Author ~ Halo Son
Rating ~ R
Disclaimer ~ How many times must I say I don't own Lord of the Rings?! I do however own the songs used in this chapter and I thank my friend, Katie, for translating them into elvish for me.
Author's Note ~ Here's the second story in my first LOTR trilogy (and probably not my last *hint hint* ^_~ ). The characters Trelan, Raniean, Celboril and Moranuen are made up characters belonging to Cassia and Sio and they gave me permission to use them in my story, so DO NOT steal them!
Summary ~ The sequel to 'Falling Into Silence'. It is exactly a year since the fall of Neron and the supposed 'death' of Aragorn. However during that time, Legolas has never given up the possibility that Aragorn may still be alive and has endlessly searched for him, without success. Then one night in Rivendell, Elladan is wounded and almost killed and it looks as though it was intentional. When Legolas begins to investigate, he discovers, much to his horror, that the evil responsible is from the depths of Mordor itself and a familiar darkness has a new and deadly weapon in its clutches, a weapon that Legolas could never bring himself to destroy.
WARNING ~ This story contains acts of torture, violence and two accounts of implied rape. Nothing is handled in a graphic manner, however if you do not like these kinds of stories then please DO NOT read this fic.
This chapter is specially dedicated to Katie Petruzzelli for helping me translate the songs to elvish and to Prince Tyler Briefs cause she loves the elven twins of Rivendell. ^-^
The Lord Of The Rings
Darkness Haunting
Chapter 8-Songs Of Healing; Songs of Hope
A few more days passed since Legolas and Elladan has discovered about the horrible truth of the extent of the evil that the demon, Muerte, had done to Aragorn and Elrohir.
Legolas sighed a little before getting up from the chair he has been resting in, in the Great hall of fire. It was late and although he didn't feel like it, he needed sleep.
Legolas walked down the silent hall towards his room when he was stopped by a muffled sound coming from Aragorn's room.
Legolas peered into the man's room, slightly opening the door so he could get a better look inside.
He could see his human friend struggling, twisting and turning in his bed. He seemed to be having another nightmare.
Legolas quietly stepped into the room and softly shut the door behind him and walked over to the chair next to the man's bed and sat down silently, not awaking him.
He watched with aggrieved eyes as Aragorn contorted within his bed, reliving his torture in his dreams.
How much Legolas hated watching Aragorn suffer like this. He wanted to do something to help him, but knowing just the kind of evil he had been put through, he wasn't sure what he could do.
Then he remembered Lord Elrond's words. Simply being with Aragorn and reassuring him and giving him unspoken comfort and support was enough to help him.
To Legolas, it was far better than watching his human friend writhe in pain and anguish, as he seemed to do so.
Seeing Aragorn struggle as he did, it was too much for the elf prince to bare any longer. He had seen his human friend suffer enough.
Legolas stood up from the chair and leaned down to the human's ear, whispering softly in elvish. His words had a momentary calming effect on Aragorn, but it was all the time Legolas needed.
Carefully the elf prince wrapped an arm around the man's shoulders and gently lifted him up and sat down on the bed behind him, delicately bringing Aragorn back down so he rested against the elf's chest.
In his fevered sleep Aragorn twisted, whimpering under Legolas' gentle but firm touch. With a small smile Legolas brushed the man's damp hair and began to sing.
Lu'me,
Nalla garnech le
Cheba i estel cuin
(Sometimes,
You have to cry
To keep the hope alive)
Lu'me,
Nalla garnech le
Cheba i galad lhach
(Sometimes,
You have to cry
To keep the light aflame)
Lu'me,
Nalla garnech le
Ana ta umea u talnotto sule li'n
(Sometimes,
You have to cry
To prove that evil cannot crush your soul)
The light and soft elvish singing drifted through ever hall, drifted through every corner, drifted through every part of Rivendell. The dark and ominous clouds above seemed to suddenly dissipate and the light of the moon beamed down to those below.
Im ae cen hen li'n
Caure i le mor
Eith querna si
Toron o ni'n ore
Im si
A im uvau ten talta le
(I can see in your eyes
How much you fear the dark
Well just turn around now
Brother of my heart
I am here
And I won't let you fall)
Pel edol a nalla
Im cheba estel cuin li'n
Pel edol a nalla
Im cheba galad lhach li'n
Pel edol a nalla
Im uva ten umea talnotto sule li'n
(Go ahead and cry
I'll keep your hope alive
Go ahead and cry
I'll keep your light aflame
Go ahead and cry
I won't let evil crush your soul)
The elvish song calmed Aragorn and he relaxed in Legolas' clasp. Though his breathing was still ragged and sharp, he was beginning to heal.
On the outside was the most obviously place, but inside where the eye could not see, that too was starting to revive, though much more slowly. Those deep-rooted scars would take years to mend, but in time they would, though they would never fully heal.
Droplets of silver began to form in the man's eyes and they trickled freely down his pale face.
With a brush of his finger, Legolas wiped them away from his closed, tightly shut eyes and leaned down so his forehead rested on Aragorn's.
Im uva nautha piinea mellon ni'n
Pel edol a nalla
Im uve intyale ya matha le
Wil Im ar le an el tu'l.
Tir esse ni'n hen, noldo han sanda le
Tangado orcal a cae
A cuiva guin anar.
(I won't think any less, my friend
So go ahead and cry
I can't imagine what you feel
But I will stand by your side
Look in my eyes, you know it's true
Now stand tall, proud and strong
And rise with the sun)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Great hall of Fire was radiant with dancing shades of orange, yellow, red and gold as the flames of the warm fire flickered and crackled in the soothing atmosphere.
The corner of Elrohir's mouth curled into a smile as his ears picked up the soft elvish singing floating through the halls and walked into the room.
As he did so, he saw Elladan sitting on a chair in front of the fire, gazing into it. The colours of the energetic kindle seemed to prance across his face and almost giving a whole new look to the older twin.
Elrohir opened his mouth to speak, but closed it again when he noticed something about his twin brother.
He gazed into the fire as if entranced by it and the light cast upon his face revealed a hidden truth.
He looked starkly pale and his whole body seemed to exude a certain weariness that immersed him like a shadow. In veracity, after the last encounter with his twin, Elladan had not eaten for several days and had little or no sleep.
Elladan bitterly resented himself and his actions in forcing Aragorn to tell him what the demon had done to him and Elrohir. From that cold glare Elrohir had given him afterwards, Elladan was sure his twin hated him. He was sure he had pushed both his brothers away and now felt lost, alone and cut off.
His heart was aching and bleeding with regret and sorrow and the shock itself from the horrible discovery of truth was now slowly crushing him.
An enraged guilt was swallowing him alive and he couldn't stop it, not that he wanted to stop it. Over and over his mind kept betraying him, blaming him for everything that had happened to Elrohir and Aragorn and whether he knew it or, such rebukes were killing him.
Elladan was dying.
Elrohir slowly walked towards his twin brother, tipping his head curiously and worriedly.
"Elladan?"
No response.
"Elladan? Please…"
"What?"
Elrohir sighed quietly; at least Elladan was talking.
"Are you alright?"
"Yes."
Elrohir's eyebrows furrowed in silent frustration at his brother's one-word replies and he sat down on the arm of the chair, looking over Elladan's face.
"Are you sure you're alright Elladan? You're not looking well brother." A small smile curled on his face and his voice brimmed with a tint of humour. "You're beginning to look like a goblin again."
Elladan made no reply and Elrohir sighed.
"Please Elladan…talk to me brother."
Elladan glanced at his twin and replied, "How can I when I have nothing to say?"
"You must have something to say Elladan." Elrohir said softly. "Or you would not keep it inside you as you are."
Elladan sighed, "Nay brother, I have nothing inside of me."
Elrohir guessed there was something more to that comment than just the obvious.
"What do you mean?"
"Just what I said. I have nothing within me…I am empty."
Elrohir's suspicions were correct.
"Of course you are not empty! You have me…Estel…fa-"
"I am like a shadow." Elladan interrupted. "I have nothing because I am nothing."
"Stop it Elladan!" Elrohir replied with a fierce tone. "That's not true and you know it! You are my brother. You are brother to Estel, friend to Legolas and son of Lord Elrond. How can you say you are nothing when you are so much?!"
Elladan made no comeback. Instead he stood up and started walking towards the other end of the room to leave. Elrohir stood up as well, watching him.
"I am sorry I cannot be the brother you want me to be." Elladan murmured as he walked.
Elrohir's eyes widened and he jumped forward a few steps, "What are you talking about Elladan?! Of course you're the brother I want you to be!"
When Elladan didn't reply, Elrohir walked forward again, his eyes raging, "Why are you always blaming yourself Elladan?!"
That got a response, for Elladan stopped walking and stood still, though he didn't turn around.
"It's always the same Elladan, your always blaming yourself for things you cannot control!" Elrohir continued. "Arathorn and Gilraen, mother, all injuries involving me, Estel and even father and Legolas, you have always blamed yourself for them all!"
Elladan breathed in sharply as tears began to well in his eyes as Elrohir accounted for all the time he had blamed himself for accidents and injuries. The bitter memories stung his heart, as did the tone of Elrohir's voice, though he knew the twin couldn't help it.
"You cannot do this Elladan." Elrohir finally said in a calmer voice. "You cannot put blame on your shoulders when it is not your blame to carry."
Elladan's eyes widened as he heard the last words Elrohir spoke. His mother had often used the exact same words to him when he was a young one and old memories came flooding back.
"If mother were here, she would say the same." Elrohir whispered, lowering his head a little as his own tears began to form. "It…it is my fault."
Elladan spun around, staring long and hard at his twin, "W-What?"
Elrohir faltered a little, closing his eyes tight, "I was not strong enough...if I had fought him off this would not have happened to Estel or myself. If I had been like you Elladan...brave and strong....instead of a coward this would not have happened!"
Elrohir was beginning to sound just like he did when he was a young child and Elladan was having none of it. Long ago, he thought he had taught Elrohir just how strong he was, but it appeared as though he needed reminding.
Elladan walked over to him and gripped both his shoulders tightly, surprising the younger twin.
"How dare you say that! How DARE you say that Elrohir!" He said, his eyes burning with a mixture of anger and sorrow. "No coward are you brother, no coward! If you had been anything less than brave and strong you would've died after the demon had finished his use for you!" Elladan looked down, letting go of Elrohir's shoulders. "Me? Brave and strong? That I am not brother. I am the one who is a coward."
Elrohir's mouth was wide and he felt stunned, but he quickly shook himself out of it, "You were the one brave enough to defend Estel!"
"You would've done the same Elrohir, I know. You were the one brave enough to face the demon to protect Estel…and you had to…for I was not there to protect you both and so Elrohir, it is my fault."
Elladan glanced upwards, letting go of a shaky breath as silent silver tracked its way down his face and he continued.
"Oh if only I could take both your pain and Estel's away from you and place it on my shoulders. You are right, I will never know how you feel, but if it could take away your pain I wish I could! It was my fault! MY FAULT! My rage took control and I couldn't help myself! I should've contained my anger! I should've protected you and Estel from harm because I am your brother! That is my duty! It is what I am meant to do! I failed.....I failed you and I failed Estel. I failed my family, my friends and myself. I failed you all. I cannot live with that."
As Elrohir stared in shock at the confession from his older twin, Elladan took a step back and his eyes became half lidded. Before Elrohir could respond, Elladan collapsed on the floor.
"ELLADAN!" Elrohir cried as he kneeled next to his brother, wrapping an arm around his shoulders.
It was then Elrohir realised just how far Elladan's legacy of self-guilt ran and it horrified him. He also realised how far along Elladan's fading process was and he began to choke up with tears, his body trembling in fear.
"No Elladan…no…" He sobbed. "I would've died if it had been me in your place Elladan. I could not live knowing what you have gone through to protect me. Please Elladan, you can not do this. You're stronger than this."
Elladan inhaled sharply as his eyes gazed weakly into the tear filled ones of his twin brother and he almost whimpered, "It hurts Elrohir…it hurts."
"I know it hurts Elladan." Elrohir whispered, using his free hand to stroke his brother's hair. "And I hurt seeing you hurt." He leaned forward so their forehead touched. "But you can not leave me brother. You must be strong."
"I can't face this pain anymore brother." Elladan whispered. "The pain of knowing what I could've prevented."
"Please Elladan, please stop blaming yourself." Elrohir replied. "If you hadn't lost your anger when you did then you might have suffered the same fate as Estel and myself. Elladan you can't leave Estel…you cannot leave me to face this pain alone. You must remain strong for us. Do you not see brother? It is because of your strength that we have lived."
Elladan listened in silence as his brother continued, "We all depend on you Elladan. You give us strength, you give us light, you give us hope. How do you think Estel and I have managed to cope with what has happened? It is because of Legolas, father but most importantly you." Elrohir softly kissed Elladan's forehead and smiled weakly. "I love you so much brother. Help me be strong by being strong yourself."
As Elrohir took one of Elladan's pale hands, the meaning of his brother's words dawned on Elladan.
He was letting guilt, fear and pain take control of him and letting it kill him, blinded to the fact that so many people needed him. They needed him to be the strong and unwavering being that he was so they too could follow him and be the same.
Elladan stared up into his brother eyes and with a small smile and nod, his own eyes closed. Elrohir's heart jumped for a second, in fear that his brother had gone, but after a quick check he found he was still breathing and his heartbeat, though weak, was steady.
Elrohir now knew his brother would fight the darkness that had been slowly swallowing him, but it would take time.
Carefully Elrohir picked up his twin brother and carried him into his chambers, laying him down upon his bed and wrapping the blankets around his pale frame. Taking a chair that resided on the other side of the room, Elrohir placed it next to where his brother lay and sat down next to him, holding one of his hands.
"I will not leave your side brother." He whispered. "I will stay here until you awaken."
With a smile he let a song enter his mind.
Im naeth
naeth na le
Mathon del
Matha del na le
Mornie utulie
(I hurt
You hurt too
I feel pain
You feel pain too
Darkness has come)
Nallon
Nalla na le
Norie amarth
Ne ngwalme ephel met
Mornie utulie
(I cry
You cry too
Why must fate
Bind us in suffering
Darkness has come)
Toron Im ucaure
Hir noldo le
ucaure na
A utuva i galad
Mornie alanta
(But brother I fear not
So you must learn
Not to fear too
And find the light
Darkness will fall)
Im pel le, nallan le
Beriatho le, lalaitho le
Im mel le, golo ve eithel le
Mae cara le, mae cara Im
Mornie alanta
(I hold you, cry with you
I cherish you, laugh with you
I love you, I know you do too
You forgive, I forgive
Darkness will fall)
Toron nin, si tongado Im
Vanina guinon
Area na lin
A thalar uva vin
Mornie alantie
(So my brother, here I stay
Right where I belong
Next to your side
And our strength will bind
Darkness has fallen)
Wille, celiel a ol
Ve soron narie hwesta
Metta telim
Na galad, mel a estel
Mornie alantie
(Fly, soar, dream
Like an eagle upon the breeze
Together we shall return
To light, love and hope
Darkness has fallen)
Si' telim cuiva metta
Ve i anar, orchal a thalion
Aina toron ore nin
(Now we shall rise together
Like the sun, proud and strong
Dear brother of my heart)
TBC…
*hands out Elrond plushies to everyone* I think everyone deserves one for being faithful reviewers and for not killing me for the torture I've put everyone through ^-^
Rating ~ R
Disclaimer ~ How many times must I say I don't own Lord of the Rings?! I do however own the songs used in this chapter and I thank my friend, Katie, for translating them into elvish for me.
Author's Note ~ Here's the second story in my first LOTR trilogy (and probably not my last *hint hint* ^_~ ). The characters Trelan, Raniean, Celboril and Moranuen are made up characters belonging to Cassia and Sio and they gave me permission to use them in my story, so DO NOT steal them!
Summary ~ The sequel to 'Falling Into Silence'. It is exactly a year since the fall of Neron and the supposed 'death' of Aragorn. However during that time, Legolas has never given up the possibility that Aragorn may still be alive and has endlessly searched for him, without success. Then one night in Rivendell, Elladan is wounded and almost killed and it looks as though it was intentional. When Legolas begins to investigate, he discovers, much to his horror, that the evil responsible is from the depths of Mordor itself and a familiar darkness has a new and deadly weapon in its clutches, a weapon that Legolas could never bring himself to destroy.
WARNING ~ This story contains acts of torture, violence and two accounts of implied rape. Nothing is handled in a graphic manner, however if you do not like these kinds of stories then please DO NOT read this fic.
This chapter is specially dedicated to Katie Petruzzelli for helping me translate the songs to elvish and to Prince Tyler Briefs cause she loves the elven twins of Rivendell. ^-^
The Lord Of The Rings
Darkness Haunting
Chapter 8-Songs Of Healing; Songs of Hope
A few more days passed since Legolas and Elladan has discovered about the horrible truth of the extent of the evil that the demon, Muerte, had done to Aragorn and Elrohir.
Legolas sighed a little before getting up from the chair he has been resting in, in the Great hall of fire. It was late and although he didn't feel like it, he needed sleep.
Legolas walked down the silent hall towards his room when he was stopped by a muffled sound coming from Aragorn's room.
Legolas peered into the man's room, slightly opening the door so he could get a better look inside.
He could see his human friend struggling, twisting and turning in his bed. He seemed to be having another nightmare.
Legolas quietly stepped into the room and softly shut the door behind him and walked over to the chair next to the man's bed and sat down silently, not awaking him.
He watched with aggrieved eyes as Aragorn contorted within his bed, reliving his torture in his dreams.
How much Legolas hated watching Aragorn suffer like this. He wanted to do something to help him, but knowing just the kind of evil he had been put through, he wasn't sure what he could do.
Then he remembered Lord Elrond's words. Simply being with Aragorn and reassuring him and giving him unspoken comfort and support was enough to help him.
To Legolas, it was far better than watching his human friend writhe in pain and anguish, as he seemed to do so.
Seeing Aragorn struggle as he did, it was too much for the elf prince to bare any longer. He had seen his human friend suffer enough.
Legolas stood up from the chair and leaned down to the human's ear, whispering softly in elvish. His words had a momentary calming effect on Aragorn, but it was all the time Legolas needed.
Carefully the elf prince wrapped an arm around the man's shoulders and gently lifted him up and sat down on the bed behind him, delicately bringing Aragorn back down so he rested against the elf's chest.
In his fevered sleep Aragorn twisted, whimpering under Legolas' gentle but firm touch. With a small smile Legolas brushed the man's damp hair and began to sing.
Lu'me,
Nalla garnech le
Cheba i estel cuin
(Sometimes,
You have to cry
To keep the hope alive)
Lu'me,
Nalla garnech le
Cheba i galad lhach
(Sometimes,
You have to cry
To keep the light aflame)
Lu'me,
Nalla garnech le
Ana ta umea u talnotto sule li'n
(Sometimes,
You have to cry
To prove that evil cannot crush your soul)
The light and soft elvish singing drifted through ever hall, drifted through every corner, drifted through every part of Rivendell. The dark and ominous clouds above seemed to suddenly dissipate and the light of the moon beamed down to those below.
Im ae cen hen li'n
Caure i le mor
Eith querna si
Toron o ni'n ore
Im si
A im uvau ten talta le
(I can see in your eyes
How much you fear the dark
Well just turn around now
Brother of my heart
I am here
And I won't let you fall)
Pel edol a nalla
Im cheba estel cuin li'n
Pel edol a nalla
Im cheba galad lhach li'n
Pel edol a nalla
Im uva ten umea talnotto sule li'n
(Go ahead and cry
I'll keep your hope alive
Go ahead and cry
I'll keep your light aflame
Go ahead and cry
I won't let evil crush your soul)
The elvish song calmed Aragorn and he relaxed in Legolas' clasp. Though his breathing was still ragged and sharp, he was beginning to heal.
On the outside was the most obviously place, but inside where the eye could not see, that too was starting to revive, though much more slowly. Those deep-rooted scars would take years to mend, but in time they would, though they would never fully heal.
Droplets of silver began to form in the man's eyes and they trickled freely down his pale face.
With a brush of his finger, Legolas wiped them away from his closed, tightly shut eyes and leaned down so his forehead rested on Aragorn's.
Im uva nautha piinea mellon ni'n
Pel edol a nalla
Im uve intyale ya matha le
Wil Im ar le an el tu'l.
Tir esse ni'n hen, noldo han sanda le
Tangado orcal a cae
A cuiva guin anar.
(I won't think any less, my friend
So go ahead and cry
I can't imagine what you feel
But I will stand by your side
Look in my eyes, you know it's true
Now stand tall, proud and strong
And rise with the sun)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Great hall of Fire was radiant with dancing shades of orange, yellow, red and gold as the flames of the warm fire flickered and crackled in the soothing atmosphere.
The corner of Elrohir's mouth curled into a smile as his ears picked up the soft elvish singing floating through the halls and walked into the room.
As he did so, he saw Elladan sitting on a chair in front of the fire, gazing into it. The colours of the energetic kindle seemed to prance across his face and almost giving a whole new look to the older twin.
Elrohir opened his mouth to speak, but closed it again when he noticed something about his twin brother.
He gazed into the fire as if entranced by it and the light cast upon his face revealed a hidden truth.
He looked starkly pale and his whole body seemed to exude a certain weariness that immersed him like a shadow. In veracity, after the last encounter with his twin, Elladan had not eaten for several days and had little or no sleep.
Elladan bitterly resented himself and his actions in forcing Aragorn to tell him what the demon had done to him and Elrohir. From that cold glare Elrohir had given him afterwards, Elladan was sure his twin hated him. He was sure he had pushed both his brothers away and now felt lost, alone and cut off.
His heart was aching and bleeding with regret and sorrow and the shock itself from the horrible discovery of truth was now slowly crushing him.
An enraged guilt was swallowing him alive and he couldn't stop it, not that he wanted to stop it. Over and over his mind kept betraying him, blaming him for everything that had happened to Elrohir and Aragorn and whether he knew it or, such rebukes were killing him.
Elladan was dying.
Elrohir slowly walked towards his twin brother, tipping his head curiously and worriedly.
"Elladan?"
No response.
"Elladan? Please…"
"What?"
Elrohir sighed quietly; at least Elladan was talking.
"Are you alright?"
"Yes."
Elrohir's eyebrows furrowed in silent frustration at his brother's one-word replies and he sat down on the arm of the chair, looking over Elladan's face.
"Are you sure you're alright Elladan? You're not looking well brother." A small smile curled on his face and his voice brimmed with a tint of humour. "You're beginning to look like a goblin again."
Elladan made no reply and Elrohir sighed.
"Please Elladan…talk to me brother."
Elladan glanced at his twin and replied, "How can I when I have nothing to say?"
"You must have something to say Elladan." Elrohir said softly. "Or you would not keep it inside you as you are."
Elladan sighed, "Nay brother, I have nothing inside of me."
Elrohir guessed there was something more to that comment than just the obvious.
"What do you mean?"
"Just what I said. I have nothing within me…I am empty."
Elrohir's suspicions were correct.
"Of course you are not empty! You have me…Estel…fa-"
"I am like a shadow." Elladan interrupted. "I have nothing because I am nothing."
"Stop it Elladan!" Elrohir replied with a fierce tone. "That's not true and you know it! You are my brother. You are brother to Estel, friend to Legolas and son of Lord Elrond. How can you say you are nothing when you are so much?!"
Elladan made no comeback. Instead he stood up and started walking towards the other end of the room to leave. Elrohir stood up as well, watching him.
"I am sorry I cannot be the brother you want me to be." Elladan murmured as he walked.
Elrohir's eyes widened and he jumped forward a few steps, "What are you talking about Elladan?! Of course you're the brother I want you to be!"
When Elladan didn't reply, Elrohir walked forward again, his eyes raging, "Why are you always blaming yourself Elladan?!"
That got a response, for Elladan stopped walking and stood still, though he didn't turn around.
"It's always the same Elladan, your always blaming yourself for things you cannot control!" Elrohir continued. "Arathorn and Gilraen, mother, all injuries involving me, Estel and even father and Legolas, you have always blamed yourself for them all!"
Elladan breathed in sharply as tears began to well in his eyes as Elrohir accounted for all the time he had blamed himself for accidents and injuries. The bitter memories stung his heart, as did the tone of Elrohir's voice, though he knew the twin couldn't help it.
"You cannot do this Elladan." Elrohir finally said in a calmer voice. "You cannot put blame on your shoulders when it is not your blame to carry."
Elladan's eyes widened as he heard the last words Elrohir spoke. His mother had often used the exact same words to him when he was a young one and old memories came flooding back.
"If mother were here, she would say the same." Elrohir whispered, lowering his head a little as his own tears began to form. "It…it is my fault."
Elladan spun around, staring long and hard at his twin, "W-What?"
Elrohir faltered a little, closing his eyes tight, "I was not strong enough...if I had fought him off this would not have happened to Estel or myself. If I had been like you Elladan...brave and strong....instead of a coward this would not have happened!"
Elrohir was beginning to sound just like he did when he was a young child and Elladan was having none of it. Long ago, he thought he had taught Elrohir just how strong he was, but it appeared as though he needed reminding.
Elladan walked over to him and gripped both his shoulders tightly, surprising the younger twin.
"How dare you say that! How DARE you say that Elrohir!" He said, his eyes burning with a mixture of anger and sorrow. "No coward are you brother, no coward! If you had been anything less than brave and strong you would've died after the demon had finished his use for you!" Elladan looked down, letting go of Elrohir's shoulders. "Me? Brave and strong? That I am not brother. I am the one who is a coward."
Elrohir's mouth was wide and he felt stunned, but he quickly shook himself out of it, "You were the one brave enough to defend Estel!"
"You would've done the same Elrohir, I know. You were the one brave enough to face the demon to protect Estel…and you had to…for I was not there to protect you both and so Elrohir, it is my fault."
Elladan glanced upwards, letting go of a shaky breath as silent silver tracked its way down his face and he continued.
"Oh if only I could take both your pain and Estel's away from you and place it on my shoulders. You are right, I will never know how you feel, but if it could take away your pain I wish I could! It was my fault! MY FAULT! My rage took control and I couldn't help myself! I should've contained my anger! I should've protected you and Estel from harm because I am your brother! That is my duty! It is what I am meant to do! I failed.....I failed you and I failed Estel. I failed my family, my friends and myself. I failed you all. I cannot live with that."
As Elrohir stared in shock at the confession from his older twin, Elladan took a step back and his eyes became half lidded. Before Elrohir could respond, Elladan collapsed on the floor.
"ELLADAN!" Elrohir cried as he kneeled next to his brother, wrapping an arm around his shoulders.
It was then Elrohir realised just how far Elladan's legacy of self-guilt ran and it horrified him. He also realised how far along Elladan's fading process was and he began to choke up with tears, his body trembling in fear.
"No Elladan…no…" He sobbed. "I would've died if it had been me in your place Elladan. I could not live knowing what you have gone through to protect me. Please Elladan, you can not do this. You're stronger than this."
Elladan inhaled sharply as his eyes gazed weakly into the tear filled ones of his twin brother and he almost whimpered, "It hurts Elrohir…it hurts."
"I know it hurts Elladan." Elrohir whispered, using his free hand to stroke his brother's hair. "And I hurt seeing you hurt." He leaned forward so their forehead touched. "But you can not leave me brother. You must be strong."
"I can't face this pain anymore brother." Elladan whispered. "The pain of knowing what I could've prevented."
"Please Elladan, please stop blaming yourself." Elrohir replied. "If you hadn't lost your anger when you did then you might have suffered the same fate as Estel and myself. Elladan you can't leave Estel…you cannot leave me to face this pain alone. You must remain strong for us. Do you not see brother? It is because of your strength that we have lived."
Elladan listened in silence as his brother continued, "We all depend on you Elladan. You give us strength, you give us light, you give us hope. How do you think Estel and I have managed to cope with what has happened? It is because of Legolas, father but most importantly you." Elrohir softly kissed Elladan's forehead and smiled weakly. "I love you so much brother. Help me be strong by being strong yourself."
As Elrohir took one of Elladan's pale hands, the meaning of his brother's words dawned on Elladan.
He was letting guilt, fear and pain take control of him and letting it kill him, blinded to the fact that so many people needed him. They needed him to be the strong and unwavering being that he was so they too could follow him and be the same.
Elladan stared up into his brother eyes and with a small smile and nod, his own eyes closed. Elrohir's heart jumped for a second, in fear that his brother had gone, but after a quick check he found he was still breathing and his heartbeat, though weak, was steady.
Elrohir now knew his brother would fight the darkness that had been slowly swallowing him, but it would take time.
Carefully Elrohir picked up his twin brother and carried him into his chambers, laying him down upon his bed and wrapping the blankets around his pale frame. Taking a chair that resided on the other side of the room, Elrohir placed it next to where his brother lay and sat down next to him, holding one of his hands.
"I will not leave your side brother." He whispered. "I will stay here until you awaken."
With a smile he let a song enter his mind.
Im naeth
naeth na le
Mathon del
Matha del na le
Mornie utulie
(I hurt
You hurt too
I feel pain
You feel pain too
Darkness has come)
Nallon
Nalla na le
Norie amarth
Ne ngwalme ephel met
Mornie utulie
(I cry
You cry too
Why must fate
Bind us in suffering
Darkness has come)
Toron Im ucaure
Hir noldo le
ucaure na
A utuva i galad
Mornie alanta
(But brother I fear not
So you must learn
Not to fear too
And find the light
Darkness will fall)
Im pel le, nallan le
Beriatho le, lalaitho le
Im mel le, golo ve eithel le
Mae cara le, mae cara Im
Mornie alanta
(I hold you, cry with you
I cherish you, laugh with you
I love you, I know you do too
You forgive, I forgive
Darkness will fall)
Toron nin, si tongado Im
Vanina guinon
Area na lin
A thalar uva vin
Mornie alantie
(So my brother, here I stay
Right where I belong
Next to your side
And our strength will bind
Darkness has fallen)
Wille, celiel a ol
Ve soron narie hwesta
Metta telim
Na galad, mel a estel
Mornie alantie
(Fly, soar, dream
Like an eagle upon the breeze
Together we shall return
To light, love and hope
Darkness has fallen)
Si' telim cuiva metta
Ve i anar, orchal a thalion
Aina toron ore nin
(Now we shall rise together
Like the sun, proud and strong
Dear brother of my heart)
TBC…
*hands out Elrond plushies to everyone* I think everyone deserves one for being faithful reviewers and for not killing me for the torture I've put everyone through ^-^