Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters.
A/N: Hey. This is a totally new thing for me. I used to write RPF (real people fanfiction to be more specific - music groups) . But now that that is off the site, I wanted to try something new. I really like the Gilmore Girls and I hope that I can bring justice to the characters and the show. This is my first GG fic and it will be a chapter story. I'm not going to be one of those people who say "10 reviews or I won't continue" but reviews would be great – I can even take constructive criticism…sometimes. ;)
To Be
Why had she done it?
Why had she kissed him?
Even after six weeks the questions wouldn't escape her. And thoughts of him wouldn't leave her mind. She was going home in one day and she still didn't know how she was going to face him.
It didn't take a brain scientist to figure out that she cared for him. But there was Dean. And she loved him. She did. Didn't she?
It was all so confusing and frustrating. She didn't want or need all these complications in her life. Things had been so much easier before Jess.
…
"Mom, please get off me." Rory said trying to catch her breath as her mother squeezed her tightly.
"Nuh uh. I'm going to hold you and squeeze you and never let you go."
Rory laughed as Lorelai, her arms still wrapped around her, made her way to the house.
"So, tell me everything." Lorelai said finally letting her go to unlock the door.
"You know everything. I called you everyday."
Lorelai waved her hands in front of her. "I don't believe any of that, missy. Tell me the good stuff. You know – the drunken carousing with Paris, both of you causing all kinds of ruckus with men named Bud and Romeo."
Rory paused for a minute. "Oh right. Romeo. Now there was a man." She nodded seriously before looking around. "I'm so glad to be home. I missed everything so much."
Lorelai gave her daughter a brief squeeze before letting go. "Not as much as everything missed you, babe. I don't know what I'm going to do when you go off to school. I'll die. I'll surely die. I just know it, Rhett!" She said the last part in a drawling southern accent and pretended to swoon.
Rory snickered. "Crazy woman."
"Why thank you!"
"Ok, so I'm going to go unpack and then why don't we do something wild and crazy."
"Oooh. Now we're talking. What should we do? Spring a heist at midnight? Sneak into Luke's and steal all his coffee? Oh. Oh. Smack your dad with my five-inch stilettos? Oh I like that last one."
Rory frowned. "Hey, how are you? Seriously."
Lorelai shook her head. "I don't know. It still...It still hurts but it's all become kind of – I don't know. Chris and I have never been at the same place at the same time in our lives. I don't think we'll ever be. I think I'm just starting to accept that."
"I'm still mad at him."
"I know. But Ror, he's your dad and even with all this remember that he loves you. And just because I'm not ready to let him back into my life doesn't mean that you shouldn't."
"I'm not ready for that. Anyway, I'll go unpack and when I'm done we will…?"
"Go to Ming's for coffee."
"Ming's? Why not Luke's? Wait – are you still fighting with Luke?"
"Uh…fighting is such a strong word. I prefer – not communicating with each other because of personal differences."
"Mom…"
Lorelai sighed. "Rory, I've tried. I have. I've apologized to him like a million times. But he won't hear any of it. He's being so unfair."
"Ok that's it. We're going to Luke's."
"No, Rory."
"Shut up. We're going and that's final. I'm going to go unpack my bags now and you better be ready when I finish. And that's final. No ifs, ands or buts about it." She nodded her head briskly at her mother before heading back to the car to get her suitcase out.
Lorelai shook her head but smiled. It was good to have Rory home.
…
"Mom, stop peering through the window and let's go inside." Rory said before pulling Lorelai by the arm and dragging her into Luke's.
They made their way to their usual table and sat down. Rory looked around inconspicuously for Jess, but he wasn't around. She wondered how her mom had reacted to him coming back. She wasn't going to bring it up though. Bringing up Jess always led up to some argument and she really wasn't in the mood to defend him or herself.
As soon as Luke came up to their table, Rory could feel the sudden tenseness of the air around them.
"Hey Luke!"
"Rory. How was Washington?"
"Pretty good. Yep." Rory nodded and looked at her mom.
Lorelai wasn't looking at either of them.
Rory glared at her mother's bent head before turning back to Luke. "Can we get two cups of coffee, please?"
"No problem." He turned and walked away.
Rory slapped her on the arm.
"Ow! All this violence. Why?"
"Because you're being stupid. Talk to him. I don't want to lose him as a friend. Do you?"
Lorelai sighed and shook her head before getting up and walking to the counter where Luke was taking money for a bill. When the customer left she approached him.
"Luke—"
"I'll bring over the coffee now."
"No, that's not why I came over. Look, I don't want it to be like this. You're way too important a person in my life. I'm sorry, ok. I'm so sorry. I was mad and upset and I took it out on you and I shouldn't have."
She continued as Luke looked at her not saying anything just listening. "I've had a bad few weeks. And the worst part about it is that I couldn't come over here and talk to you. I miss you, Luke. I don't want to lose you."
Luke looked at her seriously before nodding politely and turning away. Lorelai gritted her teeth in annoyance before stomping back over to the table. "He's unbelievable. Un.Be.Lievable. I practically lay my heart out there and then he skewers it, chops it up, adds tofu and serves it to the dogs. Bastard."
Rory having witnessed the whole thing didn't know what to say. That had been pretty horrible of Luke. Her mom had really put everything out there and he hadn't even responded.
Luke came over with the pot of coffee and two mugs. "I don't know why I continue to enable your addiction." He set the cups on the table and poured the coffee.
Lorelai looked at Rory and Rory shrugged in confusion.
"Umm thanks." Lorelai said, bewildered by the sudden change in his disposition.
"Yeah, yeah. Just don't come crying to me when you're dead at the age of thirty five."
"Ah but what a way to go."
Luke smiled at her for the first time in weeks and was about to walk away before he turned back. "And Lorelai…I uh…I missed you too." He briskly turned away and headed back to the counter.
Lorelai grinned at Rory and Rory grinned back.
It was going to be ok.