(Darry)
"DO something!" Soda pleaded with the doctors. The oxygen mask was still clamped over Ponyboy's face, but it was useless because his lungs were no longer drawing air. Sodapop begged the doctor's to help him, to put him on a respirator, but they just turned off the alarm and stared at the flat line across the screen. Seeing that they weren't going to help, Soda dropped to his knees and seized our brother's hand again. "Come on, Pony," he pleaded, "breathe again, don't do this now, I ain't ready yet! Hold on for us!"
Two-bit moved forward, his face white, staring in horrified disbelief. "Come on, kiddo....."
"Ponyboy, I'm sorry," Steve whispered, over and over, looking as shocked and frightened as Two-bit.
"Pony please....." Soda begged, looking near tears, "don't do this now, don't do this, come on kid......"
But while the three pleaded for him to stay, I remembered---I thought of Pony vomiting, coughing blood, not sleeping, not eating, barely breathing, our little brother wasting away before our eyes.
Remember you promised, my brother's voice echoed in my mind.
Staring at Pony's wasted, tragically young face, I fought my emotions down, knowing suddenly that this was for the best now. He didn't deserve to hurt anymore.
Go, kid, I thought. It's okay. You can go. I won't hold you here. I'll still love you, wherever you are. Let go. I won't make you deal with the pain anymore.
"Don't!" Soda sobbed.
Do, I thought as the heart monitor followed the breathing one and went flat.
"Don't go, don't go, don't go............"
(Go, Ponyboy. Just let go)
"Pony PLEASE..................."
(Please Pony)
"STAY."
(GO)
And then it was over. The final green line that had danced across the screen lay still, as still my younger brother's body, limp on the bed.
Soda was sobbing onto a still Pony's chest, Two-bit had his arm on the wall and was hiding his face, but I could tell from the jerking of his shoulders that he was sobbing, Steve's face was so white I couldn't believe he didn't faint.
"Time of death 8:35," the doctor murmured, his eyes as little moist as he shut the monitors down.
"No!" Soda wept, "nonononono......." he shouted now, suddenly leaping up and tearing out of the room. Steve took off after him. Two-bit groaned and slipped into the hallway, leaving me and Ponyboy's body. I walked to him slowly.
His eyes were closed, his lips parted slightly. There was no more heaving of his chest, no more raspy breathing, no more vomiting in the middle of the night. He was just still, calm, and finally sleeping.
I bent and brushed my lips over his forehead, briefly wishing I'd had the courage to do it while his skin was still warm, knowing that he'd understood the emotion behind the gesture anyway before leaving us.
"Bye, baby," I murmured, my heart wrenching. But I kept my promise ; I didn't cry.
"DO something!" Soda pleaded with the doctors. The oxygen mask was still clamped over Ponyboy's face, but it was useless because his lungs were no longer drawing air. Sodapop begged the doctor's to help him, to put him on a respirator, but they just turned off the alarm and stared at the flat line across the screen. Seeing that they weren't going to help, Soda dropped to his knees and seized our brother's hand again. "Come on, Pony," he pleaded, "breathe again, don't do this now, I ain't ready yet! Hold on for us!"
Two-bit moved forward, his face white, staring in horrified disbelief. "Come on, kiddo....."
"Ponyboy, I'm sorry," Steve whispered, over and over, looking as shocked and frightened as Two-bit.
"Pony please....." Soda begged, looking near tears, "don't do this now, don't do this, come on kid......"
But while the three pleaded for him to stay, I remembered---I thought of Pony vomiting, coughing blood, not sleeping, not eating, barely breathing, our little brother wasting away before our eyes.
Remember you promised, my brother's voice echoed in my mind.
Staring at Pony's wasted, tragically young face, I fought my emotions down, knowing suddenly that this was for the best now. He didn't deserve to hurt anymore.
Go, kid, I thought. It's okay. You can go. I won't hold you here. I'll still love you, wherever you are. Let go. I won't make you deal with the pain anymore.
"Don't!" Soda sobbed.
Do, I thought as the heart monitor followed the breathing one and went flat.
"Don't go, don't go, don't go............"
(Go, Ponyboy. Just let go)
"Pony PLEASE..................."
(Please Pony)
"STAY."
(GO)
And then it was over. The final green line that had danced across the screen lay still, as still my younger brother's body, limp on the bed.
Soda was sobbing onto a still Pony's chest, Two-bit had his arm on the wall and was hiding his face, but I could tell from the jerking of his shoulders that he was sobbing, Steve's face was so white I couldn't believe he didn't faint.
"Time of death 8:35," the doctor murmured, his eyes as little moist as he shut the monitors down.
"No!" Soda wept, "nonononono......." he shouted now, suddenly leaping up and tearing out of the room. Steve took off after him. Two-bit groaned and slipped into the hallway, leaving me and Ponyboy's body. I walked to him slowly.
His eyes were closed, his lips parted slightly. There was no more heaving of his chest, no more raspy breathing, no more vomiting in the middle of the night. He was just still, calm, and finally sleeping.
I bent and brushed my lips over his forehead, briefly wishing I'd had the courage to do it while his skin was still warm, knowing that he'd understood the emotion behind the gesture anyway before leaving us.
"Bye, baby," I murmured, my heart wrenching. But I kept my promise ; I didn't cry.