Digimon Divided
Interlude 00: Bedbugs and Card Slash
By Coquelicot (coquelicot@japan.com)
Written 11/11/2002-11/13/2002
NOTE: Consider something like a Side Story. Fun-fun! Fufufufufu… I'm very happy right now, I got this started… ^_^;
Arena Terminal (Because that's just a cool enough name for it…)KOHAKU: Regardless of Coquelicot's wishes, the contestants did NOT have a good night. Well, some of them did. How do we know? Well, I, uh… yea, I took the liberty of implanting hidden cameras in each room in case a guy was there… Ehehehe… But, in any case, let's get on with this little show!
Room 1Taichi stared at Koushirou with bloodshot eyes. More specifically, he stared at Koushirou's computer screen, the light keeping him from getting the sleep he needed.
TAICHI: Oi, can't you get to sleep?
KOUSHIROU: Why? If they're an evil organization, then we should find out all we can about them, right? It may be useful for when they have to be defeated.
TAICHI: But NOW?!?!
KOUSHIROU: What better time than when they're sleeping and won't suspect it?
TAICHI: ::sigh:: Well, can't you dim that screen, at least?
KOUSHIROU: Then I wouldn't be able to see it. But I'm done researching. (shuts off computer) Up for a little espionage, Taichi?
TAICHI: Argh!!! No! I just want to sleep!
KOUSHIROU: Suit yourself. (turns on lights and goes through the closet) Where are the black clothes here?
TAICHI: Dammit. (covers head with pillow and blankets) ARRRGH… still… see… light… (gets out of bed and goes over to Koushirou, bleary-eyed)
KOUSHIROU: (sees Taichi) Ah, so you're going to help me with this?
TAICHI: _;; No. I'm going to get you to sleep.
KOUSHIROU: Eh? (confused)
Taichi took the opportunity to knock his forehead against Koushirou's head. It worked like a charm. Koushirou dropped down to the floor, unconscious. Grinning weakly (and evilly), Taichi dragged the body to the empty bed and tied him to the bed using the bed sheets.
TAICHI: (looks at time) Man, 2:15 already? (groans and goes to bed and sleeps, a smile on his face)
About two hours later…
KOUSHIROU: Eh? What am I doing here? (struggles against the sheet ropes tying him down and fails to get out) Dammit…
Room 2Quite unlike what you might expect, given their relationship, Sora and Yamato were sleeping separately. Sora sleeping beautifully on the large, soft, queen-sized bed, and Yamato, twisting and turning quite uncomfortably on the couch.
YAMATO: I hate being in love.
SORA: Mm… Goose down…
YAMATO: ………. I'm an idiot.
And so the night went on, with Yamato cursing himself for being so chivalrous as to give Sora the bed, and not sleeping with her, with Sora's subconscious comments torturing him further…
Room 3Jyou and Mimi's night got on relatively well. In short, they both fell asleep.
Room 4While Daisuke happily snored away, Takeru suffered.
TAKERU: (stares at the ceiling with bloodshot eyes)……And Nii-san thought he couldn't stand Jun… Her little brother's worse. O_O; How does anyone sleep with that loud snoring?
DAISUKE: ::snort::
TAKERU: -_____-;;
Room 5Like Jyou and Mimi, Hikari and Iori fell asleep as well.
KOHAKU: Is this a symbolic thing? I mean Hikari and Mimi are both pinkish (well, they wear pink), and Iori and Jyou share Faith/Reliability. Makes you wonder…
Room 6However, unlike their Jogress partners, Ken and Miyako were not asleep. The unfortunate Ken had to deal with Miyako trying to act out on her Digimental – the Digimental of Love…
KEN: (cowering against the wall) Look, can't we just get to sleep?
MIYAKO: (places hands on her hips) What? What fun is it being boyfriend and girlfriend if we don't make out? Now come over here!
KEN: I'm only in 6th grade… You're traumatizing me!
MIYAKO: Oh, shut up! You were already traumatized once and got through it, so get through it this time too!
KEN: … (whimpers)
MIYAKO: (comes closer. Her shadow on the wall grows longer, almost menacingly so)
KEN: (eyes wide) Iyaa!!!
Apparently, at this moment, Ken's body covers the hidden camera (his arm smashing into it), eliciting a groan from Kohaku and leaving us without ever knowing the outcome… for now.
KOHAKU: Tomorrow night, dammit. I need another camera installed there. _
Room 7Shaochung, playing around with Lopmon and Terriermon, has the two unfortunate Digimon crying out loudly in pain. Which finally wakes Jenrya up from his deep sleep.
JENRYA: Shaochung, keep it down. And get to sleep. You're not supposed to be up this late. Otou-san and okaa-san would have fits if they knew.
SHAOCHUNG: (cheerful) But onii-chan, Terriermon and I are having fun!
TERRIERMON: (hanging from Shaochung's bedpost by his tied ears) …::sigh:: Moumantai… -_-;
JENRYA: (dryly) Sounds more like you're the one having fun, Shaochung.
SHAOCHUNG: (looks down) Aww… (cheers up) But Lopmon's having fun, right?
LOPMON: (mouth being stretched out by Shaochung) Waa~! Waa~!
JENRYA: (even more dryly) Apparently not. Now stop it and get to bed!
Shaochung plays some more, stretching Lopmon's and Terriermon's apparently rubbery faces and ears to no end, despite Jenrya's constant scolding. Finally, she yawns and goes to bed.
JENRYA: (as dry as he can possibly get) Great. Just great. Now I'm too awake to sleep.
Jenrya looks at the worn out Lopmon and Terriermon and gets a strange idea, most likely because his brain is working at less capacity than usual due to lack of sleep.
JENRYA: Get over here, you two!
TERRIERMON: (hanging by his ears again) ::sigh:: -_-;; Moumantai…
LOPMON: (getting his mouth stretched out by Jenrya) Waa~! Waa~! ;_;
Room 8Strangely as well, the two rivals were sleeping. Unfortunately, Ruki's extreme distrust of Ryo led her to sleep lightly and uneasily. And with every slight snore from Ryo…
RYO: ::snort::
RUKI: (sits up in bed, awake) Huh? What? (glares at Ryo) Oh, just you.
RYO: ::snore::
RUKI: Stupid Ryo… (goes back to sleep, rubbing her eyes)
Room 9You'd expect Takato and Juri to get to sleep nicely as well, right? Well…
JURI: Takato? You asleep yet? Are you there?
TAKATO: (sighs, obviously annoyed) -___-;; Yes, I'm here, Juri. Now get to sleep.
JURI: Oh. Okay.
(Silence)
TAKATO: (turns and goes back to sleep)
JURI: Takato, you're still there, right? I'm not alone, right?
TAKATO: (takes a deep breath to keep from screaming) Yes, Juri, I'm still here. You're not alone.
JURI: Thanks.
TAKATO: Now, get to sleep. Tomorrow's a big day.
JURI: Right. You should get to sleep too. I mean, you're competing, right?
(Silence)
JURI: Takato?
TAKATO: (lets out a huge sigh) Yes?
JURI: Oh. You should be sleeping. You are competing, aren't you?
TAKATO: Yes, Juri, I'm competing. (covers his head with the pillow and blankets)
JURI: Takato? (Silence) Takato? Are you there, Takato? Takato? (scared) Takato?
Juri slides out of bed, picking up her dog puppet from the nearby nightstand.
JURI: I'm sure Takato's there, he's just asleep, right?
JURI'S PUPPET: No doubt, wan! He's just asleep, wan!
JURI: It's not like he's gone out of the room and left me alone in the dark, right?
JURI'S PUPPET: No way, wan!
JURI: But we'll just check to make sure, okay?
JURI'S PUPPET: Okay~!
Juri tiptoes over to Takato's bed and gasps at the sight (or lack of one) of Takato's head and pillow missing. Then she sees the form under the covers. Gingerly, she uses her free hand and the puppet's mouth to yank the covers off and turn on a nearby light.
JURI: KYAAAAA~!!!
TAKATO: Eh?!?! Juri, turn off the light! I'm trying to sleep!
JURI: Oh, sorry. It was just a preconditioned reaction.
TAKATO: (grumbling) Whatever that means…
JURI: (turning off the light and giving Takato the blankets back) Ehehe… I'll just go back to bed and sleep now.
TAKATO: (still grumbling) So much the better… _;;
Silence fills the room as Juri gets back in bed. Unfortunately, she can't sleep and stares at the ceiling. After a few minutes…
JURI: Takato?
Room 10Wishing each other good night is a form of good etiquette, right?
TAKUYA: Omae, konban wa. (Translation: Goodnight, you.)
IZUMI: Look, I've got a perfectly cute name, alright?
TAKUYA: Yeah, sure, whatever. Goodnight.
IZUMI: Not until you get my name right! (grabs Takuya by the wrist)
TAKUYA: What is it now?!
IZUMI: Look, we can make this simple. (spins Takuya to face her) Repeat after me. I-zu-mi.
TAKUYA: (purposely obstinate) O-ma-e.
IZUMI: (huffs and gets a tighter hold on Takuya's shoulders, banging her forehead against his) I-ZU-MI. How hard is it?
TAKUYA: (rolls his eyes and leans backwards slightly) O-ma-e. Now can I get to sleep?
IZUMI: No! Not until you get my name right! Now say it! I-zu-mi. Izumi.
Takuya leans even further backwards, and Izumi nearly falls on top of him. However, she regains her balance and composure, and glares at him.
IZUMI: You really are stupid, aren't you?
TAKUYA: (overreacts) What?! Look, just let me say what I want and let me get to sleep! At least I said 'Goodnight' to you!
IZUMI: But you also don't have any manners, apparently! Now, for the last time, say it!
TAKUYA: (sighs and gives up) Alright, alright… (looks at her blankly) What was it again?
Room 11Junpei and Tomoki aren't sleeping – in fact, they're not even in the room! They're trying to escape… but we don't have a camera in the main hall yet, so you don't get to hear or see the footage of them escaping. But they won't be able to…
KOHAKU: (grinning evilly) We've locked the doors. And just in case they pick the lock, we've got a Trailmon sleeping in front of the doors as a barricade…
Room 12Kouji and Kouichi, the two major untaken bishounen, are sleeping. To some fangirls' dismay, that is.
Camera Room???: Alright, give it up!
KOHAKU: Eh?!?!
The light goes on to reveal Hirokazu and Kenta, arms crossed.
KOHAKU: Oh, shit. Should've checked on their room too.
HIROKAZU: Look, it's not fair that we get stuck with Room 13. The unlucky room.
KENTA: And even worse, we have to sleep in the same room! Just because we're friends doesn't mean we'll tolerate this. Not with all the fangirls wishing we were gay watching.
KOHAKU: (sighs) Fine, then. We'll move you to Room 14.
Kenta and Hirokazu raise their eyebrows. Their respective Digimon step out from behind them, and the two Tamers hold up their D-Arcs and a card threateningly.
KOHAKU: (gulps) Er, that is, Room 14 and 15. One for each Tamer.
HIROKAZU: Much better.
KENTA: And we've got one more condition.
KOHAKU: (mutters something about spoiled brats) Yes?
KENTA: That you let us watch the behind-the-scenes footage as well.
HIROKAZU: So, is it a deal? Or do we have to tell that girl about the hidden cameras that aren't supposed to exist?
KENTA: What was her name again…?
HIROKAZU: Ah…!
KENTA & HIROKAZU: (simultaneously) Coquelicot!
KOHAKU: Eep! Okay, okay, you get to watch this, though you shouldn't be up this late… and look, you can have snacks, too. Just don't tell her, please…
HIROKAZU: Hmm… Okay!
KOHAKU: (lets out a sigh of relief) Whew. Spoiled brats these days.
KENTA: What was that?
KOHAKU: Nothing!
HIROKAZU: Good… Oh, and while we're at it…
~*owari*~
Ending Rant:
Well, hope you enjoyed that bit of insanity. Took 3 days to go through with the entire thing, but I personally think it was worth it. Especially the main funny scenes. My personal favorites are the Room 10 and Room 7 ones. Though 1 and 9 were okay, and the Camera Scene too. If you have any suggestions for these "Interludes", feel free to e-mail them to me, and I'll try to work it in.
But please, people. Review. Or else I won't make more funny stuff for you.