Never Tell a Goblin King Where An Author Lives

By: Neko-chan



A/N: IT LIVES!!!!!!!!! *screams* LOL. Gomen nasai, I just couldn't help myself. (Yes, I already realize that I'm odd. But in my own little world, I'M NORMAL! NORMAL, I TELL YA! D) And so, once again, the abomination continues... What do Neko-chan and (the wonderful, great, majestic, awe-inspiring, and talented) Sallie Drazzi have in stores for our stud-muffin Goblin King? ...read and find out. ^_^

Disclaimer: Once again, Neko-chan does not own the Labyrinth. Terribly imaginative people do. Sadly, Neko-chan is not counted among those afore mentioned people. Sad. So very, very sad...



The two red-heads glared down at the very last privy that they were to clean. Once they finally cleaned that one...they were _done._ There was no other latrines and privies in the castle. (They had combed the castle up and down to make SURE that this was the VERY LAST privy.) But see, the thing was...

Neither of them wanted to clean it.

It was...old. And...nasty. And gross, disgusting, creepy, amazingly dirty, and any other awful adjective you could think of. In fact, the privy looked as if it hadn't been cleaned in years. (Which, in fact, it hadn't been.) Another bad thing--this particular privy was located in the goblins' quarters, which made cleaning it all the more nastier.

Neko-chan looked down at the privy, looked at her scrub brush, then turned to her favorite Labyrinth author. Gathering her courage, she said: "I'm not cleaning that."

Sallie Drazzi looked down at her own scrub brush and then the privy, also. "I'm not touching that, either," she stated flatly.

The younger girl frowned. "Well...then who's gonna clean it, huh? If that baka King finds out that we didn't clean his stupid privy, then he's gonna find something ELSE for us to do. What happens if he sends us to go weed the Bog of Eternal Stench?"

The older red-head shuddered. "Normally, I would say 'Don't think that! Of course he wouldn't make us go and do _that_! He's nicer than ' But..."

"This is the Goblin King we're talking about," Neko-chan finished for her. "Anyway...I'm not cleaning that. Even though you're my favorite Laby author...I STILL refuse to touch...that. What _is_ that, by the way?"

Sallie Drazzi shuddered. "I really don't want to know. Anyway, no offense is taken. I don't want to clean it, also. Can't blame a person for not wanting to clean..._that._"

Neko-chan grinned and Sallie Drazzi could see why some people called her a (sometimes) demonic cat girl. It wasn't a very nice smile at ALL. In fact, if you didn't mind being blunt, Sallie Drazzi thought that it looked positively...evil...

"Sallie..."

"Yes, Neko-chan?"

"I just thought of something absolutely...fun. Let's not finish this particular privy. No one will notice that it's not done. And if they DO notice that it's not done, we'll just tell them that we scrubbed really, really hard, but..._that_...wouldn't come off. 'Kay?"

The older red-head nodded. "Alright. Sounds like a plan to me. But, Neko-chan...what do you have in mind?"

Neko-chan's grin darkened and broadened...all at the same time. (Is that even _possible_?) She tried to put on an innocent facade, but Sallie Drazzi knew better. (She was a red-head, too, after all. Too bad she wasn't a Scorpio, like Neko-chan. Then they would have made Jareth's life a living nightmare...)

She smiled again. "Oh, well...I just had an absolutely _marvelous_ plan, Sallie!"

An answering smile. "And what would that be, Neko-chan?"

"Well, just think about it. We're in the Labyrinth. Obviously there is magic here. And Jareth couldn't just be _born_ with his magic, ne? He had to learn it from _somewhere_. Besides tutors and scholars and all...where do we learn stuff? From _books._ And that means _libraries._ And that means easy access for nearly anyone. And that means, my dear fellow red-headed authoress...we can learn magic, too."

"Oh?" A raised eyebrow. Sallie was interested, Neko-chan could tell. But, then again, Sallie Drazzi wouldn't really want to admit to it. But Neko-chan wasn't through yet...

"And we want to get back at Jareth for the whole _tattoo_ and _privy_ things, riiiiiiight?"

"Right..."

"So, Sallie, how do you feel about itching powder?"



A/N: Yup! Chapter three! Short, yes, I know. Buuuuut...it introduces a whole 'nother story arc for the upcoming chapters! (Which I'll try and update more often, I promise!) You can probably see where this is going... ^_^;; And, just think about it: Sallie Drazzi and Neko-chan...with magical powers. Scary thought, ne?



Translations:

gomen nasai: "I'm sorry!"

baka: stupid, idiot

ne: just...added little thing for Japanese vocab. Kinda hard to explain...*sweatdrops*

ja ne: "See ya later!"



[And, just to warn you ahead of time, I DO use Japanese vocabulary...so you'll be seeing these translations a LOT. Ja ne! ^_~]