Title: Trivial 28: The Best Part Of Waking Up
Author: Kel
Rating: PG
Pairing: Clark/Lex
Summary: In Which Lex Discovers Clark Before Coffee
Archive: Knock yourself out.
Notes: To Ghini, D, KC, Rogue... and everyone else who can't survive without the morning cup of coffee; let *I'm up, but I don't have to like it!* be our battle cry.
"Morning, Clark."
*monosyllabic grunt*
"Someone hasn't had his morning coffee yet, I see."
*flip off*
"You know, I have never managed to figure out how you can be functional as a manual laborer at five in the morning, and yet still be a complete grouch without coffee."
"Dickwad."
"The grumpy bear speaks. Coffee's on the sideboard, and shouldn't you be in school?"
"Workday."
"Am I going to get more than one word out of you this morning?"
"No."
"Clark, it's nearly noon."
"So?"
"You've been awake for what, nearly six hours?"
"So?"
"I should be receiving a more enthusiastic response than mere grunts."
"Coffee."
"I should have realized this disturbing addiction when I found you at the Beanery and the Talon, drinking coffee at nine-thirty at night."
"Fuck off."
"Oh, I got two words. One of the foul, but still... I got two words."
"Give me the coffee and nobody gets hurt."
"Amazing the rejuvenational powers of a simple Colombian coffee bean."
"If you lecture me on coffee this morning, I'm leaving."
"Just thinking that I should have invested in Folgers the way you're sucking that down."
"Bite me."
"Will I taste coffee?"
"Kiss my ass, Mr. Valdez."
"You know how he's always leading an ass around..."
"Don't even go there."
"Well, if I'm Juan Valdez--"
"Do you *want* me to spill hot coffee in your crotch?"
"You wouldn't."
"Try me."
The End
Author: Kel
Rating: PG
Pairing: Clark/Lex
Summary: In Which Lex Discovers Clark Before Coffee
Archive: Knock yourself out.
Notes: To Ghini, D, KC, Rogue... and everyone else who can't survive without the morning cup of coffee; let *I'm up, but I don't have to like it!* be our battle cry.
"Morning, Clark."
*monosyllabic grunt*
"Someone hasn't had his morning coffee yet, I see."
*flip off*
"You know, I have never managed to figure out how you can be functional as a manual laborer at five in the morning, and yet still be a complete grouch without coffee."
"Dickwad."
"The grumpy bear speaks. Coffee's on the sideboard, and shouldn't you be in school?"
"Workday."
"Am I going to get more than one word out of you this morning?"
"No."
"Clark, it's nearly noon."
"So?"
"You've been awake for what, nearly six hours?"
"So?"
"I should be receiving a more enthusiastic response than mere grunts."
"Coffee."
"I should have realized this disturbing addiction when I found you at the Beanery and the Talon, drinking coffee at nine-thirty at night."
"Fuck off."
"Oh, I got two words. One of the foul, but still... I got two words."
"Give me the coffee and nobody gets hurt."
"Amazing the rejuvenational powers of a simple Colombian coffee bean."
"If you lecture me on coffee this morning, I'm leaving."
"Just thinking that I should have invested in Folgers the way you're sucking that down."
"Bite me."
"Will I taste coffee?"
"Kiss my ass, Mr. Valdez."
"You know how he's always leading an ass around..."
"Don't even go there."
"Well, if I'm Juan Valdez--"
"Do you *want* me to spill hot coffee in your crotch?"
"You wouldn't."
"Try me."
The End