to his chest (he had missed having a fuzzy creature to love ever since finding out that *his* scabbers had been an evil minion) He skidded into his beloved school. and coincidentally right into the Great Hall.
There he stumbled upon a sight that quite probably had the capability to blind him for the rest of his natural life. Screaming, his hands flew up to his eyes as he raced back outside the Great hall. Narrowly avoiding a collision with hermoine and draco. Wait, Hermoine and draco?
"Has the world gone TOTALLY MAD?!" he screamed. Draco decided to take advantage of the seemingly fragile state of the boy's mind and stepped close to the fiery moppet. "Yes, Weasley. mad with PASSION!" and laid a fat one right on the boy's cute-yet-froglike lips. Ron's eyes goggled to the top and he ran for his life up down the corridor. In his escape he dropped poor Scabbers, and Draco scooped him up.
Now, Hermoine was not one to against a good snog; however, snogging with Ron was absolutely forbidden. Absolutely. And just to make this point extra clear to one Draco "I snogged Ron" Malfoy she made sure to put some extra force into her slap. Having been forced to witness far too much for one poor small rat to handle, way too early in the morning Scabbers finally snapped.
The fluffy clairvoyant's eyes grew to the size of pencil-ends (very large for a rodent) and he opened his mouth and grandly boomed "SQUEE SNAP SNAP EEEEEEEE!!!!!" Draco dropped his mouth in horror as Ron and Hermione looked at one another in confusion. "My God, we've got to run!" Malfoy insisted. His unwilling companions seemed unsure. "You ruddy git, Weasley, I thought you understood rattongue! Don't tell me you were just talking to yourself all this time!"
It appeared that in fact Ron had totally forgotten about rattongue and had actually been *just* talking to Scabbers. They didn't take time to think about this however as they made a mad dash for the Great Hall. There was no specific reason they ran towards the Great Hall, other than it happened to be right there. Had they been thinking clearly they would have realized that it had been the sight of something in the Great Hall that had caused Scabbers to panic so. But alas, they ran straight into the awaiting arms of a horror unlike any other.
"AAAHAHAHA!! Oh Snapie-poo, you're just so tricky with that WAND!" they heard, to their great horror as they stumbled through the enormous doors. This was, however, a hallucination. It was caused by a far, far worse sight than they had ever seen in their entire little lives, and it was a cruel twist of fate that there was no escape from it. For the doors to the Great Hall had shut with a resounding clap, and nothing, nothing could break through them. Not even three desperate students trying to flee from the sight of Harry Potter and Severous Snape. Together. Involved in some activity that required ropes and a fetishy outfit. An outfit that Draco's horrified mind realized was really quite becoming on Harry.
"I don't want to know I don't want to know I don't want to kno-hoooo" sobbed young Ron Weasley, covering his eyes. Harry, who was mostly unable to move because of a most sinister Snape-directed spell, tsked. "Well, Ron, that's a bit extreme; I have worn this outfit before. Why do you think I was carrying it around in my knapsack?" Ron continued to howl. "I hate those pajamas!" he bawled out. Draco raised an eyebrow and step closer.
To him it seemed as if learning that the outfit on Harry, Potter his mind corrected, was actually a pajama set opened a wide new range of possibilities. But wide new world of possibilities or not the question still remained about what Harry was doing in said pajamas and why, oh gods why, that had anything to do with Snape! During this inner monologue and the shocked silence that accompanied it, Snape was beginning to feel quite pleased with himself, after all his plan HAD worked.
"Now my young Slythern protégé, about what you have witnessed between me and professor Flitwick." he hissed. Malfoy made a face that indicated he didn't want to talk about it; Ron and Hermione gagged. "Pantalones explodum!" he roared in their direction with a tap of his wand behind his back. The two instantly exploded towards the heavens and were heaved out of Hogwarts via a skylight (unharmed; after all it was their knickers that did the blowing up.)
This of course put draco in the inevitable position of being alone with both Harry and Snape. Though at this point in time Snape seemed to be a much more dangerous foe than Harry had ever been. Forgotten and shivering from fright Scabbers lay hidden beneath Hermoine's bookbag, which luckily had not been exploded with her knickers.
"Mr. Malfoy, my boy." the potions professor continued, "About what you saw." Perhaps the world will never know what everybody's favorite house potions master was about to say, because it was at this exact moment that Harry miraculously regained his ability to move, and he took advantage of this fact by grabbing the nearest object he could find and lobbing it at Snape's head. Perhaps not as tidy as magic, he reasoned, but it quite does the trick.
Unfortunately, the closest thing on hand to Harry was the terrified Scabbers. Somehow the poor beast had managed to scuttle over to him; the boy had seemed rather harmless in his paralyzed state. And while Scabbers was not quite large enough to do any real damage, having a rat lobbed at your head will make even the strongest of souls waver. This was, of course, the point; and with a yell Harry ran towards the door and his freedom. However; running across slippery stone in socks is never a good idea, and halfway across the hall Harry began to slide speedily across the floor.
"Whoooooaaa." he uttered, before crashing into his nemesis and slapper. They slammed into the door, bonked heads, and became utterly unconscious.
After a couple of minutes of frantic picture taking, Snape looked around and remembered that the entire purpose of this trap had been to *talk* to Draco, Not watch the Potter boy plow into him and them sprawling in an unconscious heap (hilarious as that was). Hopefully, he thought, the crash would have knocked all recollection of seeing him and Professor Flitwick from Draco's mind. However to be on the safe side he settled himself down to wait for the boys to regain consciousness, after all its not like he could unlock the Great Hall doors anyway.
Now, this was about the time that Headmaster Dumbledore, or Snarfy as he liked call himself, tended to come downstairs for his noontime cocktail. (Oh, he'd tell you it was virgin if you caught him, but one thing the wizard's drinks were not was anything but hard liquor.) On his way to the kitchen he tended to pass by the Great Hall in order to glance at the portraits and make sure they were behaving themselves, and he was most disgruntled to find the doors closed and bolted.
"Who could have done this?" he wondered out loud. It seemed impossible to him that anyone would want to close the doors to the Great Hall. Perhaps something mysterious was happening behind them. perhaps, he thought excitedly, something involving lemon drops. Thinking happy thoughts about candy in general, he was quite surprised when upon throwing the doors open instead of finding a great lemon drop feast, Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy slid out. Apparently they had been leaning against the doors, and upon closer inspection it appeared to Dumbledore that Harry was wearing a sailor suit. "Well that settles that" he muttered, "its defiantly too early to be awake if I'm starting to see things" and with that he scooted the two boys back into the hall, closed the door, and retreated to the sanctuary of his office to sleep the day away.
It was shortly after Ol' Snarfy (as nobody but Nurse Pomfrey would ever call him, and even then not without much giggling and retribution) had bumbled away that Draco and Harry were rudely awakened from their little lie-down by a most obnoxious pounding on the Hall doors. Still half-addled, they scooted into a corner and dropped off again, their heads on each others' shoulders. (in the wizarding world this is very possible.)
This did nothing to stop the pounding, sadly. Scabbers, still tender from his impact with the potions master, began to get a frightening headache. Psychic or not, thought Scabbers, he was no match for two humongous doors. It was time to search for reinforcements.
~Ok, this is going to be where we leave it for a while. we have written more, but right now we sort of need some help with HTML and things; we want this to look a little bit nicer! I mean, b and br do not seem to work; I am frankly at a loss.
Aren't you in dreadful anticipation wondering what Scabbers could have up his sleeve? . fur. ?Choka and Jessiboo, signing off. ^___________~