Boyager: A day in the life of Heaven
HeavenofMine was fiddling with buttons in astrometrics, she pretended to look at the
screen and seem interested, however on closer inspection the screen was displayinga
a loop of random images. Cpt Janeday entered, with a new goth look.
Heaven: Captain?
Janeday: The shows writers decided my hair was the same style for too long,
and it was either ginger or this.
Heaven: I see, the obvious choice.
Janeday: So how are those scans comming along? Are we near the uhh....what do you call
it again, uhm...Britney...no...what was that....
Heaven smacked janeway on the head, making her gasp and fall over
Heaven: Jesus christ you stupid bitch, the ALPHA QUADRANT. Its the fucking ALPHA QUADRANT
You dumbass whoore.
Janeday slowly stood up, placing her hair back into a perfect style and primping her
uniform.
Janeday: Yes, thats it. are we near the BALPHIC QUADRANT yet?
Heaven shook her head as her eyes went on fire
Heaven: Being a captain must be easy.
Janeday: Hmm, im out of coffee, is there a coffee machine in here?
Heaven: ARGGGGGGGH GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE YOU IRRITATING MANLY LESBIAN!
Janeday: (in varsity cheerleader style) K
With that Janeday left astrometrics, she skipped along the corridor singing
old Britney Spears songs. Two ensigns stood in the corridor.
Ensign1: Why wont they give me a name yet!?
Ensign2: Deal with it.
Ensign1: Oh jesus christ, here she comes.
Ensign2: Quick look busy, she wont disturb you then.
Janeday gleefully skipped pasted and fell into the turbolift, standing up with her
hair in perfect place.
Janeday: Computer, report.
Computer: Leave me alone, its my only day off, i just give and give and give, and
my only day with the doctor results in you irritating me! Leave me alone, i
cant take it any more.
Janeday: K...Now report.
Computer: Commander Chakotayayay is harrasing heavenofmine in astrometrics.
=/\=Chakotayayay to computer/janeway=/\=
Chakotayayay:Come on baby, dont be like that, ive always got time for you.
Computer: You just arent fufilling me needs any more, the doctor can take
me where i wanna bee.
Janeday: Ewwww. Enough.
Janeday arrived on the bridge and sat on her chair, and the sound of a whoppee cushion
could be heard on the bridge
Karry Him began laughing histerically at the gag, hes pale face draining as though
he was having an asthma attack.
Janeday: Shut Up you annoying little man.
Karrys face drooped. He started crying.
Karry: My mommy said your a mean bitch.
Janeday: Thats It,
Janeday pulled a little revolver from her pocket and shot karry on the head, the whole
bridge pulled party streamers and began to applaud
Janeday: I cant believe the wrote out Bes instead of Him.
With that Bes beamed onto the bridge
Bes: Im back! The writers wrote me in again, and tomorrow weve got a lesbian love scene
with seven! But for now, im givng you another plant, here you go captain, heres a plant
take my plant, its such a pretty plant, i know you like plants, so i grew this plant
just for you, have my plant, here take it.
Janeday looked horrified by a plant loving Bes.
Janeday: Uhm, thanks,
Janeday pressed a button and flung the plant out an airlock.
Bes began crying histerically and bit of one of janedays hands.
Janeday: Ow.
Bes ran off the bridge as Chakotayayay, Belanna, Doc, and Heaven all arrived.
Rom Harrass: Gooooood Morning sleeeeeeepy heaaaa......
All: Shut the Fuck Up!
Belanna dragged herself about, smacking ensigns randomly on the head.
Heaven walked up to Janeday.
Heaven: Captain, due to the lack of my presence in the last Bar Preck: Boyager,
ratings fell around 99%, only Bill Clinton watched because he has a fetish for
Klingons.
Janeday: Well thats a bitch aint it?
Heaven: Well the writers insist on me bending over alot on the bridge for now
i will pretend i am fixing a console.
Janeday: Hmm Yes, im thinking of getting my nose pierced.
Tuvok: That is not advisable, your nose may become septic, and you may talk more like
mickey mouse than usual.
Janeday: Get a real job
Tuvok: Im a male jigallo in 45 states in USA.
Janeday: K......
Computer: I have killed commander chakotayayay.
Janeday: Oh well, how sad never mind.
Computer: He began recording a biography of his life in a tribe.
Janeday: Poor you. Ill arrange therapy.
Heaven: Captain, theres a borg cube just appeared out of no where and its transporting drones
onboard
Janeday: Yey! Pool party
What will happen, tune in for part three of Boyager to find out if the drones
really do want to dance and swim to Cindy Lauper, or if they just want to
KILL ALL THE BOYAGER CREW!
HeavenofMine was fiddling with buttons in astrometrics, she pretended to look at the
screen and seem interested, however on closer inspection the screen was displayinga
a loop of random images. Cpt Janeday entered, with a new goth look.
Heaven: Captain?
Janeday: The shows writers decided my hair was the same style for too long,
and it was either ginger or this.
Heaven: I see, the obvious choice.
Janeday: So how are those scans comming along? Are we near the uhh....what do you call
it again, uhm...Britney...no...what was that....
Heaven smacked janeway on the head, making her gasp and fall over
Heaven: Jesus christ you stupid bitch, the ALPHA QUADRANT. Its the fucking ALPHA QUADRANT
You dumbass whoore.
Janeday slowly stood up, placing her hair back into a perfect style and primping her
uniform.
Janeday: Yes, thats it. are we near the BALPHIC QUADRANT yet?
Heaven shook her head as her eyes went on fire
Heaven: Being a captain must be easy.
Janeday: Hmm, im out of coffee, is there a coffee machine in here?
Heaven: ARGGGGGGGH GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE YOU IRRITATING MANLY LESBIAN!
Janeday: (in varsity cheerleader style) K
With that Janeday left astrometrics, she skipped along the corridor singing
old Britney Spears songs. Two ensigns stood in the corridor.
Ensign1: Why wont they give me a name yet!?
Ensign2: Deal with it.
Ensign1: Oh jesus christ, here she comes.
Ensign2: Quick look busy, she wont disturb you then.
Janeday gleefully skipped pasted and fell into the turbolift, standing up with her
hair in perfect place.
Janeday: Computer, report.
Computer: Leave me alone, its my only day off, i just give and give and give, and
my only day with the doctor results in you irritating me! Leave me alone, i
cant take it any more.
Janeday: K...Now report.
Computer: Commander Chakotayayay is harrasing heavenofmine in astrometrics.
=/\=Chakotayayay to computer/janeway=/\=
Chakotayayay:Come on baby, dont be like that, ive always got time for you.
Computer: You just arent fufilling me needs any more, the doctor can take
me where i wanna bee.
Janeday: Ewwww. Enough.
Janeday arrived on the bridge and sat on her chair, and the sound of a whoppee cushion
could be heard on the bridge
Karry Him began laughing histerically at the gag, hes pale face draining as though
he was having an asthma attack.
Janeday: Shut Up you annoying little man.
Karrys face drooped. He started crying.
Karry: My mommy said your a mean bitch.
Janeday: Thats It,
Janeday pulled a little revolver from her pocket and shot karry on the head, the whole
bridge pulled party streamers and began to applaud
Janeday: I cant believe the wrote out Bes instead of Him.
With that Bes beamed onto the bridge
Bes: Im back! The writers wrote me in again, and tomorrow weve got a lesbian love scene
with seven! But for now, im givng you another plant, here you go captain, heres a plant
take my plant, its such a pretty plant, i know you like plants, so i grew this plant
just for you, have my plant, here take it.
Janeday looked horrified by a plant loving Bes.
Janeday: Uhm, thanks,
Janeday pressed a button and flung the plant out an airlock.
Bes began crying histerically and bit of one of janedays hands.
Janeday: Ow.
Bes ran off the bridge as Chakotayayay, Belanna, Doc, and Heaven all arrived.
Rom Harrass: Gooooood Morning sleeeeeeepy heaaaa......
All: Shut the Fuck Up!
Belanna dragged herself about, smacking ensigns randomly on the head.
Heaven walked up to Janeday.
Heaven: Captain, due to the lack of my presence in the last Bar Preck: Boyager,
ratings fell around 99%, only Bill Clinton watched because he has a fetish for
Klingons.
Janeday: Well thats a bitch aint it?
Heaven: Well the writers insist on me bending over alot on the bridge for now
i will pretend i am fixing a console.
Janeday: Hmm Yes, im thinking of getting my nose pierced.
Tuvok: That is not advisable, your nose may become septic, and you may talk more like
mickey mouse than usual.
Janeday: Get a real job
Tuvok: Im a male jigallo in 45 states in USA.
Janeday: K......
Computer: I have killed commander chakotayayay.
Janeday: Oh well, how sad never mind.
Computer: He began recording a biography of his life in a tribe.
Janeday: Poor you. Ill arrange therapy.
Heaven: Captain, theres a borg cube just appeared out of no where and its transporting drones
onboard
Janeday: Yey! Pool party
What will happen, tune in for part three of Boyager to find out if the drones
really do want to dance and swim to Cindy Lauper, or if they just want to
KILL ALL THE BOYAGER CREW!