Chapter 7
Gandalf's Return: Memories
Legolas was roused from his dozing as the tent flap opened. Gandalf stepped inside and walked silently over to the pair on the bed. He clasped Legolas' shoulder and smiled.
"How is he?" he asked, shifting to lean his staff against the wall and adjust his white robes. Legolas looked solemnly down at the slumbering half-dragon. He had only stirred once, but was quickly quieted by Legolas' soft elven singing.
"He is sleeping peacefully now," said the elf. "How are the others?" he asked. Gandalf shrugged.
"The hobbits sleep, while Aragorn keeps council with Theoden," he paused. "They require your presence, Legolas, and I want you to eat something," said the wizard sternly. Legolas frowned.
"I said that I would remain with Kalan," he protested. Gandalf quelled him with a look.
"I shall stay with the young one, you need to eat something and then go to Aragorn, he needs your wisdom," he said in a tone that left no room for argument. Legolas hesitated but then nodded. The elf rose, slowly as to not wake Kalan, edging out from behind the boy he laid the limp form back against the cushions. Legolas tucked the blankets up around Kalan's chin. He stood, looking down at the sleeping face of his friend, a sad expression on his face. Gandalf placed a hand on the prince's arm, smiling gently.
"I will keep him safe from his dreams, young Legolas. Go now," he gave the elf a soft nudge toward the door. With a backward glance, Legolas left the tent. With a heavy sigh the wizard turned back to the slumbering dragon. Kalan had begun to stir, noticing the absence of the elf's comforting light. He whimpered softly, tossing his head to the side as the darkness began to creep back to his soul.
Gandalf sat on the bed beside his young friend; he reached out a hand to caress the dark head. A power, good and benevolent radiated from the old body of the wizard. It enveloped the smaller body in a cocoon on comfort and Light. With his power he reached into Kalan's mind and drew the youngling out of the darkness and into his Light.
"Come back to me, my young dragon. Come back and see the Light that shines for you," he called. Kalan's eyelids twitched and he opened the silver orbs. He looked into Gandalf's face for a long while, drinking in the power of Gandalf's Light.
"Gandalf, what are you doing? Where is Legolas?" he asked in a soft voice. The wizard smiled and pulled back some of his power, hiding it once again inside the old body.
"I have sent him to get some food," he answered. "Kalan, my dear little dragon, how is it that we always find ourselves in this position?" he asked in a gently tone. Kalan shook his head, and smiled a wry smile, but a smile nonetheless. Gandalf leaned over him and whispered into his ear. "I will help you all that I can, but you must trust me, for I will leave soon and shall not be near to help for a long while," he pulled back to look into Kalan's eyes. "Let me heal you as you remember a better time, when I first met you, little dragon," he said. The two of them went back in time, to Rivendell when Kalan was still young.
*
(Flashback)
Elrond was in another of his strange meetings, Glorfindel had returned with news from Mirkwood and the lands beyond. Walking sullenly through the gardens of Imladris, Kalan kicked his small feet in the dirt. He was twelve years old, no longer a child that had to be watched and coddled. He grumbled under his breath, but in his heart he knew that Elrond only wanted to protect him. At the thought of the tall elf lord, his thoughts turned lighter and he smiled. He was so wrapped up in his thoughts that he nearly ran into the two figures walking his way.
"Whoa! Watch where you are going, young Kalan, you nearly bowled the both of us over!" a light voice said, filled with laughter, and someone else chuckled. Kalan looked up into the smiling faces of the twin son's of Elrond. Elladan crouched down so he could look into Kalan's silver eyes. "What has occupied your thoughts so much, hm?" he smiled, like a big brother. Kalan blushed not wanting to reveal his thoughts about their father. Elrohir above them grinned.
"Perhaps a young maid? Someone beautiful to spend your days with," he ventured. Kalan looked up at the younger twin and scowled.
"No, that's not it," he said in his small, still childlike voice. How Kalan whished for the rich deep voices of the elves around him. "I was just thinking…" he trailed off. Then a thought occurred to him. "What are you two doing?" he asked, hoping they could go out riding. Elladan caught the hopeful look and shook his head.
"We are going out on a hunting party, we shall be gone for more than a month," he said. "You cannot come with us, Kalan, it is far too dangerous," he said with a sad look. Kalan looked at the ground, getting angry.
"I am not a child you know!" he said heatedly, "I could scout for you, find the orcs and tell you where they are," he said, knowing that the twins already knew about his wings like their father and sister. "I could fly high above them and shoot my bow!" he said excitedly. Elrohir laughed lightly at the hopeful and childlike expression on Kalan's young face. Elladan chuckled too, but then sobered.
"I know you could, Gildae," he said using the name Elrond had given to Kalan upon his arrival in Rivendell, "But you are still young and learning, I have no wish to see you hurt," he said, embracing the young boy in a brotherly hug. He stood once more. "Perhaps when you are a bit older and bigger, you can accompany us on our hunts, but until then you should see to your studies and obey Father," he said with an admonishing look.
"Speaking of studies, aren't you supposed to be with Erestor learning of the histories?" asked Elrohir with a twinkle in his eyes. Kalan's face reddened and he looked away sheepishly.
"Well…histories are boring!" he said, clenching his small fists. "I want to learn how to hunt orcs, how to fight and be a warrior like you, brothers," he said. Kalan had already learned to think of the twins and of Arwen as his siblings, in heart if not in blood. The elves didn't seem to mind.
"We know, Gildae, but even we too had to learn them, it is what makes us wise and helps us not to repeat the same mistakes," said Elladan. He bent down and ruffled Kalan's dark hair. "Now go back to Erestor before you give him a gray hair," he said jokingly. Kalan frowned but said nothing. He looked back over his shoulder, watching the twins make their way to the stables. 'I just wanna help,' he thought. Kalan looked up at the tall buildings of Rivendell. He took notice of a figure peeping into each room, faintly he heard a voice.
"Gildae? Where are you, boy? When I find you…" it was Erestor. Kalan shook his head, not stupid enough to go back. He turned and went into the forests. The young boy walked for a long while until he came to a cliff. A determined expression came across his face. 'I will be useful. I'll show them I can be just as good as any elf!' he thought. He closed his eyes, concentrating, and clenched his fists. Kalan gritted his teeth so not to cry out. His silver wings erupted from his back, causing his small body to quiver in pain. But he forced himself to push the pain aside. He walked to the edge of the cliff, looking down. It was a long way down; he could only see the tops of the trees.
"I will do this, I will show them," he said under his breath. He spread his wings, closed his eyes and jumped. The wings caught the breeze and Kalan opened his eyes, seeing he was flying. Elrond had told him never to use his wings without need, but he needed to show them he was good, he could do things.
Suddenly, a strong wind came up and Kalan lost balance. His wings buckled, and he tumbled about on the wind. The boy screamed as he was pushed back against the cliff. He hit the hard stone, and slid down, plummeting until he came to rest on a ledge, some ways away from the top. Kalan groaned, his back and wings were torn up. Then, unexpectedly his wings folded back and were drawn back into his body. Kalan screamed again, and huddled into himself. The wind whipped at his face and body. His tunic had been ripped along with his breeches. Elrond would not be happy.
Then it began to rain, things were not looking good for the young half-dragon. Kalan called out for anyone, but he was too far away from the city for anyone to hear him. He was quickly drenched and the boy shivered. 'Now what? I'm stuck out here, Elrond is gonna be so mad at me,' he thought. Miserable and frightened the boy curled up on the ledge.
He didn't know how much time had passed since he had gotten stuck, but soon it was dark, and the rain was stopping. Kalan shivered and hugged his shoulder. 'I'm gonna die out here,' he thought. In a moment of desperation he called out with his mind, trying to do as Elrond had been teaching him. He had never been able to do the trick yet, though. ~Help me!!~ he called. Feeling scared and close to tears, Kalan huddled farther into himself.
Suddenly, there was a sound above him, hooves hitting the dirt and a voice called down to him.
"Boy? Are you alright?" Kalan looked up, it was an old man in gray robes and pointed hat. In a different situation Kalan might have chuckled at the man, but being stuck here he hoped this man would help him. "Do you need a hand, lad?" called the old man again. Kalan stood.
"Yes!" he replied, calling up to the newcomer. "I'm stuck down here, I can't get back up!" he said. The old man nodded and then moved away from the ledge. "Wait! Come back, please!" Kalan called out in fear. He was going to leave him here? Then the man returned and held something down to him. It was a wooden staff, maybe six or seven feet in length.
"Grasp the end, boy!" called down the old man. Fearfully, Kalan reached up to the staff, but then withdrew his hand, looking back down at the huge drop. "Don't worry, my lad, I wont let you fall!" the man called down to him and Kalan nodded. He felt a tendril of power and Light come to him, a sense of reassurance and safety. Kalan grasped the wooden staff and held on tightly, as the old man swiftly pulled him to the top of the cliff, with strength that defied his old looks.
When Kalan was safely at the top, he collapsed to the ground, shaking with cold and repressed fear. The old man knelt beside him, wiping his mussed and wet hair out of Kalan's face. "Where are you from, dear boy?" he asked. Kalan answered through chattering teeth.
"Rivendell," he said. He felt very cold and hugged his arms for warmth. His savior smiled and wrapped his own gray cloak around the boy's shivering body.
"Well, you are in luck, I was just headed there myself when I heard you call out to me with your mind." This made Kalan start.
"With my mind?" he asked in awe. The old man nodded.
"Yes, I guess you are one of Elrond's protégés, well, the old elf is probably worried sick about you, so lets get you back, shall we," he said and gathered up the shivering body in his arms. He mounted his horse, which waited for him patiently, and urged the steed toward the elven city. Kalan sat, huddled in the old man's cloak, shivering, his wet clothes sticking coldly to his skin.
"Who are you?" he asked softly, looking up at the old man, the long gray beard tickled his cheeks. The man looked down at the small boy in his arms and smiled.
"I am Mithrandir, you can call me Gandalf, though, my lad," he said with a grandfatherly twinkle in his eyes. "And you must be Kalan Gildae, the one whom Elrond has told me so much about in his letters. How in Arda did you get stuck on that cliff, my dear boy?" he asked, genuinely concerned and curious, but mostly trying to keep the boy awake, seeing the signs of hypothermia.
"Well, I was trying to fly," he said, not really noticing what he was saying, but he felt safe in Gandalf's arms, and so began to tell the old wizard his tale and yearning to be a warrior like the twins. It was much later when the pair reached Rivendell and Kalan was half asleep, but warmer.
Elrond ran out of his House along with Glorfindel, Arwen and Erestor to meet them. Gandalf dismounted and his horse allowed itself to be led away by a young elf. Holding the boy close he met the Lord of the Valley, who looked very worried. When Elrond saw what he was holding he gasped.
"Kalan!" he rushed forward and took the yawning boy from the wizard, holding him still wrapped in the gray cloak. "Kalan, where have you been? We have been looking everywhere for you, I even sent out search parties. Erestor came to me and said you skipped out of your lesson, then we couldn't find you for hours, by Earendil, boy, you nearly worried me all the way to Mandos!" he said holding the small body close to his chest. Kalan looked up at the elf lord, through half-closed eyes.
"I'm sorry, Elrond, I was trying to fly," Elrond's eyes flew wide and he stared down at his young charge in shock. "I wanted to show you all that I could be useful, as a warrior. But a huge wind came up and knocked be back against the cliff, then it began to rain and I couldn't climb back up, and my wings and back were torn up, and I was cold and scared and…" at this point Kalan was crying, tears falling silently from his wide silver eyes, his breath hitched. Elrond felt a lump in his throat.
"Aiya, amin ai'galad,"1 and he clasped the smaller body to his own. They stood there, like that, for long minutes. Something wet dripped onto Kalan's forehead and he looked up at the elf. Elrond was crying.
"Elrond…" Kalan reached up and brushed a tear away with his small hand. "I didn't mean to make you worry, don't cry," he said. Elrond smiled at his innocence.
"I am just glad that you are alright, Gildae. I don't know what I would do if you were ever harmed," said the elf. Elrond held Kalan close and looked up at the wizard. "Thank you, Mithrandir, how did you ever find him?" he asked. The wizard smiled.
"It is him that you should be proud of, if had not called out with his mind, I would have never found him," he said. Elrond looked surprised, and he looked down at the boy in his arms. Kalan was swiftly falling asleep, he dark head lolling against the elf's shoulder.
"His mind?" he whispered. Klan had never been able to mindspeak before, Elrond has been trying to teach him how, but Kalan had seemed to be resistant. Maybe this incident had finally opened up his mind. ~My little dragon, I am proud of you. ~ he thought to the sleeping boy. Kalan smiled in his sleep and snuggled closer. "Thank you, Mithrandir, you don't know how precious he is to me," said Elrond. Gandalf smiled.
"I have an idea, my friend," he replied. "He is a precious Light, Elrond, I can see what you said about his great potential," said the wizard. The elf lord nodded.
"Yes," he said, a wistful expression on his ageless face. "I am going to put him to bead, but I wish to hear what news you bring," said the elf. "Erestor, please show Mithrandir to where he will be staying." The seneschal nodded and bowed to his lord. Erestor motioned for the wizard to follow him. Elrond dismissed Glorfindel to escort his daughter back to her rooms, both relieved that the boy had been found. The Lord of the Valley walked the corridor to Kalan's room and placed the sleeping boy on the bed. He divested him of his wet and torn clothing and replaced them with a warm sleeping robe. He then tucked the covers up around Kalan's chin.
Elrond stood there for a while, just watching the boy sleep, the deep, even breathing. Watching his chest rise and fall, almost willing the child to keep breathing. He had been so afraid of losing the child this night; there had been no sign of him at all. Elrond had felt as if his heart would break if he lost this precious little Light. When he seen the boy in Mithrandir's arms he nearly cried with joy … but wait, he did cry. Elrond lifted a hand to touch his own cheek, where Kalan had wiped away his tears. 'Amin ai'galad, my heart would break if ever you were to be hurt, if you were to leave me, melamin,' Elrond thought as he caressed Kalan's midnight hair. His hand stopped suddenly, realizing what he had thought. 'My love?' he looked down at the sleeping beautiful Light before him. 'Do I love him?'
Kalan suddenly shifted, turning onto his side. He mumbled something in his sleep. If not for the keen hearing of elves, Elrond would never have heard it.
"Elrond, diola lle, amin mela lle,"2 he whispered. Elrond started, Kalan had said it; had said that he loved him. Such pure trust and love coming from one so small, Elrond smiled and stroked his head. Kalan smiled and leaned into the touch, longing for the touch of one who loved him, like a father, almost. "Elrond…" Kalan was still talking in his sleep, and was grasping at the blankets like he was trying to find something. Elrond hesitated. How could he leave? Finally, he gave into his heart and lay down beside the boy, still stroking his hair. Kalan scooted over to him, until he was wrapped in his arms.
Elrond sighed, content, just holding the little one who had brought light and love back to his life. He felt Kalan relax against him and sigh. Elrond gently, tenderly kissed the top of the dark head. He felt the young one's mind quiet as Kalan drifted off into a deep sleep. Elrond did so as well, not even caring that he was still in his elaborate robes. All that mattered to the elf lord was that his ai'galad was returned to him unharmed.
Elrond remained there the rest of the night, holding the little one close, reassuring himself of his presence.
(End flashback)
*
The two of them returned to the present, and Kalan had a few tears running down his cheeks, but these were not tears of despair, but of happy remembrance. Gandalf gently wiped them away with his hand and smiled down at the broken half-dragon.
"You see? There is always the memory of a happier time that can bring light back to the soul," he leaned over and kissed the top of Kalan's head. "Never forget that, Gildae, he still thinks of you, even now. He still loves you and that will never change. Remember his love, and let that strengthen you," he patted Kalan's shoulder and pulled the covers up around his slim shoulders.
The wizard passed a hand over Kalan's eyes, letting a bit of his power send the young one to sleep. As Kalan drifted off, the wizard sat back, watching and waiting. He had used his powers to help heal the boy as much as he could, but most of the healing would have to come from within and from his soul mate. Gandalf sighed, hoping and praying for the best, knowing that Kalan, above all, did not deserve this pain.
Gandalf watched over the boy until Legolas returned. The elf returned to his earlier position, holding the half-dragon against his body. Gandalf stood and bid the elf farewell, for he was leaving with Pippin for Gondor. He hoped all would go better in the morning.
**This was my favorite part to write, I hope you all enjoyed it as well! REVIEW ME!!!**
1 Oh, my little light
2 Elrond, thank you, I love you