Author: Lucinda
rating: pg 13?
Main Characters: Willow, Graham
Disclaimer: I own nobody from Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
Distribution: Bite Me, please?, NHA, WWW, WillowGraham... anyone else, just ask.

Graham knew that he was wandering aimlessly. It didn't stop him, he was just rambling around the campus. He wasn't even thinking about it. He was thinking about what had happened in the lab. He had seen ADAM again. More importantly, ADAM had talked, mainly to Riley, but he'd been in the room as well.

But it had been even worse. ADAM had said things, horribly disturbing things. He'd said that Dr. Walsh had created him, that he'd been her experiment. That he hadn't been her only experiment. ADAM had said that Dr. Walsh had been experimenting on them, giving them pills and drugs to change them. He'd called Riley his brother because of those pills and drugs. He'd known how Dr. Walsh had evaluated them, how she had been constantly testing and watching them.

What made it worse was the fact that he knew it had been true. He'd noticed a few interesting affects of the 'vitamins' provided to them. Provided to Dr. Walsh's preferred team. He'd put them down to just a better blend, and had avoided thinking about it. But... there was no way that ADAM would have known. And the more Graham had thought about it, the more he'd been able to place some of the demon parts as coming from some of the demons that they'd captured.

She had grafted demon parts and electronics onto the body of one of the Initiative soldiers. She had been experimenting, operating and dissection the demons. Experimenting on them as well. Had they been nothing more than test subjects to her? What all had she done to them? Had she envisioned a whole unit of ADAM's? A whole group? Maybe even an army of hybrid cyborgs?

His thoughts were a mess. But, what could he do about them? He couldn't change what Dr. Walsh had done. He didn't even know how to get rid of ADAM or if Riley would recover from being speared with that bone spike. He wasn't even sure how he felt about everything. Before, he'd taken pride in doing so well, running a bit faster, lifting a bit more than the other soldiers. Had that been just because she had given him experimental drugs? Had she done something that had changed him? Was he more like ADAM than he thought?

"Hey there. Earth to Graham?"

Looking over, he saw Willow, looking a bit frustrated. Had she been trying to get his attention? "Sorry... there was... there was a bit of a mess at..."

"You mean with Riley? I heard a few things about it from Buffy." She put her hand on his arm, trying to remind him that he wasn't alone.

"Feel up to listening to me babble between fits of zoning off into space? Everything's a mess right now..." He was actually quite serious. If Willow could help him sort out what had happened, help him put some pattern to these feelings...

"Yeah. We can go sit down and talk. Somewhere away from here... and away from Buffy and the others... she's really obsessing over Riley right now. He's a nice guy, but... I can only listen to Riley this and Riley that for so long, you know?"

He could just picture it. Buffy, pacing and fretting, her hair swinging as she fretted over Riley, and would he recover... "Yeah. Maybe you'd best lead so I don't zone off and walk in front of a car or something."

Graham placed his hand on her shoulder, and the next thing that he knew they were sitting inside of her parents house. She'd given him a glass of orange juice, and had sat on the couch beside him. He'd lost some time again... fortunate that he'd been with Willow.

"She built him. Dr. Walsh built ADAM, and he killed her, he killed Forrest... and now he's taken a stab at Riley. Taken a stab... oh, God..." Graham could feel himself shaking. The whole thing was like some horrible nightmare. He'd only just started to be able to think about the fact that someone had built ADAM when this happened. He felt like everything was falling to pieces around him. It hadn't been some random misguided person, it had been one of the Initiative's own scientist, his own mentor and guide that had done this.

He sat quietly, trying to figure out how to say the rest. How to put the horrible fears and implications into words. "ADAM said that Dr. Walsh had been giving Riley drugs, that Riley was one of her experiments as well. Riley was taking the same vitamins that I am, and they were supplied by the Initiative, by Dr. Walsh. Does that make me an experiment as well? Were we even people to her?"

She pulled her feet up, tucking them under her as she sat. "I really don't know. I mean, it's not like we can ask her anymore, and the Initiative computer system isn't connected to the main systems, or I could try to break into her records and see if she had anything saved, like notes or a journal or something..."

Looking over at her, Graham could tell she was serious. "Can you really do that? Are you that good? We have good security for our system..."

"There isn't a connection that I can use, or I'd look. If I could access the system... I could work with it. I'm good with computers. Nothing that I find would bring anyone back, but... maybe if she built him, there's a weak point that we can use? A design flaw?"

Hope rose inside of him, like a tide washing up on the beach. "I can get you access. Maybe... I can look for disks in her office. I need to know if she did something to me."

"Well, all I can do is try to get into her records. Umm... I'm not officially telling you this, especially not as far as the Initiative or Buffy knows, right? But umm... we have hostile seventeen. His name's Spike." She was twisting her hair around her finger so tightly that he could see raised ridges of flesh between the red twists.

"Why did he go to Buffy if she's the Slayer? Why did you keep him? Is he the token mascot or something?" Her statement didn't make sense. Why would they keep a vampire?

"He sort of... thought that Buffy was responsible for his condition. Then, once we convinced him that we didn't do it, we were worried that whoever did could become a danger to us. He had a bit of information, and that way we know exactly where he is."

"Last week, I would have insisted that the Initiative was no danger to anyone, not anyone human. I would have said that Buffy and the rest of you would be in no danger at all." He glanced at Willow, giving a bitter smile at the shattering of that trust. "I wish I could still think that way."

She gave a small sigh, and her eyes were filled with pain and experience and suffering. "Yeah. Life was much simpler back in black and white. Humans were good, vampires and demons were bad. Then, we had some humans causing more trouble than some of the demons, and a vampire helping to prevent the apocalypse, well, two of them on separate occasions. Vampires, not apocalypses. I've lost count of the near apocalypses we've faced. Things get all blurry and confusing."

"I think... those might be interesting stories for some other times." Graham paused, turning over the day's conversation. "I think right now, I just need some time, for everything to sort of settle, you know?"

Graham rested better than he'd expected that night, and felt as if a few things had fallen into place while he'd dreamed. He still was angry, and upset, but not quite as confused and unsettled as he'd been yesterday. He also knew that he had to help Willow get some of that information. He needed to know what had been done to him, and he didn't have the time or skills to decipher everything on his own. But he did have the opportunity to get some of her disks.

Part of him felt that this was wrong, that he shouldn't be shuffling through her files and notes, that he should let her rest in peace and respect her privacy as an individual, and as his superior in the chain of command. But another part couldn't forget ADAM, the carefully stitched together bits of human and demon, and his words of Dr. Walsh as his mother, Riley as his brother experiment. What had she done to them? He would be unsettled and nervous until he knew.

He managed to keep the disks out of sight until history class, and he asked Willow to help him review for the test when the lecture let out. He gave her the disks as they walked to the library, with a murmur of 'You said you were looking for some good disks...'

Who would have thought that a redhead accepting a stack of disks with a little smile and a nod could leave him feeling so relieved?

But Willow was good at helping people, at solving problems. With a smile, a few questions, and a couple minutes, she could figure out something that gave others fits. She had more than intelligence, she was the most caring and compassionate person that he'd ever met. Which was why she helped Buffy save the world, and was helping a chipped vampire that had tried to kill her, and was even now helping him sort out his confused feelings. It was the same reason why she was willing to try to decipher Dr. Walsh's notes and determine if a group of soldiers that had been experimented on, even if she'd never even met most of them.

"If I ever start taking someone like that for granted, someone slap me. Hard." Graham muttered the words to himself, wishing once again that he could talk to Forrest, share his concerns with his talkative friend. But Forrest was gone.

He wasn't certain how he managed through the rest of the week, but eventually, he realized that it was Saturday, and he was done with his classes for the week. Maybe he could check and see if Willow had deciphered anything useful from those disks? He headed towards her house, stopping on the way to pick up some coffee for them both.

He knocked on the door of her parents' house, hoping that she would be there, that he hadn't came out here for nothing. The door opened, and he caught a glimpse of the person inside. It wasn't Willow, it was a lean blond man, very pale, somewhat familiar, although he couldn't quite place him. Seeing him on the porch, the blond started to swing the door shut again, cursing with a British accent.

The accent and the half smothered look of alarm were enough to place the man, if that was the right term, as Hostile 17, although he thought Willow had called him Spike. Why was Hostile 17 at Willow's house? "Open up! I need to talk to Willow!"

Listening carefully, he could hear the vampire talking to someone, his voice muffled by the door. "Red, there's one of those soldier boys at the door. Can you make him go away? I can't very well eat him, not with this chip..."

Hearing those words, Graham decide that microchips were a blessing from above, and a great idea from the Initiative, perhaps the only one they'd had. He certainly didn't like the idea of some vampire eating him, or Willow.

The door opened again, slowly this time. Willow's face peeked around the door, and she smiled when she saw him. "Graham! Hey, good morning, err, afternoon." She opened the door, gesturing for him to come inside.

Following her into the house, he noticed that all the drapes were firmly shut, and there were some books scattered on the table, as well as a mug that appeared to be half full of blood. That pointed to the idea that Willow had somehow ended up... vamp-sitting? "Willow, why do you have a vampire in your house?"

"It was too crowded elsewhere, and he was getting on everyone's nerves, so I brought him over here. He makes the place feel a bit less empty, if that makes any sense. And, well, he has that chip, so it's not like he's going to hurt me." Her voice was so calm, as if it was only logical to take a vampire home with her.

"Uhhh, if you're sure." He sat down, handing her a cup of coffee. "Did you get anywhere with those disks?"

"What disks?" The vampire was looking at him, his expression one of suddenly focused predatory intensity.

"I gave Willow some disks to see if she could decipher anything useful off of them. Dr. Walsh built something horrible... I'm hoping there will be information on how, and why, and a way to defeat it. She also may have done something to us..." His voice trailed of as he contemplated the words of the creature again. '...my brother, she created you as well, with her drugs and her pills.'

The vampire leapt to his feet, his whole body tense with some emotion. "Red! Is there anything on those disks about this chip? An off switch, directions for removal, an override or something?"

Willow had settled herself at a computer, coffee at her side. Glancing at them both, she gave a slight smile. "Yes, yes, and no. I've got some progress with the decryption, there's a lot of notes and charts and diagrams. I'm still working on most of the stuff about ADAM, but I think there's the whole thing in here. There's some stuff on the chip, but all I've got so far are theories on why and how it works, and a location diagram for implantation, and some notes on how to anesthetize a vampire. I got a bit more progress on some of her other notes, although not enough for it to all make sense. The bad news is that she wanted to make a whole lot more ADAM's, and she was preparing you guys for it, something about some immuno-suppressants to prepare for surgical grafting, and there was some stuff about the vitamins."

"She was tinkering with her soldiers? What good would that accomplish? Can you take the chip out using that diagram?" Oddly, the vampire's first question paralleled Graham's thoughts quite closely.

"Typical mad scientist complex, she wanted to build a better minion... err, soldier. One that would have better physical abilities, wouldn't get sick, and would be absolutely loyal to her. It would take a surgeon to get the chip out, and I'm not a surgeon, I'd probably give you serious brain damage if I tried. There's a lot more that I haven't got deciphered, but... I think she put a lot of the stuff into your vitamins. Minerals, hormones, steroids, some other stuff... although they do actually contain vitamins, including calcium and vitamin C."

Graham could only sit there, aware that his dismay was mirrored in the vampire. Both of them had been tampered with, altered without their knowledge or consent, and now they were trying to figure out a way to live with the consequences.

end Experiment?