Title: Trivial 20: My Long Hair Just Can't Cover Up My Red Neck
Author: Kel
Rating: PGish
Pairing: Clark/Lex
Summary: In Which Clark and Lex Discover Jeff Foxworthy
Notes: To amy, KC, and Ghini... you love my inner redneck.
"Clark. Do you wear your wallet on a chain?"
"Yeah, sometimes."
"Does your family tree fork?"
"I assume so, why?"
"Bear with me, Clark. I'm experimenting."
"Ah."
"Fencing: Olympic event or your best neighbor?"
"Olympic event. Lex, what the hell?"
"I found this series of CDs--I had to buy them for you. Considering your fondness for pickup trucks, WWE wrestling, the Dukes of Hazzard and wearing your wallet on a chain... according to this, you might be a redneck."
"You *just* figured that out?"
"I knew that you were a farmboy, Clark. I just didn't realize your neck was such an alarming shade of red."
"Oh, that's nothing. You should see my Dad."
"Clark, simply because your father is a redneck does not mean that you have to be one. I am cultivating in you appreciations for the finer things."
"Harry Potter twincest?"
"No, Clark. Museums. Art. *Literature.*"
"Gay porn."
"CLARK. Track with me. Please."
"I'm tracking with you just fine, Lex. You think I'm a redneck and I'm laughing my ass off over it while exercising my inner redneck."
"You would."
"Look, it's not the world's worst thing. I just... I find it amusing that Lex Luthor--heir to the LuthorCorp billions and heir to the throne of power--"
"Aren't you being a little theatrical?"
"I'm gay. I'm allowed. As I was saying... I find it amusing that Lex Luthor is dating a redneck. That's all."
"I think I'd rather have you as a redneck than a drama queen, Clark."
"Then I guess that means I have to take back the dress I bought at Fordman's."
"You did *what?*"
"Relax, Lex. I'm jerking your chain. I didn't buy the dress at Fordman's."
"Thank God."
"I bought it at that boutique in Metropolis."
"CLARK!!"
"Gotcha."
End
Author: Kel
Rating: PGish
Pairing: Clark/Lex
Summary: In Which Clark and Lex Discover Jeff Foxworthy
Notes: To amy, KC, and Ghini... you love my inner redneck.
"Clark. Do you wear your wallet on a chain?"
"Yeah, sometimes."
"Does your family tree fork?"
"I assume so, why?"
"Bear with me, Clark. I'm experimenting."
"Ah."
"Fencing: Olympic event or your best neighbor?"
"Olympic event. Lex, what the hell?"
"I found this series of CDs--I had to buy them for you. Considering your fondness for pickup trucks, WWE wrestling, the Dukes of Hazzard and wearing your wallet on a chain... according to this, you might be a redneck."
"You *just* figured that out?"
"I knew that you were a farmboy, Clark. I just didn't realize your neck was such an alarming shade of red."
"Oh, that's nothing. You should see my Dad."
"Clark, simply because your father is a redneck does not mean that you have to be one. I am cultivating in you appreciations for the finer things."
"Harry Potter twincest?"
"No, Clark. Museums. Art. *Literature.*"
"Gay porn."
"CLARK. Track with me. Please."
"I'm tracking with you just fine, Lex. You think I'm a redneck and I'm laughing my ass off over it while exercising my inner redneck."
"You would."
"Look, it's not the world's worst thing. I just... I find it amusing that Lex Luthor--heir to the LuthorCorp billions and heir to the throne of power--"
"Aren't you being a little theatrical?"
"I'm gay. I'm allowed. As I was saying... I find it amusing that Lex Luthor is dating a redneck. That's all."
"I think I'd rather have you as a redneck than a drama queen, Clark."
"Then I guess that means I have to take back the dress I bought at Fordman's."
"You did *what?*"
"Relax, Lex. I'm jerking your chain. I didn't buy the dress at Fordman's."
"Thank God."
"I bought it at that boutique in Metropolis."
"CLARK!!"
"Gotcha."
End