a/n:  I'm soooooo sorry that I haven't updated (don't blame me, blame Algebra)  I want to thank my brother, "The Joiner"  for co-writing this fic with me.  Also, big thanks to our 42 (!) reviewers!  You guys kick @$$!   As usual, we own absolutely nothing :-(. 

Please keep reviewing!  We love to hear from you!  Except flames, flames are bad, because, "Only YOU can prevent forest fires".  Listen to Smokey.  Smokey knows all.

Now on with the fic!

*

(During the break... Draco is strapped to his chair by big scary looking guys. Lucius is pounding on the door demanding to be allowed in to help his "baby-poo".  The death eaters are consoling each other about loosing the last game and making new "Wea Luv U Drakckco" signs (their old ones were used as a gigantic tissue for Draco when he got the moldy banana).  Hermione and Scott are flirting shamelessly, and Harry and Ron are kinda staring into space...)

(Camera focuses on Scott (who is to busy flirting with Hermione to care).  When 15 seconds go by without him noticing, Harry stands up and walks over to the camera.)

Harry:  Welcome back to Whose Line is it Anyway? – Harry Potter Edition!  I'm Harry Potter, your substitute host as long as lover boy keeps putting the moves on Hermione. 

(Hermione whacks him over the head with her purse and goes back to her chair.  Scott, on the other hand, removes Harry from the camera sight in a bodily fashion, runs his hand through his over gelled hair, and smiles at the camera)

Scott:  Thank you OH so much Harry.  What a gosh darn wonderful host you make. 

Voldemort: Scott!  Daddy is shocked!  Daddy brought you up never to tell a lie!  What are you going to do now young man?

Death Eater 1: I'm askin' ya m'lord, where is the respect in the youth of today?

Death Eater 2: Honestly...

Death Eaters: MANNERS MATTER!  (wave "Draco" signs for no apparent reason)

Scott: Shut it Pops. 

Voldemort: DON'T CALL ME POPS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  GRRR...

Scott: Whatever.  Our next game is called "Whose Line".  What happens, is Harry and Ron are going to act out a scene, inserting these lines, written by the audience, here and there.   (Harry and Ron stand up and walk center stage.  Harry tries to stick his tongue out at Scott unnoticeably, but fails, causing another "manners" lecture from the Death Eaters)  Your scene is, Harry you are Professor Dumbledore telling Ron, as Voldemort off. 

Voldemort:  Hee hee!  I'm mentioned!  Yay!

Entire Cast: SHUT THE #$%@ UP!!!!! 

Voldemort: (sniffles) I'm so hurt... WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!  (sobs into a "Draco" sign (a/n: wow, with the amount of these being made as tissues, I bet it would bring in a pretty good profit (laughs evilly)))

Ron: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!  I WILL SOON TAKE OVER HOGWARTS AND THERE'S NOTHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT DUMBLEDORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Harry: Oh... would you mind wiping your feet on the mat?  Mr. Filch won't be happy if you track mud all over the castle.  If you insist on leading barbaric raids you can at least do it in a civilized fashion. 

Ron: HAHAHA!  I laugh in your face!  And in situations in which we evil people laugh in people's faces, we have a little saying that goes some thing like this. (holds out peace of paper)  The evil bunnies is coming!  The evil bunnies is coming! 

Voldemort: NO!  THAT'S NOT RIGHT!  IT'S... The dastardly ducks is approaching!

Death Eaters: (nod in sage like consent)

Hermione:  Shouldn't that be "the evil bunnies are coming" and "the dastardly ducks are approaching"?

Ron, Voldemort, and Death Eaters: NO!!!!!!!!!

Scott: It's okay Hermi, I know you're right!

Hermione: (makes kissy lips at Scott and mouths "later")

Harry: (rolls eyes) I WAS wondering about those evil bunny traps you planted outside.

Ron: WE MUST PROTECT OURSELVES!!!!!!!! 

Harry: Come down Voldy!  Ya know, there's this old Hogwarts saying, that goes something like this; (holds out piece of paper) big scary Cornish Pixies shall throw us all into the potions classroom!

Lockhart: (stands up in audience) You can thank MOI for that beautiful saying.  Buy my new book!

Ron: Aren't you supposed to have lost your memory?

Harry: I wish...

Voldemort: Say... have you ever considered a career in the Dark Arts.  We offer ample employee benefits, such as lots of chances to irritate Harry Potter.

Lockhart: Why would I want to do that?

Voldemort: Just play along dunderhead. 

Lockhart: Kay!

Ron: (looking up from shaking his head) Watch out!  Hear they come!

Harry: Who?

Ron: THE CORNISH PIXIES!

Harry: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!  (both of them fling themselves onto the floor and begin rolling around like maniacs.)

Ron:  Adavra Kedavra! 

Harry: THERE GONE! YAY!  Now what were you saying Voldy?

Ron: Oh yes, there's this thing Salazar Slytherin would have wanted us to consider.  It is (holds out piece of paper) WOOHOOHOOHOOHOOHOOHOOHOOHOOHOOHOOHOOHOOHOOHOOHOOHOOHOO! 

Kefka: WAAAAAAAAAHHH!  THAT'S MY LAUGH!  Give it back you meanies!  (starts shrieking at the top of his lungs as the cast of Final Fantasy 6 covers their respective ears.)

Celes: Is torturing him worth this?

Locke: Let me think for a second...

Voldemort: I'm afraid I will have to punish you, clown boy.

Kefka: *sniffles loudly* why?

Voldemort: BECAUSE I-I AM THE ONLY PERSON IN THE WORLD WHO IS ALLOWED TO HAVE AN EVIL LAUGH!  DO YOU HEAR ME!

Death Eaters: (pick Kefka up and kick his butt out of the auditorium)

Rest of audience: (applaud)

Scott: *buzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz* That's quite enough. (rubs his forehead)  Now to a commercial break. 

(cameras turn off)

Scott, Hermione, and Draco: Asprin... please asprin...!

COMMERCIAL

(LOST CHILDREN flashes across the scene, and Lucius Malfoy walks in)

Lucius: My friends, I ask of you today a simple helping hand in a great cause.  *sniffle* Help us save the abducted children of our area.  Call 1-800-BABY-POO to help. (looks to either side)  Draco?  Pookie?  Hang in there!  Daddy's coming!