What Da F*ck
Chapter: 5
By: Kristen and Kristina
Disclaimer: We just use em', ride em', hurt em', and send them back!!!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Chloe stared wide-eyed at none other that John Black.
"Hey Chloe wasssuup!.how's my favorite prostitute these days?"
Chloe smiled and replied seductively "Oh wouldn't you like to know"
John raised an interested eyebrow
Of course Brady saw this from is place by the stairs and quickly broke them
out of there private conversation. "Umm Chloe dear..I believe we have a job
to do...Victor is starting to smell"
"Yeah yeah.just when I'm trying to get some business done you have to go and
remind me about the wrinkly ol' pear on the floor" Chloe says as she walks
over to Brady and Victor.
John follows Chloe over to Brady and notices Victor lying on the bottom of
the stairs dead.
"Holy sh*t when did bob dole get here!?" Chloe and Brady rolled there eyes
and crouched down to get Victor. "It's Victor..and yes he is dead and no I
didn't kill him..Sami did" Chloe replied while grabbing a hold of Victors
feet. "Sami?!..How did she manage to do that?" asked John
"Oh her and Victor were doing it on the bathroom floor upstairs and he had a
heart attack" Brady replied grabbing a hold of Victors arms. John almost
fell on the floor he started laughing so hard. "Omg are u kidding me.?!"
"No they aren't" Marlena replied coming down the stairs. John looked up to
see Marlena and raised another questioning eyebrow at her. Marlena noticed
John's questioning eyes and replied "Don't look at me like that John Black I
know what I'm doing..I have this all under control"
John still kept his questioning stare "Uh huh riight..well then where is
the sex-killing pariah now?"
"You'll eat your words John Black before I turn u into one-nut man like my
good pal Brady here" Sami replied coming down the stairs touching Brady on
the shoulder and smiling sweetly at John.
"Ah so nice of you Sami to join us..did u have a nice nap?" Marlena asked
smiling smugly. "As a matter of fact I did..and don't worry I'm not done
with you yet" Sami replied. "Wait a minute! Did I miss something here?
One-nut man?" John asked. Immediately Brady's face turn a couple shades of
red.
"You know what! If I hear that one more time..i'm gonna!" "You're gonna
what?" Sami said poising her knee up slightly. Brady gulped then replied
"Nevermind" Chloe smirked but then reminded everyone that they still had a
dead body to take care. "All right enough bashing my man here! We still have
Victor to tend to"
(Ding Dong)
Everyone's faces went pale and they turned to the door.
"Gregrelli's Pizza!" came a voice on the other end of the door.
Everyone went wide-eyed and turned back to Sami. Sami looked at all the
faces around her some confused, shocked and others angry. "what?!" she asked
innocently "I thought everyone might get hungry later"
"Listen you tunnel with no exit, we have a dead body on the floor BECAUSE of your horny ass
and then you order a PIZZA," Chloe tells Sami but then she calms done. "What kind of pizza did
you get?"
"Plain. Nothing on it."
"BITCH! Plain?! Who the hell orders just plain? And no pepperoni? Stupid! I hope you know
that I ain't paying for it," Chloe says walking off.
As Sami goes to get the pizza, Brady grabs a blanket from the sofa and lays it on Victor and
suddenly jumps on the blanket making it looks like he is relaxing on the blanket on the floor.
"Hey. That will be $12.50," says teenage looking pizza-dude.
"OK, but hold on. I have a coupon for $2.00 discount.," Sami replies while looking in her purse.
Chloe enters the room while hearing what Sami said. Chloe flops on the couch while looking at
Sami and drinking a CORONA!! "Oh, how did you get that Sami. Was it a prize for how many
men you go down on a week? Did you pass the record and get $2.00 off on a pizza?" She
scratches her chin. "Well, where does that put you now. I thought you were a $2.00 ho, but
nowww....the coupon makes you what? A free ho?"
Sami gives the boy a coupon and $10.50. "Here you go."
Being a teenage boy with a stupid job says, "What? No tip?"
Sami does her flirting thing again! "Oh? You want a tip? Here." With that she grabs his face and
gives me longggg kiss.
Chloe smiles and laughs at the boy's dazed face. "Hey kid. It may seem like a good tip, but she
just gave you a whole lot of medical bills with the STD'S she just gave your ass."
Sami waves bye bye and slams the door in his face. "I have been clean of those for 3 months
already."
"Oh really? And when was the last time you checked?"
Mumbled by Sami. "Three months ago."
John, Marlena, and Chloe laugh and says in unison. "Dumbass!!"
End of Chapter 5.
Author's Note: I hope you understand the "tunnel with no exit." The jokes I use for Sami will
refer to sex, mostly. So if you didn't get the joke, that clue should have helped. Don't worry, I
have some more of them.
Chapter: 5
By: Kristen and Kristina
Disclaimer: We just use em', ride em', hurt em', and send them back!!!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Chloe stared wide-eyed at none other that John Black.
"Hey Chloe wasssuup!.how's my favorite prostitute these days?"
Chloe smiled and replied seductively "Oh wouldn't you like to know"
John raised an interested eyebrow
Of course Brady saw this from is place by the stairs and quickly broke them
out of there private conversation. "Umm Chloe dear..I believe we have a job
to do...Victor is starting to smell"
"Yeah yeah.just when I'm trying to get some business done you have to go and
remind me about the wrinkly ol' pear on the floor" Chloe says as she walks
over to Brady and Victor.
John follows Chloe over to Brady and notices Victor lying on the bottom of
the stairs dead.
"Holy sh*t when did bob dole get here!?" Chloe and Brady rolled there eyes
and crouched down to get Victor. "It's Victor..and yes he is dead and no I
didn't kill him..Sami did" Chloe replied while grabbing a hold of Victors
feet. "Sami?!..How did she manage to do that?" asked John
"Oh her and Victor were doing it on the bathroom floor upstairs and he had a
heart attack" Brady replied grabbing a hold of Victors arms. John almost
fell on the floor he started laughing so hard. "Omg are u kidding me.?!"
"No they aren't" Marlena replied coming down the stairs. John looked up to
see Marlena and raised another questioning eyebrow at her. Marlena noticed
John's questioning eyes and replied "Don't look at me like that John Black I
know what I'm doing..I have this all under control"
John still kept his questioning stare "Uh huh riight..well then where is
the sex-killing pariah now?"
"You'll eat your words John Black before I turn u into one-nut man like my
good pal Brady here" Sami replied coming down the stairs touching Brady on
the shoulder and smiling sweetly at John.
"Ah so nice of you Sami to join us..did u have a nice nap?" Marlena asked
smiling smugly. "As a matter of fact I did..and don't worry I'm not done
with you yet" Sami replied. "Wait a minute! Did I miss something here?
One-nut man?" John asked. Immediately Brady's face turn a couple shades of
red.
"You know what! If I hear that one more time..i'm gonna!" "You're gonna
what?" Sami said poising her knee up slightly. Brady gulped then replied
"Nevermind" Chloe smirked but then reminded everyone that they still had a
dead body to take care. "All right enough bashing my man here! We still have
Victor to tend to"
(Ding Dong)
Everyone's faces went pale and they turned to the door.
"Gregrelli's Pizza!" came a voice on the other end of the door.
Everyone went wide-eyed and turned back to Sami. Sami looked at all the
faces around her some confused, shocked and others angry. "what?!" she asked
innocently "I thought everyone might get hungry later"
"Listen you tunnel with no exit, we have a dead body on the floor BECAUSE of your horny ass
and then you order a PIZZA," Chloe tells Sami but then she calms done. "What kind of pizza did
you get?"
"Plain. Nothing on it."
"BITCH! Plain?! Who the hell orders just plain? And no pepperoni? Stupid! I hope you know
that I ain't paying for it," Chloe says walking off.
As Sami goes to get the pizza, Brady grabs a blanket from the sofa and lays it on Victor and
suddenly jumps on the blanket making it looks like he is relaxing on the blanket on the floor.
"Hey. That will be $12.50," says teenage looking pizza-dude.
"OK, but hold on. I have a coupon for $2.00 discount.," Sami replies while looking in her purse.
Chloe enters the room while hearing what Sami said. Chloe flops on the couch while looking at
Sami and drinking a CORONA!! "Oh, how did you get that Sami. Was it a prize for how many
men you go down on a week? Did you pass the record and get $2.00 off on a pizza?" She
scratches her chin. "Well, where does that put you now. I thought you were a $2.00 ho, but
nowww....the coupon makes you what? A free ho?"
Sami gives the boy a coupon and $10.50. "Here you go."
Being a teenage boy with a stupid job says, "What? No tip?"
Sami does her flirting thing again! "Oh? You want a tip? Here." With that she grabs his face and
gives me longggg kiss.
Chloe smiles and laughs at the boy's dazed face. "Hey kid. It may seem like a good tip, but she
just gave you a whole lot of medical bills with the STD'S she just gave your ass."
Sami waves bye bye and slams the door in his face. "I have been clean of those for 3 months
already."
"Oh really? And when was the last time you checked?"
Mumbled by Sami. "Three months ago."
John, Marlena, and Chloe laugh and says in unison. "Dumbass!!"
End of Chapter 5.
Author's Note: I hope you understand the "tunnel with no exit." The jokes I use for Sami will
refer to sex, mostly. So if you didn't get the joke, that clue should have helped. Don't worry, I
have some more of them.