He couldn't sleep that night, the darkness under his eyes proved it. He sat down in front of the television contemplating. His reason of distress was not one to be taken lightly for it could mean the heart was never to mended. His love for him was unconditional, even though he didn't show it. Refused to show. He didn't know how prejudice those he cared about were and afraid of the reaction he would get from him would be too much.


His distress bothered him. At first, he refused to believe he could love one in the same as him. When he first met him, he didn't show it, but inside he hesitated at the sight of him. When they became more acquianted, he taunted, not necesarily knowing any other way of acting towards him. But, that didn't help it. He still loved him, whether he'd admit it or not.


One of the faintest heart, no matter what the background, status, appearance, some things can run deeper and be in everyone. Everyone is capable of love. A tyrant who cares for no one loves the ablitiy to be a tyrant, though not in the sense we are discussing now. I'm simply stating a point.
Kuwabara sat staring at nothing on the sofa. Eikichii meowed at him and jumped in his lap. He glanced down and softly stroked her fur. The cat purred softly and closed it's eyes. In some sense it calmed him in a way, the purring of a cat and with the warmth it emits is very soothing. He smiled and leaned his head back, closing his eyes. He couldn't help where his mind wandered, back to him. So his relaxation was cut short.


He sighed. Not knowing how to handle this to any extent. He was afraid to ask Yuusuke, for he might not understand. Kurama might though. Botan, Yukina, or Keiko might flip and blab to everyone how we'd make a cute couple or maybe look upon him as disgusting. Either outcome he didn't want. He liked his friendships, and he didn't want to ruin any of them.


He pushed Eikichii off his lap and stood up. He walked toward the kitchen when he heard a knock at the door. He dreamt it was his longing and decided to dimiss that fact. He would never come to see him. He blinded himself with the mere fact that he would never love him. That hurt more than a rejection itself for he gave himself no longing hope and hid behind a hidden mask of pain.
He called to the mysterious being behind the wooden door and unlocked it. Upon opening the door, he stood there. He looked a little distruat and his expression was somewhat hard to read. Kuwabara searched his eyes and thought he saw a glimmer of fear.


"I need to talk to you," he spoke. Kuwabara slowly stepped aside. Hopefully it was what he was now letting himself wish to be.


"Eikichii!! Stop that," he looked down at the cat and moved it away. He gestured to the couch.


"What's up, shrimp?" Kuwabara tried to ask normally.


"Please, stop calling me that," he sounded almost pleadingly.

"Sorry. What's up, Hiei?" he gave him an apologetic look.

"I'm kinda in a runt," Hiei looked down.

"What do I need to bail you out of?" Kuwabara asked.

"Not that kind... emotionally, I mean."

"Oh, really? Why didn't you go to Yukina?" Kuwabara inquired, somewhat unsure of why he was here, and to why he would ask him about it.

"I didn't want her to know," Hiei looked up, this time almost apologetically, sensitivly.

"Hiei?"

"I believe I've fallen in love with someone, and I don't know how to tell them," he gave a soft laugh.

"Why did you come to me then? I'm not a counsler," Kuwabara said saracastically. When in love with someone, you preferably don't want to help them with who they are in love with when you believe it's not yourself. It also hurts more because they don't know you love them, so they don't know not to ask and when you don't want them to know, it's even worse.

"Because you know them, and maybe you could help me?" Hiei looked at him with his stern look, which didn't quite didn't fit his statement.

"I'm not the one to talk too unless I know who."

"I don't want you to know who," he could feel the arguementive tone in Hiei's voice.

"Then I can't help you!"

"Just give me some advice! Is it so difficult?" Hiei gave him an irritated look.

"It's not my fault I'm having a love crisis!" the verbal irony in this.

"I'm sorry I have issuse like the rest of you, baka ningen!"

"Your just as a baka, Forbidden Child. That's what you are, right. The abomination?" Kuwabara realised his words to late. He didn't mean them, but anger and hate can take it's toll.

"It was a mistake coming here. I should go," Hiei turned and started walking out. A tear slipped from his eye and hit the floor as a gem. Kuwabara noticed and picked it up. When he looked up, he was gone. He sighed and plopped down on the couch. He felt as if he had actually lost him. He held the gem in his hand tightly and softly started to cry into his hands. It was too much. He loved Hiei, but Hiei loved someone else, in his mind.

He slowly stood up and decided to go for a walk. He grabbed a jacket and walked outside, locking the door behind him. He quickly walked across the street and headed down towards the park. He tried to think, but his thoughts went back to him.

When one can not stop thinking, when you think you've lost them forever, then there's nothing that could ruin your relationship any further, right? What's the point in not saying anything now? It can't do any more damage.

Kuwabara sat under a tree in the park. He watched as the leaves of autumn fell to the ground below him. He sighed softly. A gem fell on his head.

His head shot up. He looked up and saw Hiei sitting there, dried tear streaks sitting on his face.

"Hiei," Kuwabara said softly. Hiei looked down at him. "I'm sorry."

"That why your here?"

"No... I wasn't expecting to see you. I came here to think," he replied honestly.

"Figure it out?"

"Yes. So who do you love?" Kuwabara changed the subject.

"You know him more than I do."

"I need a little more detail than that."

"He's here now. I can sense something that I'm not sure I should, but he looks up as I look down," he looked down at Kuwabara who looked shocked.

"Hiei-"

"I shouldn't have said anything... but if I didn't I would have died on the inside."

"Ai shiteru," Hiei's eyes widened a bit. He glanced down to see Kuwabara smiling back at him. He smiled back.

"Ai shiteru."

Time in one's arms go by faster than most others. Three months and holding, though the occasional nuisance. The question now is whether or not friends are really friends if they know...

~Owari~

reviews? anyone? Arigatou...