A/N: Started a*nother* fic....heh.
It's too hard of a decision. Either way seems to have bad results.
Dean has been there. He's my boyfriend. He's always supportive, and understanding, and patient. He loves me, he says. Do I really feel the same way? I can see it now. A perfect American family. That would be my future with Dean, at least the one I can see. Me, and then my perfect husband. We would lead predictable, stereotypically normal lives, complete with the white picket fence and the dog, and the children at the top of their classes, one boy and one girl.
Both parents with sucessful jobs, but always enough time for their children. A new minivan, to take the children to their various academic, musical, and athletic activities, in which they excel. A car for each parent to take to work. A nice, two story home in Stars Hollow.
It's so plainly layed out that I can't see it any other way. That's what bothers me so much. I see him not as who I enjoy seeing every day, but as who I see every day. Who's there. Something as normal and every day as waking up, brushing my teeth, going to sleep, drinking my morning coffee. That's what I see him as. A routine.
"Hi Dean."
"Hi Rory."
Kiss.
Hug.
Walk.
Why do I feel like I'm missing out?
It's too hard of a decision. Either way seems to have bad results.
Dean has been there. He's my boyfriend. He's always supportive, and understanding, and patient. He loves me, he says. Do I really feel the same way? I can see it now. A perfect American family. That would be my future with Dean, at least the one I can see. Me, and then my perfect husband. We would lead predictable, stereotypically normal lives, complete with the white picket fence and the dog, and the children at the top of their classes, one boy and one girl.
Both parents with sucessful jobs, but always enough time for their children. A new minivan, to take the children to their various academic, musical, and athletic activities, in which they excel. A car for each parent to take to work. A nice, two story home in Stars Hollow.
It's so plainly layed out that I can't see it any other way. That's what bothers me so much. I see him not as who I enjoy seeing every day, but as who I see every day. Who's there. Something as normal and every day as waking up, brushing my teeth, going to sleep, drinking my morning coffee. That's what I see him as. A routine.
"Hi Dean."
"Hi Rory."
Kiss.
Hug.
Walk.
Why do I feel like I'm missing out?