Disclaimer: Don't own em, never will.
Spoilers: There are none. Teach me Tonight never happened. Jess is still here. And how he gets hurt is similar to the accident in Teach me Tonight, but is in no way connected to it. So this is basically a 2nd season AU.
A/N: All that is between // // is Lorelai on the phone.
The Hospital
"No."
"I will die from coffee withdrawal."
"No," Luke said. "You will die from to much coffee. I refuse to be responsible for your death."
"That line is gettin old. You're gonna have to think of something new."
Luke rolled his eyes.
"Come on Luke, everyone knows what will happen. I'll keep buggin you, and you'll give me coffee. Because no one can say no to me. I am coffee queen!"
"No."
"Yes."
"No."
"Do I have to come back there and get it myself?" Lorelai started to get up.
"Don't even think about it."
"Hmmm...I'm thinkin about it. What are ya gonna do about it?"
Luke sighed and handed Lorelai a mug of coffee.
"Ha! I am coffee queen! Bow down to me!"
"If you say so." Luke said.
"I say so."
"Where's Rory?"
"With Dean. Where's Jess?"
"Detention."
"Ohhhh. Is it still scary? Does some mean teacher sit in front of the room staring at you. And give you another detention if you move even an inch?"
"I dunno."
"Can I have a refill?" Lorelai asked.
"I just gave you a full mug."
"Yeah, but I took a sip, now it's not full anymore."
"New rule. No refills."
Lorelai gasped. "No! You can't put a limit on coffee! There has to be a law against it. I could have you arrested."
The phone rang.
"See it's the cops calling to make you give me more coffee."
Luke picked up the phone. "Hello? Yeah...what...I'll be right there." he hung up.
"Out! Everybody out!" he shouted at everyone in the diner.
"What's wrong?" Lorelai asked.
"Jess was hit by a car. He's in the hospital."
"Screw the food!" Lorelai said to Kirk who was still eating. "You heard the man, get out!"
Luke looked at Lorelai "You too."
"I'm driving. The way you drive it'll take all day to get there."
Luke started to say something.
"Shut up. Now go." she pointed to the door.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
"So do you wanna get something to eat?" Dean asked.
"Coffee!" Rory shouted.
"You do realize coffee is a drink right?"
"Actually, my mom made it a food group."
"Why am I not surprised?"
"On to Luke's!" Rory grabbed Dean's hand and dragged him towards her car.
"Why is no one in there?" Dean peered in the window.
"I dunno. Can I use your cell phone to call my mom? She probably knows."
"Sure." Dean handed her the phone.
//"The coffee queen."//
"Mom."
//"Hi Ror, what's up?//
"Why is Luke's closed?"
//"We're at the hospital sweetie."//
"Why? Are you hurt? Is Luke hurt?"
//"Jess was hit by a car."//
"What? How? When? Is he okay?"
//"The doctors haven't told us anything yet."//
"What hospital are you at?"
//"Hartford, but stay with Dean sweetie."//
"Bye mom."
//"Bye Ror."//
"What did she say?" Dean asked.
"Jess was hit by a car."
"Oh."
"I have to go to the hospital."
"Why? He'll be fine."
"Because Jess is my friend."
"You know I don't like that guy."
"Well I'm going."
Dean sighed. "So am I."
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
"Is he okay?" Rory asked running down the hall.
"Honey I told you to stay with Dean."
"I did."
"Hi Lorelai." Dean said, walking up behind Rory.
"Hi Dean."
"Is Jess okay?"
"We don't know."
"Mr. Danes?" a doctor said, standing next to Luke.
"Is he okay?" Luke asked.
"He has a slight concussion, a broken arm, and a few broken ribs."
"That's good right?" Lorelai asked. "Considering he was hit by a car I mean."
"Yes."
"Can we see him?" Rory asked.
"Family only." the doctor said. "He's in room 603, down the hall. I have another patient to check on, if you have any questions ask a nurse." he turned and left.
"I'll distract Dean." Lorelai said.
"But the doctor said-
"You wanna see Jess. Go before I change my mind."
"Okay."
"Hey Dean!" Lorelai stood in front of him. "How are things goin?"
"Okay."
"That's good."
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
"Hey." Rory stuck her head into Jess' room.
"Hey."
She stepped inside. "How are ya feeling?"
"Like I've been hit by a car."
"Right, that would make sense."
"Why are you here?"
"I wanted to see if you were okay."
"How did you know what happened?"
"The diner was closed so I called my mom and she said she and Luke were here."
"If you're mom's here with Luke, how'd you get here?"
"What is this the third degree?" Rory asked.
"I'm bored. How'd you get here?"
"I drove."
A nurse walked in. "Young lady you're not supposed to be here unless you're related."
"I'm um...his cousin."
"So Mr. Danes is you're father?"
"Yeah."
"Is that lady with him your mother?"
"Yes."
"Alright." the nurse left.
Jess laughed. "You cannot lie."
"She believed it, didn't she?"
"Yeah. But it was stupid. Luke's you're dad?"
"It was all I could think of."
"Why'd you lie?"
"Didn't feel like leaving."
Luke walked in.
"If the nurse asks, Rory is your daughter, and Lorelei is your wife." Jess said.
"What?"
"The nurse was gonna make me leave." Rory said. "So I said I was Jess' cousin, making you my dad, and my mom you're wife."
"Umm..."
"Where is my mom?"
"Trying to convince Dean you were abducted by aliens."
"I'll go tell him he can leave. Be right back."
"Hey mom."
"Rory! The aliens gave you back!"
"Um yeah."
"I'm gonna go." Lorelai headed down the hall towards Jess' room.
"Dean you can go. I'm just gonna hang here."
"Come with me."
"Dean I'll see you later. Do you want my car?"
"No, I'll just take the bus."
"Bye." Rory gave him a quick kiss on the cheek and took off down the hall, leaving Dean staring after her.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
"So Rory," Lorelai said. "When are me an Luke goin on our honeymoon?"
"I dunno. What difference does it make?"
"Well If I'm married I want a honeymoon! And I didn't get one. I didn't get a ring either." she glared at Luke.
"We're not married." Luke said.
"Ok, enough." Jess said.
"Why don't you guys go to the cafeteria, it can be your honeymoon." Rory said.
"Ohhhh. How fun. Come on Lukey." she grabbed Luke's arm and dragged him away.
"You know he probably won't give you coffee for doing this to him." Jess said.
"But you'll give me coffee right?" Rory pouted.
"I guess so."
"You guess? Of course you will."
"This place is boring." Jess said.
"Want a book?" Rory pulled two out of her bag.
"What do you have?"
"A book of essays and To Kill a Mockingbird."
"Mockingbird."
She tossed the book on his lap and opened the book of essays.
Jess struggled to hold the book and turn the page with his broken arm. Dropping it he said, "This isn't working."
Rory put her book back in her bag and picked up the one Jess was trying to read. Turning to the first page she began to read aloud.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
"Cool! Story time!" Lorelai shouted coming back into the room.
"How was your honeymoon?" Rory asked closing the book.
"It sucked." Lorelai said. "The coffee was sucky and there was nothing to do."
"Where's Luke?" Jess asked.
"Trying to convince the doctor to let you go home."
"Why can't he?" Rory asked.
"Because the doctor's evil."
"Get up, we're leaving." Luke stood in the doorway.
"Finally." Jess struggled to get up, wincing in pain.
Rory stuck out her hand and Jess took it with his good arm. She pulled him up.
The four of the made their way to the parking lot.
"My jeeps over here." Lorelai said.
"My car's on the other side of the parking lot." Rory said. "See ya at the diner." she headed towards her car. Jess followed.
"Where are you going?" Luke shouted after him.
"With Rory." Jess shouted back, and hurried to catch up with her.
Spoilers: There are none. Teach me Tonight never happened. Jess is still here. And how he gets hurt is similar to the accident in Teach me Tonight, but is in no way connected to it. So this is basically a 2nd season AU.
A/N: All that is between // // is Lorelai on the phone.
The Hospital
"No."
"I will die from coffee withdrawal."
"No," Luke said. "You will die from to much coffee. I refuse to be responsible for your death."
"That line is gettin old. You're gonna have to think of something new."
Luke rolled his eyes.
"Come on Luke, everyone knows what will happen. I'll keep buggin you, and you'll give me coffee. Because no one can say no to me. I am coffee queen!"
"No."
"Yes."
"No."
"Do I have to come back there and get it myself?" Lorelai started to get up.
"Don't even think about it."
"Hmmm...I'm thinkin about it. What are ya gonna do about it?"
Luke sighed and handed Lorelai a mug of coffee.
"Ha! I am coffee queen! Bow down to me!"
"If you say so." Luke said.
"I say so."
"Where's Rory?"
"With Dean. Where's Jess?"
"Detention."
"Ohhhh. Is it still scary? Does some mean teacher sit in front of the room staring at you. And give you another detention if you move even an inch?"
"I dunno."
"Can I have a refill?" Lorelai asked.
"I just gave you a full mug."
"Yeah, but I took a sip, now it's not full anymore."
"New rule. No refills."
Lorelai gasped. "No! You can't put a limit on coffee! There has to be a law against it. I could have you arrested."
The phone rang.
"See it's the cops calling to make you give me more coffee."
Luke picked up the phone. "Hello? Yeah...what...I'll be right there." he hung up.
"Out! Everybody out!" he shouted at everyone in the diner.
"What's wrong?" Lorelai asked.
"Jess was hit by a car. He's in the hospital."
"Screw the food!" Lorelai said to Kirk who was still eating. "You heard the man, get out!"
Luke looked at Lorelai "You too."
"I'm driving. The way you drive it'll take all day to get there."
Luke started to say something.
"Shut up. Now go." she pointed to the door.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
"So do you wanna get something to eat?" Dean asked.
"Coffee!" Rory shouted.
"You do realize coffee is a drink right?"
"Actually, my mom made it a food group."
"Why am I not surprised?"
"On to Luke's!" Rory grabbed Dean's hand and dragged him towards her car.
"Why is no one in there?" Dean peered in the window.
"I dunno. Can I use your cell phone to call my mom? She probably knows."
"Sure." Dean handed her the phone.
//"The coffee queen."//
"Mom."
//"Hi Ror, what's up?//
"Why is Luke's closed?"
//"We're at the hospital sweetie."//
"Why? Are you hurt? Is Luke hurt?"
//"Jess was hit by a car."//
"What? How? When? Is he okay?"
//"The doctors haven't told us anything yet."//
"What hospital are you at?"
//"Hartford, but stay with Dean sweetie."//
"Bye mom."
//"Bye Ror."//
"What did she say?" Dean asked.
"Jess was hit by a car."
"Oh."
"I have to go to the hospital."
"Why? He'll be fine."
"Because Jess is my friend."
"You know I don't like that guy."
"Well I'm going."
Dean sighed. "So am I."
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
"Is he okay?" Rory asked running down the hall.
"Honey I told you to stay with Dean."
"I did."
"Hi Lorelai." Dean said, walking up behind Rory.
"Hi Dean."
"Is Jess okay?"
"We don't know."
"Mr. Danes?" a doctor said, standing next to Luke.
"Is he okay?" Luke asked.
"He has a slight concussion, a broken arm, and a few broken ribs."
"That's good right?" Lorelai asked. "Considering he was hit by a car I mean."
"Yes."
"Can we see him?" Rory asked.
"Family only." the doctor said. "He's in room 603, down the hall. I have another patient to check on, if you have any questions ask a nurse." he turned and left.
"I'll distract Dean." Lorelai said.
"But the doctor said-
"You wanna see Jess. Go before I change my mind."
"Okay."
"Hey Dean!" Lorelai stood in front of him. "How are things goin?"
"Okay."
"That's good."
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
"Hey." Rory stuck her head into Jess' room.
"Hey."
She stepped inside. "How are ya feeling?"
"Like I've been hit by a car."
"Right, that would make sense."
"Why are you here?"
"I wanted to see if you were okay."
"How did you know what happened?"
"The diner was closed so I called my mom and she said she and Luke were here."
"If you're mom's here with Luke, how'd you get here?"
"What is this the third degree?" Rory asked.
"I'm bored. How'd you get here?"
"I drove."
A nurse walked in. "Young lady you're not supposed to be here unless you're related."
"I'm um...his cousin."
"So Mr. Danes is you're father?"
"Yeah."
"Is that lady with him your mother?"
"Yes."
"Alright." the nurse left.
Jess laughed. "You cannot lie."
"She believed it, didn't she?"
"Yeah. But it was stupid. Luke's you're dad?"
"It was all I could think of."
"Why'd you lie?"
"Didn't feel like leaving."
Luke walked in.
"If the nurse asks, Rory is your daughter, and Lorelei is your wife." Jess said.
"What?"
"The nurse was gonna make me leave." Rory said. "So I said I was Jess' cousin, making you my dad, and my mom you're wife."
"Umm..."
"Where is my mom?"
"Trying to convince Dean you were abducted by aliens."
"I'll go tell him he can leave. Be right back."
"Hey mom."
"Rory! The aliens gave you back!"
"Um yeah."
"I'm gonna go." Lorelai headed down the hall towards Jess' room.
"Dean you can go. I'm just gonna hang here."
"Come with me."
"Dean I'll see you later. Do you want my car?"
"No, I'll just take the bus."
"Bye." Rory gave him a quick kiss on the cheek and took off down the hall, leaving Dean staring after her.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
"So Rory," Lorelai said. "When are me an Luke goin on our honeymoon?"
"I dunno. What difference does it make?"
"Well If I'm married I want a honeymoon! And I didn't get one. I didn't get a ring either." she glared at Luke.
"We're not married." Luke said.
"Ok, enough." Jess said.
"Why don't you guys go to the cafeteria, it can be your honeymoon." Rory said.
"Ohhhh. How fun. Come on Lukey." she grabbed Luke's arm and dragged him away.
"You know he probably won't give you coffee for doing this to him." Jess said.
"But you'll give me coffee right?" Rory pouted.
"I guess so."
"You guess? Of course you will."
"This place is boring." Jess said.
"Want a book?" Rory pulled two out of her bag.
"What do you have?"
"A book of essays and To Kill a Mockingbird."
"Mockingbird."
She tossed the book on his lap and opened the book of essays.
Jess struggled to hold the book and turn the page with his broken arm. Dropping it he said, "This isn't working."
Rory put her book back in her bag and picked up the one Jess was trying to read. Turning to the first page she began to read aloud.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
"Cool! Story time!" Lorelai shouted coming back into the room.
"How was your honeymoon?" Rory asked closing the book.
"It sucked." Lorelai said. "The coffee was sucky and there was nothing to do."
"Where's Luke?" Jess asked.
"Trying to convince the doctor to let you go home."
"Why can't he?" Rory asked.
"Because the doctor's evil."
"Get up, we're leaving." Luke stood in the doorway.
"Finally." Jess struggled to get up, wincing in pain.
Rory stuck out her hand and Jess took it with his good arm. She pulled him up.
The four of the made their way to the parking lot.
"My jeeps over here." Lorelai said.
"My car's on the other side of the parking lot." Rory said. "See ya at the diner." she headed towards her car. Jess followed.
"Where are you going?" Luke shouted after him.
"With Rory." Jess shouted back, and hurried to catch up with her.