Harm stepped off the plane and into the waiting area of the terminal. He
frowned as he scanned the crowd. There was not sign of Mac. He checked
his watch, 'She should be here by now.' After a few minutes the crowd
dispersed and Harm spotted her.
She was sitting in chair by the windows, resting her head on her fist. Harm smiled, she was asleep. He walked over in front of her and shucked off his duffel. He stood for a moment, just watching her. She looked exhausted, and Harm shook his head slightly. 'She's been through hell.' He contemplated for a moment kneeling in front of her, but the ache in his legs told him that wasn't a wise idea. Silently he sat down next to her and put his arm around her shoulders.
She woke with a start, and he smiled down at her. "Hey."
"Hey." Mac replied, sitting upright and rubbing her eyes. "How long have you been here?"
"I just got in."
She shrugged, "sorry I guess I was more tired than I thought."
"No problem." Harm said, standing up and offering his hand to her.
Mac smiled, and accepted it. Standing up, she hesitated and then pulled him close to her. "I'm so glad you're back," she whispered.
Harm raised his eyebrows in surprise, and held her close to him. Comforting her. "So am I," he replied softly. Stepping back he picked up his duffel. "Let's get out of here."
Mac nodded, and they began to walk through the airport. "How was the flight?" Mac asked, trying to keep things light.
"It was ok." Harm shrugged. "Anything interesting happen while I was gone?"
"Not really." Mac replied, with a yawn.
Harm furrowed his brow. "You know Mac, you look like you haven't slept in years. You ok?"
Mac stopped and turned to him, "I'm just worn out. I'm ok." She answered trying to sound convincing. Harm nodded.
They made their way to the car without further comment.
Harm looked over at Mac from the passenger seat. She looked detached, numb. He reached over and tentatively took her hand. "Everything's going to be ok." He stated softly.
Mac turned her head, gave a small nod, and attempted a smile. Harm held onto her hand until she had to downshift, and stop at a light.
"You know Mac, we don't have to talk tonight. You need to get some rest. We can do this later."
Mac shot him a look, and he slightly leaned back away from her. Back peddling a little he said, "or on second thought I guess we can do this now." His eyebrows rose slightly in question, but Mac made no verbal response.
Harm reached over and took her hand once more, giving it a comforting squeeze. She looked so fragile. He really couldn't blame her for being on guard. She had been bowled over by the events of the last few weeks. Their kiss on the porch, his leaving for his Quals and then going down in the drink, Mic walking out on her, the list went on. And she was doing it all without any support. Harm shook his head slightly, as he silently vowed to be there for her, come what may.
Mac pulled up in front of her building and picked up Harm's duffel from the trunk. Harm went to protest, but thought better of it. 'I'm perfectly capable.' He heard her voice tell him in his head, and he couldn't hold back a chuckle.
Mac eyed him, "what's so funny?" She asked amiably.
"Oh nothing." He answered. "Thanks for carrying my duffel."
Mac shot him a look, "I'm perfectly capable Harm!"
With that Harm burst out laughing, and Mac's glare twitched, threatening to break. "You certainly are." He said, still chuckling. Mac's glare broke into a smile. Harm smiled back and draped his arm loosely around her shoulders.
"Do you want anything to drink?" Mac asked as they walked into the apartment and settled in.
"Sure, I'll just have some water."
"Okay." Mac replied, taking her time getting his water, and shedding her shoes. Harm could tell she was stalling. Everything about her manner screamed insecurity. He looked around and saw the only evidence that Mic Brumby had ever been there, a box with miscellaneous odds and ends in it. Things he had left behind. Harm stiffened as he was struck with that same strange emotion, anger mixed with relief.
Mac turned and followed the direction of his gaze. Wordlessly she walked over, grabbed the box and threw it in the closet. She slammed the closet door with finality, and brushed her hands together. She was finished with Mic Brumby. The anger had set in. Harm saw her mentally shove her sleeves up and prepare. The Marine in her, was taking her anger, and turning it into courage.
"So." Mac said in full, confident voice. "You wanted to talk."
"Yes." Harm replied matching her tone.
"Okay. Then let's talk."
"Okay." Harm said a little hesitantly, and then softened. Reaching out to take her hand, he said, "I'm sorry I had to leave like that. I wanted to be here for you so much."
Mac smiled slightly, and nodded. "Well, I survived." She sighed, "I always do."
"Yes you do. But this time you don't have to do it alone."
Mac released his hand and stepped back. "Why now Harm?"
"Why now?"
"Yeah, why are we having this conversation now and not on the ferry? What is different about this moment in comparison to that one?"
Harm straightened, "on the ferry I never knew what it would be like to lose you. I just wanted more time, I honestly didn't think asking for it would drive you away." He paused and looked her in the eye. "By the time I realized the consequences it was too late to take it all back."
"Did you want to take it back?"
"Yes. And I find now, that I can answer your question honestly. Eternity, is NOT how long we're going to wait."
"This doesn't have to be complicated Harm."
Harm sighed, "no Mac it doesn't. But it may get that way from time to time. Either way, you were right, I was afraid of letting go."
"You're not still afraid?" She asked.
"I am." Harm admitted, and then pinned her with a frank expression. "But I'm letting go anyway."
Mac stilled, and her eyes took on an expression of relief. She knew his intentions before he left. But 3 days of nothing but your own thoughts can build on a lot of doubts and insecurities.
The ringing of the phone interrupted Mac's response. Reluctantly she picked it up, "Hello." She said into the receiver. Hoping against hope it wasn't Mic. She grimaced, as she heard Renee's voice. "Yes, he's right here." She said, as she handed Harm the phone, she mouthed 'Renee'.
"Hello."
*Harm, how long ago did you get in?*
He looked at his watch. "About and hour ago."
*You said you would call me when you landed.*
"I know I'm sorry about that. I'm just really tired and _"
*_preoccupied with Mac. Are you sleeping there tonight too Harm?*
"Renee'." Harm began, frustrated. "It's not like that."
*You haven't even been home yet have you? I knew that's the first place you'd go.*
"No I haven't. But that's irrelevant. Mac is my best friend and she's hurting right now. Am I just supposed to ignore that?"
*What about me, I'm hurting too. *
"I went to the funeral. I supported you_"
* You were there with me, but I could tell your mind was on her. You didn't even remember me when you woke up in the hospital. *
"Now that's not fair Renee', I was fighting for my life! I'm sorry I couldn't remember every detail when I woke up."
*You remembered everything about Mac! *
"That's irrelevant and it was out of my control!"
* You wouldn't even sleep in the same bed with me! *
"Renee'_" Harm shifted uncomfortably, and looked at Mac. "I already explained to you that we couldn't sleep together. I have injuries__"
* Harm, that is a load of shit and you know it! You just didn't want me because I wasn't Mac! You couldn't even kiss me without saying her name! *
"That only happened once!" Mac's eyes widened as registered what Renee' had just screamed at Harm. Harm, who had been holding the phone out from his ear in an effort to salvage his ear drums, just looked at her, bewildered, and tried to calm down. "Listen Renee', I think you should calm down. You've been under a lot so stress and__" Harm heard Renee' sniffle into the phone.
* The stress started way before my dad died Harm! I've had enough of hoping that you could forget about her. I'm not going to do it anymore. *
Harm took a deep breath. "So what are you saying?"
* I'm finished Harm. It's over. *
"Ok, if that's what you want." Harm said, feeling guilty for his lack of sadness.
* Goodbye Harm. *
"Goodbye Renee'." Harm clicked off the phone and stared at it for a moment before he set it down on the table.
"It's over?" Mac asked with a sympathetic look.
"It's over." Harm stated with a look of relief. And raised his eyes to meet hers.
TBC Good? Bad? Let me know.
She was sitting in chair by the windows, resting her head on her fist. Harm smiled, she was asleep. He walked over in front of her and shucked off his duffel. He stood for a moment, just watching her. She looked exhausted, and Harm shook his head slightly. 'She's been through hell.' He contemplated for a moment kneeling in front of her, but the ache in his legs told him that wasn't a wise idea. Silently he sat down next to her and put his arm around her shoulders.
She woke with a start, and he smiled down at her. "Hey."
"Hey." Mac replied, sitting upright and rubbing her eyes. "How long have you been here?"
"I just got in."
She shrugged, "sorry I guess I was more tired than I thought."
"No problem." Harm said, standing up and offering his hand to her.
Mac smiled, and accepted it. Standing up, she hesitated and then pulled him close to her. "I'm so glad you're back," she whispered.
Harm raised his eyebrows in surprise, and held her close to him. Comforting her. "So am I," he replied softly. Stepping back he picked up his duffel. "Let's get out of here."
Mac nodded, and they began to walk through the airport. "How was the flight?" Mac asked, trying to keep things light.
"It was ok." Harm shrugged. "Anything interesting happen while I was gone?"
"Not really." Mac replied, with a yawn.
Harm furrowed his brow. "You know Mac, you look like you haven't slept in years. You ok?"
Mac stopped and turned to him, "I'm just worn out. I'm ok." She answered trying to sound convincing. Harm nodded.
They made their way to the car without further comment.
Harm looked over at Mac from the passenger seat. She looked detached, numb. He reached over and tentatively took her hand. "Everything's going to be ok." He stated softly.
Mac turned her head, gave a small nod, and attempted a smile. Harm held onto her hand until she had to downshift, and stop at a light.
"You know Mac, we don't have to talk tonight. You need to get some rest. We can do this later."
Mac shot him a look, and he slightly leaned back away from her. Back peddling a little he said, "or on second thought I guess we can do this now." His eyebrows rose slightly in question, but Mac made no verbal response.
Harm reached over and took her hand once more, giving it a comforting squeeze. She looked so fragile. He really couldn't blame her for being on guard. She had been bowled over by the events of the last few weeks. Their kiss on the porch, his leaving for his Quals and then going down in the drink, Mic walking out on her, the list went on. And she was doing it all without any support. Harm shook his head slightly, as he silently vowed to be there for her, come what may.
Mac pulled up in front of her building and picked up Harm's duffel from the trunk. Harm went to protest, but thought better of it. 'I'm perfectly capable.' He heard her voice tell him in his head, and he couldn't hold back a chuckle.
Mac eyed him, "what's so funny?" She asked amiably.
"Oh nothing." He answered. "Thanks for carrying my duffel."
Mac shot him a look, "I'm perfectly capable Harm!"
With that Harm burst out laughing, and Mac's glare twitched, threatening to break. "You certainly are." He said, still chuckling. Mac's glare broke into a smile. Harm smiled back and draped his arm loosely around her shoulders.
"Do you want anything to drink?" Mac asked as they walked into the apartment and settled in.
"Sure, I'll just have some water."
"Okay." Mac replied, taking her time getting his water, and shedding her shoes. Harm could tell she was stalling. Everything about her manner screamed insecurity. He looked around and saw the only evidence that Mic Brumby had ever been there, a box with miscellaneous odds and ends in it. Things he had left behind. Harm stiffened as he was struck with that same strange emotion, anger mixed with relief.
Mac turned and followed the direction of his gaze. Wordlessly she walked over, grabbed the box and threw it in the closet. She slammed the closet door with finality, and brushed her hands together. She was finished with Mic Brumby. The anger had set in. Harm saw her mentally shove her sleeves up and prepare. The Marine in her, was taking her anger, and turning it into courage.
"So." Mac said in full, confident voice. "You wanted to talk."
"Yes." Harm replied matching her tone.
"Okay. Then let's talk."
"Okay." Harm said a little hesitantly, and then softened. Reaching out to take her hand, he said, "I'm sorry I had to leave like that. I wanted to be here for you so much."
Mac smiled slightly, and nodded. "Well, I survived." She sighed, "I always do."
"Yes you do. But this time you don't have to do it alone."
Mac released his hand and stepped back. "Why now Harm?"
"Why now?"
"Yeah, why are we having this conversation now and not on the ferry? What is different about this moment in comparison to that one?"
Harm straightened, "on the ferry I never knew what it would be like to lose you. I just wanted more time, I honestly didn't think asking for it would drive you away." He paused and looked her in the eye. "By the time I realized the consequences it was too late to take it all back."
"Did you want to take it back?"
"Yes. And I find now, that I can answer your question honestly. Eternity, is NOT how long we're going to wait."
"This doesn't have to be complicated Harm."
Harm sighed, "no Mac it doesn't. But it may get that way from time to time. Either way, you were right, I was afraid of letting go."
"You're not still afraid?" She asked.
"I am." Harm admitted, and then pinned her with a frank expression. "But I'm letting go anyway."
Mac stilled, and her eyes took on an expression of relief. She knew his intentions before he left. But 3 days of nothing but your own thoughts can build on a lot of doubts and insecurities.
The ringing of the phone interrupted Mac's response. Reluctantly she picked it up, "Hello." She said into the receiver. Hoping against hope it wasn't Mic. She grimaced, as she heard Renee's voice. "Yes, he's right here." She said, as she handed Harm the phone, she mouthed 'Renee'.
"Hello."
*Harm, how long ago did you get in?*
He looked at his watch. "About and hour ago."
*You said you would call me when you landed.*
"I know I'm sorry about that. I'm just really tired and _"
*_preoccupied with Mac. Are you sleeping there tonight too Harm?*
"Renee'." Harm began, frustrated. "It's not like that."
*You haven't even been home yet have you? I knew that's the first place you'd go.*
"No I haven't. But that's irrelevant. Mac is my best friend and she's hurting right now. Am I just supposed to ignore that?"
*What about me, I'm hurting too. *
"I went to the funeral. I supported you_"
* You were there with me, but I could tell your mind was on her. You didn't even remember me when you woke up in the hospital. *
"Now that's not fair Renee', I was fighting for my life! I'm sorry I couldn't remember every detail when I woke up."
*You remembered everything about Mac! *
"That's irrelevant and it was out of my control!"
* You wouldn't even sleep in the same bed with me! *
"Renee'_" Harm shifted uncomfortably, and looked at Mac. "I already explained to you that we couldn't sleep together. I have injuries__"
* Harm, that is a load of shit and you know it! You just didn't want me because I wasn't Mac! You couldn't even kiss me without saying her name! *
"That only happened once!" Mac's eyes widened as registered what Renee' had just screamed at Harm. Harm, who had been holding the phone out from his ear in an effort to salvage his ear drums, just looked at her, bewildered, and tried to calm down. "Listen Renee', I think you should calm down. You've been under a lot so stress and__" Harm heard Renee' sniffle into the phone.
* The stress started way before my dad died Harm! I've had enough of hoping that you could forget about her. I'm not going to do it anymore. *
Harm took a deep breath. "So what are you saying?"
* I'm finished Harm. It's over. *
"Ok, if that's what you want." Harm said, feeling guilty for his lack of sadness.
* Goodbye Harm. *
"Goodbye Renee'." Harm clicked off the phone and stared at it for a moment before he set it down on the table.
"It's over?" Mac asked with a sympathetic look.
"It's over." Harm stated with a look of relief. And raised his eyes to meet hers.
TBC Good? Bad? Let me know.