Here is episode 2 "Satan wants to see the Meercats", now worship it like
the relic that it is...
If you use it as toilet paper, you have defied the Gods, and will very
likely suffer their wrath next Thursday. The only way to read this is
while listening to spanish guitar music. Go now, read today, time wastes.
Goenitz, Yashiro, Shermie, Chris: The gang, the fab 4, the main cast
Omega Rugal: Psychotic boss of King of Fighters '98, the coolest thing
about him is a win pose where he slashes across his chest.
Kim: He's a KOF character that most people think of as somewhat cool. Our opinion of him is no different. Long live Tae Kwon Do!!!
Iori: Manager of the Potato in Chainmail / crazy psychopath
Remy: Very thin guy, probably early 20's. Has long light-green hair that flows with the wind. He is from France.
Hugo: Big, VERY BIG, like 7'+. He looks kinda like Andre the Giant. I think he's supposed to be Hungarian, though he fights in Germany in Street Fighter III: Third Strike
K' & Maxima: Two Xtremely cool guys from KOF '99. 'Nuff said.
90210 kids: Not worth the crap they're made of...
Generic sitcom music starts. "3 Kids and Goenitz" flashes across the
screen. Pictures of New York, mostly in black and white, flash.
Then the title again. More pictures. A giant letter Q. Then a picture
Goenitz, Yashiro, Shermie and Chris doing the famous Beatle picture
where they are walking across a cross walk. The title again, followed
by the subtitle, "Satan wants to see the meercats."
Fades to Yashiro, Shermie, and Chris painting the walls of the living
room white. The furniture is on the floor and covered with sheets,
except for a table that is still nailed to the ceiling.
Chris-"Whew, I'm thirsty."
Yashiro-"Likewise. By the time we finish painting, Iori's will be
open and we can stop by for some refreshments."
Shermie-"Hey, we're almost out of paint. We'll have to buy some more
as well."
Goenitz walks in followed by a BIG ornery man.(clapping and cheering)
Goenitz-"What's that? We're almost out of paint? Well then start painting faster before we run out. Oh wait, why was I here? Yes, I remember now. Look, I found good ol' Uncle Omega Rugal. Now you kids are gonna go to the zoo with him while I do some, uh, work......."
Omega Rugal-"Come along children, Satan wants to see the meercats."
(laugh track)
Yashiro, Shermie, and Chris put down their paintbrushes and such,
then follow Rugal out. faded out
We enter at the zoo on a sunny morning. The place is infested with lots of little kids and families. Rugal looks more out of place than one of
those, uh..., midgets, at a tall-dude convention...
Chris-"DAMN! Little kids suck......"
Omega Rugal-"HARHARHAR!!! Ya'll sure is funay'"
They walk down the path until they came across the first animal
exibit, the ancient and ever elusive beast...RISING ZAN!!! The samurai
gun-man Yashiro picks up a dirt clod and throws it at Zan, hitting him
in the face. Zan topples to the ground. (laugh track)
Omega Rugal-"HARHARHAR!!! Deese animals here funay'!!! HARHARHAR!!"
Shermie-"Hey! They're selling churros here! Les get some!"
They walk to the churros stand and are greeted by the worker dude, Kim.
(Clapping and cheering)
Kim-"Howdy ya'll! Would ya'll lahk to trah dis hea' churro?"
Shermie-"Kim! I thought you were Korean!"
Kim-"Yeah. Sowlth Korean. (Laugh track) So ya wanna churro or naht?"
Omega Rugal-"Don't sass me young man! We demand satisfaction! Now hand
over all of your suitcases bearing a Zanzibar sticker and Destrega
CD's."
(Laugh track)
Kim-"Uhwhanow? Ah only say-le churros."
Yashiro-"Don't mind him, he's just out of his gourd. We'll take four
churros, please."
Kim (hands them food)-"Here ya'll go! Don't forget to see the meercats!"
Omega Rugal (walking off towards the distance)-"Don't worry, we won't...
We won't, oh no we won't... HARHARHAR!!" (Laugh track)
The four didn't stop to see the other animals; they just kept walking
'til they came to the end of the line! The meercat exhibit... destination.
There is a man leaning on the rail screaming profanities at the meercats.
Mystery man-"Ahhhhh....! You bloody ground weasels are the decline
of western civilization! You and all o'yer Communist like!"
(laugh track)
Omega Rugal-"Well, someone's got their knickers in a twist."
Yashiro-"Huh? That voice sounds familiar......"
Shermie-"Can it be........?"
Yashiro, Shermie-"IORI!!!!"
The mystery man turns around. It is in fact, the man known as Iori.
Iori- "Yo. Hey you'se guys, was' yo' fancy?"
Yashiro-"Hey Iori, aren't you supposed to be opening your cafe in about....(checks his watch) now?" (laugh track)
Iori-"Uh.........Hugo and Remy will cover for me.....I think...Unless they're as drunk as me, those bastards..." (laugh track)
Omega Rugal-"Awwww.....the wee lad has a drinking problem! Well-"
Iori-"I DON'T HAVE A DRINKING PROBLEM!!!!!!! I...I'm just really thirsty is all... Thirsty for hard liquor..." (laugh track)
Chris-"Hehheh.."
Shermie-"Iori, you need to confront your drinking problem."
Iori breaks down crying. (aaawwwwwww......)-"You're right...(sniff)...I need to stop this habit... or it'll kill me. Actually, I was planing on being hit by a car next year... but that is not the point. Now the only pleasure I have in life is taunting animals..."
Chris-"Cough."
Iori-"YES!! I will get rid of my alcohol abuse!!!"
Yashiro, Shermie, Rugal, Chris-"Hurray for Iori, away with alcohol abuse!!"
Iori (whispers)-"When Frank Stallone wins an oscar." (laugh track)
Chris-"Okay, we saw the meercats, can we go now?"
Yashiro-"Yeah, I'm hungry, let's go eat." fade out
Fade in at Potato in Chainmail. K', Maxima, and the crappy 90210 kids were all there. A big Hungarian guy and a French guy were working the counter.
Remy (lights a cigarette)-"Iori! Where were you? We opened an hour ago."
Iori-"Funny story. I was captured while fighting for my country in Nam, and forced to make Nike's at gun point." (laugh track)
Hugo-"You never went to war, and that happened to me, you drunken idiot."
Remy-"Anyway-"
Dumbass from 90210-"He-llo!! I ordered Zima, not emphazyma!! Can't you read? There's no smoking in here!"
Remy (blows smoke in their general direction)-"Unfortunately, they don't teach you how to read and write in a concentration camp."
90210 Kid (feeling sorry)-"Really?"
Remy (shruges)-"Beats the hell outuv me. K', Maxima-" Points to the group of shit heads. "KILL! Do them in K' and M style. Don't stop the
bone-breakin' til sundown!!"
K'-"Oh yeah!"
Big fight scene. 90210 bastards lose miserably.
(scene censored by the network... alot of drinking and smoking...)
Yashiro, Shermie & Chris exit the Potato in Chailmail. The sun is set,
over a metropolis of shadows, people are coming home from work, others,
are merely seizing the day now, our friends are going back to their flat.
Lights of civilization gleam, sending messages of productivity, where
our friends just had a drunken ho-down, and are returning home...
Credits Roll
Song by Men without Jobs plays
If you use it as toilet paper, you have defied the Gods, and will very
likely suffer their wrath next Thursday. The only way to read this is
while listening to spanish guitar music. Go now, read today, time wastes.
Goenitz, Yashiro, Shermie, Chris: The gang, the fab 4, the main cast
Omega Rugal: Psychotic boss of King of Fighters '98, the coolest thing
about him is a win pose where he slashes across his chest.
Kim: He's a KOF character that most people think of as somewhat cool. Our opinion of him is no different. Long live Tae Kwon Do!!!
Iori: Manager of the Potato in Chainmail / crazy psychopath
Remy: Very thin guy, probably early 20's. Has long light-green hair that flows with the wind. He is from France.
Hugo: Big, VERY BIG, like 7'+. He looks kinda like Andre the Giant. I think he's supposed to be Hungarian, though he fights in Germany in Street Fighter III: Third Strike
K' & Maxima: Two Xtremely cool guys from KOF '99. 'Nuff said.
90210 kids: Not worth the crap they're made of...
Generic sitcom music starts. "3 Kids and Goenitz" flashes across the
screen. Pictures of New York, mostly in black and white, flash.
Then the title again. More pictures. A giant letter Q. Then a picture
Goenitz, Yashiro, Shermie and Chris doing the famous Beatle picture
where they are walking across a cross walk. The title again, followed
by the subtitle, "Satan wants to see the meercats."
Fades to Yashiro, Shermie, and Chris painting the walls of the living
room white. The furniture is on the floor and covered with sheets,
except for a table that is still nailed to the ceiling.
Chris-"Whew, I'm thirsty."
Yashiro-"Likewise. By the time we finish painting, Iori's will be
open and we can stop by for some refreshments."
Shermie-"Hey, we're almost out of paint. We'll have to buy some more
as well."
Goenitz walks in followed by a BIG ornery man.(clapping and cheering)
Goenitz-"What's that? We're almost out of paint? Well then start painting faster before we run out. Oh wait, why was I here? Yes, I remember now. Look, I found good ol' Uncle Omega Rugal. Now you kids are gonna go to the zoo with him while I do some, uh, work......."
Omega Rugal-"Come along children, Satan wants to see the meercats."
(laugh track)
Yashiro, Shermie, and Chris put down their paintbrushes and such,
then follow Rugal out. faded out
We enter at the zoo on a sunny morning. The place is infested with lots of little kids and families. Rugal looks more out of place than one of
those, uh..., midgets, at a tall-dude convention...
Chris-"DAMN! Little kids suck......"
Omega Rugal-"HARHARHAR!!! Ya'll sure is funay'"
They walk down the path until they came across the first animal
exibit, the ancient and ever elusive beast...RISING ZAN!!! The samurai
gun-man Yashiro picks up a dirt clod and throws it at Zan, hitting him
in the face. Zan topples to the ground. (laugh track)
Omega Rugal-"HARHARHAR!!! Deese animals here funay'!!! HARHARHAR!!"
Shermie-"Hey! They're selling churros here! Les get some!"
They walk to the churros stand and are greeted by the worker dude, Kim.
(Clapping and cheering)
Kim-"Howdy ya'll! Would ya'll lahk to trah dis hea' churro?"
Shermie-"Kim! I thought you were Korean!"
Kim-"Yeah. Sowlth Korean. (Laugh track) So ya wanna churro or naht?"
Omega Rugal-"Don't sass me young man! We demand satisfaction! Now hand
over all of your suitcases bearing a Zanzibar sticker and Destrega
CD's."
(Laugh track)
Kim-"Uhwhanow? Ah only say-le churros."
Yashiro-"Don't mind him, he's just out of his gourd. We'll take four
churros, please."
Kim (hands them food)-"Here ya'll go! Don't forget to see the meercats!"
Omega Rugal (walking off towards the distance)-"Don't worry, we won't...
We won't, oh no we won't... HARHARHAR!!" (Laugh track)
The four didn't stop to see the other animals; they just kept walking
'til they came to the end of the line! The meercat exhibit... destination.
There is a man leaning on the rail screaming profanities at the meercats.
Mystery man-"Ahhhhh....! You bloody ground weasels are the decline
of western civilization! You and all o'yer Communist like!"
(laugh track)
Omega Rugal-"Well, someone's got their knickers in a twist."
Yashiro-"Huh? That voice sounds familiar......"
Shermie-"Can it be........?"
Yashiro, Shermie-"IORI!!!!"
The mystery man turns around. It is in fact, the man known as Iori.
Iori- "Yo. Hey you'se guys, was' yo' fancy?"
Yashiro-"Hey Iori, aren't you supposed to be opening your cafe in about....(checks his watch) now?" (laugh track)
Iori-"Uh.........Hugo and Remy will cover for me.....I think...Unless they're as drunk as me, those bastards..." (laugh track)
Omega Rugal-"Awwww.....the wee lad has a drinking problem! Well-"
Iori-"I DON'T HAVE A DRINKING PROBLEM!!!!!!! I...I'm just really thirsty is all... Thirsty for hard liquor..." (laugh track)
Chris-"Hehheh.."
Shermie-"Iori, you need to confront your drinking problem."
Iori breaks down crying. (aaawwwwwww......)-"You're right...(sniff)...I need to stop this habit... or it'll kill me. Actually, I was planing on being hit by a car next year... but that is not the point. Now the only pleasure I have in life is taunting animals..."
Chris-"Cough."
Iori-"YES!! I will get rid of my alcohol abuse!!!"
Yashiro, Shermie, Rugal, Chris-"Hurray for Iori, away with alcohol abuse!!"
Iori (whispers)-"When Frank Stallone wins an oscar." (laugh track)
Chris-"Okay, we saw the meercats, can we go now?"
Yashiro-"Yeah, I'm hungry, let's go eat." fade out
Fade in at Potato in Chainmail. K', Maxima, and the crappy 90210 kids were all there. A big Hungarian guy and a French guy were working the counter.
Remy (lights a cigarette)-"Iori! Where were you? We opened an hour ago."
Iori-"Funny story. I was captured while fighting for my country in Nam, and forced to make Nike's at gun point." (laugh track)
Hugo-"You never went to war, and that happened to me, you drunken idiot."
Remy-"Anyway-"
Dumbass from 90210-"He-llo!! I ordered Zima, not emphazyma!! Can't you read? There's no smoking in here!"
Remy (blows smoke in their general direction)-"Unfortunately, they don't teach you how to read and write in a concentration camp."
90210 Kid (feeling sorry)-"Really?"
Remy (shruges)-"Beats the hell outuv me. K', Maxima-" Points to the group of shit heads. "KILL! Do them in K' and M style. Don't stop the
bone-breakin' til sundown!!"
K'-"Oh yeah!"
Big fight scene. 90210 bastards lose miserably.
(scene censored by the network... alot of drinking and smoking...)
Yashiro, Shermie & Chris exit the Potato in Chailmail. The sun is set,
over a metropolis of shadows, people are coming home from work, others,
are merely seizing the day now, our friends are going back to their flat.
Lights of civilization gleam, sending messages of productivity, where
our friends just had a drunken ho-down, and are returning home...
Credits Roll
Song by Men without Jobs plays