Disclaimer: Not much to say in a disclaimer, just that I don't own CCS and its characters since good ol' CLAMP does.
" Speech
( ) Translation
Thinking in italics
Chapter Two: I trust yet I fear
2nd CCS fic by Fizzalicious Cherri
"You know, you should stop drinking."
The bartender got no reply. "I didn't even ask for your ID young man. I suggest you stop drinking because you look like you're about to vomit."
The boy slammed the glass down on the counter and looked up at the bartender through strands of brown hair falling into his eyes. "Do you know I waited one whole day?"
The bartender stared at him weird but didn't say a word. "I waited, she didn't come." The boy muttered and started laughing sadly. "Do you know what it feels like?"
"No sir. And here's your bill..."
The boy growled and slapped the bill aside. "I'm not done yet!! And I'm not sir , I'm Li Syaoran! Hear of that name?!"
The bartender looked frightened, "Yes, yes of course..."
"Give me another beer," Syaoran muttered.
"That wouldn't be smart Mr.Li."
Syaoran reached into his pocket and pulled out his wallet to throw a twenty dollar bill at the bartender. "Whatever." He grumbled and got off his seat and walked towards the door slowly. "If you ever see her, tell her that I'm waiting."
"Um, sure."
He pushed the door open and entered the cool night streets of Tomoeda's shopping district. It was late, very late at night, and not many people were walking the streets.
"Why didn't you come damnit!!" He yelled at the dark sky, sadness and anger covered his features. "WHY!?"
"Stop yelling out there!!" A women yelled from an apartment window.
Syaoran dropped his head, his gaze on the dirty sidewalk. "Why..." He muttered under his breath. "Do you not love me anymore? Did I waste five years and you just went along with your life?!" He kicked the street lamp next to him even though it sent a searing pain up his foot.
He felt numb. "Or maybe...maybe you were busy today. Yeah...maybe you'll come tomorrow..." Syaoran said softly as he walked back towards the cherry blossom tree... their cherry blossom tree. It took him longer than he expected as he leaned against the trunk in despair.
His vision was getting blurry, as the stars in the sky became blurry splotches of glowing light. He let out a groan as he dropped to the ground.
"Sakura, I need to talk to you." He said grimly one autumn afternoon over the phone.
There was a slight pause before the girl on the other end of the line replied. "Ok Shaoran. I'll meet you at Penguin park."
He placed the phone down warily and left his apartment to meet his girlfriend. He knew today was going to be the last time he got to see her for a while....
And then he saw her, standing peacefully under that cherry blossom tree a bit away from the big penguin slide. Her back was to him, the wind gently blowing her short auburn hair around.
"Sakura."
She turned and smiled at him. "Shaoran!!" She cried in delight as she ran over to him, but then she seemed to realize something. The look on his face, pure sorrow.
"...Shaoran...?" She blinked in confusion, her innocent emerald eyes worried. "Is something wrong?"
"I'm going back." Was all he could mumble.
Sakura tilted her head. "Going back where silly?"
"Home. China. Hong Kong. The clan wants me there so I can train to become the future leader." He explained the whole complicated situation to her. In one chopped up sentence.
"...China? You're leaving Tomoeda...?" She asked shakily.
He nodded, he hated seeing her this way. God why did he have to hurt her? "I'll be back though. In five years."
Sakura stared at him and fell into his embrace. "Five years!!" She cried into his chest. "How will we find each other after five years?!"
"...We'll meet back here?" Syaoran suggested in a whisper so only Sakura could hear, not the birds around them, nor the butterflies floating around them. But only her.
Sakura looked him in the eye, and nodded sadly. "We'll meet here. April 1, promise?" She stood back and stuck out her pinky.
Syaoran hooked his pinky around her delicate small one and they stared at each other for a moment before Syaoran turned on his heels and ran.
"SYAORAN!!" He could hear the cry of despair ringing throughout the park, Tomoeda, and all the way in his heart and back to China.
"Hey witch! Watch where you're going!"
Sae apologized numbly as she quickly walked on down the hallway of Tsuki High School. The main high school of the city Tsuki.
She always wore a cap in the hallways, but not in class since the teacher said it was rude. At least she thought the cap shaded a bit of her face.
Although she felt awfully lonely all the time, she sometimes enjoyed the silence of being alone. Sae had no particular interest in any subjects except for some strange reason she found writing poetry an enjoyable thing to do to past her time.
She opened up her bag as she took a seat on a bench and pulled out a notebook and a pen. Her hand held the pen tightly, her eyes staring at the fresh new page blankly until all of a sudden she placed her pen down and started writing.
Sorry I haven't been there
Sorry I wasn't the one
Sorry I was always on the run
Sae paused, lifting her pen up a bit and staring at the words she had woven together out of no where. She smiled slightly, she liked how her poems came out of no where but made so much sense. At least to her.
I don't know how I do it. Sae thought, a bit proud. But all my poems...I feel like I'm part of them...like I've been through what I've written.
Then, she didn't know what to write next. Maybe I'll just leave it at that...for now.
She flipped onto another page that she had written on before and glanced at the top of the page to see what she had named the poem. I am me.
I am swirls of blue, green, red, yellow, purple, orange, and the colors no one can name
I am the sky, the sea, the earth.
I trust yet I fear.
I hide yet I dont hold anything back.
I am free
I am me, and me is just right.
She sighed deeply. This poem...is what I want to be. Sae reached into her bag and pulled out a small tube of white-out and squeezed it so the white liquid covered the title.
She blew on it for a few seconds and then placed her pen tip where the old title use to lay, but was now underneath the surface of white guk. What I want to be. She wrote neatly in replacement and closed her notebook shut with a pleased smile as she tucked her book back into her bag.
The bell rang, signaling the last half of the day. Sae quickly hurried across the soccer field, but unfortunately for her she was struck by a soccer ball right in the stomach.
She winced but made no sound as she looked under her cap to see who had kicked the ball.
"Sorry witch." A guy chuckled and came over to kick the ball away.
Sae frowned as she continued on her way. She was use to it now, she had always been called 'witch' since the second day of the first week of school at Tsuki High.
Someday I'll show them...that I'm human too.
Syaoran awoke sitting under the shade of the great branches of the cherry blossom tree. He stretched his arms and scrunched up his nose at the awful smell of beer around him.
Actually, after a few sniffs he noticed it came from him. "God..." He got up slowly, smacking his forehead as he did so to try and tame the fiery headache burning in his head.
And then he realized again...she didn't come. Syaoran wandered the streets of Tomoeda, noticing that all didn't change that much, except that the penguin slide near their tree looked much older and more used.
A couple new stores lined the streets, but Syaoran remembered everything.
If you're not coming, I'm coming to you. Syaoran thought as he walked up the familiar street that led to her house. An image of the yellow cozy home flashed threw his mind for a few seconds before he realized he had walked by it.
But...he hadn't?
But...he was already past the street it was suppose to be on.
Syaoran looked around and then forward. Gone. That was the word. Everything was gone.
She was gone.
Her home was gone.
Hope was gone.
"...Sakura....?" He walked back towards where her house was suppose to be. Instead, a newer and bigger house stood in its place. A white painted house, a small porch at the front with lively colored pots of flowers lined up on the window sill.
A tall apple tree grew in the front lawn, producing shiny ripe apples that a couple birds were pecking at. Peaceful.
Curiousity took over him as he walked up the steps to the front door and peeked through one of the many clean windows. He could see what he assumed as the family room because of the T.V, couches, and a coffee table covered with a bunch of magazines. The T.V. had been left on, displaying a Japanese anime show with cute little characters running around the screen.
He raised his hand and pressed the doorbell.
He waited...and waited...
"Uh...who are you?"
Syaoran stared at the person standing in the doorway, leaning slightly on one foot with a towel wrapped around their hair. "Excuse me, but who are you? Are you some adveristment guy cause I'm not interested."
"Sakura?" Syaoran uttered, staring into the girl's glassy green eyes.
The girl raised an eyebrow. "You're selling cherry blossoms? Sorry I'm still not interested."
Syaoran shook his head. "No..." He stepped closer towards the door, making the girl shrink back a bit.
"Hey! Are you a robber!?" She suddenly exclaimed. "If you are I'm going to scream!!"
Syaoran shook his head even more furiously but he so badly wanted to go into the house. Was this Sakura? Why couldn't she remember him. He stepped even closer, one foot onto the wooden floor.
"Get away!!" The girl pushed him back, making the towel fall off her head revealing a viel of shiny auburn hair.
"Sakura!" Syaoran exclaimed.
AN: Heh...are you guys confused? Don't be confused :P Hehehehe well, maybe you are all confused but I don't blame you. Also the poems on this page aren't mine ok? They are just famous poems written by misc people. Well, I hope you liked this chapter :)