Chapter 7: When The Insane Go Camping
"Aah, don't you love the outdoors?" Mace asked his fellow council members.
The council had been discussing the inflation rate of pierogis when Mace, Adi, Plo, and Ki-Adi decided to go camping.
Now they stood in the middle of nowhere, trying to figure out how to set up their tents.
Mace and Adi noticed that Plo and Ki-Adi were having trouble resisting the urge to light their tent on fire, so Mace said, "Adi and I will set up the tents. You two make a fire."
"F.fire!" Plo and Ki-Adi yelled in unison as they dashed into the forest, searching for firewood.
"Are you sure you should have done that?" Adi asked. "They might go and burn down the forest."
"Don't worry, we have plenty of water," Mace replied.
"W.w.water?" Adi asked nervously. "Water, where?"
"In the river down the hill," Mace replied.
"Just keep the water down there," Adi replied.
***
The four Jedi Masters sat around the fire, eating Smore's and listening to each other tell ghost stories.
"I love Smore's," Mace stated, patting his stomach, which had swollen to many times its normal size.
"Mace, if I hadn't seen you eat all those Smore's, I would swear that you were 8 months pregnant!" Adi exclaimed.
"Well, lets make that 9 months!" Mace announced as he reached for more Smore's.
"I'm gonna hit the sack early," Plo announced.
"Me too," Ki-Adi chimed in.
***
"Wake up," Plo whispered to Ki-Adi. "Mace and Adi are asleep!"
"You sure?" Ki-Adi asked.
"Positive," Plo replied. "Pull out the big guns."
Plo and Ki-Adi opened their bags, revealing that they were full of fireworks.
"Operation Floppy Bunny Ears has begun!" Ki-Adi announced.
***
"Look whose cranky this morning," Plo announced.
"Yah, it looks like two people woke up on the wrong side of the sleeping bag this morning," Ki-Adi chimed in.
'Its not our fault that some kids blew our tents up with fireworks!" Mace exclaimed.
"Yah, well at least our fireworks helped burn off all the weight you put on last night," Ki-Adi replied.
"Our fireworks?" Adi asked, suspicious.
"You imbecile!" Plo exclaimed.
"Oops!" Ki-Adi replied.
"Get them!" Mace yelled as Adi and he ran after the fleeing Plo and Ki-Adi.
***
"Now its time to canoe back to the ship," Mace announced.
"C.c.canoe?!" Adi exclaimed in fear. "In the water?!"
"Yes, in the water," Mace replied. "Where else would you canoe?"
"B.b.but, what if I fall in?!" Adi asked.
"Its only water, Adi," Mace replied.
"Its water! I could drown!" Adi shrieked.
"It's the same stuff that makes up over half of your body," Mace explained.
"There's water inside of me?! Get it out of me!" Adi screamed as she began to claw at her stomach.
Mace signaled to Plo for him to knock Adi out. The three masters got into their canoes, carrying Adi along with them. They started down the river, but before they went one mile, they realized they had made one fatal mistake. There was a waterfall between them and their ship.
As the masters went over the waterfall, Adi screamed, "I told you water wants to kill you!"
***
Plo Koon pulled himself from the water and surveyed his surroundings. He was the only survivor of the four masters.
"Darn, you all didn't die!" a small, green midget exclaimed. "I put that waterfall there to kill all four of you!"
"Who are you?" Plo asked.
"I am Darth Yoda, Dark Lord of the Sith," the midget replied. "Now, my plankton army will destroy you!"
Hundreds of giant, mutant plankton emerged from the water and charged Plo . only to try to rub Plo to death.
"Oops. I guess this batch came without teeth and claws," Darth Yoda exclaimed.
"Now, Sith, you will die," Plo announced.
Plo withdrew a guitar from his robes, grabbed a guitar pick from his pocket, and began into Alive.
"Nooooo! It's the guitar and pick of the light side!" Darth Yoda screamed.
"The guitar of the light side with built in amp!" Plo corrected.
As Plo played, Darth Yoda and his plankton army disintegrated one by one, until they were all a pile of ashes.
"Aah, don't you love the outdoors?" Mace asked his fellow council members.
The council had been discussing the inflation rate of pierogis when Mace, Adi, Plo, and Ki-Adi decided to go camping.
Now they stood in the middle of nowhere, trying to figure out how to set up their tents.
Mace and Adi noticed that Plo and Ki-Adi were having trouble resisting the urge to light their tent on fire, so Mace said, "Adi and I will set up the tents. You two make a fire."
"F.fire!" Plo and Ki-Adi yelled in unison as they dashed into the forest, searching for firewood.
"Are you sure you should have done that?" Adi asked. "They might go and burn down the forest."
"Don't worry, we have plenty of water," Mace replied.
"W.w.water?" Adi asked nervously. "Water, where?"
"In the river down the hill," Mace replied.
"Just keep the water down there," Adi replied.
***
The four Jedi Masters sat around the fire, eating Smore's and listening to each other tell ghost stories.
"I love Smore's," Mace stated, patting his stomach, which had swollen to many times its normal size.
"Mace, if I hadn't seen you eat all those Smore's, I would swear that you were 8 months pregnant!" Adi exclaimed.
"Well, lets make that 9 months!" Mace announced as he reached for more Smore's.
"I'm gonna hit the sack early," Plo announced.
"Me too," Ki-Adi chimed in.
***
"Wake up," Plo whispered to Ki-Adi. "Mace and Adi are asleep!"
"You sure?" Ki-Adi asked.
"Positive," Plo replied. "Pull out the big guns."
Plo and Ki-Adi opened their bags, revealing that they were full of fireworks.
"Operation Floppy Bunny Ears has begun!" Ki-Adi announced.
***
"Look whose cranky this morning," Plo announced.
"Yah, it looks like two people woke up on the wrong side of the sleeping bag this morning," Ki-Adi chimed in.
'Its not our fault that some kids blew our tents up with fireworks!" Mace exclaimed.
"Yah, well at least our fireworks helped burn off all the weight you put on last night," Ki-Adi replied.
"Our fireworks?" Adi asked, suspicious.
"You imbecile!" Plo exclaimed.
"Oops!" Ki-Adi replied.
"Get them!" Mace yelled as Adi and he ran after the fleeing Plo and Ki-Adi.
***
"Now its time to canoe back to the ship," Mace announced.
"C.c.canoe?!" Adi exclaimed in fear. "In the water?!"
"Yes, in the water," Mace replied. "Where else would you canoe?"
"B.b.but, what if I fall in?!" Adi asked.
"Its only water, Adi," Mace replied.
"Its water! I could drown!" Adi shrieked.
"It's the same stuff that makes up over half of your body," Mace explained.
"There's water inside of me?! Get it out of me!" Adi screamed as she began to claw at her stomach.
Mace signaled to Plo for him to knock Adi out. The three masters got into their canoes, carrying Adi along with them. They started down the river, but before they went one mile, they realized they had made one fatal mistake. There was a waterfall between them and their ship.
As the masters went over the waterfall, Adi screamed, "I told you water wants to kill you!"
***
Plo Koon pulled himself from the water and surveyed his surroundings. He was the only survivor of the four masters.
"Darn, you all didn't die!" a small, green midget exclaimed. "I put that waterfall there to kill all four of you!"
"Who are you?" Plo asked.
"I am Darth Yoda, Dark Lord of the Sith," the midget replied. "Now, my plankton army will destroy you!"
Hundreds of giant, mutant plankton emerged from the water and charged Plo . only to try to rub Plo to death.
"Oops. I guess this batch came without teeth and claws," Darth Yoda exclaimed.
"Now, Sith, you will die," Plo announced.
Plo withdrew a guitar from his robes, grabbed a guitar pick from his pocket, and began into Alive.
"Nooooo! It's the guitar and pick of the light side!" Darth Yoda screamed.
"The guitar of the light side with built in amp!" Plo corrected.
As Plo played, Darth Yoda and his plankton army disintegrated one by one, until they were all a pile of ashes.