Part Three

Angel felt uncomfortable. He sat in the back room of the magic box with all of his and Buffy's combined 'gang's' Buffy herself was sorting through the weapons. He rather got the feeling that she was doing it so she could do *something*. Angel too found himself paying more attention to the book he was reading than was strictly necessary. He couldn't help it, he just needed to concentrate his thoughts on something that wouldn't develop into another dose of heartache.

He gave up trying to read the book; the words weren't going in anyway. Slamming the book shut he headed over to the corner where Connor lay in his travel crib. 'Hey Connor.' He whispered gently playing his fingers over his stomach. Immediately Connor opened his eyes and looked thoughtfully up at him. 'Don't worry. I'll keep you safe.' Connor shut his eyes again and Angel just stood watching him quietly. He had to keep focused or he could lose Connor. And he knew without a doubt that he would die if he lost Connor.

'Angel, we'll find something.' Wes told him gently. He had somehow snuck up to be standing next to Angel and for a moment the two men just watched Connor breathing. Until, of course, Cordy screamed out in agony.

She recovered a moment later and propping herself from the floor shrugged at the Scoobies standing open mouthed around her. 'What?' She demanded. 'Just… Aspirin. Now.' Fred shuffled around in her purse till she found some and threw them to Cordelia. 'Ok, Angel.' She said gearing herself up. 'There's a kid back-stage at the bronze and… about five demon guys.'

'What do the demons look like?' Giles asked timidly.

'Blue with a red jewel in the forehead.' Angel stood looking a little astonished for a moment then shrugged.

'I fought something a bit like that before, it was called A Mohra Demon, there's reference of him in the book of Kelsor.' Angel said, trying hard to fight the faint hope that this demon's veins ran with the blood of 'extra strong' eternity. Sure he pretty much had a chance to turn human but maybe this one's blood would kill him. He couldn't risk it again, especially now. Buffy was with Riley. Angel couldn't just push her into a new existence with him. She was perfectly happy with her new life, so far as he could tell. 'Can, you… er do the research for me. Ring me when you find out something.' Trying to avoid actually saying anything he looked pointedly at Cordelia who he hoped would get the point that he wanted to know if this one could turn him human too.

He swept out the door. Cordy's vision at least gave him an excuse to get out of there. He had hated the atmosphere. A moment later he heard light footsteps behind him. It was Buffy, he could sense her before he saw her and he turned around to face her, leaning casually on his battle axe.

'Buffy. This is my fight.' He said tiredly.

'Tough, this is my territory.' She replied sharply then softening, she sighed. 'I'm sorry, I didn't mean to start that again. It's just I always feel sort of useless at this point. I'm not helping researching I just sit around till I get told who to kill.'

'You'll never be useless.' He automatically reached out an arm to tuck a hair away from her face. Then withdrew, scared that if he touched her he wouldn't be able to control himself. 'Come on, I'll show you the bat mobile.'

'The bat mobile?' She said grinning with delight at his humour, she's so beautiful when she smiles. The thought crossed Angel's mind before he could stop it and he pushed it away trying to concentrate on the up coming fight.

Buffy fought alongside Angel at the back of the Bronze, it felt so odd to have his presence there next to him. Battling with her, for her, more than once he had paused for his own attacks to warn Buffy of the demon's tactics near her. The way they had before. She tried to focus on her fight but the warriors weren't that good. They seemed weakened from something so in a matter of moments she had slain two. She turned to look for more and found that Angel had killed two more leaving a final one cowering in the corner.

Buffy waited for Angel to kill the demon, but for some reason he was hesitating just standing over it. Eventually he seemed decided, knocking the demon unconscious, but not killing it.

'Er… Angel.' Buffy interrupted his deep thought, 'why exactly aren't you killing him?'

'I want to find out something from Cordy first.' He replied absentmindedly. Then as though snapping out of his thought he looked at her, there was clearly something on his mind. She could see the ghosts haunting his eyes. 'Maybe I should just kill it.' He muttered, and turned to do so.

'No wait.' Buffy found herself saying and catching his arm as he went to turn around.

'Why?' The bitterness in his voice shocked Buffy and she dropped her hold on his arm.

'I just have a feeling.' she replied meekly. She turned her eyes away from him but she could feel his eyes on her back she was about to tell him to forget it when his phone went off. She turned to face him as he pulled it out of his pocket and after a few seconds of fiddling managed to turn it on.

'Angel… Yeah… I've got one here… Okay… Thanks… I'll bring it around… bye.'

'What did she say?' Buffy asked curiosity overwhelming her.

'She er… Sort of hard to explain.'

'I want to know.' She returned simply.

'Do you? Are you sure? 'Cos I can't help thinking you'll try and kill me afterwards.'

'Was that a joke?' She replied confused. 'Stop trying to avoid the subject and tell me!'

'I told you, I fought something very much like this demon before, but this other one-'

'Hang on,' Buffy searched her memory, 'Mohra demon. That was when I went and visited you, but you killed it right away. Why's it a big deal?'

'Because,' Angel took a deep breath and tried not to think too much about the intimate details of that day. 'Because, when I fought it the first time we didn't kill it, so we went of to hunt for it.'

'No we did-' Buffy tried to interrupt and Angel held up a hand to pacify her.

'Wait. You went to see if it went to the Lone Bar and I kept on looking in the sewers, I found it but before I killed it some of it's blood mixed with mine and made me human.'

'You're human!' Buffy shouted. 'Why the hell didn't you tell me?'

'Because I'm not anymore!' He shouted back, immediately angry with himself for shouting at her. 'If I'd kept my mortality you would have died and I couldn't do that.' He turned away, drawing in unnecessary breath to try and calm him. 'The Oracles, they took me back to the beginning of the day, so I could set things right.' He turned back to face her and seeing the pained look in her eyes pulled her into a hug. 'It's why you don't remember.'

'I was there wasn't I? And we got to be together.' He nodded his head slightly in return and she buried herself deeper into the cool folds of his coat. He felt her stiffen and pull away. She stalked away from him 'What does this demon's blood do?' She asked quietly.

'I don't know. Cordelia found a picture of it, but the book; it's in Gaelic. I'm the only one who can read it. 'We can take it back with us, see what the book says.'

'What if it can turn you human again?'

'If it just turns me human, I er, I can't do it. I'll just kill it and we'll find out what the visions mean and then we'll go. Back to forgetting.'

'Why? Don't you want to be human? I don't understand.' A sob choked in her throat and Angel, was dying inside to see her that way.

'Because, if I'm just human. I'm no use to anyone, and then you and everyone I know and love will die. For me to be prepared to turn myself human I have to keep my powers.'

'Why's it always about the powers?' Tears burned in her eyes and she stood looking so helpless and confused and angry.

'If I don't have my powers I can't help people, and you know that's why were here Buffy. We fight till we die, then we keep on fighting. If I'm weak I can't protect the innocents. Or you.'

'How many times do I have to tell you Angel? I'm more than capable of looking after myself. Slayer, Remember?'

'A Slayer who has died twice.' He replied viciously, immediately regretting his words. 'I'm sorry Buffy I didn't mean it… I just. I couldn't survive it if you died again. I just couldn't handle it. Please understand Buffy.' She nodded slowly.

'I understand.' Tears rolled down her cheeks and she brushed them away, she nodded at the body of the demon. 'Come on, let's go.'

A few minutes later Angel found himself sitting in the back room of the magic box again. Skimming over the Gaelic text in the book. 'What does it say?' Buffy whispered after a minute.

'Just general stuff about the demon. It's telekinetic, actually, does that explain the stuff from before?' He looked at her questioningly

'Maybe.' She replied clearly not wanting to go into details. 'What else does it say?'

'The rest is, well it's a prophecy.' He told her and frowning went back to it. 'And a really complex one at that, I'm not totally sure what it means. Giles, Wes, could you help me please?' They nodded and headed over to help.

Hours later everyone had gone home, except Buffy who'd gone on patrol and Angel, Wes and Giles who were still working on the prophecy. Buffy patrolled alone and was grateful for the silence. She heard a twig break behind her and spun around stake in hand to find Spike standing there, grinning cockily at her.

'Spike.' She almost growled, 'What the hell do you want?'

'Nothin' just wanted to say hi, no laws against that is there?'

'Yes.' She replied, 'You'd better get out of here Spike. Angel's in town.'

'Peaches? Oh Shit. Why they hell's he here? I'll stand up to him this time. He took my bloody Gem.'

'Spike?'

'Yeah?'

'Don't call him peaches.'

'Oh, getting all temperamental 'bout him again are you?' He grinned wickedly. 'Bet Riley would be interested in that.'

'Spike. If you say anything I will hang you upside down from the cross on the cliff just in time for the morning sunrise.'

'Would you really?' He asked hopeful.

Frustrated Buffy just sighed and changed her tack. 'I'll tell Angel you're here, and from what I heard he's not best pleased with you.'

Spike considered this for a moment and nodded. 'You know I'll just be quietly getting drunk in my crypt Riley won't hear anything from me.'

'Good.' And with that Spike vanished, leaving Buffy alone to finish her sweep of the park. But nothing else interrupted her all night.

'Ahuh!' Giles exclaimed 'I've found it, it's a sort of cross-dialect a peculiar mix at that. But this piece here, I think it means "the last one" and this piece over here it's a round word, it means death but also birth, a sort of new beginning, rebirth.'

'Sanshu.' Angel whispered and leaned back deep in thought.

'What?'

Wes quickly explained about the prophecy involving Angel's Sanshu. 'You'll become totally human? Have you told Buffy?'

'No. I wasn't sure if it would happen within her lifetime, so I thought I'd better not.' Giles nodded understanding.

'Well according to this text this is it, but, you've got to stop something else first. It just says the consequences would be dire if it's not stopped. It's not specific about what it actually is.'

'Cordelia might have another vision that could help.' Wes said, but his voice was concerned the powers were known for giving them just enough information and the clues being subtly hidden he couldn't help but feel he'd missed something vitally important.

Angel tensed as he felt Buffy's presence near. He jumped up and turned around in time to see the back door open and Buffy come in, shaking the raindrops off her coat she headed over to Angel. 'Have you got anywhere to stay?'

He shook his head. 'I was just going to crash at the Crawford Street Mansion.'

'You haven't got enough time to get there. It's almost dawn.' She looked at him for a moment as if contemplating a decision then shrugged. 'If we leave now we can make it to my place before then.'

'That's a good idea, you can talk.' Giles said pointedly. Angel carefully collected up his son and his things and headed out the door to his car.