Title: Trivial 8: What's Your Sign?
Author: Kel
Rating: PG for innuendo
Pairing: Clark/Lex
Archive: Knock yourself out
Summary: In Which Clark and Lex discover Everyone's Sign. (I will include the list at the bottom of the fic)
After Sex Comments By Star Signs...
Aries: "Okay, let's do it again!"
Taurus: "I'm hungry -- pass the pizza."
Gemini: "Have you seen the remote?"
Cancer: "When are we getting married?"
Leo: "Wasn't I fantastic?"
Virgo: "I need to wash the sheets."
Libra: "I liked it if you liked it."
Scorpio: "Perhaps I should untie you."
Sagittarius: "Don't call me - I'll call you."
Capricorn: "Do you have a business card?"
Aquarius: "Now let's try it with our clothes off!"
Pisces: "What did you say your name was again?"
Trivial 8: What's Your Sign
"Lex, check it out. I got this in my email this morning. Ryan sent it to me."
"After Sex Comments By Star Signs... what's a kid his age doing with something like this anyway?"
"Don't know. But check it out... we can figure out what sign everyone is."
"We could also do that by birthday."
"Yeah, but this is more fun."
"All right, all right. Let me see that. Oh, there's you. You're a Taurus."
"Oh yeah. I got that right off. But come on, Lex. It's not my fault I always get hungry. You wear me out."
"That's right, always blame the bald guy."
"And look, there's you. Scorpio."
"I am not Scorpio. I am Sagittarius."
"Oooh, that's cold, Lex."
"Trust me, Clark. You don't know the half of it."
"Okay... moving on... what about... Pete?"
"Pete? Leo. Definitely."
*snickering* "Okay. Yeah. Totally. Chloe?"
"Chloe? Aries. That boundless enthusiasm, the quest for new things..."
"Really? I kinda thought Chloe was a Cancer."
"Trust me, Clark. With the way she looks at you? Cancerian traits are *low* on the priority list."
"Kinda like you look at me?"
"Clark... next."
"Lana."
"Now *there's* your Cancer."
"Nuh-uh. Leo."
"That's... brilliant."
"Thank you. Mom?"
"Your mother is Virgo."
"Damn. You didn't even have to think about that one."
"Next."
"Dad."
"Gemini. No question."
"Lex... you're only saying that cause of the whole Nicodemus thing."
"Next."
"Lionel."
"My father?"
"Only Lionel we know."
"Pisces."
"Not Capricorn?"
"Pisces, Clark. Trust me. He's fucked over enough people to be a Pisces ten times over, and I bet he doesn't know half their names."
"Is that everyone?"
"Everyone except Chloe's father."
"Oh, Mr. Sullivan? Yeah, okay. What's Mr. Sullivan?"
"He's a Libra."
"Weird. Cause I think he really *is.*"
"I'm good."
"Yes, you are."
"Want to go play Scorpio and Taurus?"
"Shame on you, Clark. If you want to get laid, all you have to do is say so."
"I want to get laid, Lex."
"Far be it from me to stand in the way. I should have Ryan send you forwards more often if it gets you horny like this."
"I'm always horny, Lex. At least where you're concerned. Although... there is the matter of the Naked Spike..."
"... Naked Spike? Clark... we *will* come back to that later."
The End
Coming up... Harley Davidsons, Bunnies, and Naked Spikes, oh my!
Author: Kel
Rating: PG for innuendo
Pairing: Clark/Lex
Archive: Knock yourself out
Summary: In Which Clark and Lex discover Everyone's Sign. (I will include the list at the bottom of the fic)
After Sex Comments By Star Signs...
Aries: "Okay, let's do it again!"
Taurus: "I'm hungry -- pass the pizza."
Gemini: "Have you seen the remote?"
Cancer: "When are we getting married?"
Leo: "Wasn't I fantastic?"
Virgo: "I need to wash the sheets."
Libra: "I liked it if you liked it."
Scorpio: "Perhaps I should untie you."
Sagittarius: "Don't call me - I'll call you."
Capricorn: "Do you have a business card?"
Aquarius: "Now let's try it with our clothes off!"
Pisces: "What did you say your name was again?"
Trivial 8: What's Your Sign
"Lex, check it out. I got this in my email this morning. Ryan sent it to me."
"After Sex Comments By Star Signs... what's a kid his age doing with something like this anyway?"
"Don't know. But check it out... we can figure out what sign everyone is."
"We could also do that by birthday."
"Yeah, but this is more fun."
"All right, all right. Let me see that. Oh, there's you. You're a Taurus."
"Oh yeah. I got that right off. But come on, Lex. It's not my fault I always get hungry. You wear me out."
"That's right, always blame the bald guy."
"And look, there's you. Scorpio."
"I am not Scorpio. I am Sagittarius."
"Oooh, that's cold, Lex."
"Trust me, Clark. You don't know the half of it."
"Okay... moving on... what about... Pete?"
"Pete? Leo. Definitely."
*snickering* "Okay. Yeah. Totally. Chloe?"
"Chloe? Aries. That boundless enthusiasm, the quest for new things..."
"Really? I kinda thought Chloe was a Cancer."
"Trust me, Clark. With the way she looks at you? Cancerian traits are *low* on the priority list."
"Kinda like you look at me?"
"Clark... next."
"Lana."
"Now *there's* your Cancer."
"Nuh-uh. Leo."
"That's... brilliant."
"Thank you. Mom?"
"Your mother is Virgo."
"Damn. You didn't even have to think about that one."
"Next."
"Dad."
"Gemini. No question."
"Lex... you're only saying that cause of the whole Nicodemus thing."
"Next."
"Lionel."
"My father?"
"Only Lionel we know."
"Pisces."
"Not Capricorn?"
"Pisces, Clark. Trust me. He's fucked over enough people to be a Pisces ten times over, and I bet he doesn't know half their names."
"Is that everyone?"
"Everyone except Chloe's father."
"Oh, Mr. Sullivan? Yeah, okay. What's Mr. Sullivan?"
"He's a Libra."
"Weird. Cause I think he really *is.*"
"I'm good."
"Yes, you are."
"Want to go play Scorpio and Taurus?"
"Shame on you, Clark. If you want to get laid, all you have to do is say so."
"I want to get laid, Lex."
"Far be it from me to stand in the way. I should have Ryan send you forwards more often if it gets you horny like this."
"I'm always horny, Lex. At least where you're concerned. Although... there is the matter of the Naked Spike..."
"... Naked Spike? Clark... we *will* come back to that later."
The End
Coming up... Harley Davidsons, Bunnies, and Naked Spikes, oh my!