Disclaimer: You recognise it, I don't own it. See prologue for details.
Many thanks to Irina and Gamine for nit spotting.
While this whole story is R rated, this is one of the chapters that earned it that rating.
Please offer feedback -- it tells me how I'm doing...
~*~
Chapter 8 -- Hallucination
Eric found himself standing at the back of the Silver Guardians' auditorium. That he had no knowledge of how he came to be there, or what he'd been doing before finding himself there was faintly worrying, but the familiar setting allayed that.
The hall was filled with every Silver Guardian -- or at least it looked that way, and Eric wasn't going to do a head count to prove or disprove the theory. Up on the platform was Mr Collins -- nothing strange about that and yet...
"You are gathered here today," Collins was saying, "in order for me to relay to you some extremely bad news."
It dawned on Eric that Wes and Jen didn't appear to be present. Had something happened to them? And if that was the case, why hadn't he been told? Why was he hearing this with everyone else?
"It is my sad duty to relay to you the news that we have lost a commander, a colleague -- a friend."
Something's happened to Wes? No! Not to Jen -- this isn't fair.
"Eric Myers..."
"What?!"
Eric hadn't intended to exclaim out loud, but it happened anyway. He expected people to look round but no-one moved. Collins didn't even so much as break step in his carefully worked out speech.
"I'm not dead!" Eric turned to the guardian he was standing next to. "I'm here!" But the man beside him didn't so much as blink.
He reached out to shake the man's shoulders...and found his hand passing through the other guardian -- as if the other guardian wasn't there. Or he wasn't.
"I'm not dead..." But Eric's conviction was shaken. He stared at his hands in vague horror. What was happening to him?
"Oh but you are," put in a voice just to his left. He spun round to see bel Abis standing next to him. Eric went to lunge for the smiling man only to find himself restrained by something.
"What do you mean?" Eric hissed.
bel Abis' smile widened a little. "You are dead -- as far as they are concerned." bel Abis laughed. "You have been dead to them from the moment that you left their sight."
"You're lying!"
"You doubt me?" bel Abis enquired. "Let me show you how you are mourned."
Before Eric could do or say anything, bel Abis clapped his hands together and the scene changed. Gone was the auditorium and the ranks of Silver Guardians, and instead, Eric found himself standing on Maple Street, outside Kimberly's house. Kimberly was in the front yard, tending to the plants there.
"Kim..." Eric took a step forward.
Suddenly, the door of Kimberly's house opened and out bounced Alice.
"Daddy!" she yelled, running forwards.
Eric watched as Kimberly looked up from her work, smiling at him with the same smile she had given him when he'd kissed her. Eric felt his heart swell at the sight as Alice ran towards him...only to feel it shatter as she ran beyond him. Eric turned to see her leap at a stranger.
A tall, handsome stranger with the sort of clear-cut features often found in the pages of magazines. The kind of man that Eric had always found himself coming second to in everything. Bile started to rise in the back of his throat.
"Daddy you're home!" she squealed.
The stranger laughed and swung her up into his arms. "I certainly am, darling."
Eric could only watch in numb shock and horror as the stranger carried Alice back towards the house. Kimberly all but jumped to her feet, brushing dirt from her hands, virtually running to greet the stranger and smiling at him.
"Good trip?" she asked.
"It was OK." The stranger set Alice down and drew Kimberly into an embrace. "But I missed you." The love was obvious in his voice and it was matched by the expression on Kimberly's face. As the stranger bent to kiss Kimberly, Eric felt the shards of his heart shatter.
"No..." he whispered, wanting to look away from the obviously happy couple but being unable to tear his gaze from them as they kissed.
"She didn't love you," bel Abis commented. "You were just...convenient."
"No..." Sadness mutated into anger and again Eric tried to lash out at the oily, smiling man beside him but again he found himself somehow restrained.
"Bastard," Eric hissed.
"You've just dictated where we go next." bel Abis clapped his hands again, and again the scene changed.
Eric looked about himself, puzzled. He didn't recognise this place; in fact he couldn't see much of it. Everything was grey and misty, the outlines of objects blurring before his eyes. He thought it might have been an office, but he wasn't sure.
The sound of a telephone ringing dragged Eric's attention to the 'desk' -- or what might be a desk, if this was an office.
"Yes?"
The voice that answered the call was a man's voice but no matter how hard Eric strained his eyes, he couldn't pierce the fog to make out any details about him.
"I see. You're sure about that?" There was a pause, then the speaker gave a sigh. "I see. Thank you."
Eric heard the receiver set back into its cradle.
"Well you always were a disappointment, Eric," the speaker muttered. "Now you're a dead disappointment." There was another sigh. "I'm glad I never bothered to get to know you."
The speaker slowly stood up. Eric heard the chair scrape against the floor, followed by footsteps. Suddenly a figure appeared out of the mist and Eric felt his knees turn to water. He could have been looking in a mirror. The man looked just like him, except older.
Eric felt gut-punched. He shook his head, trying to deny what he was looking at. "Nonono..."
"Oh yes," bel Abis replied. "Your father knew about you. Has known about you your whole life but..." bel Abis smirked. "You disappointed him."
Eric felt sick to his stomach. It had long been a sore spot that he didn't know his father and hearing that his father knew who he was but didn't get to know him...didn't want to know him...didn't even care. He wanted to fold into a foetal ball, as though that might somehow cure the pain but the same restraint that prevented him from attacking bel Abis prevented him from doing that. He was left standing, frozenly staring at his father.
Or where his father had been standing. He somehow missed the clap of bel Abis' hands that heralded another location change. Now they were standing in a very generic apartment that could have literally been anywhere.
I can't take this...
"Wes!"
Jen's voice pulled him from his brooding. Mr Collins had been delivering a nice eulogy...surely Wes and Jen would be at least remembering him fondly.
"Don't bet on that," bel Abis chuckled.
Looking round, Eric felt the bottom of his stomach drop out. Wes was holding a bottle of champagne and wearing a huge grin. It could be for any number of reasons, he tried to remind himself.
"No more whining, bitching loser," Wes exclaimed, popping the cork.
"Yes!" Jen agreed, producing two glasses. "We're finally rid of him."
"Nonononono they wouldn't DO THIS!" Eric knew the last part of his sentence was more howl than coherent speech -- he didn't care.
"Wouldn't they?" bel Abis retorted.
Suddenly everything was pitch black and Eric found himself alone. It took him a moment to realise that he was back, in the void, hanging by his wrists once more. It had been a hallucination. It was all a hallucination -- a product of his own mind.
"You coward!"
Kimberly was standing before him. Impossibly, he could see her. He shouldn't have been able to see her. It was pitch dark -- but there she was.
Hallucination, he tried to tell himself.
Then she slapped him. Hard.
"You fucking coward," she hissed. "You couldn't stay and face your problems like a real man, no you had to run away. Now look at you." She took a step closer. "You're fucked and you've taken Alice and me along for the ride."
"No..." Eric shook his head. They had got away. They had to have got away.
"And do you know what?" she continued, an ugly sneer marring her face. "You're pathetic."
For the second time Eric felt his heart fragment. "Kim...I..."
"Shut up you son of a bitch!" She slapped him again. "You dragged me into this shit...do you know what that twisted bastard is doing to me? Do you even care?" She got into his face. "Do you know what he's done to Alice?"
"No...no..."
"Shut up!" She slapped him a third time, fingernails scoring his cheek. "You fucking coward. You've cost me my daughter's life!"
"Kim... No!"
The scream shattered the hallucination and Eric found himself back in the void, alone once more, chest heaving.
"No more," he begged.
"Plenty more," said a fresh voice.
Gina Thomas and Ben Johnson loomed out of the darkness, closely followed by Hines and Foster.
"You lied to me," Gina stated, glaring angrily.
"To think I looked up to you," spat Foster. "You're nothing but a fucked up, cowardly asshole."
"His arrogance got Porter killed," said Ben. "And Carter and whoever else we lost before Ransik was defeated. You turned that fight into your own personal war."
"I didn't..."
"You did and you know it."
"You're mentally unstable," put in Hines. "You shouldn't have been left in charge of a box of doughnuts much less leading a group of real warriors into battle."
"You got me shot," chimed in a new voice and Franklin, the young Private who had been shot in the retreat from the Novask barn appeared to stand beside Hines. "I nearly died thanks to you."
"It was a flesh wound...I..."
Franklin stepped forward and leaned in until he was standing virtually nose-to-nose. "I got blood poisoning. All because you had to be a hero."
"I...no..." Eric swallowed. "I did my job."
"You fucked up," Foster retorted.
"I did my job."
"You fucked up," chanted Foster, Hines, Ben and Franklin.
"You're a sad fucked up bastard," said Gina.
"No...no..."
"Yes!"
"Noooooooooooooo!"
The scream reverberated off whatever the void had been built of, fracturing the hallucination into tiny shards and leaving him alone again, but not for long as footsteps started to echo in the void.
"Eric you promised me you'd be all right." Out of the darkness came Alice and with her was the slightly bigger form of Iliya, the little girl who had been caught up in the fire fight in Novask.
"You promised me you would help my mother," Iliya contributed, speaking in heavily accented English. "But you didn't."
"And you're not all right," Alice added. "You let them hurt you again."
"I..." But Eric had even less defence against Alice's accusations.
"And you let them hurt me," Alice continued. "The bad men hit me, Eric, and you let them," she accused. Looking up at him with a combination of sadness, regret and anger that made Eric's stomach knot up, she added, "I don't want you as a daddy -- you're as bad as my real daddy."
"Alice...no..."
"Da," Iliya agreed. "He is a..." She paused a moment, clearly hunting for a word. "A bastard."
Alice cocked her head, then nodded. "Yes he is."
"No..." Eric could feel tears beginning to roll down his checks. "Alice..."
"You let me down," Alice hissed. "You promised you'd be all right."
"You let me down," chimed in Iliya. "You promised you'd help my mother."
"You let me down." Gina joined the chorus. "You lied to me."
"You let me down." Ben's turn. "You got my friends killed."
"You let me down." Hines' voice joined the litany. "You're mentally disturbed."
"You let me down." Foster now. "I looked up to you but you're just a coward."
"You let me down." Kimberly. "You let bel Abis get me. You've let him hurt me and you've let him hurt Alice."
"No...stop...it's not true..."
"I hate you." Three words, spoken by everyone.
"Nonononononoooo..."
Light flared in the void. The hallucinations vanished in the glare but that was no comfort.
"Kleknuti!"
"NO!"
Eric could see the man advancing on him, cattle prod at the ready. He tried to move out of the way but there was nowhere to go. Nowhere he could move to. The cattle prod touched his stomach.
The man depressed the trigger and the hallucination exploded into darkness once more.
He was alone.
They hadn't returned.
It took a long while for his heart rate to slow.
But in that time there were no further hallucinations. No more accusations. Nothing. Just the blackness and the silence -- and for once, Eric felt that was the better end of the deal.
Then, into the absolute silence came a scaly rattle and a breathy, sibilant hiss.
Eric froze.
The sound was coming from above him.
He looked.
He could see the chains that the manacles were attached to...and could see the snakes that were slowly descending the chain, getting ever closer to his hands and arms.
It didn't matter that his throat was already raw from screaming; it didn't matter that he had virtually no voice left. There was no power that could stop Eric from screaming.
~*~
Zafar bel Abis leaned closer to the monitor.
He wished he could see what Myers was hallucinating -- whatever it was, it was certainly having a profound effect on the man. The screams were truly unearthly.
"Commander...sir..."
Without looking away, bel Abis answered, "If you do not have the stomach for this, Ishmal, you should not have signed on."
There was a loud swallow from the man standing behind him. "It's...um... He is here."
bel Abis blinked. "He is here?" he echoed. "What he would this be?"
"Aaron Lemont," stated a cold voice.
bel Abis spun round to find himself facing Aaron Lemont. "You're early."
"And you fucked up," Lemont snarled. "There were supposed to be no witnesses."
bel Abis waved a negligent hand. "They will not do anything."
"Won't they?" Lemont retorted, grabbing bel Abis by the shirtfront. "Cawdron and his two minions have gone AWOL. I can't prove it, but I know they've joined up with Peterson's operation."
"That is your problem, not mine. Peterson is your grudge."
"And you would be languishing in jail without my help. You owe me, bel Abis, and right now, Peterson's little operation is probably closer to figuring this out than either of us would like. I want to know what you're going to do about it."
Fastidiously, bel Abis detached Lemont's hands from his shirt. "I will do nothing if you retain this attitude. I have nothing to lose. You, on the other hand, have everything to lose." Lemont glared. "Peterson still does not know where this facility is. If you will allow me the courtesy of a little time to think, I will tell you what we will do."
"You'd better."
bel Abis smiled and turned back to the monitor. Myers was still under the influence of the hallucinogen. "Oh, trust me, General, I have no desire to languish in jail. I will think of a suitable plan of action."
~*~
Kimberly followed Hines and Foster into the Silver Guardians headquarters. It seemed strange to be here without Eric -- although, she realised, she hadn't actually been here before, with or without Eric.
"Where are Wes and Jen?" Rocky wondered.
"On holiday," stated Ben Johnson who was accompanying them through the headquarters. "They went on Monday."
"Oh." There didn't seem to be a lot more to say.
At that moment, the little party reached a door. Hines knocked.
"Come in."
"SNAFU," Foster murmured. "We're already SNAFU."
Hines just shot him a look that Kimberly interpreted as 'shut up', before opening the door and leading the group into the room. It proved to be a small conference room.
"Hines -- Foster, what happened?" asked one of the two occupants of the room.
"Colonel..."
But Kimberly paid Hines' explanations to Cawdron only cursory notice as her attention was dragged to the other man. He reminded her of someone. The shape of his face, the body language...but the colouring and build were 'wrong'. She couldn't place the familiarity at all.
"...I know we weren't followed to the pick-up point," Hines finished, "which leaves only one possibility."
Kimberly watched, stunned, as the man lifted his hand and pinched the bridge of his nose. "A mole," he groaned.
Kimberly knew that gesture. Knew that whole tone of voice and resigned posture. "Eric!" Suddenly she found herself the centre of attention. "Oops."
The man looked wryly amused. "I presume, ma'am, that was not intended to be a contribution to this discussion."
Kimberly found herself blushing.
"Hines, would you like to conduct some introductions here?" Cawdron asked. "Then you can tell me what in the blue hell two civilians are doing here in the first place."
Hines nodded. "This is Kimberly Cunningham -- Mr...err...Eric's neighbour -- and Rocky DeSantos..."
"Just call me moral support," Rocky put in, offering Cawdron a smile.
"Kim, Rocky, this is Colonel John Cawdron and Colonel Frank Peterson," Hines continued.
"Now we all know each other..." Cawdron began, looking meaningfully at Hines.
"Sir..."
"I want to help," Kimberly cut in.
"Why?" Cawdron asked. "From what Myers told me on the phone, you have a young daughter...of whom I see no sign."
"She's with my wife," Rocky put in.
Cawdron just looked expectantly at Kimberly. "Because...to be honest with you, Colonel, I owe Eric this. He is my friend...and I cannot just sit back and let this happen."
Cawdron sat back in his seat, arms folded impassively. "Frank -- this is your show."
Peterson sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose again. "Considering I've already got one semi-civilian on the team plus three AWOL Marines...I'm so far outside of protocol that two more civilians aren't going to make that much difference and," he added, looking at Kimberly and Rocky, "it will probably help to have at least one person on the team that E...the subject knows well enough to trust. Ma'am," he continued, "I'm guessing that would be you." Kimberly made no reply, sensing none was required. "Ladies, gentlemen -- please have a seat. Time is of the essence."
TO BE CONTINUED...