Disclaimer is the same as in chapter one.
Author's note at the end.
'But I won't cry for yesterday. There's an ordinary world, somehow I have to find. And as I try to make my way to the ordinary world, I will learn to survive.'-"Ordinary World" by Duran Duran.
"Hostile Takeover"-Chapter Twelve: The Breaking of the Fellowship
The look upon Sally's face before she disappeared struck Frodo harder than any physical blow he had ever received. Fear, pain, confusion, she felt too much in one moment for her to express. No matter his intentions, he knew he had done this to her. He knew it was his fault. He took another step forward to follow her. He wanted more than anything to help, to bring order to the flood of memories that bombarded her. His was the only face she had known in this life and that.
A strong but gentle touch to his shoulder stopped him. "You should let her go," Gandalf said. His voice was barely above a whisper.
"I should explain," Frodo protested. He tried to twist himself out of the wizard's grip but he lacked the strength that his human glamour had once given him. He never regretted being small. He just had tired of everyone else being so much bigger.
Gandalf's hand had tightened but not so much in restraint as in reassurance. "She has enough to deal with without having to endure another explanation."
Reluctantly, Frodo relaxed. "You're right," he sighed. In his mind, he could picture Sally running away. She was upset but she would not go far. She would not leave. "I've pushed too much on her," he said looking up at the towering wizard. He managed a weak smile. He had to believe that she would be alright. As much as he had feared how the return of Sam's memories would affect Sally, he could not deny that he had longed for this. From the moment that he knew that this was possible, a part of him had wished for it, leaving the rest of him to feel guilty for the pain she felt because of it. "I'll give her some time."
Gandalf shook his head sadly. "No, Frodo," he said gently. "You should let her go."
Frodo felt his heart grow heavy as a lump formed in his throat. He understood what Gandalf had proposed but he didn't want to believe it. After coming so far, after struggling with the question himself, he could not part with her. Now that the thought came to him again, he didn't want to. "But." he said in a voice thick with emotion, "she's Sam."
The wizard put his great arms around his friend. As he rested his hand on Frodo's head he could feel the effort the hobbit expelled to hold back his tears. "I know, Frodo, I know," he said bending over him. His larger frame almost seemed to shelter him. "You have suffered great loneliness without him."
Of all of his existence, the accumulated experiences of centuries, one memory tormented him above all others. The enormity of his pain had nearly crushed him. Nothing could compare to losing Sam. Only the joy of meeting Sally came close. Before he realized it, he had begun to weep, sobbing like a small child holding fast to his father's knee. "I missed him so, Gandalf," he choked. "I never wanted."
The rest of his words became lost in his tears.
He still grieved. The loss was ever fresh in his mind, like a recurring nightmare that plagued him day and night. Sam's death stood almost as a monument in time. When he died, Frodo felt the goodness within himself die along with him. What remained of Frodo seemed only mere shadow, like a wraith, a pale, doomed reflection of the hobbit he had been.
"You still must destroy the Ring," Gandalf said, reminding him of his purpose. He still held tightly to him not knowing if he provided any comfort in his presence or touch. He wanted his support to mean something to him now. No matter how painful his guidance must be, he would not fail him again. "It knows what you plan to do."
"I know," Frodo sobbed.
"If it can't influence you to change your mind, it will try to leave you," the wizard said in careful warning.
"I know," he repeated. His tears had begun to subside. His voice became stronger. His weakness and fear of being alone began to yield to the truth in Gandalf's words. His emotion had clouded him to the bigger picture. He had forgotten the danger was not only his.
Gandalf knelt down to look Frodo in the face. "You must continue alone," he said finally.
Frodo met his eyes unwillingly and sniffled without shame. What shame could he have in sadness he felt so deeply? He thought of his road ahead and despair placed its weight upon his heart. Sally had given him a hope he thought only lived in faint memories. Alone, he would have the cold comfort of purpose to drive him to his goal. But as much as the separation would hurt him he could not bear the thought of what it would do to her. He had tried to leave her before and found he couldn't. "Sally will not understand," he said sadly, "We've already come so far."
"It's not like before," Gandalf said. "Sam is human now, with all the strengths and frailties that come with it. The Ring will seek her out and she will not be able to resist it."
Frodo shut his eyes and bent his head in shame. The Ring. Anything that had any meaning in his life revolved around the Ring. It had damned him. It had saved him. It had taken Sam from him. It had brought Sally to him. Now because of it he would have to leave her. He remembered Amon Hen and when he tried to leave the fellowship. He remembered Boromir's madness. Did his fate await Sally?
With a human heart and the darkness of the world tainting her form, Sam no longer was the true company he had been before. Would the Ring drive Sam to betray his master? Frodo had to stop being selfish. He was far too old to desire such companionship over the fate of the world. Sally would have to understand. He was leaving her for her own sake.
* * *
Piper sat on the sidewalk wiping at her eyes with the palms of her hands. She looked up at the buildings and people that surrounded her with a purity of soul that astounded her. Amidst the confusion from the lifetime of old memories she found lost things that had eluded her in this life. Peregrin Took remembered well the shining towers of Minas Tirith.the White City. New York City dwarfed the memory like a colossus, with skyscrapers that looked down upon the clouds. Beautiful and terrible at the same time. Yet they seemed dirty, dark.tainted.
She could see the result of man's bravado towards evil. The world had lost its innocence, and sadly so had she. She could not help but wonder if humanity would have made this choice to face the darkness if they had known what would become of them? She knew that she would not.he would not. Did that make her any less brave?
That thought had sobered her enough to quell the last of her tears. Her hands had wet, black smears of lost mascara streaked across them. She stared at them, mesmerized by what had become of her, who she was once and who she was now and what had brought all of this to be. She could sit on that concrete for months and still the memories would not fall into place fittingly.
But the world would not wait for her to adjust. Her cell phone began to ring cheerfully, ignorant to the fact that its owner neither wanted music nor cheer. She opened her receiver automatically and said, "Hello?"
At first she heard only silence, just random background noise but a voice finally came through just as hesitant, just as lost as she felt. "Pip?"
Merrick. All of Piper's tears came back in a rush, a flood that only allowed her to answer in sobs. Merry.
Merrick's voice faltered. Adrift in a sea of recovered memory, he had shed his own tears. His world, which never fully made sense, had just taken a detour into madness. He reached out to the only person he knew would understand. "Something." he began haltingly. He almost told her that something was wrong but that didn't quite describe what he felt. "Something's happened to me."
"It's real!" Piper cried in declaration. His experience only confirmed the actuality of her own. "It's not a dream." She could feel his doubt. He had to know who she was. He had to know who he was. He had to realize that they were once part of something sacred. A thought came to her suddenly, colliding her past and present lives in a way that chilled her. An image presented itself to her, offering a glimmer of explanation. She couldn't believe she'd almost forgotten. Her voice shook. "I saw him," she said quietly. "He's alive. I saw him." She closed her eyes, savoring the memory of her encounter. She could almost remember the feel of his arms around her, hugging her like old friends. He knew. She realized it now. He knew even when she was blissfully ignorant.
Merrick continued to struggle, trying to put the pieces together as quickly as she. "Saw who?" he asked hesitantly through the phone.
"Frodo."
He knew the answer before she said it. It had simply become a pill too thick to swallow. Piper could almost see Merrick shaking his head in denial. He couldn't let go. He couldn't believe. "You.you couldn't have," he stammered. "It's not possible."
"I saw him," Piper insisted. The image had burned itself into her mind and her heart, a precious treasure that she would keep forever. Would she ever she him again now that she knew everything? "He and Sally drove away in my car."
"Sally." Merrick breathed. The thought trailed into silence. The name was enough.
"Oh my God," Piper gasped, "Sam."
Her life finally made sense. All those whom she loved, she had loved and cherished before. They had come back to her. They had come back together. No more searching. She knew exactly who she was. "This is really happening," she said. "You know that, don't you?"
"I know. I know," he sighed. He could no longer deny it. He had held his fate at a distance, keeping it always out of reach of what he had believed was reality, away from who he thought he was supposed to be.
"Why did this happen?" Piper asked. An edge of innocence had come to her voice. Old roles had begun to return to them. The younger hobbit looked to his older cousin for the answers his wisdom would grant him. "Why are we together? Why now?"
"It's got to be Frodo," Merrick answered. The words sounded strange but felt right as he said them. "Frodo and the Ring."
"You think Frodo brought us back?" she asked.
"No," he replied gravely. Not the Frodo they remembered. The act seemed uncharacteristically selfish. Something more divine must have its hand in this. He thought of his dream. Some things began to make sense. Others knew them before they knew themselves. "But we're here because of him."
Piper understood the direction of Merrick's thoughts. She saw their ultimate conclusion. "He's going to destroy it," she whispered. She closed her eyes with the realization, feeling a mixture of fear and relief over her old friend's actions. "He's finally going to destroy it."
"And Sam will be with him," Merrick added, "just like before."
"While we're left behind to fight his other battles," she agreed. The parallels between the past and present quests were painfully real. She clutched her cell phone tightly unable to express out loud the comfort she felt by knowing that she was not alone in this.
Merrick thought the same. He wanted to see her smiling face, feel the reassuring tug on his arm. He knew that with her, he wouldn't feel so afraid. Perhaps, he could still change his mind. "Where are you?" he asked.
Piper smiled sheepishly. She could have told him she was in any of her haunts in Chicago but after the truths they already shared, lying not longer seemed acceptable. "Manhattan," she admitted.
"Piper!" Merrick shouted into the phone. "Are you following me?"
"What did you expect me to do?" she cried. "Sit on your couch in Chicago? With what we know now, how can you leave me behind?"
"I just wanted you safe," he said, knowing that was only a pitiful excuse. He wanted her with him now. Their lives were intertwined just as much as Frodo's was with Sam. A danger to one was a danger they all shared.
"You can't fight fate, cousin," Piper said. "We're here for a reason."
"I suppose I should tell you where I'm going," he replied.
"Why?" she said, laughing. "Fate got me this far. I trust it to bring me the rest of the way."
* * *
A startled group of migrating birds first alerted Legolas to Sally's passing. Once the sound of their wingbeats faded in the distance he could hear her hurried footfalls. She was alone and something upsetting had chased her away from Gandalf's cottage. Curiosity and concern for her well being persuaded him to follow her.
She had torn a path through the trees with such abandon that the elf needed no skill to find it. When her muffled cries and stumbling steps fell silent, he realized that she had stopped. Whether weariness or the return of calming thought had ended her flight, he did not know, but he took great care to approach her without alarming her.
In a small clearing, Legolas found her sitting on the remains of a great fallen tree. She hugged her knees to her chest and stared with unfocused eyes at the ground. Whatever her thoughts, they consumed the whole of her attention. Concealed by his silence and the woods around him, he watched her. For the moment, Sally seemed to want to be alone. He waited patiently for the appropriate time to reveal his presence.
Her face reflected a myriad of emotions. One by one, they graced her features as her mind turned over each thought. Peace eluded her. But out of this confusing storm within her came a sound from happier times. With sad notes and a strained voice, Sally began to sing. "I like New York in June. How about you?"
Stepping out form the trees, the elf responded in kind. "I like a Gershwin tune. How about you?"
Sally looked up at him in wonder. The song was a duet, but she never dreamed that she would sing it with him. "Master Legolas," she called to him. The sunlight illuminated the now dry trails her tears had taken down her face.
"Hello Sally," he said in gentle greeting.
She forced a polite smile and began to explain. "My mother hated housework," she said. "To pass the time, she always sang showtunes." She looked away from him, embarrassed at being discovered in such a state. Her brow wrinkled together in frustration. Her troubles became apparent. "I've tried so hard to remember one of your songs," she said. She frowned deeply, making her effort to remember so strong it became visible. "That song that Master Gimli sang in Moria or the one you sang outside of Lothlorien or any one of the dozens of songs Mister Frodo sang but." She paused as new tears spilled down her cheeks. She had given up her search to reach them. The defeat hurt her deeply. "But all I can sing are my mother's show tunes."
The elf's features softened with sympathy. He sat down next to her, reaching for her hand to comfort her. He understood what troubled her now. "Perhaps you are trying too hard," he said.
"This was the thing he wouldn't tell me," she said hoarsely. "This is what's been wrong with me from the start." She stood suddenly, pulling her hand from his grasp. A part of her wanted to weep openly and seek solace from her old friend. Another part of her wanted to run and hide until she could make sense of herself again. The conflict brought her to a halt leaving her unsure of how to act or what to do. "Nothing about me feels right anymore," she said in quiet defeat. "I'm either remembering things that never happened to me or I . look down at myself and I just don't . fit. Who am I supposed to be?"
Legolas frowned at her description. "You speak as if you have to choose."
"How can I be both?" Sally cried plaintively.
"How can you not be?" he replied in calming tones. He stood to face her. "That is who you are. Samwise Gamgee is not just a part of you. You are Sam. Sally's life is not a separate one. It is a continuation."
Her face contorted in sorrow. She felt as if she had been used, that she was a pawn in a scheme too grand for her mind to grasp. "Am I to be a slave to this fate?" she cried. "Don't I have a choice?"
"You have always had a choice," Legolas said gently. "At the Council of Elrond, when Frodo volunteered to take the Ring to Mount Doom, what did you choose?"
Sally closed her eyes as the memory washed over her. She remembered the fear she felt for her master as his small voice place him forth, declaring him as the Ringbearer. She remembered springing up from her hiding spot unable to let him go alone. "I chose to go with him," she whispered.
"At Cirith Ungol," Legolas began, guiding her through the turmoil, "when you learned your master was alive and in the hands of the orcs, what did you choose?"
A blackness poured into her heart at the thought. Time had stopped for her then. She had tortured herself over choices made in darkness of mind and heart. One choice she had never forgiven herself for. She should never have left him. No matter the outcome, she was still wrong. What she did was not brave. It was her attempt to make things right. "I chose to save him."
Legolas' voice came to her like a beacon in the shadows. She followed it through her fears as it would lead her to the truth. "At the slopes of Mount Doom, when his feet would no longer bear him. What did you choose?"
"I chose to carry him," she replied. She had nothing left to give him then. To carry him was not a humble sacrifice. It was an act of love and devotion.
As was everything she did now.
"No one is making you go with him," he said. "Even now it is your choice."
Slowly, Sally opened her eyes. "I feel foolish," she said, almost smiling in embarrassment. She turned to Legolas. She was grateful for his wisdom. "It was right before me all along. For some reason, I fought against it."
He smiled warmly at her and took her hands within his. "It's time to stop fighting and accept who you really are."
She lifted her face to the sunlight and felt its warmth touch her skin. Throughout her journey she had not heard a voice that came from the past. It did not come from some part of her that she had denied. It was her voice. Always. Her voice. Her fears. Her memories. Her love. She was Sam. And Sam knew exactly where she was supposed to be.
She raced back to the cottage with renewed joy. She couldn't wait to see her master again. All her confusion had left her and she wondered why she ever had any doubts. She wanted desperately to tell him this, for up this point she felt all she had done was worry him. But she was alright now. She was his Sam again and they were together. At the end of all things.
She sprang through the wizard's door. "I'm here, Mister Frodo!" she cried happily. "I'm alright now."
Gandalf looked to her sadly. The fire had died leaving the cabin in darkness. He was alone. "He's gone, Sally."
TBC
Author's Note: Hey, what a long wait! You never realize how much you need ffn until it goes on the fritz. Being without your fantastic feedback really slowed me up but I have wonderful things in store you guys. I have chapter 13 already finished and it should be posted in the next couple of days. To answer Princess Artemis' question, there will be 17 chapters in all. The last three chapters will be a total angst fest. To answer Nix's question, I'm sorry but I don't have plans for Tom Bombadil to make an appearance, but hey, you never know. I could be hit with sudden inspiration before I'm done. ;)
Chapter Thirteen: "A Journey into Darkness"-Sally has some choice words for Gandalf as Frodo makes his way through Moria.
Author's note at the end.
'But I won't cry for yesterday. There's an ordinary world, somehow I have to find. And as I try to make my way to the ordinary world, I will learn to survive.'-"Ordinary World" by Duran Duran.
"Hostile Takeover"-Chapter Twelve: The Breaking of the Fellowship
The look upon Sally's face before she disappeared struck Frodo harder than any physical blow he had ever received. Fear, pain, confusion, she felt too much in one moment for her to express. No matter his intentions, he knew he had done this to her. He knew it was his fault. He took another step forward to follow her. He wanted more than anything to help, to bring order to the flood of memories that bombarded her. His was the only face she had known in this life and that.
A strong but gentle touch to his shoulder stopped him. "You should let her go," Gandalf said. His voice was barely above a whisper.
"I should explain," Frodo protested. He tried to twist himself out of the wizard's grip but he lacked the strength that his human glamour had once given him. He never regretted being small. He just had tired of everyone else being so much bigger.
Gandalf's hand had tightened but not so much in restraint as in reassurance. "She has enough to deal with without having to endure another explanation."
Reluctantly, Frodo relaxed. "You're right," he sighed. In his mind, he could picture Sally running away. She was upset but she would not go far. She would not leave. "I've pushed too much on her," he said looking up at the towering wizard. He managed a weak smile. He had to believe that she would be alright. As much as he had feared how the return of Sam's memories would affect Sally, he could not deny that he had longed for this. From the moment that he knew that this was possible, a part of him had wished for it, leaving the rest of him to feel guilty for the pain she felt because of it. "I'll give her some time."
Gandalf shook his head sadly. "No, Frodo," he said gently. "You should let her go."
Frodo felt his heart grow heavy as a lump formed in his throat. He understood what Gandalf had proposed but he didn't want to believe it. After coming so far, after struggling with the question himself, he could not part with her. Now that the thought came to him again, he didn't want to. "But." he said in a voice thick with emotion, "she's Sam."
The wizard put his great arms around his friend. As he rested his hand on Frodo's head he could feel the effort the hobbit expelled to hold back his tears. "I know, Frodo, I know," he said bending over him. His larger frame almost seemed to shelter him. "You have suffered great loneliness without him."
Of all of his existence, the accumulated experiences of centuries, one memory tormented him above all others. The enormity of his pain had nearly crushed him. Nothing could compare to losing Sam. Only the joy of meeting Sally came close. Before he realized it, he had begun to weep, sobbing like a small child holding fast to his father's knee. "I missed him so, Gandalf," he choked. "I never wanted."
The rest of his words became lost in his tears.
He still grieved. The loss was ever fresh in his mind, like a recurring nightmare that plagued him day and night. Sam's death stood almost as a monument in time. When he died, Frodo felt the goodness within himself die along with him. What remained of Frodo seemed only mere shadow, like a wraith, a pale, doomed reflection of the hobbit he had been.
"You still must destroy the Ring," Gandalf said, reminding him of his purpose. He still held tightly to him not knowing if he provided any comfort in his presence or touch. He wanted his support to mean something to him now. No matter how painful his guidance must be, he would not fail him again. "It knows what you plan to do."
"I know," Frodo sobbed.
"If it can't influence you to change your mind, it will try to leave you," the wizard said in careful warning.
"I know," he repeated. His tears had begun to subside. His voice became stronger. His weakness and fear of being alone began to yield to the truth in Gandalf's words. His emotion had clouded him to the bigger picture. He had forgotten the danger was not only his.
Gandalf knelt down to look Frodo in the face. "You must continue alone," he said finally.
Frodo met his eyes unwillingly and sniffled without shame. What shame could he have in sadness he felt so deeply? He thought of his road ahead and despair placed its weight upon his heart. Sally had given him a hope he thought only lived in faint memories. Alone, he would have the cold comfort of purpose to drive him to his goal. But as much as the separation would hurt him he could not bear the thought of what it would do to her. He had tried to leave her before and found he couldn't. "Sally will not understand," he said sadly, "We've already come so far."
"It's not like before," Gandalf said. "Sam is human now, with all the strengths and frailties that come with it. The Ring will seek her out and she will not be able to resist it."
Frodo shut his eyes and bent his head in shame. The Ring. Anything that had any meaning in his life revolved around the Ring. It had damned him. It had saved him. It had taken Sam from him. It had brought Sally to him. Now because of it he would have to leave her. He remembered Amon Hen and when he tried to leave the fellowship. He remembered Boromir's madness. Did his fate await Sally?
With a human heart and the darkness of the world tainting her form, Sam no longer was the true company he had been before. Would the Ring drive Sam to betray his master? Frodo had to stop being selfish. He was far too old to desire such companionship over the fate of the world. Sally would have to understand. He was leaving her for her own sake.
* * *
Piper sat on the sidewalk wiping at her eyes with the palms of her hands. She looked up at the buildings and people that surrounded her with a purity of soul that astounded her. Amidst the confusion from the lifetime of old memories she found lost things that had eluded her in this life. Peregrin Took remembered well the shining towers of Minas Tirith.the White City. New York City dwarfed the memory like a colossus, with skyscrapers that looked down upon the clouds. Beautiful and terrible at the same time. Yet they seemed dirty, dark.tainted.
She could see the result of man's bravado towards evil. The world had lost its innocence, and sadly so had she. She could not help but wonder if humanity would have made this choice to face the darkness if they had known what would become of them? She knew that she would not.he would not. Did that make her any less brave?
That thought had sobered her enough to quell the last of her tears. Her hands had wet, black smears of lost mascara streaked across them. She stared at them, mesmerized by what had become of her, who she was once and who she was now and what had brought all of this to be. She could sit on that concrete for months and still the memories would not fall into place fittingly.
But the world would not wait for her to adjust. Her cell phone began to ring cheerfully, ignorant to the fact that its owner neither wanted music nor cheer. She opened her receiver automatically and said, "Hello?"
At first she heard only silence, just random background noise but a voice finally came through just as hesitant, just as lost as she felt. "Pip?"
Merrick. All of Piper's tears came back in a rush, a flood that only allowed her to answer in sobs. Merry.
Merrick's voice faltered. Adrift in a sea of recovered memory, he had shed his own tears. His world, which never fully made sense, had just taken a detour into madness. He reached out to the only person he knew would understand. "Something." he began haltingly. He almost told her that something was wrong but that didn't quite describe what he felt. "Something's happened to me."
"It's real!" Piper cried in declaration. His experience only confirmed the actuality of her own. "It's not a dream." She could feel his doubt. He had to know who she was. He had to know who he was. He had to realize that they were once part of something sacred. A thought came to her suddenly, colliding her past and present lives in a way that chilled her. An image presented itself to her, offering a glimmer of explanation. She couldn't believe she'd almost forgotten. Her voice shook. "I saw him," she said quietly. "He's alive. I saw him." She closed her eyes, savoring the memory of her encounter. She could almost remember the feel of his arms around her, hugging her like old friends. He knew. She realized it now. He knew even when she was blissfully ignorant.
Merrick continued to struggle, trying to put the pieces together as quickly as she. "Saw who?" he asked hesitantly through the phone.
"Frodo."
He knew the answer before she said it. It had simply become a pill too thick to swallow. Piper could almost see Merrick shaking his head in denial. He couldn't let go. He couldn't believe. "You.you couldn't have," he stammered. "It's not possible."
"I saw him," Piper insisted. The image had burned itself into her mind and her heart, a precious treasure that she would keep forever. Would she ever she him again now that she knew everything? "He and Sally drove away in my car."
"Sally." Merrick breathed. The thought trailed into silence. The name was enough.
"Oh my God," Piper gasped, "Sam."
Her life finally made sense. All those whom she loved, she had loved and cherished before. They had come back to her. They had come back together. No more searching. She knew exactly who she was. "This is really happening," she said. "You know that, don't you?"
"I know. I know," he sighed. He could no longer deny it. He had held his fate at a distance, keeping it always out of reach of what he had believed was reality, away from who he thought he was supposed to be.
"Why did this happen?" Piper asked. An edge of innocence had come to her voice. Old roles had begun to return to them. The younger hobbit looked to his older cousin for the answers his wisdom would grant him. "Why are we together? Why now?"
"It's got to be Frodo," Merrick answered. The words sounded strange but felt right as he said them. "Frodo and the Ring."
"You think Frodo brought us back?" she asked.
"No," he replied gravely. Not the Frodo they remembered. The act seemed uncharacteristically selfish. Something more divine must have its hand in this. He thought of his dream. Some things began to make sense. Others knew them before they knew themselves. "But we're here because of him."
Piper understood the direction of Merrick's thoughts. She saw their ultimate conclusion. "He's going to destroy it," she whispered. She closed her eyes with the realization, feeling a mixture of fear and relief over her old friend's actions. "He's finally going to destroy it."
"And Sam will be with him," Merrick added, "just like before."
"While we're left behind to fight his other battles," she agreed. The parallels between the past and present quests were painfully real. She clutched her cell phone tightly unable to express out loud the comfort she felt by knowing that she was not alone in this.
Merrick thought the same. He wanted to see her smiling face, feel the reassuring tug on his arm. He knew that with her, he wouldn't feel so afraid. Perhaps, he could still change his mind. "Where are you?" he asked.
Piper smiled sheepishly. She could have told him she was in any of her haunts in Chicago but after the truths they already shared, lying not longer seemed acceptable. "Manhattan," she admitted.
"Piper!" Merrick shouted into the phone. "Are you following me?"
"What did you expect me to do?" she cried. "Sit on your couch in Chicago? With what we know now, how can you leave me behind?"
"I just wanted you safe," he said, knowing that was only a pitiful excuse. He wanted her with him now. Their lives were intertwined just as much as Frodo's was with Sam. A danger to one was a danger they all shared.
"You can't fight fate, cousin," Piper said. "We're here for a reason."
"I suppose I should tell you where I'm going," he replied.
"Why?" she said, laughing. "Fate got me this far. I trust it to bring me the rest of the way."
* * *
A startled group of migrating birds first alerted Legolas to Sally's passing. Once the sound of their wingbeats faded in the distance he could hear her hurried footfalls. She was alone and something upsetting had chased her away from Gandalf's cottage. Curiosity and concern for her well being persuaded him to follow her.
She had torn a path through the trees with such abandon that the elf needed no skill to find it. When her muffled cries and stumbling steps fell silent, he realized that she had stopped. Whether weariness or the return of calming thought had ended her flight, he did not know, but he took great care to approach her without alarming her.
In a small clearing, Legolas found her sitting on the remains of a great fallen tree. She hugged her knees to her chest and stared with unfocused eyes at the ground. Whatever her thoughts, they consumed the whole of her attention. Concealed by his silence and the woods around him, he watched her. For the moment, Sally seemed to want to be alone. He waited patiently for the appropriate time to reveal his presence.
Her face reflected a myriad of emotions. One by one, they graced her features as her mind turned over each thought. Peace eluded her. But out of this confusing storm within her came a sound from happier times. With sad notes and a strained voice, Sally began to sing. "I like New York in June. How about you?"
Stepping out form the trees, the elf responded in kind. "I like a Gershwin tune. How about you?"
Sally looked up at him in wonder. The song was a duet, but she never dreamed that she would sing it with him. "Master Legolas," she called to him. The sunlight illuminated the now dry trails her tears had taken down her face.
"Hello Sally," he said in gentle greeting.
She forced a polite smile and began to explain. "My mother hated housework," she said. "To pass the time, she always sang showtunes." She looked away from him, embarrassed at being discovered in such a state. Her brow wrinkled together in frustration. Her troubles became apparent. "I've tried so hard to remember one of your songs," she said. She frowned deeply, making her effort to remember so strong it became visible. "That song that Master Gimli sang in Moria or the one you sang outside of Lothlorien or any one of the dozens of songs Mister Frodo sang but." She paused as new tears spilled down her cheeks. She had given up her search to reach them. The defeat hurt her deeply. "But all I can sing are my mother's show tunes."
The elf's features softened with sympathy. He sat down next to her, reaching for her hand to comfort her. He understood what troubled her now. "Perhaps you are trying too hard," he said.
"This was the thing he wouldn't tell me," she said hoarsely. "This is what's been wrong with me from the start." She stood suddenly, pulling her hand from his grasp. A part of her wanted to weep openly and seek solace from her old friend. Another part of her wanted to run and hide until she could make sense of herself again. The conflict brought her to a halt leaving her unsure of how to act or what to do. "Nothing about me feels right anymore," she said in quiet defeat. "I'm either remembering things that never happened to me or I . look down at myself and I just don't . fit. Who am I supposed to be?"
Legolas frowned at her description. "You speak as if you have to choose."
"How can I be both?" Sally cried plaintively.
"How can you not be?" he replied in calming tones. He stood to face her. "That is who you are. Samwise Gamgee is not just a part of you. You are Sam. Sally's life is not a separate one. It is a continuation."
Her face contorted in sorrow. She felt as if she had been used, that she was a pawn in a scheme too grand for her mind to grasp. "Am I to be a slave to this fate?" she cried. "Don't I have a choice?"
"You have always had a choice," Legolas said gently. "At the Council of Elrond, when Frodo volunteered to take the Ring to Mount Doom, what did you choose?"
Sally closed her eyes as the memory washed over her. She remembered the fear she felt for her master as his small voice place him forth, declaring him as the Ringbearer. She remembered springing up from her hiding spot unable to let him go alone. "I chose to go with him," she whispered.
"At Cirith Ungol," Legolas began, guiding her through the turmoil, "when you learned your master was alive and in the hands of the orcs, what did you choose?"
A blackness poured into her heart at the thought. Time had stopped for her then. She had tortured herself over choices made in darkness of mind and heart. One choice she had never forgiven herself for. She should never have left him. No matter the outcome, she was still wrong. What she did was not brave. It was her attempt to make things right. "I chose to save him."
Legolas' voice came to her like a beacon in the shadows. She followed it through her fears as it would lead her to the truth. "At the slopes of Mount Doom, when his feet would no longer bear him. What did you choose?"
"I chose to carry him," she replied. She had nothing left to give him then. To carry him was not a humble sacrifice. It was an act of love and devotion.
As was everything she did now.
"No one is making you go with him," he said. "Even now it is your choice."
Slowly, Sally opened her eyes. "I feel foolish," she said, almost smiling in embarrassment. She turned to Legolas. She was grateful for his wisdom. "It was right before me all along. For some reason, I fought against it."
He smiled warmly at her and took her hands within his. "It's time to stop fighting and accept who you really are."
She lifted her face to the sunlight and felt its warmth touch her skin. Throughout her journey she had not heard a voice that came from the past. It did not come from some part of her that she had denied. It was her voice. Always. Her voice. Her fears. Her memories. Her love. She was Sam. And Sam knew exactly where she was supposed to be.
She raced back to the cottage with renewed joy. She couldn't wait to see her master again. All her confusion had left her and she wondered why she ever had any doubts. She wanted desperately to tell him this, for up this point she felt all she had done was worry him. But she was alright now. She was his Sam again and they were together. At the end of all things.
She sprang through the wizard's door. "I'm here, Mister Frodo!" she cried happily. "I'm alright now."
Gandalf looked to her sadly. The fire had died leaving the cabin in darkness. He was alone. "He's gone, Sally."
TBC
Author's Note: Hey, what a long wait! You never realize how much you need ffn until it goes on the fritz. Being without your fantastic feedback really slowed me up but I have wonderful things in store you guys. I have chapter 13 already finished and it should be posted in the next couple of days. To answer Princess Artemis' question, there will be 17 chapters in all. The last three chapters will be a total angst fest. To answer Nix's question, I'm sorry but I don't have plans for Tom Bombadil to make an appearance, but hey, you never know. I could be hit with sudden inspiration before I'm done. ;)
Chapter Thirteen: "A Journey into Darkness"-Sally has some choice words for Gandalf as Frodo makes his way through Moria.