Chains of Destiny

Ch 2: Love Breaks the Heart

By Oniko

Hikaru closed her eyes and relaxed as the maid brushed her long ruby locks. The gentle pull was relaxing and she found herself dozing off in the chair. She was only half-aware of the door to her room opening and the sound of voices but she was so tired she found it difficult to focus on anything. Maybe taking that draught that Clef made for her wasn't such a good idea.

She finally found the strength to move and looked up to stare into Lantis' dark eyes. He was standing over her chair and looking down at her. "Lantis?"

"I need to speak with you, Hikaru." He said while her tired and drugged mind was still trying to cope with the fact that Lantis was in her room.

"Can this wait until tomorrow? I'm kinda tired right now." She got shakily to her feet. He caught her easily when she stumbled.

"No. It can't." He spoke softly staring into her eyes bare inches apart. She found herself blushing as his closeness.

"I…what could…" she stammered briefly before falling silent under his intense gaze. She could feel the breath squeezed out of her lungs as she realized what he wanted to talk about. She pushed against him to stand on her own. "We have nothing to talk about."

"Hikaru…" he pleaded, she turned away from him with tears in her eyes why does he have to push this? She cried out is surprise when he grabbed her arm and pulled her back against him. But his mouth pressed over hers, smothering her cry. Against her better judgment she found herself responding to his kiss and when he pulled away a small whimper escaped her throat. He murmured softly "Hikaru, I love you."

She felt a confusing twist of pain and joy and sorrow sear her heat "Lantis, please don't do this."

"I cannot deny the depth of the feeling in my heart or the truth of it I know is in yours." He spoke softly, his eyes never leaving hers. "Why should we deny it from each other?"

"Because it destroyed Emeraude and Zagato. Do you think it will do any less to us?" She rested her head against Lantis' shoulder. With the confusing mixture of heady emotions and Clef's sleeping draught she was feeling rather dizzy.

"Hikaru. I am not my brother. I don't give a damn about my responsibilities. I only agreed to become High Priest to be with you. Hikaru, look at me." He lifted her chin gently to force her eyes to meet his. "I am not going to repeat my brother's life. And I am not going to let you make me. I love you, Hikaru. And believe me that is more than Zagato ever said to Emeraude."

As Pillar Hikaru had grown accustomed to reading her heart and never before had she known such joy and such light. She closed her eyes and tried to focus, she had to remain calm and in control. But it was so hard when the man she loved above all else stood so close and professed his love for her. He held her in a strong, warm embrace and she wanted to stay in his arms forever. Or at least for one night. Couldn't she be weak for just one night in her life? She wrapped her arms around his neck and sobbed "Lantis, I love you."

... ... ...

Hikaru awake to warmth and smiled. Lantis had his arms wrapped around her holding her in a tight embrace, even in his sleep. She could feel his breath tickling the back of her neck where he buried his face in her hair. She barely stifled the urge to giggle, she was so happy. Everything was perfect.

She cuddled with him for a few moments longer before starting to untangle herself from him. Much to her relief she managed to do so without waking him up. She know he spent most of the night awake watching her because every time she awoke from one of her frequent nightmares he was there, comforting her. Without summoning her maids she sat at her vanity and began working through the knotted mess her hair had become over the night. Her fingers hadn't forgotten the patterns as she braided her hair into its simple plait. It had been a long time since she had done this herself. She smiled brightly at her reflection today was a good day, she could feel it. She would will it. Dressed simply in a soft pink gown of flowing silk she made her way to her throne room.

It was a huge room filled with marble pillars and bright banners. At the far end of the room was a massive throne of white marble. It was carved in intricate patterns that reminded her of flames and it was covered in cushions of red and gold. She relaxed into the soft cushions, clasped her hands over her heart and began to pray.

At first it was difficult. Her mind kept wandering back to Lantis. Her training in meditation at her family's dojo was invaluable at moments like this and after a brief exercise her mind was calm and she could listen to her heart. Her heart was filled with light just as bright as last night. She began her daily routine of meditation and prayer and if her thoughts strayed towards Lantis a little more often than usual, no one was the wiser.

"There you are." She opened her eyes to see Lantis standing before her, judging by the light filtering through the stained glass windows it was almost noon. She smiled brightly at him.

"And where else would I be?"

"I don't know but when I woke up alone this morning I was worried."

"Worried? About what?"

"That it was a dream. That I had made a mistake." He stepped up to the throne and pulled her into a tight embrace. "That you didn't really love me."

"Of course I love you, Lantis." She said, her voice slightly muffled as she buried her face into his shoulder. "I've always loved you."

His arms tightened around her. "Please, don't leave me."

"Never." She promised.

Her days settled into a wonderful routine after that. She still spent her days in meditation and prayer but the intense pressure she usually felt was gone. She found very little darkness in her heart to pray for. And with Lantis by her side day and night she almost forgot her fears.

Why didn't I give in sooner? Hikaru asked herself as she contemplated her perfect life. It was early in the morning and she was going to the throne room to begin her prayers when she heard agitated voices echoing down the hall. Curious, she followed the sound to one of the lesser halls. Upon opening the door Hikaru was overwhelmed by the stench. She identified it almost immediately. One doesn't easily forget the stench of blood and death.

Inside she saw a row of bodies, some of them must have still been alive because she could hear them moaning in pain, but she couldn't see how, they were all so badly mangled. Clef, Lafarga and some villagers were talking, some very heatedly. It was their voices she heard.

Hikaru held onto the door to support her suddenly weak and trembling legs. She could only stare in shock at the bodies as her mind finally understood what the others were discussing, monsters. They where too involved in their conversation to notice her presence, and she over heard more than she wanted to. Monsters once again roamed across Cephiro in numbers. Monsters weren't exactly rare, even with a strong Pillar but suddenly several weeks ago they became stronger and their numbers grew beyond counting. They grew strong enough to attack a well-armed town. She shook her head not understanding how it was possible, her prayers should have protected these people from the monsters their fears created.

It was then that one of the men noticed her presence. He dropped to his knees and bowed his head in a very European genuflection. "Princess."

Clef spun around and made an odd halted movement to the side, as if he tried to block the bodies from her sight but realized that it was too late. She stared into ancient, sorrowful eyes that looked out from a child's face. He was worried, and sad. She turned, and ran before anyone could voice the question that was ringing in her head. Why? Why had she let this happen?

She threw herself down on the cushions in her throne room and tried to calm herself, tried to read the raging chaos that was her heart. Now there was sorrow and anguish staining the light that filled her heart. But why now, when she should have felt the darkness as it formed. The people's fears created the monsters and ills that plagued Cephiro, and her hear was a reflection of Cephiro. But now the only darkness she felt was her own grief at another's pain. Hikaru's eyes flew open. That was it. That was the key. She could only read her own emotions. Her heart was no longer Cephiro's.

She buried her face in her hands and sobbed. When she gave in to her love for Lantis she lost her connection to Cephiro. Some how, she had to re-align her heart to Cephiro's. She was still the Pillar and would be until death, but she feared what she would have to do.

"Hikaru?" She jumped at Clef's soft voice. "Are you all right?"

"Yes." She wiped tears from her eyes. "Just in shock."

"I'm sorry you had to see that. And I'm sorry we didn't tell you earlier." Clef said, standing before her "We didn't want to worry you. Lafarga and I thought it best to find the cause before disturbing you."

Hikaru felt her eyes tear up. He doesn't know, she thought miserably He doesn't know that it's all my fault. Hikaru felt him lay a comforting hand on her shoulder and heard his soothing words without really listening. She was too focused on her own inner agony and his gentle comfort only made her feel worse. No matter the cost she was the Pillar and would do her duty. She would be stronger then Emeraude, though it breaks her heart. Hikaru leaned against Clef and cried in pain at what she would do to Lantis, and to herself, in order to restore Cephiro.

... ... ...

She began to implement her half-formed plan after recovering from her breakdown on Cleft's shoulder. First step is always the hardest, avoiding Lantis at all costs. He had already made it clear that he didn't care about Cephiro and he wouldn't understand why she must restore Cephiro's heart. She needed to minimize contact with him because every time she saw him her heart was filled with joy and love, her joy and love not Cephiro's, and she needed to cleanse her emotions from her heart so she could focus on Cephiro.

She told her guards that she wasn't feeling well and didn't wish to be disturbed by anyone. The moment she shut the door her spacious suite felt small and stifling. Hikaru paced anxiously. How would Lantis react to her shutting him out? He was normally a quiet and gentle man but under that gentleness was an iron will that had shattered weaker opponents. She heard muffled voices, and ran to press her ear to the door to catch the conversation.

"…Princess does not wish to be disturbed." One of the guards was saying.

"If she is ill, perhaps I may help." Lantis said sounding oh-so-reasonable. Hikaru felt a stabbing pain in her chest.

"I'm sorry my lord but those are the Princess' orders." The guard replied, sounding very unhappy about the situation. There was a long silence, an eternity, before Lantis' curt reply. "Very well."

Hikaru sighed in relief, he wasn't going to make a scene and demand entrance to her room. He was going to respect her desire for privacy. She clasped her hands to her chest as the pain in her heart took her breath away. She had to do this. It was the only way to restore Cephiro's peace.

She barely slept at all that night. Instead she lay awake staring at the ceiling and crying silent tears. Early the next morning, or more accurately a few hours later she made her way to her throne room and gave the guards the same orders, that she was not to be disturbed by anyone. Again Lantis was turned away at the door. Fresh tears streamed down her cheeks and she wondered how long she could keep avoiding him. She could just hope it was long enough for her heart to stop breaking at the thought of him.

It wasn't. It was barely three days before he caught up with her. It was early, hours yet until dawn and she was barely five feet from the sanctuary of her prayer room when his voice rang out behind her. "Hikaru!"

She froze, even her heart stopped a moment before she was overwhelmed with the pain of heartbreak.

"Hikaru, we need to talk." His voice was strong and commanding. She wanted nothing more than to turn and run to his arms and apologize. She took a deep breath and forced her frozen body to move forward. She could hear his footsteps echoing behind her, hurried but not running. When she reached the door she turned to one of her guards and gave what had become a standard order.

"I do not wish to be disturbed." She glanced back when Lantis called her name again. He was standing where she was moments ago, an eternity ago, when he called for her. As she looked strait at him she added "by anyone." And let the door slide shut.

She pressed her forehead against the door and tried, unsuccessfully, to forget the look of pain and confusion in his eyes. She could hear muffled voices arguing on the other side. She tried to block out the sounds. The sounds of him shouting, of violence, flesh striking flesh, of the pounding on the door and worst of all the pain and anger in his voice as he called for her to open the door. He would have broken the door down if he could, but in Cephiro will determined all and her will was greater than his.

When all was silent once again she turned away from the door, tears in her eyes. Her wavering vision fell on a small ceramic statuette of Mokona. The palace was so full of the cute little things that she had long ago ceased to notice them. She glared at it as if the little figurine was responsible for what was happening to her.

"Well, Mokona, are you happy?" She asked, her voice thick with raw emotions. "I tried to make this world a better place and now look at me, I failed everyone who ever depended on me."

In a sudden fit of rage she smashed the figurine and collapsed into tears "Damn you, Mokona. Why did you make me the Pillar?

She cried out, sobbing her hurt and pain into her hands, sounding more like a wounded animal than a girl. She wasn't sure how long she cried, and somehow even worse she wasn't sure when Clef entered and picked her up from the ground. After her tears gave her a momentary reprieve she looked up blearily into Clef's clear blue eyes. "Hikaru, what is wrong?"

She rested her head against his shoulder "Is this why Emeraude was crying all the time?"

"What?" Clef asked, brushing her hair back from her face. She pressed her hands over her heart.

"It hurts so much."

Clef frowned at her, he glanced at the broken pottery fragments. "Where are you hurt, Hikaru?"

"Oh, Clef. It's all my fault." She felt tears pricking at the corner of her eyes, again.

"What is your fault?" He asked in a gentle tone but frustration was still obvious in his voice.

"Everything…the monsters…Lantis…"she trailed off as the pain in her heart stole the breath from her lungs. Clef grabbed her shoulders and appeared bare moments away from shaking some sense into her. "What about Lantis?"

She looked up into his worried eyes. "Lantis? I love him. Help me, Clef. I love him."

... ... ...

AN: I must say this chapter was very hard to write and twice as hard to type. But I think it turned out well overall, please write a review and tell me your thoughts.