Title: Trivial 47: Separation Anxiety
Author: Kel
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Clark/Lex
Summary: In Which Absence Makes The Heart Grow Fonder
Archive: Knock Yourself Out
Notes: For Amy, cause I love her, she rocks, and she's my goddess. Even though she won't admit it. And oh yeah... Fearless Leader of the Bunnypack.
*ring* *ring* *ring*
"Hello?"
"Martha! Hi, it's Lex. Is Clark around?"
"Sure, Lex. Let me call him." *muffled* "Clark, honey, telephone! It's Lex!" *clearly* "He'll be here--here he is." *muffled* "How many times have I told you not to run in the house?"
*muffled* "Sorry, Mom. I'm taking this up in my room, okay?"
*muffled* "Okay, sweetie. I'll call you if we need you."
"Your mother is a trusting soul, letting her son talk to the local pariah unsupervised in his room. There's no telling what unspeakable acts I could convince you to partake in away from their protective ears."
"There's no way I'm letting my mother hear me call you all the bad bad names I'm going to call you."
"I'm guessing that's a positive answer."
"To?"
"Whether or not you got my package."
"I got your fucking package *right* here, Lex."
"I'm touched, Clark."
"I'm *going* to touch you once you get back from Metropolis."
"You sound... cranky."
"Try *frustrated,* Lex. Like you wouldn't *believe.*"
"Oh, I'd believe it, Clark. I've done it before."
"Yeah, well, I'm gathering that. Are you calling *just* to torment me about it?"
"Yes."
"Oh yeah?"
"Yes. I'm calling to give you a choice. You can... take the plug out and *not* have one off, *OR* you can have one off and leave the plug in until I come home in the morning and take it out myself."
"Not much of a choice there, Lex."
"And I want to listen while you do whichever you want to do. Humor me, Clark. I've got another meeting with my father in an hour, an hour I'd much rather be spending with you."
"And what time tomorrow morning are you getting home?"
"Eleven, I hope. Only my father would do a 7 AM meeting on Saturday morning."
"Fuck, Lex."
"I can hear you wiggling, Clark."
"Asshole. You know what I'm going to do."
"Yes, I do."
"Fuck." *unzip* "You don't know how hard it's been all day, Lex. I'm pretty sure I blew two pop quizzes and I totally zoned in Mr. Jackson's history class."
"As long as it wasn't anyone else you blew, I'm okay with the pop quizzes."
"Oh, yeah, can't you... fucking Jesus... hear the explanation? Mom, Dad, I'm sorry I blew those quizzes but I had Lex's sex toy up my ass all day and I couldn't think straight?"
"Clark... you're *not* straight. Why should you be thinking straight?"
*heavy panting, grunting* "Talk... Lex. Just... talk. Your voice... so hot."
"I'm getting tired of my father's bullshit. He's determined to make my life utterly fucking miserable. Dragging me to Metropolis on a whim, putting me through meeting after meeting on the crap factory. It's just getting out of hand."
"God... fuck... did you... think about me?" *grunting and swearing*
"Constantly, lover. I spent my afternoon break locked in the office thinking of you."
*grunting, quiet moaning* "Lex!!"
"That's good, Clark. Thank you; I needed to hear your voice."
"Hey, Lex?"
"Yes, Clark."
"I miss you too. Hurry home."
"I will, Clark. You have my word. As soon as I can."
"I love you, Lex."
"I love you too, Clark." *pause* "Goodnight."
"Night."
"You didn't hang up."
"Yeah, well, neither did you."
"Goodnight, Clark." *click*
The End
Author: Kel
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Clark/Lex
Summary: In Which Absence Makes The Heart Grow Fonder
Archive: Knock Yourself Out
Notes: For Amy, cause I love her, she rocks, and she's my goddess. Even though she won't admit it. And oh yeah... Fearless Leader of the Bunnypack.
*ring* *ring* *ring*
"Hello?"
"Martha! Hi, it's Lex. Is Clark around?"
"Sure, Lex. Let me call him." *muffled* "Clark, honey, telephone! It's Lex!" *clearly* "He'll be here--here he is." *muffled* "How many times have I told you not to run in the house?"
*muffled* "Sorry, Mom. I'm taking this up in my room, okay?"
*muffled* "Okay, sweetie. I'll call you if we need you."
"Your mother is a trusting soul, letting her son talk to the local pariah unsupervised in his room. There's no telling what unspeakable acts I could convince you to partake in away from their protective ears."
"There's no way I'm letting my mother hear me call you all the bad bad names I'm going to call you."
"I'm guessing that's a positive answer."
"To?"
"Whether or not you got my package."
"I got your fucking package *right* here, Lex."
"I'm touched, Clark."
"I'm *going* to touch you once you get back from Metropolis."
"You sound... cranky."
"Try *frustrated,* Lex. Like you wouldn't *believe.*"
"Oh, I'd believe it, Clark. I've done it before."
"Yeah, well, I'm gathering that. Are you calling *just* to torment me about it?"
"Yes."
"Oh yeah?"
"Yes. I'm calling to give you a choice. You can... take the plug out and *not* have one off, *OR* you can have one off and leave the plug in until I come home in the morning and take it out myself."
"Not much of a choice there, Lex."
"And I want to listen while you do whichever you want to do. Humor me, Clark. I've got another meeting with my father in an hour, an hour I'd much rather be spending with you."
"And what time tomorrow morning are you getting home?"
"Eleven, I hope. Only my father would do a 7 AM meeting on Saturday morning."
"Fuck, Lex."
"I can hear you wiggling, Clark."
"Asshole. You know what I'm going to do."
"Yes, I do."
"Fuck." *unzip* "You don't know how hard it's been all day, Lex. I'm pretty sure I blew two pop quizzes and I totally zoned in Mr. Jackson's history class."
"As long as it wasn't anyone else you blew, I'm okay with the pop quizzes."
"Oh, yeah, can't you... fucking Jesus... hear the explanation? Mom, Dad, I'm sorry I blew those quizzes but I had Lex's sex toy up my ass all day and I couldn't think straight?"
"Clark... you're *not* straight. Why should you be thinking straight?"
*heavy panting, grunting* "Talk... Lex. Just... talk. Your voice... so hot."
"I'm getting tired of my father's bullshit. He's determined to make my life utterly fucking miserable. Dragging me to Metropolis on a whim, putting me through meeting after meeting on the crap factory. It's just getting out of hand."
"God... fuck... did you... think about me?" *grunting and swearing*
"Constantly, lover. I spent my afternoon break locked in the office thinking of you."
*grunting, quiet moaning* "Lex!!"
"That's good, Clark. Thank you; I needed to hear your voice."
"Hey, Lex?"
"Yes, Clark."
"I miss you too. Hurry home."
"I will, Clark. You have my word. As soon as I can."
"I love you, Lex."
"I love you too, Clark." *pause* "Goodnight."
"Night."
"You didn't hang up."
"Yeah, well, neither did you."
"Goodnight, Clark." *click*
The End