I do not own Harry Potter, the Wizarding World, or any canon characters.
Note: I have been in a more dour mood since I wrote Unwanted. I put on a random music mix and listened to this song and wanted to write something to try and break me out of it. I think it's good to remember that we don't always know what others are thinking, and we should try to be nice to others when we can. This is another songfic with a Harmony feel to it. Hopefully you'll find this enjoyable and introduce you to a good song that makes you feel. As always, thank you for reading and I wish you all the best.
-0-0-0-
Before You Go
Song: Before You Go by Lewis Capaldi
"MURDER! MURDER IN THE BATHROOM! MURDER!"
Severus Snape started to run the moment he heard the screams. His cloak billowed out behind him and his feet pounded the stone beneath him as he ran. He recognized the screamer, Moaning Myrtle, and knew she haunted the girls' lavatory. While she was morose and depressing, even for a ghost, he had never heard her scream quite like that before.
He flicked his wand out and pushed the door open. His eyes widened as he saw the scene before him. Draco Malfoy stood over Harry Potter. Draco, pale to begin with, looked as white as a corpse. Harry looked like a corpse as well, or soon to be one. He lay in pooling water, unmoving, eyes opened wide and staring. Blood trickled out of his mouth and he looked deathly still.
"Draco," Snape gasped, "What have you done?"
-0-
I fell by the wayside, like everyone else.
I hate you, I hate, you I hate you,
But I was just kidding myself.
Our every moment, I start to replace,
'Cause now that they're gone
All I hear are the words that I needed to say.
Hermione Granger looked up and down the table. "I wonder where he is?" she said softly.
"He's fine, probably running around the castle looking for Malfoy," Ronald Weasley said. "I wish he'd give up on that line of thinking. There's no way Malfoy's up to anything. It's second year all over again."
She hummed softly. "I suppose," she said. "Still, he shouldn't miss a meal over it."
"He'll be alright," Ron said. "We'll find him later in the common room and he'll talk about how sure he is that Malfoy's up to something and we'll humor him like we've been doing all year."
"That does seem likely," she said, still sounding faintly worried. She managed to suppress the worry for a moment as she started to eat. However, when Minerva McGonagall came walking up to her, the worry returned in full force. "Professor? What's wrong?"
McGonagall looked very distressed, her hands shaking slightly. "Miss Granger, you and Mister Weasley should come with me."
"I didn't do it," Ron said automatically.
"Now is not the time," McGonagall said. Hermione and Ron looked at each other, concern growing. The girl had never seen their Head of House act like this, sound like this. "Follow me," she said and walked away.
Hermione and Ron hurried to follow and the rest of the Gryffindors looked on, surprised. They followed her out of the Great Hall and down the hall.
Ron froze for a moment. "Oh no."
Hermione's heart started to beat faster. "What?"
"I was…I was trying to remember the last time I saw her like this."
"You've seen her like this? I never have."
"You wouldn't have." Ron paled. "It was when she came to us when they found you petrified."
Hermione's heart beat even faster. "Oh. OH." She started to run, outpacing Ron and running past McGonagall. She ignored their shouts, Ron telling her to wait and McGonagall telling her to stop. She ran to the doors of the Infirmary and threw them open.
Hermione's heart stopped.
Harry lay on the bed, a sight that was not completely foreign to her. She had seen him injured more often than not, seen him recovering on a hospital bed more times than she cared to recall. Each time she was filled with worry, worry that was soothed by Madam Pomfrey the school Matron. Then irritation would replace the worry, especially if the injury was Quidditch related.
The look on Pomfrey's face, and she noticed that Snape and Albus Dumbledore were there as well, and the looks on their faces did the opposite of soothe.
"H-Harry?" Hermione stumbled to his bedside. She had never seen him like this. He looked worse than the time he was nearly Kissed by the Dementors or when he was recovering after being abducted during the Tri-Wizard Tournament. He looked worse than all the other times she had seen him in the hospital wing. "W-What happened to you? Harry? Please, please tell me."
"Miss Granger," Dumbledore started to speak.
"Harry?" She reached out to take his hand and she gasped at how cold it was, how lifeless he felt. "What happened?!"
Ron arrived and gasped when he saw Harry. McGonagall closed the doors behind them and joined them at Harry's bedside, her face a rictus of pain.
"Miss Granger-" Dumbledore began again.
"What happened?!" Hermione shrieked.
"There was an incident in the girls' lavatory," Snape said. He looked down at Harry and at no one else, his face devoid of expression. "Mister Malfoy Cursed him."
Hermione and Ron gaped.
"What did that git do?" Ron asked.
Snape said nothing.
"The Cruciatus," Pomfrey said at last.
Ron groaned and Hermione started to cry. "W-Will he be okay?" she asked, tears running down her cheeks.
"I have no idea," Pomfrey confessed. "I have no idea how long he was subjected to the Curse. He apparently struck his head when he was suffering from it. His body is filled with dark magic and his skull was cracked."
"You can heal that, can't you?!" Hermione nearly shouted.
"And I did but he has not woken yet and…" Pomfrey sniffled. "I am not sure if he will. His brain was injured when he hit his head and…there's so much damage that I tried to heal but I…I simply do not know if he will wake." She wiped away her own tears.
"Where is he?" Ron growled.
"Secured in a dungeon room," Snape said. "Without his wand and under guard."
"And is he just going to get away with it?!"
"No, the guilt is irrefutable," Dumbledore sighed. "The Department of Magical Law Enforcement has been contacted. Aurors are already on their way."
"Harry…Harry was sure Draco was up to something," Hermione said bitterly. She rubbed Harry's hand with her own, trying to instill some life into it, trying to obtain a response. "We didn't believe him. Why didn't we believe him?"
Dumbledore sighed once more. "We were aware that Mister Malfoy was…up to something."
"You were?!" Ron and Hermione exclaimed.
"Yes, but this incident was more of an…unexpected thing. Myrtle informed us that Harry happened upon Draco in the lavatory. They started dueling and Malfoy cast the Curse." Dumbledore looked positively ancient and exhausted. "I never would have foreseen this."
"But if you knew, why didn't you take any more precautions?!" McGonagall asked incredulously.
"I…I miscalculated," Dumbledore said quietly.
"And Harry paid the price of your miscalculations," Hermione said brokenly.
-0-
When you hurt under the surface,
Like troubled water running cold.
Well, time can heal, but this won't
Everyone knew by the next day that Harry was in a coma in the Medical Wing and that Draco had been arrested and taken away by Aurors. The majority of the students were shocked at the news. They never knew that Draco was capable of such a thing. Insults and Jinxes and Hexes were one thing, Curses were another, much less an Unforgivable.
The Slytherins were looked at with the deepest suspicion by the rest of the school and even the Slytherins themselves looked at one another with mistrust and latent fear. The rest of the school whispered and gossiped amongst themselves, wondering what happened in the lavatory. Outlandish rumors flew left and right. Everyone seemed to have an opinion on what happened.
Hermione sat apart from everyone, lost in her thoughts and memories. She blamed herself. She knew she was not the one that cast the Curse of course, but she felt that she should have done something, anything, to prevent this from happening. Perhaps if she had entertained his theories, listened to him more.
Which begged the question, why did she not listen to him?
She knew why. His success in Potions using that book. It had irritated her all year, knowing that he was using a modified textbook and doing better than her. She had been so mad at him for using the book and being rewarded for it.
How small and inconsequential it seemed now with him lying unresponsive in the hospital wing.
Then everything that had happened between her and Ron this year. True, that was not Harry's fault in the slightest, but it was something else that distracted her. With Harry trying to remain close friends with both her and Ron, she had spent more time apart from both of them. The times she and Harry had spent time together, it was spent on schoolwork mostly. True, she and Ron had somewhat made up recently, but it did not eliminate all the strife that had separated them for so long.
Her feelings were in turmoil and she now realized the one constant she relied upon most was not there. His absence made things feel that much more unstable and she felt herself slipping deeper into uncertainty and fear.
She tried to focus on their last conversation, what they talked about, what they did. She started to panic as she realized she was having trouble remembering. She grasped at the memories desperately, trying to contain them, to figure things out.
"Harry'll be fine," Ron said; however, he looked like he did not believe his own words. "He survived worse than this. He took on a dragon, mermaids, Umbridge, Death Eaters, You-Know-Who. He'll be up in no time. He always gets better."
Hermione said nothing.
"Right? Hermione?"
Hermione wished she could assuage Ron's fear. She even wanted to lie to him. Making him feel better would make her feel better. But this time, she just could not.
"I don't know," she said in a faint whisper.
"I don't think I've ever heard you say that you don't know something," Ron joked feebly. His weak smile died when he looked at her expression.
"I don't know," she repeated.
-0-
So, before you go.
Was there something I could've said,
To make your heart beat better?
If only I'd have known you had a storm to weather.
So, before you go.
Was there something I could've said,
To make it all stop hurting?
It kills me how your mind can make you feel so worthless.
So, before you go.
"Miss Granger."
"Yes?" Hermione looked up at Pomfrey.
"Perhaps it is best if you are not here so much."
Hermione narrowed her eyes. Ever since Harry was taken to the infirmary, she had come back every day. After classes she would sit at his bedside. On the weekend she did not leave except to eat and sleep, though she got little of either. "I am not being disruptive."
"I did not say you were." Pomfrey rubbed her eyes. "You are hurting yourself by being here every day. You blame yourself for this when we know that you are not to blame."
"I abandoned him, I left him when he needed me," Hermione said. "I didn't listen to him all year. I pushed him away because of a damn book and over my problems with Ron. If I didn't, he wouldn't be like this."
"You are not a seer. If I recall from Minerva, you have little patience for divination." Her joke fell of deaf ears. "You are not responsible for this."
"Are you barring me from being here?" Hermione asked quietly.
"I could," Pomfrey sighed. "But I think I would be inviting considerably more trouble if I did."
Silence settled over them.
"He did this for me," she whispered. "Second year."
Pomfrey looked sad. "Yes, yes he did."
"He didn't abandon me then."
"He also blamed himself which again, he was not responsible for your condition. Much like now."
"I hear what you are saying," Hermione said shortly.
"I know you hear me. I hope you listen too," Pomfrey said and walked away.
Hermione waited for Pomfrey to enter her office. She took Harry's hand in hers. "I'm so sorry Harry," she whispered. "Please, please wake up. I'll make it up to you, I swear. Please, please Harry." She squeezed his hand as hard as she could.
She felt nothing in her hands.
Her vision blurred and she continued to whisper, the words fading under the sound of falling tears.
-0-
Was never the right time, whenever you called.
Went little, by little, by little, until there was nothing at all.
Our every moment, I start to replay.
But all I can think about is seeing that look on your face.
"Hermione! Wake up!"
Hermione's eyes popped open and her breathing was ragged, coming in fits and gasps. She shook, realizing that someone was holding her down. She struggled for a moment, her brain catching up. "Wha-what?! Let me go!"
"Hermione! It's just us!" Lavender Brown and Parvati Patil held onto her arms, waiting for her to calm down.
"Oh! Oh, oh sorry," Hermione said, still breathing hard. She went limp and only then did her two dormmates let go.
"You got an arm on you," Lavender said wryly, rubbing her cheek.
"I'm so sorry," Hermione winced. "I have some bruise cream in my trunk."
"Oh thanks." Lavender took the tin from her and rubbed the cream into her skin. "Why do you have this?"
"I had a problem with a Wheeze over the summer. One of their things gave me a black eye that wouldn't go away." She smiled softly at the memory. It was much funnier in hindsight. Then she remembered how Harry said she looked like a panda and her smile died. She rubbed her eyes.
"You were having a nightmare," Lavender said when Hermione looked at her. "All of a sudden you started screaming bloody murder and it took a bit for me and Parvati to wake you up."
"We were about to start conjuring water," Parvati said.
"I'm sorry," Hermione said.
"Do you want to talk about it?" Lavender asked gently.
"It's nothing," Hermione said.
"It's not nothing. You sounded really bad." Parvati wrung her hands a little. "Like…genuinely terrified. You…" she and Lavender shared a look, "you were screaming Harry's name."
Hermione's shoulders shook as the tears flowed.
The girls sat on either side of her and Parvati gently hugged her.
Hermione dissolved at her touch. "I was in the castle and I was looking for him and couldn't find him," she sobbed. "I was running around and when I found him, he was just out of reach. I tried to get him, to bring him back but he kept fading away. I couldn't reach him."
She buried her face into her hands. "I was trying to get to him. I didn't want him to leave. I don't want him to go…"
"Harry's still here," Parvati said. "Right? He's having the best care with Madam Pomfrey. He's still here. He's tough."
"He's not as tough as people think!" Hermione wailed. "He's gone through so much and he's always struggling. He's had to endure so much alone and I pushed him away this year and for what?! For nothing! He's my best friend and I abandoned him!" She stiffened when Lavender wrapped her arms around her.
Faced with unrelenting kindness, Hermione sobbed into Lavender's shoulder. Lavender held her as Hermione cried, becoming undone. Parvati rubbed her back and the girls said nothing, helping Hermione let go.
"Why are you being so nice to me?" Hermione sniffed at Lavender. "After how terribly I treated you?"
"Because you need kindness right now," Lavender said softly. "Everything that happened between us, well, that doesn't matter right now. This is something else and I'd never want you to feel like this. Us fighting over a boy is one thing. You've been torturing yourself over this Hermione and it isn't right. The person that actually did this got caught and punished. Don't punish yourself. Harry wouldn't want it, would he?"
"How can you ask that?!" Hermione cried indignantly.
"Because I don't know him as well. From what I do know, he wouldn't. But you're his best friend and you know him best. What would he say?"
Hermione looked down. "He wouldn't want me acting like it was my fault," she admitted.
"Then you should listen," Parvati said gently. "We're worried about you. You barely eat or rest. We know you haven't been sleeping well before tonight."
Hermione continued to cry. "I keep seeing his face. All the times he wanted to talk this year and I ignored him. All the times I got mad at him over stupid things. How he was so patient with me and how horrible I've been."
"You're really beating yourself up," Lavender said.
"Obviously," Hermione said snarkily and the other two girls chuckled.
"Harry means a lot to you," Parvati observed.
"Obviously," Hermione said wistfully.
"Is that why you're beating yourself up so hard?" Lavender asked gently. "Maybe you didn't know how much he meant to you before this."
"You…you might be right," Hermione finally said. She had inklings before, thoughts she pushed to the wayside when she could. The realization now, coming from Lavender no less, after all they have gone through, made it that much more impactful. She tried to struggle out of Lavender's arms, secretly thankful when Lavender did not let her go. "I'm so sorry," she said instead.
"It's okay," Lavender said with a small sad smile. "I think we all learned a lot from what's happened this year."
Hermione nodded and she closed her eyes. "Thank you," she whispered.
"Of course." She rubbed Hermione's back gently. "Maybe you can think of the ways you can make it up to him," Lavender suggested softly. "For when he wakes up."
Hermione looked at her. "When he wakes up?"
"Yeah. When he wakes up," Parvati said, nodding.
"Yes, when he wakes up," Hermione said finally.
If he wakes up, a tiny hateful voice in her mind said.
-0-
When you hurt under the surface,
Like troubled water running cold.
Well, time can heal, but this won't.
"Glad to see you out of the infirmary," Ginny Weasley remarked.
Hermione made a non-committal noise, not looking up from the book.
"Yeah, seeing you here in the library is normal," Ron said in what he thought was a light and teasing tone. The siblings looked at each other when Hermione did not rise to the words, continuing to page through the book. "Something interesting?"
"It's a medical book about head injuries." Hermione narrowed her eyes at it. "I'm hardly an expert but my parents sent it to me and I'm cross-referencing it against healing books. Seeing if I can find something that might work."
"Hermione, you're not a healer," Ron said slowly.
"I'm well aware of that," she replied frostily.
"Then shouldn't you be leaving this up to the experts?" Ginny asked in what she hoped was a kind tone.
"If the experts knew what they were doing, then Harry wouldn't be in the infirmary right now," Hermione said, eyes flashing. She still had not forgiven Dumbledore or Snape for their confession. Nor the fact that they spent a vast amount of the time out of the castle. They should have tried to help fine more ways to heal Harry and she found their lack of aid galling and typical.
"You have to stop this," Ron said. "I want Harry back as much as you do but you're running yourself ragged."
"No, you don't," she said shortly. "And I'm not saying that to have a go at you. I'm saying I need Harry back."
"Need?" the siblings said together.
"Yes. I need him back. He's my best friend."
"I know what it's like," Ginny said softly. She colored at the looks from Hermione and Ron. "You feel responsible for what happened. You feel like you could've done more, or done something different to prevent it." She shuddered softly and Ron put an arm around her shoulders.
Hermione looked away. "Something like that."
"Thinking like that isn't going to do anything for you," Ginny whispered. "Nothing good anyways."
"I know and…thank you for saying so. I appreciate it." Hermione shook her head. "But I have to do this. I'll never forgive myself if I don't. I already have done so much to Harry that needs fixing. I have to do this."
"Are…are you doing this to make it up to him?" Ron asked. He flinched at Hermione's glare but pushed on. "When you say you need him back, do you need him back to make things right?"
Hermione closed her book and rose from the table, pushing her things into her bag. "I need him back because I need him back, need him here. Whether or not he forgives me for what I've done…" she swallowed thickly, "is moot as long as he is in a position to make that decision." She got up and left, ignoring their calls to her.
It'll be okay if he doesn't forgive me, she thought as she ran from the library, because if he never wakes up, I'll never forgive myself. It'll be the same no matter what. At least he will be here.
-0-
So, before you go.
Was there something I could've said,
To make your heart beat better?
If only I'd have known you had a storm to weather.
So, before you go.
Was there something I could've said,
To make it all stop hurting?
It kills me how your mind can make you feel so worthless.
So, before you go.
The Lake shimmered in the afternoon sunlight, the sound of the waves lapping against the shore filling the air. It was idyllic, picturesque.
"You never know what you took for granted until it's gone," Harry remarked. He sat on the broad flat rock, soaking in the warmth.
"It's important to try and take the time to enjoy the present," Hermione agreed.
Harry smiled. "We're bad at that, aren't we?"
Hermione sighed. "We are. At least we're doing it now though." She felt a bit odd; something was off.
The sun dipped below the horizon, sinking oddly fast. Shadows grew a little faster, starting to surround them in tendrils of night. "Yeah, too bad we didn't do it enough when it mattered," Harry said, a note of sadness in his voice.
"Harry?"
He looked at her and his smile did not quite reach his eyes. "Thank you for everything Hermione. You were a great friend when I needed one, when I didn't deserve one."
"Don't be ridiculous. You always deserved it and…I wasn't the best one all the time."
"Neither was, but thanks for sticking with me. It meant more than you know."
"H-Harry?" Things were dark now and Harry began to fade from her sight.
"Goodbye Hermione," he said, leaving her alone in the dark.
"HARRY!"
Hermione sat up in bed, still screaming his name. For a moment she looked around, heart pounding. Ever since the night Lavender and Parvati woke her up, well she woke them up first technically, she cast a silencing charm on her curtains so she would not wake them again. The charm blocked her screams and she sat there, breathing heavily.
The nightmare still clung to her and she knew sleep would not return soon, if it did that night.
She got out of bed and pulled robes over her nightclothes. She opened her trunk and felt about inside, finding what she was looking for. Grabbing her wand she left the room, taking care to be as quiet as possible. Once she got into the common room, she flung the invisibility cloak over herself and gently pushed the portrait door open, somehow not waking the Fat Lady on the other side.
A few days after the incident, Hermione had snuck into the boys' dorm and taken Harry's cloak from his trunk. She was having a bad day and she had the idea that the cloak would help her feel better somehow. A part of her found it incredibly embarrassing, like a child with a security blanket. It would have been more embarrassing if it did not work. She felt better when she held it. It was something that was a part of Harry, something that was his.
When she had it, she felt a measure of comfort. The memories of them using the cloak flooded her, warmed her. She felt like he was with her. While she could feel it, he was still there. She shivered as she walked towards the infirmary. A part of her wondered if it was because the cloak felt less like him at this moment. She knew that did not make any sense. That thinking the cloak felt like him was a fanciful and emotional thought. She also logically knew that the shiver was most likely because it was cold walking through the castle at night.
That did not stop her from speeding up, from slipping into the infirmary, from breathing a sigh of relief seeing Harry lying on the bed.
She sat beside him, took his hand once more. His hand was still cold but there was the faintest sensation of warmth there. A very light pulse could be felt in his wrist, light but there. She pressed his hand to her lips.
"Please Harry," she whispered into his hand. "I'm so sorry. Please, come back. I need you. I want you with me. I want to make things right. Please."
She whispered the words again and again, as steady as a mantra, and as sleep took her once more, the words were on her lips and her cheek rested on his hand.
-0-
Would we be better off by now,
If I'd let my walls come down?
Maybe, I guess we'll never know,
You know, you know.
"Hermione?"
She grunted, swiping irritably at the voice. Someone was always trying to wake her up these days. Why could they not let her sleep? She got precious little as it was.
"Hermione, are you okay?" Harry asked.
"'m okay," she said, trying to ignore him. Then she realized what was going on and her eyes snapped open. "Harry?!"
Harry leapt back, heart to his chest. "Blimey Hermione! What's wrong?!"
She clambered to her feet and hugged him tight, weeping at how he felt in her arms. He felt like he should have and she wept harder when he hugged her back. "Oh Harry! You're okay!" She looked up at him. "Are you? Okay?"
"I…I don't know," he said sheepishly. "I…think something happened to me."
Hermione looked around. They were not in the infirmary. In fact, she had no idea where they were. It looked like a quiet little village, charming and quaint. "Where are we?" she asked.
"Godric's Hollow apparently."
"Really?"
"At least that's what I was told."
She stared at him. "Who told you?"
He smiled once more, shy and embarrassed and pleased all in one. "This is going to sound crazy, but my Mum and Dad."
She stared at him for longer. "Harry…"
"I know, they're…dead. And uh…that's why I think something happened to me. My memories from what happened right before here are a bit hazy."
"You…you were hurt, very badly," Hermione sniffled. "Draco cast the Cruciatus on you and you hurt your head and your brain."
"I knew he was up to something," Harry said, vindicated. "Well, I mean, I didn't know he was going to do that but I knew."
"You were right. Harry, I'm so sorry for not believing you when you said something all those times. And I'm so sorry for fighting with you about the potions book."
"I know, I've heard you say so, many times." His expression turned soft. "You've been really tearing yourself up over it, haven't you?"
"It's all my fault! If I listened, if I didn't take the potions book personally, if I didn't resent you for trying to maintain your friendship with Ron during our…difficulties, this wouldn't have happened!"
"You don't know that," Harry said gently. "Things still could have turned out this way."
"We don't know they wouldn't have," she retorted.
"That's fair I suppose." He sighed. "It hurt, I won't lie. I wish we talked more about it while it was happening but I didn't try to talk about it with you either so, you're not completely to blame." He looked at her critically. "Please don't be mad when I say this, but you don't look so good."
She laughed and she could not remember the last time she did. "As indelicately delicate as always. It really is you. Unless, this is another awful dream of mine. But I've never been here before. How's this even happening?"
"Magic." Harry snickered when she pinched him. "No seriously, at least that's what Mum and Dad said. They said with everything that happened to me, I'm sort of in between."
"In between?"
"Life and death," Harry said softly. He hugged her when she whimpered. "That's how we've been talking. It's been wonderful, which is weird to say but it's true, talking to them like this. I've learned a lot and I finally have an idea of who they were, are."
He did look truly happy and Hermione's heart ached. "That's wonderful. It makes no sense but magic doesn't make much sense either."
"That's what Mum said," Harry smiled. "I…I guess I've been a little cut off from things and I could sometimes hear you and the others. That's how I know you've apologized a lot. But tonight, I could actually find you and connect with you when I couldn't before. Mum and Dad said something would help bridge the divide, whatever that means, and well, that's how we are here now."
"I wonder what," she mused. "Do…can I meet your parents?"
"I asked them that and they do want to, properly that is. Apparently, they can sort of see what I do, which is a little creepy but nice, and Mum loves you, but you can't because you're not how I am now." He frowned slightly. "They said, I have to make a choice now."
"A choice?" she asked, voice quavering.
"This place, the between won't last much longer. I have to decide if I want to move on with them, or try to go back."
Her heart stopped. "Oh. I…I can see the appeal of you wanting to move on with them." Her tears fell once more. "You always wanted to be with them."
"I do," he admitted. He wiped her tears away. "They said I have something special though. A second chance. Not everyone gets one. They didn't." He looked mournful. "Sirius didn't."
She hugged him, not trusting herself to speak out loud.
"They said I had a second chance to go back and do more, to live properly." A faint smile appeared. "They said it'd be hard though."
She snorted through her tears. "They should know you do everything the hard way."
"They do know that." Their laughter mingled.
"What do they want for you?" she asked quietly.
"They wouldn't tell me," he huffed softly. "That they just want me to be happy and support me no matter what." He looked down at her, his green eyes seeking out her brown ones. "What do you want?"
"Don't ask me that," she said, stricken. "It'll be terrible and selfish."
"I've always cared what you wanted," he said gently. "The Hermione I know and like never shied away from making her opinion known."
She smiled unwillingly. "I…I want you to be happy."
He snorted. "That's cheating, saying what they said."
"Doesn't make it any less true," she argued. "But…if my opinion means anything, I want you to come back with me. I have so much to make up for, so much I need to account for. I…I finally realized just how much you mean to me and if…if you come back," her tears fell heavily, "I swear I'll do right by you. I will make sure to earn the second chance I've been given."
"You…you've done so much for me already," he said quietly.
"Maybe, but there's more that I want to do for you, with you." She reached up and pulled him down. She pressed her lips against his, not thinking about this was the first and possibly the last kiss she would ever share with him. She closed her eyes as she seared the moment into her memories, if they still worked that way here.
"But at least I got to say goodbye and say I'm sorry if you don't come back," she whispered when she finally broke apart.
Harry looked dazed for a moment, a hand coming up to touch his lips. Then his eyes focused on her and he rested his hand on her cheek. "Thank you," he said at last. "I…I think I understand. Just, do something for me?"
"Anything."
"You have to wake up."
"No, no! Please, anything but that!"
"It'll be okay Hermione. You have to wake up."
"Harry!" she screamed as everything faded from sight and she felt something be pulled from her.
-0-
So, before you go.
Was there something I could've said,
To make your heart beat better?
If only I'd have known you had a storm to weather.
"Wake up Miss Granger."
Hermione growled as she woke, eyes narrowed in frustration.
"I am not intimidated in the slightest," Pomfrey said, unimpressed. She stood over Hermione and frowned down at her, holding the invisibility cloak in her hand. "I have half a mind to go to Minerva right now and let me tell you, she does not like to be woken by others."
Hermione groaned, realizing where she was. She was back in the infirmary and her neck and back were stiff. She had fallen asleep by Harry's bedside with the invisibility cloak over her. Her brain, muddled by sleep and her dream, was having difficulty waking up with the rest of her. She sat up groaning, rubbing her back with one hand and resting her other on the hand her face was lying on.
"You nearly gave me a heart attack," Pomfrey scolded. "I come out to check on Mister Potter and my heart stopped when I saw that his lower arm and hand and half of his lower body was missing! I tried to cast some spells and my magic was acting strange in the missing areas before I realized it was an invisibility cloak. Then I pull it off and here you are! Honestly Miss Granger, I know how deeply you care for Mister Potter but this is beyond the limit!"
"I'm sorry," Hermione said, face red. "I had a nightmare and had to come see him. I thought...I thought he was saying goodbye."
Pomfrey sniffled, her irritation melting away. "Well, if you help me clean up some this morning and assist me a little, then we can forget about going to Minerva right now. She's no kinder to the one waking her than she is to the reason she is woken."
Hermione nodded, grateful for the reprieve, and rose slowly. She took a few steps before her momentum was arrested. She looked down at the reason and froze. "M-M-Madam Pomfrey?" Her voice shook badly as she spoke.
"Caught a chill have you? You could have at least laid in bed with Mister Potter and used the covers properly." She rolled her eyes. "And if you ever tell anyone I said that, I will deny it."
"What?! No! I mean, just look!" Hermione squeaked shrilly.
Pomfrey looked down and gasped. Harry's hand was clasped around Hermione's, his fingers threaded through hers. Her eyes widened when Hermione relaxed her fingers and Harry tightened his.
Harry groaned softly. A faint sound just barely audible, but was heard by them both.
"You heard that too, yes?" Pomfrey's voice shook almost as much as Hermione's.
"H-H-Harry?" Hermione asked faintly.
"Hermione?" he responded, eyes opening slowly.
Pomfrey waved her wand and a chair came skidding over, catching her neatly as her knees buckled. "I just need a moment," she gasped as Hermione looked at her with alarm. "Mister Potter! How are you feeling? Do you know where you are?"
"I hope I'm in the infirmary if you're here," he said weakly.
Pomfrey laughed for the first time in a long time while Hermione huffed and smiled and cried. "Oh I have missed your sass and if you tell the others I said that, I will deny it. It is good to see you awake, Harry."
Harry's smile was small but there. "Good to be awake," he said.
-0-
So, before you go.
Was there something I could've said,
To make it all stop hurting?
It kills me how your mind can make you feel so worthless.
So, before you go.
Harry's awakening caused a lot of things to happen at once.
Harry spoke with Dumbledore and Snape and Harry had learned a few things from James and Lily, things Dumbledore confirmed. The incident had galvanized Dumbledore in a way that nothing else had before. In the weeks that Harry lay in the coma, he had gone out and done a lot with the assistance of Snape and Alastor Moody among others.
Their actions seemed to panic Voldemort and while a war still came, it ended with Voldemort being firmly defeated and finished for good. People still died, but the loss of life was a lot lighter than what could have happened. Dumbledore lived long enough to see things be put to rest before he followed after, claimed by a curse but he went to his rest in peace.
It took a long time for Harry to recover, physically and magically. He approached rehabilitation with his usual grit and only a little reluctance and whinging. Hermione's aide definitely helped keep the latter attitude down. She was there the entire time, helping Harry with cheerful encouragement or cheerful prodding which in many ways were one and the same.
Harry fell back, sweating and exhausted. "Can we take a break?" he gasped.
"We've barely done much spellwork," Hermione protested. She snorted at his pleading look. "I suppose a small break," she conceded and sat down beside him.
"Thanks," he smiled wearily. "I can't believe I used to find these things easy before. It's so difficult now."
"You're doing wonderfully," she said. "You were severely hurt and out of commission for a long time. It's extraordinary that you are coming along this well honestly."
"You think I'm extraordinary?" he asked, preening a little.
She snorted and flicked his nose gently. "Maybe a little."
"I'll take it." He looked up at her. "Thank you for doing all this with me."
"Of course," she said. "I told you I'm with you every step of the way." She looked off in the distance. "Besides, I said I wouldn't waste this second chance we got."
He reached out for her hand and she gratefully took his, their fingers entwining. "I really appreciate it," he said huskily, "and you of course."
"Of course," she repeated. She smiled when he brought her hand to his lips.
"And you've more than made up for whatever you thought you did," he said to her fingers.
"Not everything," she disagreed.
"Don't hurt yourself for me," he pleaded, pressing his lips to the palm of her hand. "I can tell you're still punishing yourself."
She leaned over him, pressing her forehead to his. "I…I just…I think about what if I lost you and all I couldn't do and say anymore and it scares me so much." Her tears fell like warm rain, splashing onto his face.
He held her in his arms, relishing her warmth and presence. "I chose to come back," he said. "I heard you and came back. I'm here with you." He kissed her cheeks, her forehead, her lips.
"Thank you," she breathed out against his lips. "Thank you for hearing and listening," she whispered desperately. "Thank you for hearing what I needed to say."
"I know it doesn't always look it, but I do listen to you." He chuckled when she poked him. "I think that's a nice break. Shall we get back to it?"
"Yes," she said, smiling and wiping her eyes.
They worked a while longer before Harry needed another break. He laid there, panting heavily from the exertion. "I'm sorry," he said belatedly. "What was that?"
"I thought you do listen to me," she smiled.
"I forgot to say usually," he smiled back.
She snorted. "I said, thank you for not…saying 'I told you so' a lot. With…you know, everything."
"I'll admit I am a bit tempted here and there," he said lightly. "But it's not that important now, is it?"
"That and you know you'd be lacking in snogging if you were annoying about it," Hermione said.
"Also true," he agreed readily. "That was part of the reason why I came back you know."
"Oh? I'm that good of a kisser?" she asked, her voice husky and smoldering.
"That and if you were brave enough to tell me all that but letting me make the final decision, even if it wasn't one you wanted, I could be brave and come back too," he said softly.
"You barely ever had the chance to make a decision before," she murmured. "I…I'd hate forcing you to do something, even if I wanted it. I learned from my mistake when I did that to you before."
He held her close. "You should know, it wasn't a hard decision to make."
"It wasn't?"
"No. I…just needed a reason to come back. Turns out there was still something for me here before I went." He brushed a lock of bushy brown hair from her face.
"Something?" she repeated, her smile obliterating her frown.
"Someone," he corrected himself with a laugh. "Thank you for giving me that reason and being that someone."
She kissed him again. "Thank you for listening," she whispered.
Fin