CHAPTER 5—TENSE MEETINGS
The night of her slight argument with Donovan, Loralei found that she couldn't sleep. She didn't immediately notice if her husband was sleeping or not. For a change, Rachel decided to leave her parents alone outside her usual feedings and diaper changes. It was as if she sensed that the atmosphere from earlier that evening had somehow overlapped into the night. Loralei had lain flat on her back for a couple of hours and stared at the ceiling. Every few minutes, she'd glance at Donovan. His back was to her, and he was inhaling/exhaling slowly, as if he were asleep. She wanted to talk to him a little more, to tell him she understood his concern, that she would never fail to appreciate his overprotective behavior [even if it did annoy her to no end]. She didn't make one move toward saying anything. He was asleep, and she had no intention of waking him. Besides, Rachel would probably take care of that soon enough. Sighing heavily, she swung her legs over the side of the bed and drew her body up to her feet. What she didn't know was that Donovan wasn't asleep.
He felt her body moving off the bed, jostling it gently. He watched as her silhouette walked around the room before ducking out the door completely. The last few hours had been slightly tense between them, and he absolutely didn't enjoy having arguments with her. He actually hadn't wanted their conversation earlier to even be an argument. What he wanted more than anything was to sit up with her and talk it out until they both passed out from exhaustion. Of course, that wasn't to be. Loralei appeared to be talked right out. Right after he had laid his heart out before her [as he had done many times], she had grown a bit quiet and withdrawn. He wasn't sure if her tension was directed toward him or the situation at hand. He meant what he said to her. She had suffered enough in the name of others, including her former partner. Was it such a bad thing for him to feel the way he did? Could she fault him for that? Had she faulted him for that? He wanted to get out of bed and seek her out, but he hesitated. She appeared to need a little time alone.
Loralei had settled her body onto the couch, thinking that she might fall asleep quicker if her husband wasn't next to her. She couldn't tolerate the cloud of discord that hung, unmoving, over their bed. She couldn't even bring herself to wake Donovan just to speak to him. Besides, this issue wasn't such a big deal. It shouldn't have been one at all. Yet, she was unbending. Somehow, Donovan's inflexibility had entered her and refused to leave. She wouldn't be happy until she knew what the deal was with Jackson. If she never found out, it might drive her insane [or toward divorce court]. Damn it. She couldn't fathom that idea at all, didn't even want to consider it. She needed to do something that would relax her, she just didn't know what. Reading? Writing? Surfing the Internet? Nothing. She thought of going in with Rachel again, but the baby needed to sleep as much as she did. Perhaps a nice warm bath would do the trick. Yes. She hadn't taken a long leisurely bath in months. She actually hadn't had time for one. She would let Donovan listen for the baby while she did it. She lifted her body off the couch and moved back toward the darkened bedroom.
Donovan focused his eyes on her silhouette again as she reentered the bedroom. Curiously, he watched as she went into the bathroom, closing the door behind her. He heard the rush of water minutes after she entered. She was drawing a bath. She did that when she was having a particularly bad night. Donovan closed his eyes again, once more attempting to go to sleep. However, he couldn't let it go, not now, not ever. He slowly got out of bed and approached the bathroom door. He opened it a tiny crack and noticed that she hadn't even heard the creaking noise. She seemed lost in some type of daze. Totally devoid of clothing, she stood leaning over the bathroom counter. Struck by her gentle beauty [as he always was], he couldn't make one single move, not at first, anyway. He opened the door a bit wider, hoping she would hear and turn to notice him. However, the pounding intensity of the water splashing into the tub drowned out the noise. Right then at that very moment, he literally ached to make it right, ached to make love to her.
Loralei snapped out of her daze after a few moments. If she didn't turn off the water, the tub would overflow onto the floor. Great. Another mess. It's all I need right now. She moved away from the counter and leaned down toward the bathtub. She reached over and shut off the faucet. There was probably too much water in the tub already. Ugh. Nothing is working right tonight. She straightened up and then suddenly felt the solid wall of Donovan's body behind her. Her heart began to race in her chest, and a scream was just behind her lips. She was glad she hadn't let it rip. Their neighbors probably would have called the police.
"Goddamn it, Frank," she whispered, "I wish you wouldn't do that," she said through clenched teeth.
He was relieved to note that the hostility in her voice was forced. He buried his face into her hair and his hands came up around her waist. They eventually moved up to her breasts where they lingered. She felt him growing hard against her, and although she didn't really want to give him the satisfaction, she groaned a little anyway. She couldn't help it. His touch drove her completely nuts. He pulled her back against him, holding onto her tightly, without even hinting that he wanted to let her go. He tried to pull her backward, toward the bed, but she resisted.
"Uh uh," she moaned.
At first, he didn't understand. He thought she was trying to refuse him, but something about the way she uttered 'uh uh' made him think otherwise. He completely understood what she wanted. Instead of trying to draw her backward, he proceeded to push her forward until her body was almost against the counter. She lifted her leg and rested her knee against the edge of the counter. She was certain that later, she would likely regret the awkward position, but at the moment, she didn't give a ripe fuck. She wanted him, and she couldn't wait another second. One arm remained wrapped around her waist while the other slid down to allow his hand to tightly grip the side of her hip. Hungrily, crazily, wildly, he entered her from behind as an animalistic groan ripped from the very depths of his throat. Once more, he lost himself in her, and would have been perfectly happy if he were never found again.
* * *
It was fairly early when Jake sauntered into the office. He had no idea what possessed him to come in at this hour. Every now and then, he preferred waiting until the last minute before deciding to go into work. Donovan and Cody were usually the first to arrive, followed by Monica and Alex. This morning, Jake was pretty sure he would be the first in the office. However, he was quite wrong. When he entered the heart of the operation, he was shocked to see that Alex had beaten him to the punch. What was even worse was that Donovan's brother was there with her. What the fuck? He had never liked Farron Donovan, and this morning, he was damn close to hating him. Just because your brother forgave you doesn't mean I have to tolerate you. What did the prick think he was doing? He was a goddamn former drug trafficker who had basically made himself at home in the headquarters of a Special Ops team with more than close ties to the FBI [the very people who wanted to bring him and his buddies down]. You have a lot of nerve. Of course, something else was disturbing him even more. He stood back and crossed his arms over his chest and watched the little duo dynamic unfolding before him. Alex and Farron were standing close together, almost touching, but not quite. Both seemed to be trying to be very careful and watchful. They were undoubtedly watching out for the boss. Donovan might not take kindly to his brother hitting on one of his agents. Yet, Alex didn't seem very damn put off by Farron's obvious flirting behavior. She was smiling at him, and he was returning it. Although they appeared to be keeping watch, they seemed totally into each other. What the hell? He had often thought in the past that the world had gone mad. Today, he had begun to think the same thing. Farron Donovan, ex-drug trafficker, sleazy twin brother of Frank mixed up with Alex, current SO agent with only a few marks on her record, but nothing to write home about. He wasn't certain why their interaction was bothering him so much. He wanted to clear his throat to break it up a little, but he couldn't force the sound out of his throat. His eyes were riveted on them [more on Farron, if the truth were known]. His opinion of Farron was one that wouldn't change any time soon: once a sleaze, always a sleaze. Instead of clearing his throat or speaking, he turned away from the spectacle they had created, and he went about his usual morning work routine without glancing at them again. They would notice him soon enough. He hoped Farron hung around long enough for Donovan to see him. That would be completely interesting. He grinned at the thought.
"I really should go. My brother will probably make an appearance at any second now," Farron said. He cocked his eyebrow quizzically. "Tonight?"
Alex smiled a little. "Uh, I don't know. Depends on what the fearless leader digs up for us. There aren't any new cases, so we should be good to go. How about I call you?"
Tonight, Jake thought. He had almost turned around in his seat. Uh uh. No way. I can't let them shake me up like that. Were they dating? Was that it? Vaguely, he wondered how long this thing had been in the works. He hadn't been aware that Alex was even attracted to the guy. How could she? He was a basic carbon copy of the boss. If Donovan had had a twin sister instead of a brother, he didn't think he could realistically kiss her without thinking of Donovan. Shit. Don't even go there.
"I'll be waiting," Farron said before giving her a brief kiss on the lips [the sound of which forced Jake to jerk around suddenly]. He turned away from Alex and that was when he finally noticed Jake hiding out in the corner of the room. The sight was an amusing one. He wondered how long he had been looming in the shadows listening to them. "Good morning, Agent Shaw," he said. At the mention of Jake's name, Alex turned around. "You should have come over and said hello."
Jake fixed his dark eyes on Farron's face. A sarcastic, almost bitter grin touched his lips. God, how he hated this fucker. "I would have if I had cared for the company," he said, his voice tinged with a sound that could only be described as smarmy. "You know, you hang out here more than you do at your own job," he chided. "What is it that you do again? Pharmaceuticals? Or something to do with, oh, I don't know, drugs?"
Farron chuckled. "Very mature of you, Agent Shaw. Who and where I choose to visit is none of your business. Good day."
"Good day to you, too, dickhead," he growled as Farron strolled out the building. Slowly, Jake came out of his 'hiding place' and fixed his eyes on Alex. He figured she might be angry, but she wasn't. She was smiling a little. Her amusement brought his blood to an even quicker boil. "You're dating this guy, Alex? Jesus, what were you thinking?"
Her smile didn't falter. In fact, it widened. "I don't know, Jake. It's one of those things that just kind of happened."
Alex's smile was still irking the shit out of him. "Doesn't it weird you out? Isn't dating him like messing around with Donovan?"
She shook her head. "Nope. He's quite different. He looks like the boss, but that's all."
Jake wanted to say more, wanted to venture into his feelings a little deeper. He hesitated. It wasn't the right time, not really. If he were to say something now, she would think he was a jealous prick or something, and he was far from that. Or are you, a little voice stated in the very back of his mind. Hell no. He couldn't go there, not in a million billion years. He kept his opinion to himself [for now, anyway]. Besides, who said their relationship would progress any further than a few dates? Alex was a sensible woman, and she wouldn't fall for Farron's line for long, and Farron had a line. Guys like him always did. He rolled his eyes at her as if he was saying 'whatever,' and turned away. He had to find something to occupy his mind before he picked a fight with Alex, and he didn't have any intention to do that. Not yet, anyway. Another thought entered his mind. What if he were to approach Donovan with this? He didn't necessarily intend to tell him that Alex was dating his brother, but what if he were to mention that Farron had been hanging around? Of course, he wasn't certain that Farron had come more than once, but with the 'cozy' way he acted with Alex, he probably had. Would those intentions rock the boat too much? Fuck it, he thought. If she wanted to get mixed up with the likes of Farron Donovan, it wasn't any of his business. Let her go. Let her do it. She would eventually learn.
* * *
A bit before one, Loralei entered the office. Earlier, Donovan had told the team that the FBI director would be meeting with his wife that afternoon. The team wasn't surprised to see her, but of course, they [especially Cody] immediately began looking for the baby.
"Sorry guys, I had to leave her with a sitter. If I keep bringing her down here, by the time she's two, she'll be completely and totally rotten," Loralei said with a smile.
"Party pooper," Cody grumbled good-naturedly.
Loralei immediately began looking for Donovan. He wasn't in the room when she arrived, and she was pretty sure he had gone up to his office. Their slight misunderstanding two nights ago had been smoothed out, and the tiny gap between them had been bridged by their lovemaking and physical closeness. However, Loralei still thought that Donovan was a bit out of sorts with her. Perhaps it was a foreboding shadow of events to come. She politely excused herself and made her way upstairs.
Donovan had, of course, seen her when she came in. He was a bit amazed when she knocked on the door. He looked toward it and fixed it with a crazy, confused stare. What was she thinking? Sometimes, she was a silly, silly woman, but it never failed to please him immensely. "Loralei, what the hell?"
She opened the door and grinned at him. "I was trying to be polite." She entered the office and closed the door behind her. He sat behind his desk facing her. "I'm a little early, but I couldn't stay home. I'm nervous."
He crooked his finger toward her. "Come here." She didn't hesitate to approach him. He took gentle hold of her arm and drew her down to his lap. "What do you expect to happen?"
She reached up and settled her hand on the back of his head, where she began playing with his hair. "I don't know, but I feel jumpy, as if he's coming here to surprise me with something. I never know what to expect out of Casey. He was always very unpredictable. I also have a feeling that he didn't like Bart anymore than he liked me."
Shortly before Casey was to show up, Donovan left Loralei in his office and went downstairs. He told her that once Casey arrived, he'd send him up. She stayed seated behind Donovan's desk and nervously began twiddling her thumbs. She wondered why the idea of seeing Chance Casey again bothered her so much. He had no power over her anymore, and she had nothing to fear from him. Yet, she couldn't shake her apprehension.
Chance Casey, directed by Donovan, entered the office promptly at 2:00 p.m. It had been nearly two years since she had last seen him. He hadn't changed much. He was tall in stature like her husband, but with none of his intriguing features. His hair was clipped short and the color of desert sand. His eyes were the ice blue of Alex's without the calm tenderness. He had a strong lantern jaw that he normally kept clenched tightly. He wasn't necessarily a bad looking sort, but he had always managed to give Loralei the willies. Casey did his own once over. Kadin still looked the same, with the exception of her hair length. She had let it grow. She still had the same stubborn beauty and open defiance in her bright green eyes. She was watching him carefully, cautiously. Without asking or waiting for her to ask, he sat down in one of the chairs Donovan had set up for this specific purpose. He stared at Loralei steadily, and she immediately wondered what his game was.
Donovan couldn't keep his eyes off his office. He could see both Loralei and Casey through the expanse of windows just off the far wall. He couldn't quite see if their lips were moving yet. How tempted he had been to sit in on the meeting. Of course, he wouldn't do that. Their slight argument two nights ago would turn into a full-fledged battle if he did one tiny thing to betray her trust. Sitting in on the meeting would only serve to prove that he didn't trust her enough to allow her to make up her own mind. He did, he wholeheartedly did, and he didn't have the desire to hurt her again. Letting out a frustrated sigh, he tore his eyes away and faced the quartet of agents. They were gazing up at him curiously, as if they had read his mind.
"Bart came to me a few days ago wanting to see the baby," Loralei began. "He acted as if he wanted to tell me something, but he wouldn't. We had set up a lunch date the next day, but he didn't show up. I haven't heard from him since," she said.
I think the bitch is lying to me, he thought. "Did he seem out of sorts or acting particularly strange," he asked sedately.
What is your angle, she wanted to ask. Instead, she said, "Yes, he did. He didn't elaborate. My husband came with me that day. Bart and Frank don't mesh well. He wouldn't speak to me in Frank's presence. I think that's why he set the date for lunch. Like I said, he didn't say anything. If he did, I wouldn't mind telling you. Director Casey, why did you come to me?"
Kadin is sharp. Perhaps her husband has been giving her lessons. She knows I have an angle. If I can only get her to buy it, I'd be set. "Kadin, I'm afraid I have some bad news. Agent Jackson is MIA. He has been working a complicated field assignment. We didn't know where he went until we located him here. I tried to find him, but had no luck. Once again, he has disappeared. I'm afraid he may have been abducted or killed."
She stared at Casey for a long time before she spoke. "Cody checked the records, Casey. There was no assignment."
The sorry ass fucking UC team. I hate you. I hate you. "Not all assignments can be tracked, Kadin. You should know that, especially considering your past and the fact that you're married to a former CIA operative. You may have difficulty accepting this, but I had nowhere else to turn." That's it. Play to her sympathetic side. That will surely draw her back. "I never upgraded your status, Kadin. You're still inactive, still considered an agent. I want you to come back and help us find Jackson. If anyone could help find him, it would be you. We also need an operative on the case Jackson was working. I could have the paperwork sent through tonight, and you could be back on active status by morning."
Loralei couldn't believe it. She stared at Director Casey incredulously. He was asking her to come back. Her. Loralei Kadin, the extreme fuck up of all fuck ups. "Do you realize what you're asking? I've left and I have no desire to return. I'm married now, and I have a child. I can't just pick up and leave that."
Bitch. Bitch. Bitch. Was he the least bit surprised that she'd want to choose domestic bliss? Was he? His plan wasn't completely thwarted. He had one more trick up his sleeve, and he was certain this one would clinch it. "I understand, and I respect that [I can't believe I said that with a straight face]. Jackson needs you, Kadin. He really took a lot of heat for you. I would think you'd want to return the favor. Can you deny that you have a need to help? Come back, Kadin. I could have you back in the field in less than seventy-two hours."
She sighed sadly. "That was a fucking low blow, Casey," she spat angrily. He started to say something, but she held up her hand in a dismissive gesture. "Do what you need to do on your end. Give me a week to prepare my husband, our child, and myself for this. I want you to be aware that I'm not doing it for you. I'm doing it for Jackson because I owe him," she spat through clenched teeth.
On the inside, Director Casey was smiling victoriously. On the outside, he was thoughtful and retrospective. "Thank you, Kadin. I can't express my gratitude in mere words. Neither will Bart."
Loralei said nothing. She couldn't. She had accepted the challenge without discussing it with Donovan. She thought their argument two nights ago was bad, but the one tonight would be ten times worse. What have you gotten yourself into this time, she thought for about the millionth time.