1 Living In Her Shadow
1.1 Chapter 2
Samantha couldn't move. Her mind was racing but she kept coming back to the same thought. Is it really me he wants?
Mackenzie was everything one person could hope to be . . . beautiful, intelligent, sweet, and kind. Samantha envied how easy things seemed to be for her. They had known each other since they were small children. Samantha could still remember meeting her that day in first grade. A little girl with blond pigtails and big, bright, blue eyes stood before the class. She stood tall as the other kids looker her over, wondering who she was and where she had come from. If she was scared or nervous, she never let on. Mrs. Smith introduced her to the class, Mackenzie Stewart. Mrs. Smith assigned her a seat next to Samantha. From then on, Mackenzie and Samantha were the closest of friends, and in thirteen years there had never been a harsh word between them.
Mackenzie and Matt had been high school sweethearts, but Samantha could remember him tagging along with them long before high school. He was devoted to her. If there was anything she ever needed or wanted, all she had to do was ask and he was more than happy to provide. Samantha was jealous of their relationship, not that she wanted to be with Matt, she wanted what they had. Samantha had her share of boyfriends in high school and plenty of her own high school drama, but she secretly yearned to be as in love as Mackenzie and Matt were, and to have someone love her in return. It was never her plan to end up with her best friend's boyfriend. It just happened. Lately Samantha wondered if it were all coincidence or if Matt was trying to hold on to a piece of Mackenzie in some way.
Samantha forced herself to remember where she was and what was happening. She looked down at Matt who gazed back at her expectantly. "Tell me that you want me. Tell me that you need me."
She saw a stunned look cross Matt's face. This wasn't what he expected to hear. As her words registered in his head, a look of sadness and disappointment appeared.
"You can't, can you?" Samantha questioned him. "I know you miss her, I do too. Everyday I think of her, but my life has to go on and so does yours." Samantha continued, hoping he would see that she understood how he felt. "I never expected you to stop loving her, but I expected you to love me. I don't care what you say but tell me something . . . anything to make me stay. Make it good. I may not be the one you want, but I'll be damned if I'm going to be someone you settle for." Samantha was becoming more and more upset. "Unrequited love is something for sonnets and Greek tragedies. I deserve more than stress and frustration. I deserve someone who can love me and care for me as much as I do for him. Someone who will love me for who I am, not for who I remind him of." Samantha paused to calm herself. She didn't want Matt to feel like she was attacking him. She loved him. "I don't think that's asking too much. If you can't handle that, please, let me know now . . . before it's too late, before one of us makes the mistake of a lifetime."
Matt didn't know what to do or how to respond.
Samantha allowed him a moment to grasp what she had said. The she softly brushed her hand across his cheek. There was a gentle quality to her as she spoke. "I want to be your wife. I want to spend my life with you. I just need to know that you really want to be with me, that you aren't wishing I were someone else. I've spent the last five years loving and supporting you, trying to live up to this memory you have of the perfect woman. I can't compete with that, and I won't. Either you can let go of her and accept me for me . . . or you can let me go." Samantha ended solemnly.
1.1 Chapter 2
Samantha couldn't move. Her mind was racing but she kept coming back to the same thought. Is it really me he wants?
Mackenzie was everything one person could hope to be . . . beautiful, intelligent, sweet, and kind. Samantha envied how easy things seemed to be for her. They had known each other since they were small children. Samantha could still remember meeting her that day in first grade. A little girl with blond pigtails and big, bright, blue eyes stood before the class. She stood tall as the other kids looker her over, wondering who she was and where she had come from. If she was scared or nervous, she never let on. Mrs. Smith introduced her to the class, Mackenzie Stewart. Mrs. Smith assigned her a seat next to Samantha. From then on, Mackenzie and Samantha were the closest of friends, and in thirteen years there had never been a harsh word between them.
Mackenzie and Matt had been high school sweethearts, but Samantha could remember him tagging along with them long before high school. He was devoted to her. If there was anything she ever needed or wanted, all she had to do was ask and he was more than happy to provide. Samantha was jealous of their relationship, not that she wanted to be with Matt, she wanted what they had. Samantha had her share of boyfriends in high school and plenty of her own high school drama, but she secretly yearned to be as in love as Mackenzie and Matt were, and to have someone love her in return. It was never her plan to end up with her best friend's boyfriend. It just happened. Lately Samantha wondered if it were all coincidence or if Matt was trying to hold on to a piece of Mackenzie in some way.
Samantha forced herself to remember where she was and what was happening. She looked down at Matt who gazed back at her expectantly. "Tell me that you want me. Tell me that you need me."
She saw a stunned look cross Matt's face. This wasn't what he expected to hear. As her words registered in his head, a look of sadness and disappointment appeared.
"You can't, can you?" Samantha questioned him. "I know you miss her, I do too. Everyday I think of her, but my life has to go on and so does yours." Samantha continued, hoping he would see that she understood how he felt. "I never expected you to stop loving her, but I expected you to love me. I don't care what you say but tell me something . . . anything to make me stay. Make it good. I may not be the one you want, but I'll be damned if I'm going to be someone you settle for." Samantha was becoming more and more upset. "Unrequited love is something for sonnets and Greek tragedies. I deserve more than stress and frustration. I deserve someone who can love me and care for me as much as I do for him. Someone who will love me for who I am, not for who I remind him of." Samantha paused to calm herself. She didn't want Matt to feel like she was attacking him. She loved him. "I don't think that's asking too much. If you can't handle that, please, let me know now . . . before it's too late, before one of us makes the mistake of a lifetime."
Matt didn't know what to do or how to respond.
Samantha allowed him a moment to grasp what she had said. The she softly brushed her hand across his cheek. There was a gentle quality to her as she spoke. "I want to be your wife. I want to spend my life with you. I just need to know that you really want to be with me, that you aren't wishing I were someone else. I've spent the last five years loving and supporting you, trying to live up to this memory you have of the perfect woman. I can't compete with that, and I won't. Either you can let go of her and accept me for me . . . or you can let me go." Samantha ended solemnly.