Summary of Final Fantasy Couples in Five Minutes!

by pinkpuruu

...basically... a summary of final fantasy couples in five minutes.

Summary of Final Fantasy Couples In Five Minutes~!
By pinkpuruu and akizuki

DISCLAIMER: The following Final Fantasy characters all belong to Squaresoft and the makers of Final Fantasy. We're just borrowing them for entertainment purposes.

Author's Notes: (How me and akizuki planned this fic)

pinkpuruu: "You know what. I have an hankering for some Final Fantasy fanfics,"
akizuki: "Don't bother. They all suck."
pinkpuruu: "…oh. Then maybe we should write one."
akizuki: "OH~! OH~! I wanna do a 'FF COUPLES IN FIVE MINUTES',"
pinkpuruu: "…sure why not~! ^^"

Yah, so… don't expect much out of this fic. Spur of the moment things, haha.

***

CloudxAeris (FF7)
Cloud: "Hey there…"
Aeris: "Yes?"
Cloud: "So… you're the last Ancient… and I'm kinda like an Ancient… so…"
(pause)
Cloud: "Shouldn't we try… preserving the species?"
(waggles eyebrows)

CloudxAeris2 (FF7)
Cloud: "You know WHAT Aeris?! I went across the entire world, walked a hundred miles, got ALL OF YOUR FRIGGIN LIMIT BREAKS, and then you RUN AWAY LIKE THAT before I could even see you USE THEM!? What kind of relationship are we hav--"
Sephiroth: "(SCHLICK)"
Aeris: *DIES*
Cloud: "ARGH! AGAIN WITH THE LEAVING!"

CloudxTifa (FF7)
Cloud: "Oh Aeris… I love you so… HEY! What …?"
(Sephiroth falls from the sky and stabs Aeris none-too-nicely)
Cloud: "Oh. Damn."
(looks around)
Cloud: "Oh Tiiiiiiiiifa~!"

CidxShera (FF7)
Cid: "DAMNIT SHERA!! WHAT THA HELL IS THA MATTA WITH YA?!"
Shera: "…I'm… sorry…"
Cid: "WHY THE FRIGGIN CAN'T YOU DO THINGS RIGHT…"
Shera: "…I… know…"
(Cid glares, then…)
Cid: "You do it like THIS,"
(grabs Shera and kisses her)

RufusxScarlet (FF8)
Rufus: "…I'm busy. Leave me alone."
Scarlet: "Well, Rufus. Let's put it this way."
(Rufus looks up)
Scarlet: "This ISN'T the most revealing outfit I have."
Rufus: "O.O"

VincentxTifa (FF7)
Tifa: "…Aren't you with Lucrecia?"
Vincent: "…Aren't you with Cloud?"
(same time)
Vincent: "(really fast) Lucrecia-dumped-me-for-another-guy-and-became-his-wacko-experiment-and-gave-birth-to-some-kid-who-happens-to-be-Sephiroth!"
Tifa: "Cloud-sends-me-mixed-signals-and-I-think-that-he-likes-messing-around-with-various-women!"
(stare at each other)
Tifa: "Wow. Another lost soul."

BarretxCloud (FF7)
Cloud: "W-WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING IN MY ROOM?! I thought only Aeris or Tifa would come!!"
Barret: "(evil grin) Things change. Scripts change."

ZellxPigtail Girl (FF8)
Zell: "Y-y-you're… SERIOUS?!"
Pigtail Girl: "(nod)"
Zell: "(throws himself at her feet) I LOVE YOU!!"
Pigtail Girl: "…erm…"
(minutes later)
Zell: "(scarf scarf scarf)"
Pigtail Girl: "(hands him more hotdogs) I should've thought of this months ago… ^^"

ZellxPigtail Girl2 (FF8)
Zell: "What? A present?"
Pigtail Girl: "Y-Yeah... I know you like this series..."
Zell: "The 'PUPURUN' SERIES?! HOLY SHIIIIIIIT! THANKS!!
Pigtail Girl: "I-I was wondering if we could go out tonight...?"
Zell: "YAH! SURE! OF COURSE! O-Oh... but you're missing a book here. Let's go to the bookstore, okay??"

CidxEdea (FF8)
Edea: "…Cid… you … DON'T … mind if I'm a sorcerer, right?"
Cid: "Of course not, dear."
Edea: "Okay. That means, of course, that I'm gonna have to be the dominant figure in this relationship."
Cid: "…?!"
Edea: "Yes. That's right."
Cid: "…"
Edea: "I'm on top."

SquallxRinoa (FF8)
Rinoa: "…I'm with Edea on this one."
Squall: "Damn."

SquallxRinoa2 (FF8)
Rinoa: "Here I am! Where Squall and I promised!"
(Squall - elsewhere)
Squall: "Here I am! Where we promised."
(pause)
Rinoa and Squall: "...Where the hell are they?"

SelphiexIrvine (FF8)
Selphie: "(genkiness)"
Irvine: "(stare… drool)"
Selphie: "Yes, Irvy?"
Irvine: "When you jump… your… (drool)"
Selphie: "Eh?"
Irvine: "…Promise me this. Don't ever wear another outfit. EVER."

LagunaxRaine (FF8)
(during the war against Adel…)
Laguna: "Eh? A letter? From … Raine?"
Letter: "Dear Laguna…"
Laguna: "Aw… she called me 'dear'…"
Letter: "YOU BETTER GET YOUR LAZY ASS BACK TO WINHILL BECAUSE I HAVE YOUR KID!"
Laguna: "O.O"

LagunaxJulia (FF8)
Julia: "…So we meet again."
Laguna: "…Heard… you had a kid."
Julia: "Heard YOU had a kid. TWO!"
Laguna: "UH … UH…"
Julia: "…And I ALSO heard that MY kid loves YOUR kid."
Laguna: "…Uhh…"
Julia: "…Well. A little incest won't hurt…"

SquallxQuistis (FF8)
Squall: "…Butbutbutbut… Rinoa…"
Quistis: "(sly grin) Wouldn't you rather be with an older… and more EXPERIENCED woman?"
Squall: "…"
Quistis: "I have a whip."
Squall: "…O.O…"

ZidanexGarnet (FF9)
Zidane: "OO You're the ONLY girl I love!"
(a line of girls is behind Zidane screaming "I LOVE YOU~!")
Garnet: "…(-__-)…"
Zidane: "I don't know them! I swea… H-hey! Wait!"

ZidanexGarnet2 (FF9)
Garnet: "You promised that I'd get to touch you THERE."
Zidane: "W-W-Wha?? You WANT to?? But but… I'm ticklish…"
Garnet: "You PROMISED!!"
Zidane: "…Uh… okay…"
Garnet: "…Oh… sooofft…"
(strokes tail)

FreyaxFratley (FF9)
Freya: "You don't remember ANYTHING?!"
Fraterly: "Nope. Not a thing."
Freya: "Not even the time we... (whisper whisper whisper)"
Fraterly: "O.O. W-Why don't you refresh my memory?"

VivixQuina (FF9)
Vivi: "...Don't eat me."

TidusxYuna (FFX-2)
Tidus: "H-HOLY CRAP, YUNA! WHAT HAPPENED?!"
Yuna: "Hey... How else could I cope with the depression?"

***