Several hours later the sound of the door chimes awakened her. 'Will, darn.' She couldn't just ignore him, she was painfully aware of that. Talk about pain…' Her hands were aching; she looked down at them and felt terror flood through her as she realized they were bleeding...heavily. Almost her entire hands and wrists were covered in blood. 'What happened?' The door chimes penetrated her ears. 'I can't let him see this!'
"Just a moment Will!" She_heard_his body colliding against the doors and quickly walked to her wash table to clean the blood off. Fortunately she got her hands clean quickly, but the little wounds were still bleeding.
"Computer; two blood restraining gloves." She grabbed the gloves out of thin air and slid her hands in. 'Dammit, my nightgown!' 'This day is going just great.' With her left hand she abruptly gestured at her body.
"Computer: clean gown."
"Deanna?"
"Just a sec. Will!" She waited until her gown was clean before she walked to the doors and opened them. Will stumbled in; apparently he had been leaning against them and hadn't counted on her opening them.
"Well, that's one way to enter a lady's quarters." Grinning, he looked up.
"I woke you, didn't I?" The Betazoid crossed her arms in front of her and looked at him accusingly.
"Yes you did." His eyes fell on her gloves and he advanced towards her to take her hands into his.
"Why on earth are you wearing those?" 'Good question...how will I explain?'
"I, uhh, I wanted to run an icy-holoprogram." 'What a lousy excuse!'
"In your nightgown?"
"Well...no, I just wanted to see if they still fit." He looked at her in disbelief and obviously didn't believe a word of what she was saying.
"Deanna, hands don't grow."
"I know that. So, were you able to explain things to Lyanna?" Normally an attempt like that to change the subject wouldn't have worked, but things weren't normal now.
"I think so, I told her that I took you home to rest."
"Well, that isn't a lie, is it." Will realized that she meant something more to that, but he didn't get it.
"No it isn't. So, how are you feeling?"
"Fine, rested." 'Furious!'
"Have you figured out what happened down there?" Was he really concerned about her, or was he just making sure it wasn't_his_fault?
"No, but I guess I should've eaten something before beaming down." Disapprovingly he shook his head.
"Deanna, Deanna you know very well that you can't work on an empty stomach." His patronizing voice was too much for her and for a moment she let her mask down.
"Don't you_DARE_talk to me like that! I_CAN_take care of myself Will Riker!" Scared by her seemingly sudden fury he backed off.
"Hey, take it easy!" Her eyes shot fire when they met his but softened in the very same second.
"I'm sorry..." 'NO I'M NOT!' "...you just sounded a bit too much like my mother."
"Oh...I'm sorry for that." He couldn't think of what else to say. "I actually dropped by to see if you were coming to the poker game tonight. It's sort of a farewell party." The pain was clearly visible in her eyes, but he didn't look. Like before Deanna managed a bittersweet smile.
"A hundred Klingons couldn't keep me away."
"Really? I might want to test that." 'How can he act so damn light?'
"Will, I have some work to do...I'll see you at the poker game alright." He tried to catch her eyes, but she evaded his gaze hastily.
"Alright, I'll see you then." Will Riker left her quarters without once looking back. If things had been normal, her behaviour would have more than worried him..._had_things been normal. Deanna felt tears sting in her eyes, but they didn't come and they wouldn't. She promised herself that she wouldn't cry. She pulled the gloves off and inspected her hands. The small but deep wounds were still bleeding; when she washed the blood away she saw the shapes of her nails imprinted in her flesh. The warm water made her cry out in pain. 'Well, back to work then.' She sat down behind her desk and began working through the incredibly high mountain of PADDS on her desk.
Crusher to Troi; Deanna, are you going to Mok'Ba'Rah class?
"Yes, why?"
Because you were supposed to meet me at the Holodeck 5 minutes ago.
"O dammit! Sorry, I forgot." She heard her friend laughing on the other side of the comm.
Don't worry.
"I'll be there right away." Deanna stood up abruptly, colliding against the table in her hurry. The mountain began to totter and despite her attempts to keep it standing PADDS fell everywhere.
"Oh forget it! Computer:
Mok'Ba'Rah outfit." Her clothing altered and Deanna headed to the
Holodeck.
"I'm terribly sorry Beverly."
"No need to apologize, it happens to the best of us." Deanna frowned and followed her friend into the Holodeck. She couldn't avoid noticing the doctor's flushed cheeks.
"I assume the Captain's physical went pretty well." Instantly Beverly turned around and looked straight into her friend's laughing face, causing her cheeks to become even redder.
"Yes, he's in perfect physical health...and condition." They both broke down in a fit of giggles.
"Thank you so much for bringing us together Deanna."
"Hey, I have to do something to earn my shore leave, don't I?" Sheepishly Beverly looked at the Betazoid who appeared to be dead serious.
"What?"
"My shore leave. Now that you two will go together there will be more space for me to pick from. Besides, the Captain promised me four extra months." The redhead let her eyes slide close and bent her head for a second.
"Let's just start our exercises, all right? We've already lost ten minutes because of a certain Betazoid psychologist."
"Oh yeah, just keep using it against me." Deanna acted as if she was almost hurt, something Beverly immediately picked up on.
"It's the first time I used it against you." She saw Deanna thinking about that and quickly added, "But it will certainly_not_be the last Counselor." The taller woman quickly began her exercises before the smaller one could reply. Muttering something to herself Deanna stepped next to Beverly and synchronized her movements with the ones of the woman next to her, carefully keeping the insides of her hands out of sight. They both worked hard and were deeply concentrating. Though Neither of them was actually concentrating on the exercises at hand. Suddenly a loud sigh broke through the silence and the Counselor let her arms fall alongside her body.
"That's it, I give up." Startled and not understanding the Doctor straightened her back and watched Deanna walk to a bench against the wall.
"Exactly_what_do you give up?"
"Doing my exercises today." Beverly frowned, very obviously confused.
"I can't concentrate, it must be a consequence of my black out earlier." It sure sounded logical, didn't it? The redhead was about to say something in return but Deanna cut her off.
"Oh no, don't you dare lecture me, Beverly Crusher; you weren't exactly concentrating either." Her cheeks flushed immediately at the realization of what the empath had picked up.
"All right, I admit it: I'm guilty; so sue me." The Doctor raised her hands and let them fall down, indicating her surrender. A smile washed over the Betazoid's delicate features; sessions like these with her best friend always had a good influence on her and lightened her mood.
"Hand me a towel will you?" For a brief moment Deanna let her down guard as she passed her the towel; she left her palms turned upwards when Beverly pulled the towel away. Her eyes caught the four dark lacerations before Deanna could turn her hand down. Beverly leaned forward to grab her friend's injured hand; she tossed her towel carelessly onto the floor.
"Deanna what the hell happened?!" Her gaze didn't reveal anything, it just shifted from her hand to the blue eyes of the woman in front of her and back; looking at the hand as if it was someone else's.
"These lacerations were caused by your nails! I want an explanation for that young lady." She was in trouble; Beverly only used that endearment when she was_really_angry with her. Nonetheless Deanna couldn't help laughing.
"Young? Which exactly makes you...?"
"Dammit Deanna I'm serious! What is this?" Roughly she lifted her hand up. "Some kind of self punishment?!" 'And exactly how_am_I going to explain this?' She stared into the blue gaze of the CMO, buying herself some time.
"I, uh, I'm not sure really. I suppose I was clenching my fists during a nightmare or something." 'The last days_have_been a nightmare after all, just one that won't end.'
"The other one, is it just as bad?" Docilely she showed her other hand as well.
"Oh, terrific." The sarcasm was tangible. "Tell me again: WHY didn't you come to Sickbay?"
"I haven't had the time yet."
"That's BULL Deanna and you know it!" She bent her head, causing ebony tendrils to fall down and partially cover her face. Silently she agreed with Beverly's words.
'I shouldn't have been so harsh on her. But she_should've_ come to Sickbay. She knows full well that all injuries_have_to be reported.' "Let's go to Sickbay and heal those nasty wounds. They must be rather painful." Her anger had slipped away for the most part and was replaced with concern. Deanna nodded slowly; she only now realized just how much they hurt. Apparently she had instinctively closed her mind to the pain.
In Sickbay Beverly cleaned the wounds and healed them as best as she could.
"I can't heal them entirely; the last part will have to heal on its own." Her dark hair spilled around her shoulders when she nodded at her Doctor once again. The Counselor hopped off the biobed for the second time that day and thanked Beverly.
"Just don't let it happen again." Her voice was strict yet friendly; a trait she had always appreciated and admired in her friend.
"I won't." She gave the redhead a reassuring smile and left.
~D~