Manipulation
Ok, I've gone into Ryou-angst mode! This is the first of... how many have I thought up? Battle City does that to you... but this is kinda a rantish thing in Ryou's POV.
Set during the... blimp time in the Battle City semi-finals, but before yami no Bakura's duel with Yami no Yuugi.
To manipulate is to influence or control. Manipulation can be for inanimate objects or for animals, or for people even. I should know.
We all know I have mou hitori no boku, right? [1] My other half, the dark one who lives inside of me. I... I hate being manipulated by him. It scares me to be controlled by a force I can do nothing about. But I have gotten used to it, believe it or not. If I just let him do as he wants, so long he doesn't kill my friends, he doesn't hurt me.
Manipulation,
Unable to control myself
As I feel myself swept away
I have no control, just hold on and scream
I know I'm weak; it's been beaten into my head so many times. I am just nothing to the world around me. Does it hurt to know this? Yes. Does it hurt to find this out in real-life situations? Yes. Is there anything I can do about it? No.
Some people say that admitting one is weak is strength. I seriously don't believe it; it's just facing the inevitable truth. Would you believe it, were you in my position?
Would you even be weak enough to be in my position?
Strong, weak, is there a true difference?
When admitting you are weak is a strength
And living with manipulation shows it
And yet there are more manipulators still.
Malik-kun, I think his name was. He too possesses me as if I were just an object. [2] Of course, mou hitori no boku doesn't like the idea of his... yadonushi [3] being controlled by someone besides him, "ore-sama" [4].
Do they know what it's like being controlled, manipulated as I am? Does Yuugi-tachi know how it feels? Yuugi-kun gets along with his half well enough, except for a few arguments here and there. His doesn't forcefully manipulate him like a doll.
Maybe I'm just my other half's version of those Dolls Malik-kun uses to fight Yuugi-kun. [5]
Too many manipulators
So many preying off weakness.
Being used, controlled, a puppet,
Manipulated
Yeah, I am just a puppet. Maybe even a sock puppet, one of those little things children make to play with. I certainly am played with, made to move about with no will of my own. Mou hitori no jibun [1] has made sure I had no will long ago.
He pulls a string and I move with it. If Malik-kun pulled a string, I'd move. He doesn't even need the damn Sennen Rod to move me, just come and take me over as my other half does.
But do puppets feel like they are being used? Even if they are inanimate objects, do they get the overwhelming sense of insecurity that they cannot defend themselves from a hand they must see as a god looming over them? Do they fear this god of theirs and what it may make them do?
I can feel their utter helplessness as the god moves them, not that I am comparing mou hitori no boku to a god, no. And were he prying in my thoughts now, he'd probably kill his poor host, or leave him near death... again.
I am a doll, or a puppet of sorts
I am the marionette to the puppeteer
I lay still as he moves my body for me,
My strings are tugged and I have no choice
I must follow his whim of manipulation
Life isn't supposed to be just about manipulation. One is supposed to be able to choose their own fate. Obviously, mou hitori no boku is not so insightful. Then again, he's impulsive at times, as I've noticed from his dueling while I am shoved into my soul room, to play with the little toys of innocence in there that he scoffs at. He says that even my soul room is that of a girl's. So I have a few stuffed animals? I usually spend a lot of time in there.
Maybe I should just die. If I died, he'd be locked away again and I wouldn't be manipulated. I know if I make some mort of mistake with mou hitori no boku's plans, I could very well die, but still it would be better than being manipulated.
Walk along the sword's edge,
Making no mistakes.
For if I screw up and fall,
I may get cut,
I may bleed and die.
But it's better than being manipulated.
[1]- Mou hitori no boku means 'the other half of me', or 'my other self'. Mou hitori no ore means the same. And mou hitori no jibun means 'other half of myself'.
[2]- Malik, while helping Ryou to the hospital in the anime after Bakura cut open his arm, gains the ability to possess and control Ryou if he sees fit. Poor guy, almost like having two Yamis... Then again, Malik is just a scary Sunflower. (Don't ask)
[3]- King's property. What Bakura calls Ryou. Arigato PM-chan!
[4]- Ore-sama means 'I', but the -sama as more honor upon it. Bakura-kun uses ore-sama while normally one would 'ore'. He just has an ego, the scary Akutenshi.
[5]- Malik uses his Rod to control people and make them fight Yuugi. He does this to Jounouchi and Anzu. Do you know how scary it is to see Malik speaking through Anzu? Anzu with a guy's voice!
Ok, so it wasn't too angsty, just wait till I go into my next one about his friends... hee, he's so torturable... and I'm still mad at Seto-sama.
Seto: Why?
Wildwolf: Cause you told Yami to attack at risk of Ryou-chan's life! Don't you have any compassion.
Yami: He does! It's spelt M-O-K-U-B-A.
Seto: Yami no Yuugi! **growls**
Wildwolf: Break it up! Seto-sama! Apologize to Ryou-chan for risking his life! Now! And no, this isn't shounen ai, I'm just miffed.
Seto: Gomen. **walks off**
Quatre: I get the feeling he only said that cause Wildwolf-chan's been threatening to hit him with a mallet.
Shadii: **nod**
Shadii jaguar: **nod-nod**
Chibi: **huggles the stuffed jaguar**