Chapter 11 – The Goal
She woke up, and for a minute – just a moment – she thought it to be another normal, miserable day to look forward to. She tried to hide her face in her pillow, tried to will herself to sleep again, but then she remembered. Him. She turned over, her body still resting on the slightly sagging bed. He was there, just as she figured. He was propped against a chair, his head lulled to the side, his braids covering his face and hung even more beyond. She wished she could sleep so peacefully. She hadn't slept really since it happened – instead, her sleep was just one long nightmare of what happened, and images of Rob kissing even more then just that slut. It made her shudder involuntarily even thinking about it. She pushed the now well thrashed around covers from her and just sort of watched Raven for a lack of better things to do. She didn't want to wake him up – god knew how long he was up the night before.
But, as if he sensed she was awake, he opened his eyes too, though she didn't notice him at first. It was only what he lifted his head she knew he was up, and when he pushed back his braids she instantly felt bad. His face had a pretty big bruise on it, purple and blue and swollen, yet he didn't seem to mind it as much. He sat up better, yawning, and stretched. She wanted to yell at herself for caring but…she knew that perhaps just one person wouldn't be so bad.
"Raven?"
"Mmm?" he asked, rubbing his face sleepily. "Ow! Shit…"
"I tried to warn you…"
He sighed, gingerly pressing a hand to the bruise. "Fuck…is it that bad?"
"…Looks like you got punched in the eye?" She offered.
"I take that as a bad thing." He shrugged. "Whatever…how are you feeling?"
"Empty." She replied. "But you know, it's not that bad anymore. It grows on you."
"Sam…"
"Don't, Raven. This really isn't something you can fix with a sentence stringed with big words." She shook her head, sitting up. "I don't even know if I'd want you to fix it if you could."
"Sam, maybe this is a misunderstanding…"
"So you're on HIS SIDE?" she asked, suddenly angry.
"No no, I'm not on any side, you misunderstand." He shook his head. "But think about it, this whole thing could be bogus…and he isn't acting like he got away with anything…"
"I saw what I saw, I don't care." She muttered, angrily. "And if you don't like it…"
"No no, whatever you like. I was just giving an opinion, you know? It's not up to me, it's up to you. You do what you're comfortable doing."
"Fine then." She nodded, her tone flat. He knew it wasn't worth pushing.
She winced as suddenly her stomach gurgled loudly. She held a hand to it, wishing to quiet it down. She didn't want him to know about how she hadn't been eating…but, well, it was too loud to hide.
"You're empty in another way, huh?" Raven mused, automatically trying to lighten the subject. She shrugged, pulling her legs to her chest.
"Maybe."
"What have you eaten?"
"Vending machine stuff."
"That's it?"
"Well, sorry, apparently you can't really go out too far when you holed yourself up in a room. Its kind of one of those unwritten hermit laws." She joked. He gave her a look. "What! Have you forgotten how to laugh since I went into hiding? Yeesh."
"Ha ha, you're out to look like a starving child, ha." He smirked.
"Well when you put it that way…"
"Let's go get some food, then."
"Wait wait, remember? Hermit unwritten laws? Can't leave the room?"
"What, are you going to live in your hotel rooms?" he asked.
"Not sounding bad to me here…"
"You knew the minute I got in here I wouldn't let you hide out…"
"I'm not hiding! I prefer to call it dodging any unnecessary blows to my already bruised fantasy world. That's the place where my boyfriend doesn't cheat on me with that bitch, by the way…"
"Yes well unless you want to be skin and bones in your fantasy world…I suggest you get dressed and ready and I'll treat you. All the food you want. Really."
"I'm not going to win this, am I?"
"If you come quietly I'll even let you get an extra orange juice." He offered. She gave him a deadpan look.
"Don't get cute with me, BirdBoy. Fine. I'll go. But if you get caught, it isn't my fault. And if I see that jerk…it'll be your head that gets smashed in."
"What? Why me?"
"Well, because you forced me to go outside, which is against ALL my morals now let me tell you…I mean, don't get me wrong, Rob will be destroyed next I see him, but if it's partially your fault I will get you for making the conflict arise."
"I'm glad you don't feel any need to be vengeful toward him…"
"Oh, I'm not vengeful. If I were vengeful, he wouldn't have use of his limbs because I ripped them off. THAT'S VENGEFUL. OKAY!?"
"I understand!" he backed up a step. "Non-homicidal thoughts are key here."
"You know, what the hell is with you? You're supposed to be depressed. And angry. And…vengeful! But no, you're nice and friendly and…NOT DEPRESSED!! DAMNIT RAVEN!!"
"…You're mad at me for not being depressed?" he asked, sounding incredulous.
"YES I AM! I mean, god…that pisses me off. Why aren't you like you're known to be?!"
"People see what they want to see. There are a million names for people who understand most are all no deeper then their appearance. Freaks, dorks, jerks, bastards, weirdos…and me? Depressed and strange. Life is different for everyone, both physically and mentally. The same person can walk by two people and they both have separate opinions…separate ways of seeing things. So if you think I'm not depressed, you see me as that."
She sighed, shaking her head. "No, no. I'm being an idiot. Don't worry about me. Food? Okay. I'll get ready."
And she left, leaving Raven alone in the room to wonder about her losing battle with insanity. Not that it was new for her. Because it seemed she ALWAYS was battling with herself. Even more then him! He glanced around at the heaps of unwashed clothes, the countless tissues in the waste basket, and the many wrappers and papers of half eaten or fully eaten junk food and he had to wonder…did she even remember doing any of this? When he found her, she was in a strange, dull haze…it didn't even look like she was fully aware that she hadn't been out for days. And her threats – not unlike any broken woman would say – but this was not an ordinary woman he was dealing with.
This woman would keep her promises that she was going to destroy the person that did her wrong. She would not stop until the person felt physically the pain that was bottled up inside. He felt partially responsible for her well-being, he always did…ever since he first put eyes on her, friend wise or more. He didn't know why, either. There was just something about her that managed to draw him to her…and he hated how much power she had over him, especially when she was happily oblivious…
"This is not the time." Raven quietly chided himself. "Stop while you're ahead."
"Why are you talking to my bed?"
He turned, trying not to turn red at the fact he was caught talking to himself. He blinked, noting her hair wet. "You took a shower that fast?"
"That fast…?" she looked toward the clock. "I was in there for an hour…and you say there's something wrong with me?"
He looked at the clock, too. "I knew that…uh…I usually take 2 hour showers?"
"Oh. I see. I'm pretty quick with them…give me a second…" she pulled her hair into a pony tail, then placed a backwards hat over it. "Wetter my head is, more chance I get sick. When I'm sick, you can't drag me out." she grumbled.
He drove her out to a small diner he had noted before. He really wanted her to eat. He hadn't noticed it with the more baggy clothing she used to have on, but she really did look a bit thinner, a bit bonier. Perhaps after this food trip she would at least go out and feed herself properly…or even to get fresh air…
She didn't talk too much. Just kind of slouched in the seat, trying to will herself away. "What do you want to eat?"
"Food?"
"What kind of food, I mean…"
"Kind of food? Oh…" she sat up, picking up the menu along with her. She scanned the list, sighing loudly.
"You know, if you want me out of your business, you should at least try to act like you're not brooding and planning your attack on the world." He pointed out.
"I'll have pancakes and an orange juice!" she said in an overly high perky voice.
"…Please don't do that again, I think that was the scariest thing I've ever heard." He joked. She glared at him.
"Ha ha, funny." She smirked. Out of the corner of her eye she noticed the door opening.
Stephanie.
"Shit!" Sam hissed, and Raven looked toward her and visibly paled. With no other option, she ducked under the table, quietly thanking god that she had decided to sit by the window.
Stephanie had noted Raven and walked over to him. He managed the fakest smile he could ever muster, and she obviously had invited herself at the table because she sat down. Sam moved over a little so as not to get touched by her legs. Raven eyed her for a second before clearing his throat.
"Why hello Stephanie, what a…surprise to see you." He eyed her cautiously. "Did I do something wrong?"
She gave out a strangely evil laugh, and Raven just blinked. "Of course not, Raven, I just happened to come along to this…" she glanced around, then cringed as she continued, "nice looking place and thought about getting a bite to eat."
"Really?" he asked, sounding surprised.
She smirked. "Well, not exactly. I was supposed to go to the fanciest place in town for breakfast but apparently they lost my reservation…bastards, they'll be fired by the end of the WEEK!"
People looked over at them and Raven tried not to smirk. "I'm sure they will, if it's up to you…"
Not picking up the insult, she nodded firmly. "Exactly."
It took all the will in him not to roll his eyes.
"So, you decided to talk to me. I see." He shrugged. "Okay." She seemed to make a face at the silence that followed.
"Oh, look at the time…" she looked at her watch. "I have a meeting to get to. Goodbye."
And then, like that, she was gone, leaving Raven to have a need to just mutter under his breath about the idiots of the world. After a minute or two, and the sight of Stephanie actually leaving in her car, Raven kicked Sam's side lightly.
"Ow!"
"You can come out now." He told her. She sighed and pulled herself out from under the cramped space, sitting herself next to Raven. She brushed her arm off.
"Stupid bitch. I really hate her." She grumbled.
"I'm starting to wonder about her lack of brains." He shook his head.
"It must have fell out one of the times she was getting banged for business." She snickered. Raven shuddered.
"Please, if you're going to mention anything that has her and sexually explicit acts in the same sentence…"
"It's true." She shrugged. "Why was I dragged out here again? To like life again? Fuck that."
"So you're just gonna sit in your room for the rest of your life?" he inquired.
"No, not at all. In fact, I'll be out and about…even have matches…but I think I'm going to make a goal right here and now…"
"That sounds promising but knowing you…"
"I'm going to put every single person that I fight from now on into the hospital – until I fight Rob. With him, I'll have even more fun…much more fun…"
Raven winced at the evil snicker that emitted from her mouth, and knew with the look she had…
She had every intention of keeping her goal.