January 8th 2002, 10:00
Dear Dairy-
Mom asked me all about school, as if she really cared. Back home she was always too busy with work to care about me and school. Now she thinks that it's all her fault that I was the way I was. So she quit her job, and brought us all down here to Hick town Usa.
I want to be back home. Back with all my friends going to the parties everynight, going to the street races, theres nothing like the thrill of driveing fast knowing that at any minute the cops could show up and take you all "down town". All the kids do here is go cow tipping.
My family has tottaly changed too. Both mom and dad quit their jobs to move here. Dad was, well still is a high class surgeon. Mom was this big desighner, top of the buisness. So of course they never had time for a "family". I always wondered why they even had kids.. Back home me and Aaron would do anyhting that we wanted to. Well, I did that is. Aaron is too goody goody to do drugs, or drink. Thats why mom and dad like him so much.
Well now, mom just works at this little store in down town hickville.. So she's home alot now. As soon as I got home today she asked how school was, and if I had homework. And is seriously comeing in and checking me me every two seconds. I can understand why she didn't trust me back in la la land, but here I have no access to the drugs like I did there. And now shes yelling at me to go to bed.. Who knows, maybe god will turn out to be real, and I will wake up back home and out of this nightmere.
~*~Tuesday~*~
January 10th 2002,
Dear Diary-
I would of written yesterday, but I was too busy. First there was school, it was alright, some girl Tabitha started talking to me today. She's really nice, and let me eat lunch with her and some of her other friends.
But after school, some lady who has had more plastic sergery done to her then ever thought possible, threw a "neighborhood" party to welcome us to the block. My mom made me go, it was so boreing I just found a couch hidden in the corner of the room and listen to music.
20 minutes into my Linkin Park CD, as I sat with my eyes closed practicly falling alseep, when I felt a tap on the shoulder, I opend my eyes and jumped. Jack was sitting face to face with me. I haistly took my head phones off,
"How long have you been sitting there?" I asked,
"Bout 10 minutes," he lied. I stared him down, "Heh, ok you got me, only about 2 minutes.." I smiled weakly, and looked over to the wall, where a picture of a badly sketched nacked woman hung.
"So what are you listening to?" He asked, I looked down at the cd player as if I had to remind my self,
"Linkin Park." I said
"Cool.. but isn't this party kinda for you?" He pointed out,
"Yea, so.." I stated, wondering if he had a point.
"Well shoudn't you be out there "mingling" or something?" He asked, looking over to where Chase, my stupid little brother was. He was talking to some woman who was one of those people who can't handle getting older so they dress like they are 20 when we all know that they are like 46 or something. I just rolled my eyes at him, and broght my attetention back to Jack.
"I am mingling.. I'm talking to you arnt I?" I pointed out, letting my sarceastic personalyity out. I saw his face change, he really seemed like he wanted to get a conversatioin going, so I smartend up and apologised.
"I'm sorry, it's just that I really don't want to be here, I mean here in Texas. I want to be back home with all my friends.. I just need time to adjust I guess." His eyes turned sympatic.
"I understand.. Well kinda." He changed his answer when he saw the look of doubt I was giveing him. "I moved here from Dallas, it was hard too. But the people here are really nice, you just have to give them a chance." Wow, if only my mom had said something like that to me, maybe I would be adjusting better. Anyways, he then started asking me questions. Like why I moved. And it wasn't like I was going to strait up and tell him that I for one got kicked out of St. Peters, the prison of a school that I used to go to, becuase I was caught with Pot and Ecstacy in my closet along with my ex-boyfriend.
"It's complicated." I started out. "My mom just thought that I.. er we needed a change." Yea, thats it, that was the best asnwer I could give.
The rest of the night, we kinda sat and talked, that is, untill my mom made me get up and talk to some guy that teaches guitar. She made me tell him about how I used to play guitar all the time, and then started discussing when good time for lessons would be. She thinks that I should do after school activities to keep my mind off of L.A. and Shawn my ex.. and oh yea the whole drug thing.
Love Tuseday
Dear Dairy-
Mom asked me all about school, as if she really cared. Back home she was always too busy with work to care about me and school. Now she thinks that it's all her fault that I was the way I was. So she quit her job, and brought us all down here to Hick town Usa.
I want to be back home. Back with all my friends going to the parties everynight, going to the street races, theres nothing like the thrill of driveing fast knowing that at any minute the cops could show up and take you all "down town". All the kids do here is go cow tipping.
My family has tottaly changed too. Both mom and dad quit their jobs to move here. Dad was, well still is a high class surgeon. Mom was this big desighner, top of the buisness. So of course they never had time for a "family". I always wondered why they even had kids.. Back home me and Aaron would do anyhting that we wanted to. Well, I did that is. Aaron is too goody goody to do drugs, or drink. Thats why mom and dad like him so much.
Well now, mom just works at this little store in down town hickville.. So she's home alot now. As soon as I got home today she asked how school was, and if I had homework. And is seriously comeing in and checking me me every two seconds. I can understand why she didn't trust me back in la la land, but here I have no access to the drugs like I did there. And now shes yelling at me to go to bed.. Who knows, maybe god will turn out to be real, and I will wake up back home and out of this nightmere.
~*~Tuesday~*~
January 10th 2002,
Dear Diary-
I would of written yesterday, but I was too busy. First there was school, it was alright, some girl Tabitha started talking to me today. She's really nice, and let me eat lunch with her and some of her other friends.
But after school, some lady who has had more plastic sergery done to her then ever thought possible, threw a "neighborhood" party to welcome us to the block. My mom made me go, it was so boreing I just found a couch hidden in the corner of the room and listen to music.
20 minutes into my Linkin Park CD, as I sat with my eyes closed practicly falling alseep, when I felt a tap on the shoulder, I opend my eyes and jumped. Jack was sitting face to face with me. I haistly took my head phones off,
"How long have you been sitting there?" I asked,
"Bout 10 minutes," he lied. I stared him down, "Heh, ok you got me, only about 2 minutes.." I smiled weakly, and looked over to the wall, where a picture of a badly sketched nacked woman hung.
"So what are you listening to?" He asked, I looked down at the cd player as if I had to remind my self,
"Linkin Park." I said
"Cool.. but isn't this party kinda for you?" He pointed out,
"Yea, so.." I stated, wondering if he had a point.
"Well shoudn't you be out there "mingling" or something?" He asked, looking over to where Chase, my stupid little brother was. He was talking to some woman who was one of those people who can't handle getting older so they dress like they are 20 when we all know that they are like 46 or something. I just rolled my eyes at him, and broght my attetention back to Jack.
"I am mingling.. I'm talking to you arnt I?" I pointed out, letting my sarceastic personalyity out. I saw his face change, he really seemed like he wanted to get a conversatioin going, so I smartend up and apologised.
"I'm sorry, it's just that I really don't want to be here, I mean here in Texas. I want to be back home with all my friends.. I just need time to adjust I guess." His eyes turned sympatic.
"I understand.. Well kinda." He changed his answer when he saw the look of doubt I was giveing him. "I moved here from Dallas, it was hard too. But the people here are really nice, you just have to give them a chance." Wow, if only my mom had said something like that to me, maybe I would be adjusting better. Anyways, he then started asking me questions. Like why I moved. And it wasn't like I was going to strait up and tell him that I for one got kicked out of St. Peters, the prison of a school that I used to go to, becuase I was caught with Pot and Ecstacy in my closet along with my ex-boyfriend.
"It's complicated." I started out. "My mom just thought that I.. er we needed a change." Yea, thats it, that was the best asnwer I could give.
The rest of the night, we kinda sat and talked, that is, untill my mom made me get up and talk to some guy that teaches guitar. She made me tell him about how I used to play guitar all the time, and then started discussing when good time for lessons would be. She thinks that I should do after school activities to keep my mind off of L.A. and Shawn my ex.. and oh yea the whole drug thing.
Love Tuseday