Moments of Initiative 4: Where Do I Go?
Author: Lucinda
rating: pg, pg 13
Main Characters: Willow, Graham
Disclaimer: I own nobody from Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
Distribution: Bite Me, please?, NHA, WWW, WillowGraham... anyone else, just ask.
Buffy had fought against ADAM, aided most visibly by Riley and Spike. He'd known that Willow had helped, had seen to many things moving that otherwise wouldn't have to not know that there had been more aid than just the two guys. He hoped that Spike had made it through safely. It wasn't exactly that he liked the vampire, but he did respect him, and it was obvious that Willow had a soft spot for Spike.
For Willow's sake, he wanted the vampire to have made it through everything intact. He'd come to know Willow a lot better while she was decoding the Initiative disks for him. She gave for her friends without reserve, helping in any way that she could. She would cut sleep to help someone, and had a tendency to get so wrapped up in what she was doing that she forgot to eat. Spike seemed to help take care of her, to listen when Willow needed to let something out, and he made sure that she ate. Did Spike have some sort of feelings for Willow? Maybe... If so, she would be safer with someone watching over her.
He had the feeling that Willow's life wasn't going to be getting any easier in the future. The little fact that somehow, Buffy and her team had collapsed the Initiative complex to contain ADAM had caught the attention of the people that had arranged the Initiative project. They were not happy with the things that had happened in Sunnydale, and had showed up, debriefing the surviving personnel in preparation for re-assignment. There would be no more secret underground installation in Sunnydale, no more Initiative. He would be leaving Sunnydale, leaving his newfound friend Willow. Knowing that there would be someone to keep her safe made things a bit easier.
There had been so many questions about what had happened here, from higher officers in the military. To his almost surprise, he'd found himself editing his answers, not giving them all of the information. He left out everything about Willow's magic, left out any knowledge of the current whereabouts of any of the 'non-human research subjects'. No sir, he did not know why Dr. Walsh would have experimented in such a way. Presumably, sir, the composite creature would be underneath the rubble of the Initiative complex. He had the feeling that if he brought up the magic or vampires helping that it would go badly for him. The people debriefing him knew that there were things that went 'bump grrrr' in the night, but they refused to use the words 'demon' or 'vampire' labeling them as non-humans instead. Best not even mention magic...
In the end, they gave him two options for reassignment, not the normal procedure, but the Initiative had hardly ended normally for anyone involved. Especially not for those who had died. Someone had decided that 'non-humans' were still a threat, and they had decided to organize a team to seek out and kill them, no more bringing them back for experiments and research. The other option for him was a perfectly normal base in Fort Lauderdale, doing some repairs on general electronics.
Graham wasn't certain which option sounded better. He was still all twisted up inside from the destruction of the Initiative, the sight of Forrest, altered into the same sort of creature as ADAM. That had hurt, far more than the falling debris that had struck his shoulder. He'd had to watch his friend die all over again, something which had burned and stung like acid. He needed to sort out his thoughts.
He'd been trying to sort out his thoughts unsuccessfully when he stopped to get a cup of coffee. He noticed Willow sitting in the corner, looking unhappy about something. Maybe he could help cheer her up.
"Hi. Is this seat taken?"
She looked up, her eyes startled, surrounded by unexpected dark circles, her skin pale and almost waxy. "Now it is."
"You look... Good God, Red, what have you been doing?" He couldn't help the question.
"Same old... research the big problem, find a way to deal with it... help Buffy with her psych notes that she didn't take because of the whole thing with Riley... and there's the whole after effects of the... big party over the weekend, with our mutual not-friend ADAM." Her voice sounded tired.
"How much did that take out of you?" He was worried, she looked as if she hadn't slept for a long time. Exactly what had she done in the complex?
"Well, the basic telekinesis wasn't to bad until it was time to teleport the reactor away, but the whole mind meld thingy... I had Spike and Xander and Buffy's dreams and fears going through my head ever since. It's kept me up." She managed a small smile.
"Spike and Buffy? I hope they didn't umm... bump into each other?" Graham was considering the things he knew, and he didn't think it would be good to merge the minds of a vampire and a slayer, or actually a vampire and anyone mortal...
"No, the me, Xander, and Buffy merge was first, then came the me and Spike merging. It left me with this horrible headache, and then I couldn't sleep... It was bad. I think all I need is some time... but I now know far more about all three of them than I'd ever expected, some of which is the stuff I never wanted to know..." Willow shuddered, apparently thinking about some of the memories she'd experienced.
"So, did you take anything for your headache? Will the other memories fade?" He hoped that she hadn't been scarred for life by mind-melding with a vampire.
"I took far more types of headache medicine than I should have... it dulled it a bit. I truly hope those memories fade... I do NOT want to remember kissing Cordelia or... anything that Spike and Dru did in the bedroom... and I most certainly didn't want to see Riley like that. Ever. He's a nice guy and all, but..." Willow shuddered again.
"Well, that makes my problem seem a lot smaller. I'm being reassigned, but they gave me two options. Should be much easier than repressing memories of your friends' sex lives."
"Please, can we talk about your choices? I've got some scary visuals right now..." Her smile, even if it was a bit weak brightened her face and warmed Graham's heart.
"Scary... I suppose that makes sense. Mind if I walk you back to your place? We can talk there... without blocking the table for other people." Meaning that they could talk more freely out of the public, that they could mention vampires and demons and government assignments.
"Sure. You can make sure I remember to turn where I'm supposed to, and look before walking into the street." She had tried to smile, to make the words sound like a joke, but the effort fell a bit flat.
"What else are friends for?"
"Here? Sometimes to watch your back on account of scary things in the dark." She managed a smile that time, although there was still a lot of pain in it.
"Good point." That sincere acknowledgement of the realities of the hellmouth was the most serious thing on the way back, as Graham talked a bit bout how 'the guys at the frat' were adjusting to their house 'inexplicably' collapsing. Some of the anecdotes were quite amusing.
A short walk found them settled once again on the couch of the Rosenberg house, sodas in hand. Willow was watching him, as if trying to pluck the information from the air around him, or from his very thoughts, which she actually might be capable of doing... Perhaps he'd better explain things before she started mind-melding, he definitely didn't want any third hand memories of Riley and Buffy... Yuck.
"Some other people in the military, I don't know names, but they're highly placed, thought that the idea of a task force to take out demons, rather, 'hostile non human creatures of unknown origin' was a good idea. Still using top grade weaponry and equipment, but no experimental labs this time, just find the menace, destroy the menace, move on. It sounded like it would involve a lot of relocations, and they'd approached some of the other Initiative guys about it as well." He looked at the ice cubes in his glass, pondering some of the details they'd mentioned, statistics on attacks and body counts.
"What's your choice if you don't want to chase demons anymore? I mean, regardless of whatever fancy term the people in charge give them, that doesn't change the fact that you'd be hunting demons. What if you've had enough of nasty things that aren't supposed to be real trying to eat you or your team mates? What if you just want to go somewhere and stick your head in the sand?" She looked curious.
"Fort Lauderdale, beaches, sunshine, basic repair work. Probably be pretty safe doing that as well. Might never even see a demon or vampire..." Graham's voice trailed off as he considered that image, and it suddenly seemed so shallow and empty.
"Spike said once that there were generally a lot of vampires in that area, the sort of places that get swarmed for Spring Breaks. Lots of easy prey, and nobody cares if someone vanishes, they just think they went home." She didn't even seem to consider the fact that in any other place he knew of, that statement would have sounded outrageous.
"Red? You do realize that in any other town in the world... You just shouldn't say things like that? And, do I want to know how he knows about that? Did he go for the Spring Break..." Graham's words slowed, as he considered one thing: Did he really want to know the answer to those questions?
Willow giggled, putting the glass on the table as she almost collapsed into laughter. "I know that silly... that's why we aren't having this conversation in public. Are we even officially having this conversation? And Spike didn't do the snacking on college kids, said they tend to be a bit to sweet, and heavy on the beer. Clashes with his whiskey. You really don't have to understand him Graham, he's just... Spike."
"You really have skipped too much sleep if that seemed that funny to you."
"I know. But, Graham, I think you've already made up your mind what you want to do, just from the way you explained your options. You said you could go hunt demons and travel a lot, or just go fix electronics. You didn't seem to show much enthusiasm for the idea of Fort Lauderdale." Her eyes were still twinkling, while her expression was serious.
He considered her words, and thought back to how he'd phrased the explanations of his two job offers. It did sound like he was more interested in the demon hunting. "You're right, again. Don't you ever get tired of that? What if... I won't be able to drop in for coffee anymore."
"You can email me anytime. I'd say you could call, but... email's a better way to get a hold of me. You can email me anytime, about anything you want to talk to me about. I'm still going to be your friend, regardless of where they send you."
Graham hugged Willow, trying to memorize her scent, the feeling of her being in the same room, so that he would remember her support in the time ahead. "You're a great friend, Red. Tell Spike to take care of you, and I will email you, count on it."
end Where Do I Go?
Author: Lucinda
rating: pg, pg 13
Main Characters: Willow, Graham
Disclaimer: I own nobody from Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
Distribution: Bite Me, please?, NHA, WWW, WillowGraham... anyone else, just ask.
Buffy had fought against ADAM, aided most visibly by Riley and Spike. He'd known that Willow had helped, had seen to many things moving that otherwise wouldn't have to not know that there had been more aid than just the two guys. He hoped that Spike had made it through safely. It wasn't exactly that he liked the vampire, but he did respect him, and it was obvious that Willow had a soft spot for Spike.
For Willow's sake, he wanted the vampire to have made it through everything intact. He'd come to know Willow a lot better while she was decoding the Initiative disks for him. She gave for her friends without reserve, helping in any way that she could. She would cut sleep to help someone, and had a tendency to get so wrapped up in what she was doing that she forgot to eat. Spike seemed to help take care of her, to listen when Willow needed to let something out, and he made sure that she ate. Did Spike have some sort of feelings for Willow? Maybe... If so, she would be safer with someone watching over her.
He had the feeling that Willow's life wasn't going to be getting any easier in the future. The little fact that somehow, Buffy and her team had collapsed the Initiative complex to contain ADAM had caught the attention of the people that had arranged the Initiative project. They were not happy with the things that had happened in Sunnydale, and had showed up, debriefing the surviving personnel in preparation for re-assignment. There would be no more secret underground installation in Sunnydale, no more Initiative. He would be leaving Sunnydale, leaving his newfound friend Willow. Knowing that there would be someone to keep her safe made things a bit easier.
There had been so many questions about what had happened here, from higher officers in the military. To his almost surprise, he'd found himself editing his answers, not giving them all of the information. He left out everything about Willow's magic, left out any knowledge of the current whereabouts of any of the 'non-human research subjects'. No sir, he did not know why Dr. Walsh would have experimented in such a way. Presumably, sir, the composite creature would be underneath the rubble of the Initiative complex. He had the feeling that if he brought up the magic or vampires helping that it would go badly for him. The people debriefing him knew that there were things that went 'bump grrrr' in the night, but they refused to use the words 'demon' or 'vampire' labeling them as non-humans instead. Best not even mention magic...
In the end, they gave him two options for reassignment, not the normal procedure, but the Initiative had hardly ended normally for anyone involved. Especially not for those who had died. Someone had decided that 'non-humans' were still a threat, and they had decided to organize a team to seek out and kill them, no more bringing them back for experiments and research. The other option for him was a perfectly normal base in Fort Lauderdale, doing some repairs on general electronics.
Graham wasn't certain which option sounded better. He was still all twisted up inside from the destruction of the Initiative, the sight of Forrest, altered into the same sort of creature as ADAM. That had hurt, far more than the falling debris that had struck his shoulder. He'd had to watch his friend die all over again, something which had burned and stung like acid. He needed to sort out his thoughts.
He'd been trying to sort out his thoughts unsuccessfully when he stopped to get a cup of coffee. He noticed Willow sitting in the corner, looking unhappy about something. Maybe he could help cheer her up.
"Hi. Is this seat taken?"
She looked up, her eyes startled, surrounded by unexpected dark circles, her skin pale and almost waxy. "Now it is."
"You look... Good God, Red, what have you been doing?" He couldn't help the question.
"Same old... research the big problem, find a way to deal with it... help Buffy with her psych notes that she didn't take because of the whole thing with Riley... and there's the whole after effects of the... big party over the weekend, with our mutual not-friend ADAM." Her voice sounded tired.
"How much did that take out of you?" He was worried, she looked as if she hadn't slept for a long time. Exactly what had she done in the complex?
"Well, the basic telekinesis wasn't to bad until it was time to teleport the reactor away, but the whole mind meld thingy... I had Spike and Xander and Buffy's dreams and fears going through my head ever since. It's kept me up." She managed a small smile.
"Spike and Buffy? I hope they didn't umm... bump into each other?" Graham was considering the things he knew, and he didn't think it would be good to merge the minds of a vampire and a slayer, or actually a vampire and anyone mortal...
"No, the me, Xander, and Buffy merge was first, then came the me and Spike merging. It left me with this horrible headache, and then I couldn't sleep... It was bad. I think all I need is some time... but I now know far more about all three of them than I'd ever expected, some of which is the stuff I never wanted to know..." Willow shuddered, apparently thinking about some of the memories she'd experienced.
"So, did you take anything for your headache? Will the other memories fade?" He hoped that she hadn't been scarred for life by mind-melding with a vampire.
"I took far more types of headache medicine than I should have... it dulled it a bit. I truly hope those memories fade... I do NOT want to remember kissing Cordelia or... anything that Spike and Dru did in the bedroom... and I most certainly didn't want to see Riley like that. Ever. He's a nice guy and all, but..." Willow shuddered again.
"Well, that makes my problem seem a lot smaller. I'm being reassigned, but they gave me two options. Should be much easier than repressing memories of your friends' sex lives."
"Please, can we talk about your choices? I've got some scary visuals right now..." Her smile, even if it was a bit weak brightened her face and warmed Graham's heart.
"Scary... I suppose that makes sense. Mind if I walk you back to your place? We can talk there... without blocking the table for other people." Meaning that they could talk more freely out of the public, that they could mention vampires and demons and government assignments.
"Sure. You can make sure I remember to turn where I'm supposed to, and look before walking into the street." She had tried to smile, to make the words sound like a joke, but the effort fell a bit flat.
"What else are friends for?"
"Here? Sometimes to watch your back on account of scary things in the dark." She managed a smile that time, although there was still a lot of pain in it.
"Good point." That sincere acknowledgement of the realities of the hellmouth was the most serious thing on the way back, as Graham talked a bit bout how 'the guys at the frat' were adjusting to their house 'inexplicably' collapsing. Some of the anecdotes were quite amusing.
A short walk found them settled once again on the couch of the Rosenberg house, sodas in hand. Willow was watching him, as if trying to pluck the information from the air around him, or from his very thoughts, which she actually might be capable of doing... Perhaps he'd better explain things before she started mind-melding, he definitely didn't want any third hand memories of Riley and Buffy... Yuck.
"Some other people in the military, I don't know names, but they're highly placed, thought that the idea of a task force to take out demons, rather, 'hostile non human creatures of unknown origin' was a good idea. Still using top grade weaponry and equipment, but no experimental labs this time, just find the menace, destroy the menace, move on. It sounded like it would involve a lot of relocations, and they'd approached some of the other Initiative guys about it as well." He looked at the ice cubes in his glass, pondering some of the details they'd mentioned, statistics on attacks and body counts.
"What's your choice if you don't want to chase demons anymore? I mean, regardless of whatever fancy term the people in charge give them, that doesn't change the fact that you'd be hunting demons. What if you've had enough of nasty things that aren't supposed to be real trying to eat you or your team mates? What if you just want to go somewhere and stick your head in the sand?" She looked curious.
"Fort Lauderdale, beaches, sunshine, basic repair work. Probably be pretty safe doing that as well. Might never even see a demon or vampire..." Graham's voice trailed off as he considered that image, and it suddenly seemed so shallow and empty.
"Spike said once that there were generally a lot of vampires in that area, the sort of places that get swarmed for Spring Breaks. Lots of easy prey, and nobody cares if someone vanishes, they just think they went home." She didn't even seem to consider the fact that in any other place he knew of, that statement would have sounded outrageous.
"Red? You do realize that in any other town in the world... You just shouldn't say things like that? And, do I want to know how he knows about that? Did he go for the Spring Break..." Graham's words slowed, as he considered one thing: Did he really want to know the answer to those questions?
Willow giggled, putting the glass on the table as she almost collapsed into laughter. "I know that silly... that's why we aren't having this conversation in public. Are we even officially having this conversation? And Spike didn't do the snacking on college kids, said they tend to be a bit to sweet, and heavy on the beer. Clashes with his whiskey. You really don't have to understand him Graham, he's just... Spike."
"You really have skipped too much sleep if that seemed that funny to you."
"I know. But, Graham, I think you've already made up your mind what you want to do, just from the way you explained your options. You said you could go hunt demons and travel a lot, or just go fix electronics. You didn't seem to show much enthusiasm for the idea of Fort Lauderdale." Her eyes were still twinkling, while her expression was serious.
He considered her words, and thought back to how he'd phrased the explanations of his two job offers. It did sound like he was more interested in the demon hunting. "You're right, again. Don't you ever get tired of that? What if... I won't be able to drop in for coffee anymore."
"You can email me anytime. I'd say you could call, but... email's a better way to get a hold of me. You can email me anytime, about anything you want to talk to me about. I'm still going to be your friend, regardless of where they send you."
Graham hugged Willow, trying to memorize her scent, the feeling of her being in the same room, so that he would remember her support in the time ahead. "You're a great friend, Red. Tell Spike to take care of you, and I will email you, count on it."
end Where Do I Go?