Chapter 8 : Hopeful Party
During saturday, SeeDs didn't have any classes so they were free to do what they wanted to. Some trained or just killed time doing nothing. Carole tried to make herself useful at home to kill time.
"Aren't you meeting Squall today?" her mother asked her.
She was the only one at home with Carole. Robert, Pierre and Rachel were attending class that day and her father had a job as a repairman in Garden.
"Why?"
She pushed her hair back and kept cleaning the room from the toys and clothes scattered around the place.
"You left to meet him everyday since you're out of the infirmary. Is there something you're not telling?"
"Not at all."
"Then why aren't you telling what you do when you go meet him?"
Carole smiled heavily and turned around.
"You never asked questions when I was meeting Miaka! Why do you keep teasing me about Squall? Or on the Lunar Base? What was I doing with Adam?"
"It's not the same thing, you were working in the same area."
"And what do you think I'm doing with Squall?! We're training for heaven's sake!! Trai-ning! As a SeeD, this IS working!"
"Why are you so mad?"
"Nnh! YOU makes me mad!"
She left everything there nad headed straight for the stairs.
"I'm gonna clean MY room..."
While she was climbing up the stairs, she could feel her mother's eyes tracing her. Maybe I over reacted...
The night came and Carole could put her SeeD uniform on. She made a small plait each side of her head and tied them together on the back of her head. She smiled at her reflection in the Garden's bathroom and left for the party. She took a quick look around to see if there already were some of her friends there. She spotted Miaka and Gackt by the table where the food was displayed. She hardly recognized them because of their respective uniforms.
"Hi guys!"
The two of them turned around. Miaka looked at her from top to bottom.
"Carole-chan! Boy you look great! That hair style of yours is cool."
"Thanks Mia-chan. You look great too. And you too Gackt."
"So you remember about me?"
Carole smiled and looked around.
"Have you seen my sister and Zell around somewhere?"
Both her friends pointed the dance floor. Carole turned around and saw Zell's chicken hair style. He had his uniform on too and Carole buried a laugh in her throat. The uniform was not suiting his funny face and hair. There, dancing with Zell was Rachel, wearing a long tight-fitting dress. Her hair was piled up on her head. Carole couldn't look away from the red dress, it was attracting every eyes. She finally managed to look away and saw Audrey and Seifer by the door. Even though they were on duty, they were both wearing great looking clothes, the types to wear at a ball (hope you can make yourself an idea, I don't know how to describe it.)
Still looking on the dance floor, she was now looking for Squall. For a second, she feared he didn't come.
Gackt placed a hand on her shoulder and pointed a finger at the other side of the room, to a pillar away from the dancers. Leaning against that pillar was a guy with a SeeD uniform looking at his feet with his arms folded.
"He's there," Gackt said with a warm smile. "He's bored out of his mind and doesn't want to do anything except stay there. Wonder why he came if he doesn't have fun?"
"He promised me," Carole answered.
"Really?"
Carole walked across the dance floor and past by Quistis dancing with a familiar dark haired boy. Not stopping to try and remember who it was, she continued forward to Squall. She approached him from aside and hit him with her shoulder. When he turned his head to her, he appeared to lighten up.
"There you are!"
"Have I kept you waiting?"
"You sure did! What took you so long?"
"You told me you'd come, I never told you to be here the whole time."
"Is that so?"
Squall went to leave and Carole caught his arm.
"Hey, where're you going?"
He turned around with a funny smile.
"I was just joking!"
"I'm not so sure about that..."
She looked at her hand still holding Squall's arm and released him. Squall just stood in front of Carole with a hand on his hip.
"So how did you spend your day?"
"Disturbing everyone because I couldn't wait for tonight."
"Some people are like that. Miaka was running around Garden the whole day."
"Oh, yeah?"
"Yeah and Gackt woke me up to ask me if I was attending the party too."
"And what did you do?"
"He threw his pillow in my face yelling: 'I will if you let me sleep you big jerk!'"
Carole and Squall turned their head to Gackt coming to them with Miaka, her arm under his. Carole chuckled.
"Remind me to go get my pillow back in your room," Squall said.
"No way!" Carole exclaimed. "You kept it?"
"I couldn't imagine myself going back into Squall's room to give him his pillow so I walked in Garden looking dumb with this stupid pillow under my arm!!"
The girls laughed happily and Squall hid a smile behind his hand. Gackt looked from one to another and frowned.
"Squall you owe me for that!"
"Really? And who's the one who came in m,y room at 6 o'clock?"
"Come on! You even used to get up earlier than that when we were younger!"
"Earlier than 6?! You guys are crazy!"
The music turned more rythmic. Miaka pulled Gackt's arm.
"Come on, let's go dance!"
"Alright... Later guys!"
The couple walked to the dance floor and Carole looked at them an envying way but she knew Squall wouldn't dance. Who said there was only Squall? There could be some other guy who would dance with her.
"Hi, Carole," a voice said.
Squall and Carole turned their head in the same time to find Rinoa with Adam facing them.
"I guess that uniform proves you're a SeeD," Adam said to his friend. "You look great."
"Thanks. You too."
Adam was wearing black pants with a white shirt. And Rinoa was wearing her white sleeveless dress.
"So how did it go?"
"For a moment, I thought I would fail."
"Why?"
"Well..."
"Hum," Rinoa cut in. "Squall? What do you say we leave them alone and go dance?"
Squall looked at her and Carole was afraid he would refuse... or was she afraid he would accept? He turned to her for an answer.
"Go ahead! Since you're here, you should enjoy it!"
Rinoa joined her hands in front of her face and smiled.
"Great!"
She took Squall's hand and dragged him on the dance floor.
"He...hey!"
He didn't even had the time to answer. Carole chuckled at the sight and Adam moved to her side.
"She looks fine and great. Is she?"
"Come on, let's not talk about that. Tell me what happened after the crash."
"Well, I was in as escape pod with Robert, Pierre and Rachel. When we got on Earth, the crew collected us and we found our parents. Then we went back to Esthar."
She told him they gor trapped in the city because of the monsters and that's when she decided to become a SeeD, because she felt useless and helpless so her family moved to Balamb once things calmed down.
"You can't imagine how glad I was when I saw you in Timber," he said.
"Me too! But what happened to you?"
"Nothing exciting. The crew collected us and we just got back in Timber."
"Oh, yeah! You used to live there. No surprise you met Rinoa."
"I met her in the bar. She said that now that Timber was independant, there was peace but with Zone and Watts away, she wasn't feeling safe and she asked me if I would be part of her movement. I barely knew her and she was... quite drunk. I said I would be glad to and the next day, she asked me if I knew one more person who could join the group. That's how Dave and I became part of the Timber Wings."
"Dave! That's it! Did he come here with you?"
"Sure, our group was invited. Why?"
"I think I saw him dancing with Quistis a while ago."
"Who's Quistis?"
"An instructor. She got blond hair and sometimes wear glasses."
"Hum... oh, yeah! I saw her. He seems to like her."
For a moment, they didn't say anything and it was like the silence dragged Carole's eyes to the dance floor and more precisely on Squall and Rinoa. Rinoa was smiling but Squall seemed nostalgic.
Before she'd start asking stupid questions, Carole thought of something to say but couldn't come up with anything.
"Why did you say you thought you'd fail your exam?"
Thanks Adam...
"Because I disobeyed my leader and one of Garden's rules."
"How come?"
"He asked me to leave when he got hurt. 'If a team member is hurt but that the mission is at stake, the wounded SeeDs are to be left behind even if it's the leader.' By going back to save him, I disobeyed him and Garden. But I was told that my actions made them realize that it was stupid and the rule was erased."
"Great!"
The dance ended and Squall and Rinoa got back, not close to each other, Carole noticed. Rinoa went straight to Adam's side and Squall on the opposite, by Carole's side.
A girl carrying a tray with wine cups offered them one. Squall took one along with Carole and Rinoa but Adam hesitated.
"I'm not really the wine type."
"Try it," Carole encouraged. "We're celebrating here and it will make a change."
Adam took a cup and the girl walked away after smiling at them. Carole watched as Adam took a sip of his drink.
"Well... I prefer..."
"Beer and cocktails?" Carole teased.
"Well, yeah."
"Oh! Watch out Rinoa, he's alcoholic!"
"That's not true!" Adam objected. "It's just that I like to drink."
"Is there a difference?"
Carole laughed and Rinoa followed.
"Don't encourage her, Rinny!"
Squall looked away and Carole peeked at him from the corner of her eye. I bet you're wondering what's she doing with him, she thought.
"Hey, Adam! What do you say we dance?" she asked winking at Rinoa.
"My, why not!"
They put their cup away and headed for the dance floor. Squall looked at them. Traitor, he thought.
Rinoa knew why Carole did that. After all, she was a Sorceress and she was good in guessing what was on people's mind. Carole saw that Squall was not really at ease with his ex-girlfriend. Giving them some time together could help settle things between them.
Squall rested against the pillar again, sipping at his cup. Rinoa just stood there, trying to find what to say. She was not at ease at all. There was a time where they would have given their life to save each other but now, they could hardly stand each other.
Rinoa looked at Adam and Carole. Both were laughing, having great fun.
"She seems kind. Is she your friend?"
"Yes, she is."
"She looks like a nice girl. Is she nice to you?"
"She understands me and believes in me most of the time... excluding the exam..."
"Is it because she's a SeeD?"
"Maybe..."
Rinoa just nodded and played with her cup in her hands. She opened her mouth to say something else when Squall closed his eyes.
"Look Rinoa, I don't want to talk. It will never be as it was between us again.. And it's your fault..."
His tone was harsh and cold. Rinoa reached for her necklace for courage and comfort when she remembered something.
"I know it's my fault... I know I hurt you Squall and there's no way we can go back. I've got Adam and you'll find someone else too... eventually..."
Squall turned to her, frowning curiously.
"You can see the future, now?" he asked sarcastically.
"No, of course not. But I know what I know."
She placed her cup aside and reached for the back of her necklace.
"The day I... told you about it, I saw the pain in your eyes but you left without a word."
"What do you know about my pain? You were my first love ever, Rinoa!"
"Sooner or later, it would have ended, Squall... For not being a SeeD, I couldn't understand your duty. Sooner or later, I would have grown tired of the missions."
She took her necklace off and pulled out one of the rings on it.
"Here, I have no right to keep this anymore."
She handed him the ring she got from Zell what seemed like so long ago. Squall took it and looked at it a moment. Zell had tricked him in lending it to him and in the end, Rinoa ended up with it.
"The first time I handed it back to you, you told me to keep it but now..."
Squall put the ring on his finger and stared at it a moment. It haven't been there for months. It felt weird to have it now.
"Someday, you'll look back at this day and you'll know I was right."
"I don't think so but still... I hope so..."
Carole and Adam were coming back, laughing happily.
"You're a good dancer," Adam said.
"As a SeeD, it's part of the classes. You're not bad either! Betcha Rinoa taught you."
"Is that so obvious?"
Looking at Rinoa and Squall's faces, Carole knew she made a mistake. It seemed like things have gotten worst. Rinoa looked at Adam, her eyes asking him to do something only he could understand. Adam looked around and spotted his cousin not far with Quistis and Zell. The tattooed guy waved their way.
"Hey Squall! Come here!"
Dave waved at them too and Adam waved back. This was a good occasion. Squall gladly walked to his friend and Adam followed him, taking another glass of wine in the process. Rinoa was now alone with Carole.
"I don't know if it's because of me but he has changed," Rinoa said. "Or maybe is it because of you?"
"What do you mean?" Carole asked coughing a little.
Rinoa smiled, putting a hand on the girl's arm.
"I barely know you but I'm a Sorceress and I can feel it. You're nervous around him and your eyes shine everytime you look at him."
Carole blushed shamefully.
"Re... Really?"
"It's the kind of thing and expert could tell. Have you told him?"
"You're kidding? At first I was just a training partner and he couldn't think about anyone but you. It's really hard for him."
Rinoa sighed, feeling guilty.
"I thought it was the right thing to do... But you said 'at first', what about now?"
"We're friends."
"There's a first step in everything. Don't give up. I have a feeling you might be the one he waited for his whole life. You're just what I couldn't be."
"Which is?"
"A SeeD."
Carole wasn't sure to understand.
"I don't know if it could work for you too, but when he comes back, why not ask him for a dance? It was the first thing for us."
"No," Carole said shaking her head. "He's not like you knew him anymore. He wouldn't dance with me."
"How can you know until you try? There's nothing to lose."
"I can't, he wouldn't."
"I still think you should give it a try."
Carole looked at Rinoa who smiled warmly, encouraging her.
"Maybe..."
Rinoa noticed she was almost talking like Squall and that brought a smile to her face.
Zell went back to dance with Rachel highly insisting after being glad to see Adam.
"Tell your sister I'd be glad to see her if I drop by Timber!"
"Sure!"
Dave was standing close to Quistis who appeared to like him too. Adam got close to Squall and whispered something to him.
"Shall we leave them alone?"
Squall was trying but he couldn't hate the guy. He wasn't bad after all. For a long time, he has wondered what kind of guy Rinoa's new boyfriend was and now he knew he wasn't bad. He was trying to be friendly with and Squall had to give him credits for that. He nodded and the guys walked back to their female friends.
"Did ya miss us?" Adam asked.
"Not at all!" Rinoa answered a funny way.
"Is that so?"
He turned around and made a single step before turning back when the girls started laughing. Squall had to admit he was funny, but not serious enough for his taste. But then again, Zell wasn't really serious either.
The lights faded a little and a slow dance began. Rinoa asked Adam to go and they went to dance. Further, Zell took Rachel, Dave went with Quistis and Gackt and Miaka never left the dance floor so they kept dancing on that one.
Squall rested against the pillar once again and Carole decided to lean on another side. She looked up to the stars through the glass on the celling before turning her head to Squall.
"You know, you're a good leader, Squall. You're a good friend too, not like Adam, though. He's a good friend of mine, kind and everything don't you think? No wonder Rinoa fell for him. She's kinda nice too, I didn't think she would... they, um, are looking, er, great together..."
She coughed to clear her throat, realizing what she was saying didn't have any sense. She bit her lip remembering what Rinoa said and decided to take her advice. She turned to Squall again with determination on her face.
"Squall! Let's imagine that I would ask you to dance with me, what would you say?"
Her heart started beating faster while she was waiting for an answer. For a moment, she thought he might have been thinking about something and not hear her. When he lowered his head, she felt like her heart stopped and she stopped breathing.
"No..." he said simply.
Carole's heart started beating again but it ached a little. Deceived, she leant back against the pillar. Squall looked up.
"But... I wouldn't mind just walk and talk..."
The girl's eyes shone and she smiled moving away from the pillar. Squall moved away too and walked out the ballroom, Carole following him.
On the dance floor, Miaka opened her eyes and saw her friend leaving with Squall. She tapped Gackt's shoulder and discreetly pointed him what she saw. They smiled and Gackt tightened his grip around Miaka. She close her eyes and rested her cheek against his shoulder again.
"Do you think they'll ever be together?" she asked in a whisper.
"Why not?" he whispered back. "We are together."
"It's not really the same thing..."
The two SeeDs walked around Garden, passing in front of the dorms, the parking lot, the training center, the library, the front gate, the infirmary, the quad, the cafeteria and the dorms again.
They were walking side by side and Carole couldn't help peeking at quall. He was so cool in his uniform!
Walking in silence, alone with him which never happened before, made the girl uneasy, nervous so she thought of something to say.
"It wasn't really good outside today, wasn't it? I wanted to help my mom cleaning the house but she got on my nerves again and I locked myself in my room as usual. I was bored in fact. No class and no training with you..."
She knew she must have been red with shame. She was too nervous. Why that? She used to be alone with Squall before but not like this. She had a feeling she was boring and it scared her. She didn't want squall to think she was boring.
"I talk nonsense, you must think I'm weird."
"Not at all. You're afraid I can be bored, I can guess from the way you talk. Don't be. You know what? I feel like you understand me... just the way I wanted Rinoa to..."
What do you mean? Why do you compare me, your simple friend, to your ex-girlfriend? It's not the same thing at all!
"I kinda really missed your company the three weeks you avoided me. I've gotten used to see you all the time so not to see you at all for three weeks made me feel like something was missing."
Carole felt her heart beat faster again. Why are his words moving me like that? Am I hoping for something?
"I felt alone again."
He wasn't even looking at her, just right in front of him.
She wanted to apologize for being away those three weeks but the words wouldn't come out. They couldn't find their way to her lips.
Squall suddenly stopped and Carole stopped along. Then she realized they were back at the front gate. Squall turned to her and smiled. For a moment, she thought he would add something or do something...
"It's getting late. You should go home now. Can we meet again tomorrow? We'll train before dinner, what do you say?"
Huh? Is that all? Leaving already?
"Huh, sure! Why not?"
Squall nodded and turned his back, waving at her. She looked at him going.
You're just leaving like this? You wanted to 'talk' just to say something I already knew?!
She sticked her tongue out at him.
"Sukoru no baka..." she whispered.
She couldn't help smiling before turning her back on Garden and heading outside to go back home.